the blacker the berry 

                      an old folk saying the blacker the berry, the sweeter the juice  title of a satire by Mr Wallace Thurman 

          his character Emma Lou Morgan internalises biases against dark-complexioned people

but we don have to internalise bias and prejudice against black people 

America hangs it out in the open like dirty laundry for anyone who cares to look can see

                                                                                             belies code 

                                                                                                           which they

white supremacists believe is clever 

                                       playing footsie with plausible deniability  euphemistic innuendo facetious

probably best we stop with code whitey has trouble with multisyllable words gets tonguetiedconfused Whadya say? better talk like monkeys Ooh ooh awh awh stand flatfootedleaning on knuckles 

                                                                                       Imagine that! paints the same picture they paint of black people which is utterly correct   were human beings

the provocation was Karine Jean-Pierres first White House press briefing an elegant smart young woman her black skin in contrast with her lemonyellow dress was breathtaking

he was sure manymany people were upset

                                              she certainly doesnt talk like former

1651,  Day-between-Two-Ts,  18  5. 22

340preferred,  Monday,  23  5. 22

Kendrick Lamar  The Blacker the Berry  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ghv-qwwmG6M 

former speaks like an 8-year old  https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/us-politics/trump-language-level-speaking-skills-age-eight-year-old-vocabulary-analysis-a8149926.html

  . . fresh green grass . . where do the children play . . . 

                                                             he mused it found its way 

he had lost the little handcarved bone buffalo his girlfriendbefore they were girlfriendboyfriend thoughtfully gave him in 2008completely surprising him  he didnt realise she understood his fondness for buffalo  for bones   their artistry 

they had to meet a second timemonths apart before they coalescedcaught fire  

as abysmal their first meeting was was as enchanting their second     

it blew their minds

he had carried the buffalo with him every day since

 

it fell from a holesonofabitch in a pocket of his athletic shorts  Sonofabitch       

returned homerealising he had he called her immediately

they played phonetag

finally they spoke early eveningfor which he was grateful the sun hadnt set he knew telling her in the dark would be hard on him 

             The Hemingway line whawas it  YesThe Sun Also Rises  It is awfully easy to be hard-boiled about everything in the daytime, but at night it is another thing.  it stuck with himhed never lose that  there was only one hole big enough to steal it from him

Are you okay? Your messages made me nervous.

Im sorry to worry you I had to tell you I . . I coudnt leave it to a message

he confessed

   

       he concluded  Im depressed Ive lost too many people I love as you know  an the little buffalo consoled me

I know that sounds nuts but its true  hed become a talisman  helped fortify me when I was unable to reach you

I am sorry.

Thank you

          Thank you for sharing giving him to me   He is irreplaceable

 

slowlyslowly slowly  he retraced his walkingreading steps

                                                                he couldnt say how many driedyellow broken leaves and bits of trash paper looked like him 

he found two dimes three pennies two carbusted dead young squirrels

suntime,  Sunday,  22  5. 22

1143,  Monday,  23  5. 22

Cat Stevens  Where Do the Children Play?  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aPHawByQeQo 

Man ohman . . you’re pitiful.

I didnt share with you for you to condemn me

Condem . .

. . Call me pitiful Yare takin your soullessness to a hole new level  h-o-l-e

 

It shouldn’t be that big a deal.

Whaif ya lost your wedding ring

kneejerk You can’t compare the two.

I made the comparison

                        An making it yaoughta be able to understand  if ya took a breath if ya stood in my shoesmy moccasins in my fuckin stocking feet

                                          You that devoid of consideration empathy

No.  But it’s just a thing.

You didnt answer my question

Your question?

        he chirped like a cricket to make his point was it possible he was that dense

Oh . . yeah . wedding ring . .

. . If you had a fondness for your wedding ring or your wife or your relationship  Or are they backburner shit in your life

Talk about considera . .

. . You provoked me

                      Just a thing

No.   A wedding ring is different.

It isnt different its symbolic Ya don get to deliberate whais or isnt for me Ya can expect it to be flung back in your face brother

You don't see the difference?

  I made the comparison

                             Yathink I made it halfassed

Halfassed?you said it not me.

                                 Yes.

You ought to know me better Maybe if I knocked you down a couple times youd better understand me

he sniffed as if he was contemplating a challenge

figured he better piss on that

                              My bloods up Youll have to tell me if you see boids or stars circling your head when you come to  regain consciousness   As upset as I am I might knock ya into tomorrow

                                                                                         Hope you have no plans today

Are you threatening me?

