if he came home

                         Wha

    I came home

he wouldnt recognise shit

at best whenever he returned was cursory

                                              places hed want to visit dont exist   demolished

an incentive

                sit too long in one place and shitll catchup to you

    was he running

no

       didnt like the sense of being pursued

    thad be a mistake

 

Mistake?

Jah 

A mistake.

               What do you mean?

A mistake

    Asking. What do you mean?

 

I do not forgive mistakes

What’s that mean?

    Wha I said

 

You threatening?

Ya stupid

 

    You are.

I am

 

Threatening?

Whaever it takes

                       Im not one to be fucked with

 

    Or else.

Jah

 

Threatenin . .

. . Not you

                   Youre not the kind

So what are you talkin’ abou . .

. . Dead

What do you mean dead?

 

 

 

What do you mean?

 

    Dead

You kill anything

A deer

            In Wyoming

    Howd tha make you feel

I didnt like it.

No

         Yadidnt

Was a once upon a time lark

                                              Took a beings life

Eat it

 

They were going to put it up. I was leaving, returning home.

Departed without a taste of your labour

    They let me shoot first.

I don care

               You didnt eat

 

    No

 

Why woud you understand a threat

    I wouldn’t.

No you woudnt

                      Best you not think   wha my threat entailed

    Were from different beginnings

                                         Yours is a swish

You really havent hurt someone  hard

You have?

 

 

2304,  Sunday,  7  6. 26

nostos

          homecoming   or return 

                                  not

a particularly attractive looking word

                                          But no fishhooks

Six letters long Please

                           Its not about home I know a lot about home since Im the only one of my family who left it

You were going to leave it

Jah

       Maybe if it werent a metropolis  I coud have considered staying

                                                                              But it didnt please me

An my epiphany  my ambition early  as Ive learnedmost have no idea when they realised their life was theirs  thathey werent alive to please others

    Selfishness

Jah

         Happiness

We provide our happiness   Not a job left to anyone other than ourselves

Selfish

Ive already agreed

                      Nostos  This is not home

How can you say tha

                         How long have you lived here

Since last century

You an youre freakin century

Drags history forward

                         More necessary now than ever

But to your point  Its the longest Ive ever remained in one place same place  Place

                                                                                           Place is not home

Im not surrounded by or in the midst of family

Truth be known

Nor woud I want to be

Im too solitary too consumed with the tidescurrents seething seizing me  Too occupied to cease to be occupied with or by others

 

    Why

Because   a storyteller tha  tha I am seen by others  my purposelaughs bitterly  is to entertain humour them

Hence

        Your darkyour  black humour

    Entertaining them . .

. . You insultem

An they don   know tha I am

                                   They assume family They assume friends   Acquaintances

    Acquaintances

Acquaintances

 

No nostos

    No

1446,  Sunday,  7  6. 26

https://stanforddaily.com/2017/04/28/nostos-and-nostalgia/

band of bros

Kids Whardyahs go

                       they disappeared

he didnt know their hidinspots  he wouldnt go lookin for them

                                                                  Breakfast  Time to eat

Kids

    three noshows

took their wetfood plates out to the three ferals who werent spooked by peacock cries

                                                                                          which captured his imagination

threefour weeks ago a male showed

this morning a male and female

                                      what the hell

eerie cries

           imagined walking on a pitchblack night an having either/or go off twenty feet away hed shit himself

         a razorsharp hot spike race from his brain to his anus bombs away

now

       given the statusdesire for white masculinity

those cunts would disown himthe load in his pants

                                                      they wouldnt have flinch  HORSE SHIT

anything he did was masculine

                                      evenif shitting himself

theyd shit but lie about it

                              SO

                            VERY

                           WHITE

                              &

                           MACHO

                                     https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yxxj73JCV4Q

    machismo

                    Isnt tha Mexican Spanish white brothers?

he has no white brothers

                            no band of bros

0827,  Sunday,  7  6. 26

1327,  Sunday

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YK1aj39y55k

Donnockme for stumbling over my words my minds an onslaught Im just tryin to keep up woudnt be surprised if sentences presented out of order I have to rearrange reorientreorderem to make not only sense to you but me

                Its one of those days

Leapfrogging threefour lilypads

                                 What did you say?   Lilypads   No, prior.   Leapfroggin   Leap frogging? Jah   Thought you said leapfuckin . .

. . No   No mumbled  Leapfrogging

                                          Leapfroggin threefour lilypads cuz first two occurred seamlessly sensiblyreasonablyrationally viewed them as I flew over the tops ofem arriving at meatier pointsportions which obviously Im more excited anxious to be at

    Jumble sentenc . .

. . Not impossibledone it tryin to get toimpatient the resolution resolve   ha  end

                                                                                      At least to the end of the paragraph

Which to say  tha particular thought

                                            Because obviously  its holdinup other thoughts beggin to be forwardedfomented  Argued

Discussed

                  Possibly

Disgusting

To your particularto your  more prude nature

                                                              Industry

You’ve mentioned, a show you’re watching.

Jah

        Chick broke through to the other side

    The other side?

Appealing

              Her characters finally appealed entirely to me

How . entirely?

She sittin in a booth at a nightyclub an put this guys hand between her legs Feel that? he cant speak she pulls his hand away Now, I’m going to the bathroom, takin’ off my panties, bringing them back to you, stuff them in your pocket, and you’re gonna text me a photo of you wearing them on your face.

                                                                                                  I mean

I fell in love with her the character

Stood up from my chair said Damn right kiddo

                                                       My kind of gal

 

    I’ve no idea what to say.

Nobodys askin

2237,  Thursday,  4  6. 26

1114,  Sunday,  7  6. 26