they viedantagonised each other over the difference between his ability to remember dreams  bros inability

Ifya paid attention

They’re dreams.

Motherfucker More than dreams

                                   Theyre confirmations messengers

Yacant remember because you minimise them cut their legs from out underem

I haven’t.

Remember last nights

No.

Crippledem

             I had three but as Ive said because I sleep intermittently the wake betweenem are commercial breaks that allow me to keepem  remember

You sleeping through the night

I wake to urinate.

Dreams go byebye

Hell if I know.

                    So what’d you dream?

Visual An attractive woman sayingrepeating Im not a good girl Im not a good girl

Conviction

    visualising  She wasnt

I’m not.

No

     Yah

Who says that?

She did Although I knewdug her backstory

                                               Knowing provided context to her gleeful words

And the story?

   No

You’ll admit to me she wasn’t a good girl, but won’t spill the beans?

No

    That’s unguyish.

he humoured himself  Is tha a word

Fuck you.

           You’re constantly making up words. I’m not allowed?

Havent

Unguyish.  Have.

                    Take that.

Taken

    So you’re really not going to say?

No

face fell That’s shit.

her first facial

she handed him her phone

                              Take a picture I wannasee.

Share

Yeah.

Awright

she smiled awfully huge

1040,  Monday,  30  9. 24

2244,  Monday

You’re so fuckin' weird.

Probably

    You don’t take exception?

Nah

       I understand why youre saying so

Because you’re a freak. I’ve not met anyone like you.

You havent

              Theres a backstory

An no sense tryin to offend me cuzaint happenin old sticks an stones line applies

That’s another thing.

                       You don’t care what anybody thinks of you.

No Wha I think of me is more important than people who don know me from Adam

                                                                                         Anya know wha I saybout tha

Fuckem.

Right on brother right on

Your backstory?

My Maws responsible

You’re hanging your mother out to dry?

I am

       A kid Going out for football high school double practises summer you remember

Don’t remind me.

Right on

          Had water breaks All the other guys were suckinup Gatorade I had a gallon jug of water  Went home

Maw think you could pickup some Gatorade for me pleaseNo.

                                                                 Thafast no  I don even think she looked at me

All the other guys their mothers fathers parents are picking it up for them

So what are you telling me?

    Tellin you

                    Im not tellinya anything  Im asking if you would please

Which you know the answer to.

Then she says

                  You want to be like everybody else?

Everybody else

                   I almost puked No

End of conversation

Soyah Im hang tha on my Maw

1040,  Monday,  30  9. 24

329 preferred to 1529,  Monday

airport

not one in particular

an airport

within was a stumbling man splayed foot Size14s think Bozo the Clown plaidshirted dotard  lean heavily on tard

another with a prodigious gutENORMOUS belly fleshy standingsulking before a cooler of prepackaged foodstepping side to side without regard for others who were aware he was oblivious and stepped aside or back accommodate him  all his failed diets

              how his thin black suspenders didnt snap an take out someones eye  anyet returned from his trip more than two weeks now hes still amused when he rememberswhen his mindseye paints the fat man When were the triplets due

he was humoured

also irritated

               handsfree new parents

hed had his  three

                     was blessed said without religious intent with girls who were born old souls good thing they grewup together he did his levelbest so his wife didnt raise four

he acquitted himself nicely

                             his acquittal eased by the fact that their girls were smart

he was terribly grateful he didnt have to suffer dolt male children as too many of his friends had

must have done his youthful drugs in proper measure or sequence

                                                                       fine accentuating cocktails that didnt damage his DNA as authorities threatened they would

    these new parents

                         they wear their babies like one would wear accessories

roll their luggage  get onboard in the first wave with members of the military and the disabled

   theyll never experience the pleasure of their loved ones meeting them at the gate when they arrive

Thank you Sep11   

0558, 2sday,  17  9. 24

1007,  Monday,   30  9. 24

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=STSkGSTMr9Y

casually

            not good

causally

          cause and effect

Causality

Casualties

               collateral damage

seems acceptable

                     as long as it is not happening to them and theirsTHEN they lose their mind   rightfully so

casualties hurt

                if theyre able to survive  walkaway

but

      nobody walks away from being violatedHEY

                                                      Ive an idea

Whachagot

A woman has to bear a rapists child

Some states

Wha about therapists

Youre breathless

                   The Rapists

Thaswha I said yah

No

    Two different things

Sometimes theyre not

Probable  Ill grant you tha

Thank you

Youre welcome

Whaof them

Theres law

Does the law have them on the hook financially for their bastardstheyre bastards know it sounds harsh an may no longer carry the weight it once did but they arethey are they on the hook while theyre getting three square in confinementif if theyre apprehended tried found guilt

I don know

Donya think yashoud

No

Thas unlike you truthseeker anall

Anall

       Cleverly close

Aint it the truth aint it the truth

Im not looking

                 If I had my druthers every rapists forced baby every incested forced baby ought to be raised financially by the six kowtowing Supreme Court judges

Ooh  Judges

    Ya caught tha

Yes

      Justices

Not to me

           Theyre a kind of rapist court  Fucking the American people

Yah

         Well this was nice

A long conversation 

Youre my shehes heshes

                           Friends Romans countrymen lend me your ear

Mark Antony Shakespeare Julius Caesar

                                            We know because you know

Thanks for saying so Were blowing my mind

Our mind

           Unblowable Though occasionally bulges

Granted  Occasinally

1856,  day-between-2-Ts,  25  9. 24

1222,  Sunday,  29  9. 24

song by White Stripes  Effect and Cause

Unask the question

he flinched

             Is that a word?

Certainly You follow the premise   Undo the asking

Why would I do that?