Fact not a threat a bluff I don do either which you know if you know me as well as you ought to as I know you

Yare not stupid

Should I take that as a compliment?

Better a compliment than an icebag for your head steak for your eye

I’m not stupid.

                If I lost my wedding ring I’d be very upset.

Thank you thank you Thank you for the acknowledgment

                                                               Im telling you it hurts that bad A thing is a thing is a thing isnt always a thing Shakespeare

Don be so quick to the trouble

Be considerate when someone tells you it is a matter of the heart

                                                                      Hearts don think  they are

Ill concede I am pitifully romantic  nostalgic

2053,  Sunday,  22  5. 22

1309,  Monday,  23  5. 22

Cat Stevens  Sitting  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQ8_qVPyh3c

double aught double aughtcouldnt remember the last time he saw it

would have been New Years if he had a digital clockhe didnt

                                                                 cautiously he provided all things digitalconvenient wide berth particular to avoid its rash infection   defection

she wrinkled her nosesomething smell bad What are you trying to prove, going off the reservation? 

                                                                                                      Reservation  I thought better of you You didnt think that through before ya opened your mouth didya 

                                                                                    They wereare prisons forced indoctrination forced God forced culture enforced deprivation  places where human beings wereare denatured

her face hovered a mixupmishmash of distaste anger upset   they thought they were friends 

I see yes yes   Its understandable you believe yare due your disgust that was scathing but  but that was my intention Im not sure wha your intention was  You know me better than most

I’m sorry, you can be so wearisom . .

. . Tiresome too 

                  But you know that  No need for sorry 

I have known that.

Not nothing new  Seems Ive outrun your tolerance patience  yare frustrated 

                                                                                   Perhaps I don know perhaps ya thought you coud change me A projectmake me better remake me in your image   Yacant

 

   double aught double aught

             00:00

     an end or a beginning

WednesdayThursday,  18,19  5. 22

1044,  Sunday,  22  5. 22

Jewel  Do You  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0EPMOU--rxM

there are celebritieseven today an there were celebrities

some celebritiesHA he didnt follow popular culturewasnt connected wasnt hampered or antagonised   influenced 

media points fingers at the internet  its not  Yutzes   its smartphone internet access  social media  apps  socalled conveniences their inherent downside darkside  seemed queer not to admitted thatqueer as FOX operating inside America identifing the enemy within projecting  they are not free press deserving Constitutional rights or protection  agenda  greed  propaganda  antidemocratic  the National Association of Radio and Television Broadcasters of the 50s wouldnt confer its seal to FOX  “(2b) In developing programs to foster and promote the commonly America hasnt common sense any longer  commonly accepted moral, social, and ethical ideals characteristic of American life.”  to be sure Jim Crow was rife then  but beyond later Supreme Courts ruled formed precedents to provide and protect human beings civil rights  albeit it now slippingaway wallowed in the muck and miretrench of ideology  unhinged from justice or truth  stripping the scales from Themis maybe forgetting she holds a lethal broadsword in her other hand

Where ya going with this  asked one of his interiorsinterrogators

Forgive me  A Sunday morning rant  Better than church

                                                           Thanks for swinging in on a vine Tarzan

 

Just trying to keep the narrativeyour point going forward

I understand

             Celebrities  I don follow them today find them unworthy the exception they believe theyre due  When I think of celebrities the Golden Age of Hollywoodyes I understand it wasnt truly golden it was flawed  but throwup Monroe Cooper Capra Grant nevermind  simple assessment  fake celebritieslike fake tits  in a word Kardashians

Jimmy Stewart didnt make a sextape

                                      OHbrutha  interior howled

 

 Not badhuh    Just aint authentic

337preferred,  ReggaeFriday,  20  5. 22

1227,  Sunday,  22  5. 22

Television Code  http://historymatters.gmu.edu/d/6558/ 

good thing he went back over editedreworked his pieces before publishing them

   was always a struggle between his eyes an brain 

his brain imposed its will

his eyes HEYA I think ya missed this

I miss nothing

patiently I think ya missed this Yawanna look again pleease it killed eyes to plead they knew what they saw  

his brain sighed itd humour eyes  Where came out more curt than it meant I apologise  excuse me

I accept Halfway down the page after CHRIST  Yasee 

out loud by rote his brain read CHRIST he wiped tears out of his eyes   Thawas hilarious

