19.4.20


             he dreamt
                         and dreaming there were two elements in it that he was sure he wouldnt forget when he woke in the morning

he didnt

to make matters worsenot seventeen hours earlier before he went to sleep it occurred to him he dreamed the night prior and had forgotten two other elements then that had inspired him

0 for 4  look at him  as good as a pro ballplayer

nevertheless he was sure one was sexual in nature

never a bad guess

he had a wonderful sex life in his dreams its what begged him go to sleep at night which in turn he was able to suborn make languish  and directed   he prolonged them
he never came too quick in his dreams

but that was his nature he was piquedexcited to fall asleep


the second element really intrigued him which may have possibly occurred to balance his primal nature
                                                                                                              a teeter-totter
a rational structure  which might help cool that that was irrational

still  he knew he had a better shot at recovering his sexual exploits  exploiting or exploited

he closed his eyes he tried to reimagine reimage what was slipping himwhat may have hung by its nails then perhaps forlorn  exhausted  it fell   Fuck you


“Now wait a minute – I know I’m lying in a field of grass somewhere . . and it’s all in my head . . and I heard her say ONE MORE TIME NOW . . Spill the wine, take that girl” 

not bad for a cat who shot heroin with Hendrix the night Jimi overdosed Burtons burden or maybe not people deal with things differently

Burton performed deicide

Its not often one gets a chancegets close enough to pick off a god
                                                                    Whadahell  wha had he dreamed that he was so confident he wouldnt forget Wha so marveled him that he was sure he couldnt forget
Asshole

he marveled that he remembered hed forgotten the night before 

but he didnt take heed

his Unconscious set him up

maybe its little pokelittle prick leaning towards its deicide

because It and he knew he was going to dream 

he rarely didnt


SEX vs. FUNCTION or RATIONALE he preferred that which was irrational



Awwell nothing came


hed have to go to sleep later and think about it    
   
0110,  Friday,  13  12. 19
1359,  Sunday,  19  4. 20
Everly Brothers  All I Have to Do is Dream  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tbU3zdAgiX8

American


she smiled sweetly pushed her honeyblonde hair out of her eyes 

he really liked her freckles 

they met in a bar introduced by mutual friends who didnt see that fireworks might erupt between them

they surprised themselves

when she mentioned her place was in walking distance he asked if he could walk her home

You’d like to walk me home?

Yah I would I wished you had school books for me to carry Thats probably the last time I walked a girl home

You carried their schoolbooks?

What can I say Im a gentleman 

Did you think something might happen when you got them home?

No I just wanted to spend some time with them outside of school away from other kids Get to know them better
That was plenty

Altruistic?

Selfless Hell no I was interested in them And I hope I inspired some interest in them for me A long shot

A long shot. How do you mean?

I wasnt part of the in-crowd I didnt hang out with people who knew people who knew people Wasnt part of the social fabric

You don’t seem part of the social fabric now.

Im not You are I think you upset a few people letting me walk you home tonight

They weren’t going to walk me home tonight.

Theyd give you a lift

I didn’t want a lift.

Too bad Ive been aching to pick you up

Aching?

Yah I think under your clothingunder the pretty colours the fabric under your feminine is a fit body a hard body Youll weigh a stone

Probably some other time.

Id like  some other time

she smiled beautifullythen laughed she didnt cover her mouth


This is me. she said when they arrived Would you like to come in for a nightcap before heading home?

Id like that please Id like that very much

I thought you might.

Dont be reading my mind Hard to be spontaneous if youre parked beside me on the curb listening

You say the strangest things.

I get that frequently But I think whats going on is people are trying to say what other people want to hear Frankly I dont care If I gotta endure my thoughts Ill be damned if Im going to endure them alone Im taking you with me

You’re taking me? she flipped her hair onto one shoulder exposing her long neck


Whoa beautiful  Lets not put the cart before the horse A great idiom

Idiom. That could be a wet blanket smothering a fire.

Maybe if you didnt know what an idiom is

It’s a condom, right?

Yah Stuffed with your id Cums in different colours For men and women

she smiled again

Thats a wicked smile Ya got a wolf or big cat in you

she ran her tongue across her tongue


Youre not gonna say All the better to eat you with

No. I don’t think you’d mind being eaten.

No Ha  Were swerving all over the road All over Not to say that I dont like the road or the neighbourhoods were finding ourselves in Wha we drinking

You like to play games?

I wouldnt mind playing games with you Whacha got in mind

he followed her into the kitchen she opened the refrigerator door and leaned in from the waist

Christ he said to himself what an ass

A game.  I have beer. her voice was muffled she didnt turn to address him Dark beer.

