21.10.16



he wasnt anal
           never cared much for that remark assessment(didnt care for the word) for anyone

least of all himself


his distinct sense his overwhelming sense of space level equilibrium and balance were perceptions he developed and honed from years bent over drafting boards and tables working t-squares and triangles creating mechanical and architectural drawings for school

he saw things differently than people who were unaccustomed to seeing hidden details

it was a matter of perspective


not anal


but he could supposed 
                 one persons anal was anothers pain in the ass



usually the accusation of being anal was rudely proffered and by someone who tended towards sloppy

likely if they kept their mouths shut their work wouldnt then have been compared or their sloppiness more apparent

but they just couldnt help themselves

their attempt to embarrass and/or shame the other dumped the embarrassment and/or shame on them

they projected


virtually all the work he did during his twenties thirties and forties were rarely compared to others 

the idea or the personification of projection was alien

he had difficulty wrapping his head around it

it didnt go off like a starburst for some time but when it did unfortunately it didnt blind him it swept clean his vision as a laser corrected nearsightedness farsightedness and/or astigmatism

sadly 
    once having gone there he couldnt come back and not see

he struggled with not being naïve not being ignorant


he was harsh to begin with

he became harsher

he habitualised the phrase I am sorry to say
                                  then he proceeded to say


he didnt win very many friends


he wasnt looking for friends



fact was friendly 
     



0003,  Thursday,  20  10. 16