his hands felt like clay
no
fine manipulations
they hadnt felt like that since he
was a boy uncoordinated using fat pencils as he learned to print in Elementary
school
the broken glass in his wrists
not
since he punched redhead Timothy(never Tim) Gardner in the face and broke his
wrist
Timothy was a fat kid a bully a couple of years older than him when he
stepped in for his friend Bobby who was afflicted at birth with polio and who wasnt
a threat to anyone Ever a sitting
duck for his visible infirmities
he broke Timothys jaw
his utterly absent parents Timothy was the youngest of four clods threatened to sue
but when several teachers who
were on the playground late to breaking them up slower than he reacting to
Timothys provocation when they attested to what they saw and Bobbys torn shirt
his pants ripped at the knees his knees bloodied by the graveled blacktop
their
silence was cinched
he wasnt a masochist
although he loved contact sports
a small boy the bigger kids made
a point of punishing him but marveled they couldnt make
him give up and that he excelled(running for his life)
maybe he was
but when he healed from this
transgression this sorted inflammation he had a sneaking suspicion he was going
to miss the glass-pain
it was a strange thought to
confess
he was a thoughtful boy
he had ample time to be thoughtful
all the time he convalesced from broken bones and other batteries
his parents pleaded Look before
you leap
he retaliated he never had time
to consider leaping or not
his leaps were demanded
not leaping meant someone else
often lesser than he were going to pay the price through no fault of their own
things then turned on the avarice
of bigger kids who fervently felt their due and were going to get away scot-free
with their shit
he was there to make sure they wouldnt
he exposed at the cost of their brazen
attacks someone who dared to stand up to them and they inadvertently fixed and became
symbols to him of authority who thought nothing of using their perceived power
to make others cower
for every action there was a
reaction
chemistry taught him that
physics taught him that
and despite never being very good
at either class he did inculcate their lesson
his family doctor urged him that he
was smarter than that(where his parents “failed”) but reconsidered when he told
him I only did what was right Youre not trying to tell me Im wrong
No Just his
doctor said
Just more broken bones and wounds
he asked
No Just
under his breath his
doctor muttered Altruistic
it didnt sound like his doctor
had any medicine to give him to cure it
1303, Monday,
8 8. 16