  No

      Thas not how it reads Read it againREAD the words as they appear

AGAIN  CHRIST brain was getting agitated  he wiped tears

NO  AGAIN

miffedCHRIST   CHRIST he wiped teats out of his eyes   Thawas hilarious 

Teats  Yah

            Dig the imagery nodoubt but thas not whaya meant  is it

brain picked up crow in its finger ate feathers bones anall

                                                              with its mouth full I wuz wong yawah  Awh correct

cleared its throat again  I apologise

Thank you banner day brain  extracted two apologises in one day

                                                                      Were happy to help  Together we try to expresssay  exactly whawe mean

1022,  Saturday,  21  5. 22

Which one ofya said that

there were snickers

none said

from where he was it was like looking into an intimate darkened theater from stage

he stood out like a sore thumb

they were fluidmerged played separately were protagonists antagonists played in cliques kept him on his toes  they were madeup of his stuff privy to his every thought conscious or unconscious asleep dreaming  confidantes eyes at keyholes  private dicks 

                        hot on his hypnopompic hypnagogic states coming out going in

Anyone

more snickers

Nahgonnasay

from somewhere Whaya hear

Who said that

snickers

           Whadya hear Daddy-O  voice came from the other side

his eyes were beginning to grow accustom to the dark night vision occurring

                                                       FLASH character upfront center hit him between the eyes with a Maglite beam

                                         vision destroyed

 humble  Clever

   Gettin nosey   She was hot   Was digging your attention   Yawere digging hers voices from herethere

Ya didnt have to be crude

Wasnt crude

Ya thought first

We agreed chimed in

she smelled like sweetvanilla spongecake  

Queque man

Ya thought  Whell shit Id like to get some of that

Yah but I didnt think I bet her pussy smells and tastes like spongecake

Just put a fine point on her  

Wouldnt it

Thinkbout it

Be honest

they knew he couldnt lie

1946,  Twosday,  17  5. 22

353preferred,  Saturday,  21  5. 22

Nah no thank you

I got no problem, took it yesterday, I don’t have to go deep to find it.

Yasaid you went out yesterdayexpressly to shoot Tahoe with your brandspankingnew iPhone superior camera

I did, but those were landscapes, birds . .

. . Boids

Boids.

        But they're decidedly differen . .

. . Please don

No trouble, I’ll text it so you can see.

I donwanna see

I dropped a beer can beside it for scale.

No really No thank you

Ya gotta to see.

                 If I had to see you can see.

Please no

Ya gotta see. 

                Ill text it later

he had to get him off point 

                            Yashoud have been with me for sushi last night Goodlookin gal who served me had a blouse a sheer light floral pattern  it was cinched by a single hold between her breasts  she was braless  it tastefully revealed and didnt parked under her pleasant smile an dimples   Devastating

                                                                                     I appreciated her

I would have too.

No  no ya woudntve Im tellinya so you can imagine had you been with me ya woudve ogled

Ogled? I wouldn’t have.

Ya woud have  Ya lack subtlety

I do not.

Your looks get lostsense of time goes out the window

That’s not true.

Your subjective acuity is tremendous  utterly lack objectivity

                                                                 Yawoud have undressed her slowly not seen through her clothingtakes a particular eye a practised eye  you havent my eye timing  or are you discreet

You’re wrong. 

   Friend  Im tellinya honestly  for your own good

You don’t know what you’re talking about.

                                             But never mind I gotta go Having dinner with friends who happen to be up here too.

Enjoy

Will do.

 

 

that evening his cellphone binged

casually he opened a textfurtherest thing from his mind  was watching Arsenic and Old Lace 

the knucklehead remembered he rarely did

                                             sent him the scaled bear shit by the shed

a really healthy bear

1044,  Monday,  16  5. 22

225preferred,  Saturday,  21  5. 22

conversation heeled 

 he looked at him

                  didnt say

buddy returned his look 

                         he didnt say either

went without saying

he cracked firstslapped his kneestarted laughing blubbered Fuckin hoot

buddy joined in slapped his knee but missed how doya fuckin miss a knee that turned up the volume didnt miss on purpose he wasnt a funny man

CHRIST he wiped tears out of his eyes  Thawas hilarious

                                                              Yare not one for physical humour Not a Three Stooges sir

Com’on, give me a break, I’m high.