A woman after my own heart Although something tells me we both knew that before we left the bar

Thank you. I appreciate the compliment. her head still in the refrigerator

Youre welcome An you neednt hurry on my account

Im looking for something to eat. You wouldn’t mind a bite of something, would you?

Youre killing me I could eat something

I didn’t catch that, you could eat something?

I could definitely eat something

I have cheese. A salami.

Finger food Easy 

she emerged with a bomber of Woot Stout Swiss a salami she kicked the frig door shut with her heel and stood upright with the food and beer in her arms You said you like games.

There you are I was missing your face I said I wouldnt mind playing games with you Which isnt the same thing as I like to play games  

Whadya have in mind

Let’s sit at the kitchen table.

she set the beer down Could you open it, please? The drawer, left of the sink.

Happy to

she took a knife from a butchers block beside the stove

I like your gas range I wish I had one My rentals electric Lacks passion

You like fire?

I like fire to sparks or glowing

A man after my own heart.

he almost gulped And the game

Free association.

Youre not a shrink right We havent talked about employment an Id rather not I prefer talking about you an how you are an what turns you on Art  Books Interests Not jobs

You’re not a bit interested how I make my money?

No

No?

No


Why is that?

How you make your money isnt who you are Im interested in you Flesh and blood Im interested in what makes your heart beat

What if I said my job makes my heart beat?

Id say you were fortunate One of the Few Mebbe one of the Proud A Marine Im not keen on soldiers Im not keen on taking orders

Possibly a gamechanger.

Possibly But you were talking about a game Free association

Yes. 

he opened the beer and poured it into glasses she kept in the freezer she sliced the cheese and salami and laid them on a ceramic platter the platter was colourful looked Mexican

The game

Yes, the gam . . 
. . Toast first

Toast?

Yes Well never have this moment again Our first drink together in your home 

You a romantic?

I am An I hope that charms the pants off you Not to worry though Ill be happy to pick them up for ya Toast

I’m not good at toasts.

Say what comes into your mind Epic tends to be common

she held up her glass to his I’m not good at this.

Free association You laid the groundworks

I’m really very happy you offered to walk me home.

Im happy you said yes

To happiness!

And you said you werent any good at this Yes To happiness

they sipped the Woot

Woo damn  this is fortified You been saving this

I was. I thought when I bought it I was looking forward to who I might share it with.

Lil ol me 
          I dont think you saw me coming

I didn’t. I glad I held onto it.

Me too


he took a slab of salami off the platter and holding it between his fingers he said  I noticed you sliced big Committed

Thank you. I don’t like slivers, I don’t like dainty.

Mouthfuls to sips

Mouthfuls to sips.

Free association Timelyhuh

she smiled again

You have dimples Im jealous I dont

she smiled larger

Rubbin it inhuh

I can’t help myself, you’re making me smile.

Thats a good thingyoure enjoying yourself

I am.

I am too Thank you Im happy ya let me walk you home  Very unexpected

Unexpected. You like things unexpectednot a surprise . . rather, simply, unexpected.

Yes A character traitI think My Maw always said it lend to my charm She always thought I was the most charming of her children She encouraged me An nobody wants to let their mother down

A Momma’s boy? I don’t think so.

No 
    Charming


Youre making me restless antsy for more reason than one Lets try your game

Okay. I'll go first, you associate.

Okay

Okay. Coronavirus.

Old news

Come on, play the game with me, and you can’t say nineteeneighteen or polio.

Are you making the rules up as we go along

Maybe. It also maybe in your interest to let me.

Okay  Ill concede  Anif I havent said  I like the way you think  

Thank you.  You’re ready?
                             You aren't balking?

I believe you know me better than that Youah want me to go big

Big?

Yah Big

Sure.

Again

Coronavirus.

Tuskegee

Tuskegee? 

You said big

Tuskegee. Untreated syphilis in black men?

Untreated Negroes

Negroes?

Were playing yah Tuskegee But why cull the sexes Title Two Civil Rights Jim Crow Lynchings Slavery Sent down river Jim Huck Inner cities ghettos slums Pick yourself up by your bootstraps Anif yaint got boots John Shaft  Jackie Brown   Pam Grier 
I need a breath

Go ahead
Nahwait


White supremacy

Now you can go


Awesome.  Free association.  I didn't expect an avalanche.

Not against your rules is it

she shook her head the overhead light picked up the quiet red highlights in her hair

Thank you Plenty to choose from

Oh yes.

Yes.

Tuskegee caught me off guard

Why
      Very American

1833,  Saturday,  18  4. 20
The Temptations  Get Ready  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PV97roslmt0