Its funny when I sit down to eat I eat without pleasure  I ingest 

                                                                       I ingest my sustenance don smack my lips don say Damn thawas tasty its not important its tasty  whas important is that its fuel 

                                                                                    I need nothing more than tha

Occasionally Im fed something more than fuel an Im grateful for the treat 

                                                                             like when a dog gets a meaty bone an doesnt have to dig up one hes buried

Yes grateful 

              not tha it was important its appreciated 

I am grateful 

                Then grateful gets to the end of the line anis recalled when it happens again

Not tha I look for it or forward to it 

   Grateful

             momentarily happy genuinely happy it was offered 

 

939/2139,  Sunday,  23  10. 22

he was slackjawedhad not heard anything like that ever come out of her mouth 

   What?

          rolling her eyes inquisitively  What’s with the face?

he pulled himself together 

                            Im  wondering  if I heard you correctly

You heard me correctly . you listen to me when I speak . . unlike others . they’re too busy in their heads to properly engage in conversation and why I dowhy I bother I don’t know . . it’s all about them them them them them . . . they’ll be the death of me.

Seems to be a lot of them . . 

. . There areno exaggeration . it’s pitifulI’m pitiful . to think otherwiseto think they’ll be different. 

                                                                                                    I’m fuckin’ insufferable. 

No

     Don be harsh on yourself

I’m not . I’m piling on like they pile onthey have their reasons . . not agreeing would be unreasonab . . 

. . Anyare reasonable

I am. Yes.  You know it. 

I do 

     Which is all the more reason you shouldnt give a shit what they thinkwhoever they are   Disassociate

Disassociate? quietly she shook her headtears working into her eyes

 Disassociate 

               Theyll be the death of you

 

impossible big tears rolled down her cheeks

she looked absolutely dejectedforlorn

he took a handkerchief out of his backpockethanded it to her 

                                                                Swear its cleanhavent used it I have two

she choked on a chuckle 

                           Thank you  she wiped her eyesher cheeks  chin 

Yare welcome  I apologise 

                               Thawas harsh 

But true, very true.

Yes true 

he cleared his throat loudly 

                               So you said Why waste a minute being timid

That’s what I said.

Thas strong for you

she chuckledhe was relieved I wasn’t saying it for menot for me . no . . it’s what I understandhave learned from you.

suddenly she smiled large under her shining eyes

looked pitiful

she was breaking his heart 

                              Have learned  But wont practise 

Precisely. As you know because you listen to me. 

                                                     she chuckled again  I live vicariously through youthrough your stories . . don’t ever stop.

1834,  Saturday,  22  10. 22

1126,  Sunday,  23  10. 22

Distant Whale  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X7YzyImFAUo