While dreaming he had the
ability -- he could argue it was an ability he turned it On
or Off at will -- he possessed the unique ability to participate in his dreams
or Off at will -- he possessed the unique ability to participate in his dreams
not lay like a
cool fish before a kneeling fisherman and his fillet knife
he could be either the
protagonist or his or her antagonist or antagonists
he could be an unseen voyeur uninvolved
only there as a witness
or he could be the dreams Omnipotent manipulating its ragamuffin cast dramatically
comedically or absurdly
ad
nauseam
a deal he might have made with the devil or god was that he never had a reoccurring dream
or as he laughed
a
rerun
and all these things while
dreaming during sleep at night in his bed or in that thing of waking sleep that
queer interlude of semiconsciousness or interrupted by seeing those that came into
his awake eyes watching them flash on their screens from a projector
his awake eyes watching them flash on their screens from a projector
it made his life very
interesting
there was always something to
look forward to
something hed never see again
so he paid keen attention
deliberate attention
and much to
the chagrin of those around him who knew or didnt what he was capable of
he paid attention to them for if
they should ever present themselves in real life --
whatever
that was -- he could key-in off them
that was -- he could key-in off them
having
played the part or parts before
this morning they made love
nearly unconsciously
he didnt open his eyes he didnt know if she opened hers
they fell into one another the
nuzzling and gentle touching like blowing on paper and thin
stick kindling its razor redsmouldering edges glowing
become inflamed
becoming
enraged and engulfing
he was sure if he opened his eyes after she rolled off of on top him that
their scorch and ashes would be clinging languidly or running like spiders on
the ceiling
he didnt open his eyes
he liked the imagery
he listened to her gasping quiet
listened over his own and listened to it finally quiet
her
breaths grew longer and steady and even
she
was like listening to rain fall on trees through their leaves twine in runlet
down their lengths and bark rain on the
roof and whispering down over the shingles and out into the tin gutters
and downspouts onto the ground
and downspouts onto the ground
splashing nourishing
and under her simmering breath he
began to slip away a little a little but
not entirely
He watched an old man carry a
small girl careful when he picked her up
to make sure that her skirt was tucked under her rump and thighs on top of his
arm
he almost laughed at how modest he was for her niggling at his own immodesty
the old man stood on the curb and watched
the traffic the few colourful
cars passing before the street emptied and he entered it an old city street in an old neighborhood he
refused to leave
I live here Its my choice
his family didnt visit often
he took a diagonal tack up the
street mentioning to his granddaughter how interesting the black ribbons of
thick tar looked laying like scars or
dull bandages on the cracks and crackles of the streets rolled bitumen and
gravel
she asked if the street hurt he
said the street was tough and old like him
but maybe
he angled around the front end of
a huge white sedan someones who obviously didnt live in the neighborhood
and as he went around the sedans nose He listened to the old mans
breathing and felt the weight of the little girl in his arms felt the tiredness
in his arms felt his unwillingness to put her down
He felt the salve of her
kiss on his rough unshaven cheek Oh Grampa her breath on his face
him wondering if he
was ever that young if he ever was carried if he ever kissed his grandfathers
or grandmothers faces as they carried him if they did if the birds gliding from
rooftop to rooftop over them gathering bits and twigs for their nests paid any
attention to things under them that didnt fly
He rose up into the bright blue
air above them until they were directly beneath him
He felt the pain in the old mans
chest him freeing a hand from his granddaughter to clutch at it wrestle it off
his heart
He felt the Love and the strike
of the heart attack and how the two were very much alike
He felt the old mans panic that
he was going to drop her hard onto the back of her head when he fell when his
legs went out from under him
they
were growing horribly numb
and He saw on the street in an unequally growing circle the street peel back as if it were burning
paper or skin
the old man struggled Grampa he stopped
his vision went black ashisheartblewupinhischest and remarkably deftly he set her down on her feet very gently
she backed away from him not bothering
to push her dress down it gathered and caught up on her hips her hands went up towards
her face Grampa tears welled into her eyes and she backed away from him reluctantly
Grampa a little more and a little further more
when the old man dropped onto his
knees a brilliant WHITE XPLOSION went out around him etching the street like a spirograph
filling it with sharp hypocycloids the jewelled lines running up her shins onto her
knees onto her dress tangling in her hair she cast a long shadow behind her
barring the lines from the street they sparkled on the curb and the hedgerow
and then up on the face of a hulking brownstone
the brilliant whiteness the rays subsided and then became ochre and red and purple and
black
then evaporated
Grampa the little girl said Grampa
Grampa will you answer me
his eyes were looking directly at her
Grampa
he was dead He could see in his
fading sight her how beautiful she looked to him now how he was
going to miss her but couldnt tell her so and failed to tell her when he may
have
then like an old dead tree the fibers clinging the fibers finally letting
go he slowly collapsed
onto his face
onto his face
his
cheek rouged by the black tarmac
Grampa!
Hed seen enough
He opened his eyes
she was asleep beside him he
hadnt awaken her when he came down out of the sky
he
slipped out from beside her tucking the blanket down to keep their heat in with
her
he stood naked beside the bed and
watched her peaceful sleeping face
he looked deeply into
it
nothing stirred in the depths beneath her eyelids or brow or at her
temples nothing troubled her pursed lips or confused her mouth or sought to
quiver her chin
he watched her heart pulse gently at the long delicate turn of her pale
neck
she slept peacefully and he
wouldnt wake her wake her perhaps from her dreaming
Coffee hed make them coffee
Waking waking in the morning was better with the
taste of fresh coffee in their mouths
1356, Twosday,
23 12. 14
2313, Twosday,
23 12. 14
