4.12.22


his brotherrecovering from cancer remarked about his granddaughter  she had given him a new lease on life

lease

he heard leash 
                leash on life

he preferred leash to lease 
a lease could be revoked
leash

    life would have to take it out of his handmano a mano  he wouldnt be a rollover he enjoyed casting a shadow
he liked walking on wellworn shoes thin soleshe could feel the rottingconcrete of the street the grit sand stones crushed olives dropped acornstheir splitshells sidestepping busted bodies of squirrels cats lying them off in the grass at the side of the road never a dog dogs wear leashesare walked are domesticatedwho wanted to be domesticated  sounds like a thing a woman – sexist perhaps – a thing a woman might pullhe wouldnt pull  she was welcome her freedomwelcome to enjoy him as he enjoyed her  but if she wantedhad an itch he couldnt scratch KNOCK YOURSELF OUT  she was responsible for her happiness  not him

   lease on life 
                  he preferred a leash and whip

after1900,  Day-between-Two-Ts,  21  9. 22 
1344,  Sunday,  4  12. 22 
Allman Brothers  Whipping Post  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YSuoW8MTbZY
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Onitsha Nobel Prize winner J.-M. G. Clezio 
                                             the books not in the library where he livesbut its not the first time hes been irked   worse  copies of books hed like to read have been formatted either audiobooks ebooks or both  and because they exist the library refuses to acquire them in print 
                                                       Onitsha is about the authors time in Nigeria

“Laila goes from one store to another trying on clothes – both women’s and men’s. ‘It’s my way of being someone else,’ she remarks. ‘That is, myself. . . . What I am looking for is my reflection in the mirrors. It frightens me, and attracts me. It’s me, and not me.’”

Laila one-ups him 

she looks in mirrors
                     he doesntdoesnt seek being anyone elsehas hard enough time being who he is  he knows whos the mirrorhas seen him all his life – all his life – Yay how ridiculous 

IF hes going out hell take a looksave himself odd glances or putting off someone fastidious  somebody like Laila

he remarks to a friend he sees oncetwice a week Lemme know if I need a shave only because he knows hes goodlooking enough to get away with his mirrorless gambit like dust collected on artworkhe chuckled  or an antique

0934,  Sunday,  4  12. 22
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he dreamt of squalordreamt of stealing an expensive shinyblack limousine and parking it in the innercitysharing it with homeless on an overnight first-comefirst-serve basisdreamt of beating up a homeless bastard with his fist whoarriving late  shutout  smashed the rearwindow to inconvenience those who were timelywere inside 

he banished him Yare not welcome ever again  
                                                the lout must have had it in his head that violence would remediate his tardiness at the expense of someone other than himself when homeless recovered enough as he stood over him feet planted shoulderwidth apart crossarmed glaring  he crawled away stood then staggered off
                                                                                                    an all the while a refrain sounded in his ears an obsessive tone he couldnt shake Something isnt because it is said Only when tried an true is it 
   Evidence
               Evident
it struck him oddterribly odd that anyoneout of hand would accept the word of another
                                                                                          BAAAAH
Yay there is tha

earlyAM,  Sunday,  4  12. 22
1104,  Sunday,  4  12. 22
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