Osip Mandelstam 

                    Only in Russia is poetry respected, it gets people killed.

the Warsaw Pole died in a Russian gulag of cold and hunger in 1938  realising the prophesy he scratched on paper

he wrote Stone: 24

                     Leaves scarcely breathing /in the black breeze; /the flickering swallow/draws circles in the dusk.

In my loving/dying heart/a twilight is coming,/a last ray, gently reproaching./

And over the evening forest/the bronze moon climbs to it place./

Why has the music stopped?/

Why is there such silence?

silence



happiness depravity  can be found in the warm folds of silence

where was his drunken Irish college professor to elucidatenot that he was necessary he was a lark informative  he was his favoured client while he sold hashishbedding his skinny blonde hookup (and her dark voluptuous sister who loved givin an gettin it  a slave to her cunt)

skinny said You smell funny . . though it smells familiar.

he tried to remember to wash his face after bedding her sistertho he was reticent he liked to lick his moustacheenjoy her taste again and again  he knew all things in lifeanyones life were transitory

                                                                            an that was pronouncedexaggerated
given the pushher she dealt with

they met once

he thought he was a cunt

he wasnt gonna say No to the price per gram she gave himno fuckin way she didnt see the business end her emotions all caughtup between her legs

he hopedmebbe the cunt might suffer an unfortunate accident

shotgunned in the faceleft floating off Key Biscayne near Nixons place didnt make him unhappy Fuck It was only hash

People died over hash?

good lesson to learn

Fuck greed

Fuck capitalists

1414,  Sunday,  31  3. 19

Steppenwolf  The Pusher  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3XqyGoE2Q4Y

he was drinking his way through a bad tooth a filling blew up if he went to see a dentist hed have to lay hundreds down

he held a bottle of Jameson

                             his tooth barkedNO he needed something more than Irishsomething closer to home Tennessee  Kentucky  something rawer

                                           he wished his cousin Carolyns husband Gene was still alive he distilled an awesome white lightning  unfortunately Gene slipped and fell backwards into a huge mill saw he was split like a chicken top of his head to his anus  fuckin horrible 

Gene was the familys first cremation crazy Catholics however there was no question that Gene couldnt have an open coffin

         itd looked like a butchers shop

the tooth hurt wailed

he took a lesson from his girlfriend

                                     If you can hang nerves die 

it wasnt like she challenged him 

her Indian background was more animalistic  naturalistic

he was a buffalo his totem  his tooth was a long way from his heart

                                                                          besides
he had issues with human beings big fucking brains always thinking they knew better

                                                                                            besides
cheaper routes to anesthetise existed

cheaper chemicals

less refined chemicals that wouldnt rave in his system 

chemicals he could kickdeny addiction a-dick-tion

                                                    because physicians were inveterate  they piled on the chemical pleasures they were incentivised  First Class Air tickets  out-of-state conferences 5-Star hotels  dinners  liquor  money  money he did say money Better Living Through Chemistry a variant on DuPonts punt  Better Things for Better Living . . Through Chemistry maybe thats where cunt got his capitals it wasnt their lives  they werent painted Day-Glo colours that wasnt true lotsa of collegial malpractise lotsa of homey dosing there wasnt a big difference between street-corner dealers and physicians except docs had coverhad legal pharmaceuticals no gun fights to hold turf
  

                                                                                                     thatd be something

an Old West shoot-out in a glassy Hi-Rise not that docs would shoot-it-out  theyd have gunnersthey werent stupid or gun-savvy

no matter ones colour theres always niggas wanting to handle 12-gauge shoties

maybe he had drank too much

                                   tooth?       he couldnt feel his face

1358,  Reggae Friday,  29  3. 19

Lloyd Banks  Til the End (feat. Nate Dogg)  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7TQKsZo2cGM 

gunners  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T4mGYNiEBjU

Lloyd Banks  South Side Story  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MLXrGJg-LBQ