he liked Oblivion

                        some spelled it  O B L I V I O N

he spelled it

                 H A S H I S H  &  B U F F A L O T R A C E  &  B O U R B O N  B A R R E L- A G E D  S T O U T

D R A G O N ‘ S  M I L K

                            he liked gettin where he was going  slowly incrementally   with all internal baggage banginround reminding him wheres hes beenwhere he iswhere hes going

                                                                               which   didnt impress him in the least

oblivion has texture

                      curvature

like fuckin a Playmate from the Fifties when he wasnt fuckable

                                                                    do not try to curb his enthusiasmimagination

hedcutya

             not a threat
a promise

L O A D E D

                 I spell it right

How else would you spell it?

    Me

          G O A D E D

got to dig aidesadvisors  chemicals  who fly in out of leftfield   brighten my day

                                                                                       a day without sunshine is shit

    it took him to leave the Midwest to appreciate SUN shine

winter  cold   dour

                       Midwest had chose for him

he hadnt chose for himself

    then he did

                  anthought he was a fuckin genius

THIS

       reminded him of when he was a teenagerAGER

                                                            like years meant shit

he was headstails beyond shit

                                  had been informed by hard men who likely crossed some fuckinlines to inform him  defend   him

BE YOU

         Be You  ought to be a commandment

                                                   to his thinkin

but he was high

2007,  Tuesday,  17  12. 24

2235,  Tuesday

    shit keeps creepin in

Whasthis

Keep your voice down

    Whasthis

I . . weve no idea

                    You know how things percolate in his mind

Out of leftfield

Definitely

            I hazard ya havent been round long enough to to appreciate his cognations

Anbest appreciate when I say cognations Im saying nations

                                                                When Pangaea separatedbusted up into landmasses those lands tha became nations have nothing on him

languages  customs

                        fuckanything fuckeverything seem to occur to him

Out of leftfield

    Out of the fuckinblue

what dribbledwhat  disturbed them was

                                             DISTURBED

                                               TURBID

                                              

                                             DISTURBID

                                              WATERS

Wha are disturbid waters

Wha do you understand

                           Cuz your guess is as good as the rest of uss guesses

Seems pat

             I think wha hes seeingremembering is the turquoisecoloured frigid I D  water of the Kenai River

Disturbid  Frigid

    I remember

                  But you werent here yet

No

    But Ive discovered his memories are ours if we apply ourselves

Yes

     Though some of usfor whaever reason fail to have tha ability anare dependent of others  like yourself   to share

    Sharin

1605,  Monday,  16  12. 24

1500,  Tuesday,  17  12. 24

ifnot a Record  a personal recordblew his mind

                                                      to be fair  that didnt take much

he was all-in on the impossible Im-possible unlikely  unexpected

so when it salliedup

he embraced it

                 tied it up with knots he learned in shibari

OVERREACH

               cant tieup hardboiled eggs  but

he peeled four JUMBO eggs inside one minute

                                                 slapped them with flat of a butterknife rolled them in his palmsthen  literally

          unsheathed themliterally

he couldnt remember something happening that quick since he stripped when a Nordic blonde in Miami told him to undress because she wanted to fuck him in the worst way

                                                               on a livingroom floor

in someones apartment she knew that they partied with

took a week for their rugburns to heal

                                         not that that stopped their torrid weeks-long fucking until her boyfriend Thor – NO SHIT – returned from Maryland – none the wiser

2302,  Monday,  16  12. 24

1419,  Tuesday,  17  12. 24

https://goop.com/wellness/sexual-health/what-is-shibari/?srsltid=AfmBOooebMpRJ-3wamlDSfKPoDjgpX07uQVJAJPN9iEJXpxU4uKKBonk

https://www.shibariacademy.com/pages/basic-knots

grim

    DANGER

                 the danger is the anger incorporated in the word  d-anger

a derangement of anger

                         in it  in that   Der-ANGERment

anger incorporated

                     embodied

and asadze  anger is emotional

                                    the person tends to be irrational

thereby

          battlefield danger comes out of everywhere

enemy fire

friendly fire

unfriendly fire

                 endgame

if fortunate

             Death

if unfortunate

                Maimed  Disabled  Disfigured    for Life

    warriors dont fear death

                              he she fears disfigurement he fears emasculation

a healthy young body

disabled

disfigured

dis-spised

dis-spied

             Who wants to look at that?

suffer the ramifications of being tolerated  THE LOOK

                                                          I can tolerate you rate you grade you

because you  dis-whahaveya  lack the capacity to tolerate me . . .

