he couldnt see anything outside the inside of his head

a grim place to be held against his will   his wont

                                                     didnt imagine his prince would come

he wasnt fetching

women get all the princes

he attracted thugswannabe thugs 

                                     You lookin’ at me? 

No  Wasnt

You were.

No  Toldya I wasnt

Were.

            Wanna step outside bitch?

dem was fightin words

                     Bitch

he snarled canines exposed

                                That’s what I said.

Give me a moment to   think it over

                                           Consider

either the smile grew bigger or his canines lengthened

                                                          Sure.   Bitch.

loved when dumb people doubleddown on dumb

                                                    he pickedup the pitcher of beer he was pouring from an drank from it

Still thinkin’?

Appears so  Ya tha thick

he pushed back on his stoolstepped down strode his way

                                                              Let’s take this outside bitch.

appeared it was time for him to use wordsterms of endearment

                                                                      Youre right  Cunt

stepped down from his stool as the guy came upgot in his face

                                                                   Stepback

We takin’ this outsid . .

. . Yah

he stepped back

                slammed him across the side of his head with the halffull pitcherwent down in a heap  kicked him in the balls for good measure

pulledup the hood on his hoodie

wasnt his neighbourhood

                           nobodyd know him from Adam

went out into the night air

                             accosted himself  Job well done bitch

1413,  Saturday,  29  3. 25

Our Lady of Blue Heaven

looking over his shoulder

                               Yathinkinbout givin her a go

Our Lady

Our Lady of Blue Heaven  Yah

    Thinkin

You liked the library at the top of the widewide flight of marble stairs from the nave

I did I do

         Crazy transitionhuh From Mass to the library to the enormous blue poolreflecting pond at its heart surrounded by bookracks desks tables and chairs tha ascendedwha another fourfive storeys

                                                                                                  overlooking it

Woudve loved to have seen the structure from without

Yah   We never got there

                                   You had to swim

I  you forget the blonde tanned athletic lifeguard her cherryred swimsuit sunglasses you coudnt see into the whistle off the lanyard dancing at her breasts

She smelled like hot coconut

No She waswhy  you had to swim

                                           You remember the thirtyfoot tall Blue Madonna behind her

Our Lady of Blue Heaven

Tha was she

Shes hazy  To be fair  a carved cool icon versus a agile mobile hot bod . . .

 

You gonna finish tha thought

    Deduce

Cant

Why

Sidelined by the gorgeous relics in the niches among the tens of thousandshunreds of thousands musty leatherbound books

    Things  objects  versus    a warm woman

You like books

I do

      Prefer livinbreathin women a whole lot more

Particularly if theyre gonna save me from myself

    Save you from yourself

Cramp   Begin to drown

Cramp

Yah

You

Yah

    Any chance the cramp might be an erection

Please

You deduce

There is tha

There is isnt there

Theres there

   This is terrible

Ya know whawoudbe   so cool

Wha

Rather than swim    I walk on water

                                         The reflecting pool  reservoir   tempting

It associatedrelated  up from the nave the chancel not far from the foot of the marble flight glimpsing up

Ascension

Really  Youre dancin at the edge upmightclose to  sacrosanct

 

I thinkI believe    no  I believe   I can walk on water

    Whys tha

No big deal

              Like Jesus  Id know where the stones are

7AMishmash,  reggaefriday,  23  6. 23  written on the back of a page printed at 14:27:10 on 9/19/19

110preferred to 1310,  Saturday,  29  3. 25

    Ya stymied

A tad

Ya thinkin   Joyce

Yaread my mind

    I am your mind

Theres tha

Shall we

We shall

           got up went down the hall to the bedroom and atop his dresser between stained glass bookends his wife gave him for Christmas last century he kept his favourite hardbound books many First Editions  The Dawn of Everything Finnegans Wake The Vorrh Vincent Van Gogh The Autobiography of Benvenuto Cellini illustrated by Dali Henry Millers Tropic of Cancer Tropic of Capricorn Hemingways The Nick Adams Stories The Short Stories of Hemingway  Random Houses 1930 edition of Moby Dick

                                                                                          returned to the studio

We randomly opening Finnegans

We are

Im gonna close my eyes

Me too  Then drop a finger in it

they did

          opening their eyes

Then, then, as soon as the lump his back was turned, with her mealiebag slang over her shulder, Anna Livia, oysterface, forth of her Bassein came.