Hiya Knees still connected to the shinbone yaremember dem bones dem bones 

                                                                                     he startedup looseygoosey dancing prancing on the deck legs an arms agoing head flopping side to side Da footbones connected to the  anklebone  anklebones connected to the  shinbone comon shake dem bones shinbones connected to the kneebone kneebones connected to the hipbone comon shake dem skeletonbones

                                                                 laughter blustered out of his mouth

he was high too 

 hahainfection spread  buddy began laughing again too

 

    finally  flashfire quieted quelled

Whoooo too much

Too much, too much, might suppose we’re pretty funny . .

. . We might think we are  

                             Whoooo

So ah . . what were we laughing about?

Yawanna startup that train again

Nah. I’m serious. 

                   What was that about?  

Truly

Yeah, truly.

he wiped tears out of his eyes

                                 Pregnant our pregnant pauses coinciding the stares leaving things naked standing out in a breeze not sayingcuz   nothing we coud woud top silence  left to our own devises our separate machinations imaginations   sniff

Yeah yeah. his expression souredpuzzled    I don’t remember.

Me neither laughter began to percolate 

                                              Im high

  

1043,  Monday,  16  5. 22

1038,  Saturday,  21  5. 22

Michael Stanley  Let’s Get the Show on the Road  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jlz_dLcYPQw

According to my Maw there wasnt a woman good enough for me out there  he caught the look flash in her face no disguising that 

                 Im tellinya  thaswha she said

Your mother actually said that, no hyperbole?

No My Maw was a prude an she loved to tell people wha to dohow she believed was unimpeachable                                                                                                                              A stalwart fivetwo

little dogbitch attitude

Did you just call your Mom a bitch?

On more than one occasionusually to her face preferred telling her to her face if I coud

You love your mother?

  Deeply She an my old man are my oldest friends I rarely sought their counselasked them bout things I intended to do  but if they guessedsolicited Id hear them out

Did they ever change your mind?

No Hard to change my mind  Ive always researched referenced been objective sought facts  assembled what was true

      Had doozies of arguments with myself

What might your Mom have thought of me?

Youve slept with me  Yare a slut

her voice heavy suddenlyhoarse Would she have called me a slut?

Push came to shove

                     Otherwise shed say She’s one of those girls.

Those girls?

Gold digger

You got gold? 

Got Milk commercial sounded in his head No gold

DAMN.

Swung an missedhuh

Here was hoping.

Yarefunny tickle my funny bone . .

. . Among other bon . .

. . Play me like a xylophone

  Wood?

Yare so keen baby

I think if I wasn’t we wouldn’t be having this conversation.

Keen an perceptive

Well, I am sorry I won’t have the opportunity to meet her . . she did very good by you, raised you right.

She did

         I think the very best thing she did for me was teaching me how to cook

Why is that?

Like most things she taught us the crux was to be selfsufficient

                                                                   Me and my siblings are dependable

She was a good mother.

In that regards second to none

                                Though flawed  but human beings are   Wha makes us human

Nobody’s perfect.

Fewer an fewer try

Could you say the best thing she taught you?

Yes

That was quicker than I thought.

I didnt have to thinkreflex

You’re killing me . can’t wait to hear.

She taught me that the quickest way to a womans heart was through her stomach

She did not.

              laughed gayly

I like to think she did thaswha she meant

What she meant?

  Yes  Otherwise Id imagine she meant to put women off because I was too independent  woudnt need them

She misplaced that I might want a woman

Donforget  I said she was a prude

1927,  Twosday,  17  5. 22

1258,  ReggaeFriday,  20  5. 22

Beatles  Why Don’t We Do It In the Road  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p4E6KtQg_z0

love it or leave it

                  fingers crossed     STAY PUT

he remembered it from Namfreaked America  the 60s fingers pointed at him drafted refused to fight for Our country

domino theory 

             he was no idiot sided with Ali

Americans CPAC Conservative Political Action Committee  in Hungary leaning at Orbans knee

                                                                                                    hard ons

if they were possessed to go they ought to stay

hed encourage them to remain  take a bite of the apple  digest it there

otherwise they were returningfortified with antidemocratic imports that Customs couldnt confiscate 

  STAY

        he wouldnt miss em

646preferred,  Thursday,  19  5. 22

1137,  ReggaeFriday,  20  5. 22

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2022/may/18/cpac-conference-budapest-hungary-viktor-orban-speaker  

https://www.politico.com/news/magazine/2022/02/01/tucker-carlson-hungary-orban-00004149

https://www.motherjones.com/politics/2019/07/love-it-or-leave-it-has-a-racist-history-a-lot-of-americas-language-does/