4.1.16

(No. 666)



DaFUCK 

                                        
      his fingers pinching the cellophane pack in the breast of his fleece found it emptyDaFUCK

that was so unlike so outside him he didnt expect it

a place for everything an everything in its placeWHYdafuck would he pocket an empty pack

he palpitated its empty skin listened to its muffled crinkle willed a misshapen cigarette    came away with zilch

yanking it from his fleece holding it in hand stabbing a finger into it poking around feeling for naught he tore its top open dumped loose tobacco into his palm tossed it into his mouth an chewed it defiantly      vaguely heroic
if assholes could be heroic

defeated


deflated




gawddamn   a cigarette would be nice just right nowtake the edge off  an edge he could take off by himself   rationalise
if he was rationale    but only nicotine would be rational right nowdafuck now an he was miles an miles away from a convenient store

the energy was there the violence for the walk
                                                                           but that wasnt immediate enough not enough to satisfy the monkeys in his head screamin in their cage yanking jerking fullbody at the bars baring canines flinging feces in frustration

whodathought nicotine would ever beast him  or caffiend  booze   drugs would beast him but he expected that    an they fueled his violence to go off the reservation     Inians might be offended but theyd relate they wouldnt stand around pointing finger at each other theyd go off looking to the solve the problem kill the unease the disquiet an hed promise to pickup the first round incentivising them incentivise himself  a buffalo hunt  an if theyd bring it down hed make a gift to them of the first bites of raw hot liver blood running down their arms dripping off their elbows laughing in their lust an manhood

their besotted failure

whod want to look at that



theyd rather pursue the buffalo die in the chase than admit they failed




2257,  Friday,  1  1. 16         

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