    Do anything for ya

No   You

Nah

      Once more

Im game

AGAIN

         . . . he got the charm of his optical life when he found himself (hic sunt lennones!) at pointblank range blinking down the barrelYOU REMEMBER    Let me finish    down the barrel of an irregular revolver of the bulldog with a purpose pattern, handled by an unknown quarreler who, supposedly, had been told off shade and shoot shy Shem should the shit show his shiny shnot out awhile to look facts in their face before being hosed and creased (uprip and jack him!) by the six or a dozen of the gay boys. pg 179

Sheesh  Before you rememberwe remember  whats the Latin

Lennones

Yah

Here be lions

Whas tha supposed to mean

                                . . . he found himself (hic sunt lennones!) at pointblank range blinking down the barrel

It was used by ancient Roman medieval cartographers to mark unknown potentially dangerous territories on maps  TERRORtories if I may    You may    I did    You did   Signifies the absence of human knowledge or control in those areas

    Thas interesting as hell

Yah

Is tha where you wherewent when tha twelvegauge doublebarrel shotgun was leveled in your face One trigger pulled    Then the second    I thought you wereWEwere gonna get it with the second  the first foreplay

You  me    both

                   I wasnt hic sunt lennones here be lions I was    If I may    Please    We were This is how people die    Yah    We didnt attack him we waltzed out of there    WE did ya miss the .thirtyeight in his belt    Wha    Yadid    Idid    Yah the shotgun provocation selfdefence    FUCK    Fuckright    Im happy we waltzed    For guysgals who don danceYah    Yah

    The things tha shoudve killed us

We got nine livesfigure  threetwo more before BINGO!  

1111,  Saturday,  29  3. 25

https://www.worldhistory.org/Benvenuto_Cellini/

they were talking

                       distracted

he was having trouble listening to her  her angst bubblingfrothy    exercised

                                                                        Kiddo

he interruptedwished they were face to face rather on the phone

she croaked What? stunned by his abruptness

Excuse me  donmean to be rude

No.  Not rude.

                 I was takin’ to the jets.

he smiled distantly  wryly   liked she copped some of his speech

                                                             I got a hot one for ya

A reprieve?

   No   Theres no reprieve for tha

                                    Tha was cruel   Grotesque

Deliberate.

No doubt

             Showin their true colours

   What?

Ya sitting down

I can.

You should

I hate when you say that.

 

   Down.

              What’s hot?

Theyre not hers

she swallowed Not.    Hers.

No   Too muchfar  far    too much

   How?

You saw  you held Mom

Yes.

These are more than Mom

 

                                  A portion is supposed taken

 

 

Are you okay

 

   a sob  I can’t talk now.

Im sorry  Call me when you can I love you

Love you bye.

           hungup

disembarking    took a sip of coffee  cold

                                            he had no idea how long he was sitting there

dead phone in his hand

stood

placed it in its cradle

                          he crossed the kitchen to the sink and dumped the coffee turned went to the liquor cabinet behind him and poured the coffee cup full of whiskey took a huge eyewatering gulp   he returned to the dinette chair sat set the cup on the tableheld it between his fingers and looked out the window at nothing in particular

he couldnt see anything outside the inside of his head

1022,  Thursday,  6  3. 25

1007,  Saturday,  29  3. 25

Dark Sorrow Ambient Music  Lost  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s4IXvD-3NFM&t=1036s

Assembly   by Natasha Brown

                                   her character asks on page 21 early yet Did I prefer this to sleeping alone?

shes a young woman

he turned the question on himself

                                    because

her character didnt seem satisfiedhed only just met her they hadnt spent sufficient time together

he was reading

                   an interloper   vagrant

voyeur

           no bullshit opts please  spectator observer viewer onlooker    watcher 

watcher

                  fuckin voyeursby any other name would smell as sweet 

Bill stoodup  offended

Sit downsit  your ass  down

                                Ya coined itI give you credit  but ya don get a say in wha climate circumstance situation youre words are used

Out of your mouth

Onto a page inked with a quill

Print set

They don belong to you anymore

However forever   youll be the Author

                                          The Authority

Did she or he prefer this to sleeping alone

he will read on

hell write on

   maybe by the end of her book theyll know the answer

1705,  reggaefriday,  28  3. 25

0928,  Saturday,  29  3. 25

Stephen Stills  Love the One You’re With   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cZyj6GECjZ0