                                                                          GET IT

                                                                     DO YOU GET IT

by your disability unability inability

                                       you are less

thereby  I can TOLERATE YOUbecause

                                             frankly  honestly

I cant lose you in a crowd you stick out like a sore thumb

                                                             I may try to lose you

if I fought a war

                  I wouldnt want to fire killing shotsNO  Id want to shatter your spine  rob you of a lifetime standing upright  getting around unaidedcripple you  disable maim disfigure

                                                                          so in the light of day flinch at your wound  then

Ive killed you day-in day-out

marked

marred

         youll always remember that Day

           indelibly etched in your mind

therein lies the terror-work

dependent on the “kindness” of others

no matter how independent you think you are  

Tuesday,  25  7. 06

1236,  Tuesday,  17  12. 24

when somethings Good too Good to passup   he didnt

Francis Perkins said “The people are what matter to government, and a government should aim to give all the people under its jurisdiction the best possible life.”

https://heathercoxrichardson.substack.com/p/december-16-2024

not terrorise them

not be cruel

              however many American politicians wannabe Cabinet members billionaires are intentionally cruel because they couldnt become who they are if they werent sociopaths-psychopaths or

                                                                                                     redundant cruel motherfuckers

1326,  Tuesday,  17  12. 24

she came upleaned on the top of his cubicle

                                                Alright you, you’re attending, get up.

Get up Christ whayawant from me briskly eyed her breasts plumped against the cubicle edge

    Wha does get up mean  We literal or figurative

Leave it to you.  Literally would be trouble for us under her breath not that I’d mind so let’s opt for the flipside of the coin, shall we?

If we shall I don see how Im needed Not my department or my responsibilities

You’re not aware but most everyone attends.  You’re the glaring exception.   And since you work for me now and since you’re a reflection of me . . . you’ll neverever have to guess what these meetings entail . . because you’ll be there.

Screw brisk he thought  eyeballed her breasts  sighed   I suppose bossDD

she blushed

colour looked good on her

                            not tha hed say

 

seated at an enormous conference pleasantries exchanged down to business  brass tacks an all

his clipboard paper red BIC pen was out

upper left corner he wrote Thursday and the date and the time

                                                                  the room quieted

without lookingup he said Im listenin  I don need to look at anyone to hear them

Agree

the speaker cleared his throat

                                  I . . I just want to be clear . I want your attention.

Got it  though I might hear more than I need to know

                                                        Careful where you tread  Might possibly  inadvertently  open a can of worms

Which is my expertise

                          Plumbing whamight not want to be plumbed

Certainly thas in my personnel file

    You were sayin

he lookedup

              his bossDD sat across from him arms crossed over her chest  he thought BOO  smiled amicably

she didnt

he expected words afterwards

 

as the gentleman from a different department than his spoke he wrote haltingly asif making detailed notes

I sit in on meetings    that have nothing to do with me                                                                                                                                     I sit  because      Im part of a hole

misspelled it on purpose    that somehow Im believed an intrinsic part                   but apart    from

it comes under my sense of not wanting          to belong          to a group that would have me as part of it

Groucho

 

    AFTERWARDS   AFTERWORDS

                                           I want to see you in my office.

Im getting a cup of coffee Can I get you one

I don’t know it’ll be that long.

Oh

     Its gonnabe tha long

Two creams two sugarcubes

                                  I pay attention bossDD 

the harassment begins

one side of the coin or the other

27  7. 06

1129,  Tuesday,  17  12. 24