when he had the occasion to trip down memory lane he astonished himself by how well he remembered his aunts and uncles and elderly cousins -- some so much older than he that he called them aunt and uncle out of respect – dear older family friends were also aunt and uncle out of respect – Instructed?  Yah  but with respect intended

they treated him with respect

family community seemed to mean more when he was a boy  tight-knit   his uncles went to war with strangers at their backs had theirs

they were intimates

they cared for each other

they retained their friendships after the war

                                              many were his uncles their wives his aunts

he didnt cross themthey didnt cross him

maybe when he was older he might have crossed themhe was accused of having strange ideas if they hadnt died but the way they treated each other felt like love

he felt safealways safe cared for nurtured even if he was denied what he wantedwhat he cleverly angled for or so he thought

he was probably obvious

                           they saw it they rebuked him though teased him with smiles and laughter gay winks hugs and kisses

usually he immediately forgot his disappointment 

he supposed he didnt need what he wanted

which isnt to say he didnt try again

he went about it from a different angle

                                          theres more than one way to skin a cat

he had cats now  never thought to skin one

from his older or elderly aunts and uncles he rarely got what he wanted no matter the angles he played

they must have talked among themselves and spread the word he was stymied one after the other

they acknowledged him

then they kindly shot him down

he learned to accept No learned to be refused he accepted it and moved on

thinking about it now it was a good way to learn to deal with rejection  take No because No meant No

hed never be a prick salesman 

he watched some of his cousins try tantrums not a wise angle or good look  was a great way to earn a crack on the ass then sat to the side and told to think about how they acted

he didnt remember ever throwing one 

his relativeshis aunts and uncles  as readily as they loved him they were as ready to spin him around and crack him too

    spare the rod spoil the child  no spoiled children in his family and extended family heaping helpings of punishment were as acceptable as the bouts of joyous laughter and playful ribbing

one didnt cross these people 

they knew shit from Shinola        

when he found time and slipped softly into reflection and memory their faces returned

often suspended in these moments he must have seemed catatonic to anyone who came upon him

theyd physically have to touch himnudge him to arouse him from his reverie

he got lost as easily in them as he did in his dreams

reality sucks  in a nice way

 0507,  Twosday,  18  2. 20

1140,  Reggae Friday,  21  8. 20

Beatles  Strawberry Fields Forever  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=44GB53rnI3c 

Penny Lane  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oRJ2a-z5SI4