It may have impressed you  zilch inane to me

                                                  Youre not familiar with Japanese mu nothingness  no thing

I am not a little disconcerting you are.

Wideread Perfect little gems one comes across

                                                  In another sense  why I refuse to answer hypotheticals an . .

. . You should . .

. . Don interrupt

                    Anya ought to know tha by nowya know tha   Don

Then you’re curtailing censoring our conversations.

Youre welcome to play Ill listen I wont have an opinion because wha youre expressing is tha

No opinion.

How can you just not have an opinioneveryone has an opinion?

Theyre a waste of time They  beliefs  of imagined situations conditions tha do not exist  Lets hoe the row keep to things tha exist are factual 

                             Dare I say provable

You often stretchout . . imagine.

Yes

     I do not ask for your opinion

You’re opining.

Imagining

Dreaming

No real world consequences albethey dramatic

Albethey.

           Another not word.

They replaces it A word

                             Again you followed it

he sneered

You don like following me

No.  It irritates me.

0952,  Sunday,  29  9. 24

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZhSdNy1snaU

 

    Whell  whell    well        well   filled with freshwater

                                                                    muttered to himself

mused  never met a gal with that problem

he hadnt known that it was

                                 was yet another Pharma advertising blitz on youtube

“. . . ask your doctor today.” 

why it plied him made no sense

Revaree

he SKIPped it in the allotted 5 seconds but he wasnt going to get those 5 seconds back

youtube took it and would suffer no financial loss for interrupting him

                                                                         his time   day dies  25Sep ’24

never again

like human beings everything living

despicable how drug companies dipped into his life

extracted moments from him

                              SO

what the fuck is Revaree

wasnt curious

                just wanted to know what Pharma thought to gain off him   Ah

                                                                                    Spit on it

vaginal moisturizerHAWK TUAH

                                     two can play that way Ms Welch

read she was finally making some cash off her inadvertent Tiktok interview

                                                                                 unfortunately late to the game

others gamed it 

what they hawked he hadnt a clue

that said

          he was sympathetichad empathy for those with dry arid chasms

he hoped freshwater would return soon 

1856,  day-between-2-Ts,  25  9. 24

1016,  Sunday,  29  9. 24

song by The Who  Love, Reign O’er Me

epiphanies

they came an went

                     he couldnt keep up with them

one would appear

                    a second shove it aside third likewise ARE YOU MESSIN WITH ME  third buttfucked by the fourth

toughass epiphanies

                        but if they couldnt hold their own

why would he mourn em

they piledon

               all he could do was witness see if he could make hide or hair of em

NO

      like tryin to take a solitary frame from a rollin reel

cut your fingers off

he had need of em all

                       Sorry babe   Cant digitally please you

trifecta

          cock tongue fingers  ruined

    What did you do?

I  I tried saving an epiphany

But you have them all the time.

Yesyah

          But it intrigued me  I didnt want to let it get away

    Lost fingers. Got away.

Yah

Fuckin pitiful.

                Fuckin pitiful.

spread her legs

                  Get on it.

she was upset

                 but he still had his tongue

On it

Shaddup.

             Ill let ya know when you can talk.

he really surprised her with an index up the ass

she tried to bolt

his other hand was unmolested

she wasnt going anywhere

    she said she lost her mind

he saw exactly where it landed

                                  Whas it worth

More fucks and sucks and pleasures than you can imagine.

he thought shed have negotiated harder

                                            but  brain vacated

he had the upperhand  despite digits missing

that wasnt an epiphany

2219,  Saturday,  28  9. 24

had been flying

crosscountry

back again

meeting his ride at the curb he got in and said Terminal

bro replied Terminal?

Yah  I still have a hard time with tha

                                        Yad think it woudnt affect me since I only fly once a year

Terminal.

            What’s with that?

Id rather theythe recorded loudspeaker system say   concourse

So you don’t distinguish between the two?

Howso

A terminal is comprised of several concourses.

No  Theyre coequal

I disagree.

Youre right

            Like men an women coequal Theyre not   Women are superior

We’re coequal.

Fuck we are

              Youre living proof men are at a deficit  deficient

I pick you up and you berate me?

Im not berating you brother

                               Plain truth

Whatever.

            What’s your hangup?

Terminal or not coequal

Terminal, Christ.

Whaelse is terminal

What do you mean?

Us

      Were terminal   I really need to be reminded of tha when I fly

                                                                         If all the folks who suffer fear of flying  dig  aerophobia . .

. . Yamade that up.

Did not  Fuckin phobias for every fear

                                          Coprophobia  Fear of shitting  Imagine  Kakorrhaphiophobia Abnormal fear of failure or defeat Cant imagine  Athazagoraphobia intense or irrational fear of being forgotten or of forgetting someone something

Nothing to fear but fear itselfJeez

                                    My point is all those folks who fear flyingmedicate themselves last fuckin thing they want to hear at an airport is  terminal

   You been storing this up for awhile?

Canya tell

            Thanks  I appreciate the ride your ear

0558,  2sday,  17  9. 24

1259,  Saturday,  28  9. 24

   obstinacy

obstinate

   Yah

“But because the violence of my early life when I could put a name to it, even a terrified name, I remember details of it very vividly, as well as the fact that none of it ever affected my habitual (you could say even feline) curiosity, despite my awareness of what the results of such curiosity were likely to be. I, like too many other children in my predicament, had discovered that I possessed one ultimate weapon against abuse: obstinacy . . . Humiliation and obedience, ultimately, were and are more dreadful solutions than resistance, even if the latter results in painful defeat, because in resistance lies self-respect.”

                    Caleb Carr  My Beloved Monster: Masha the Half-Wild Rescue Cat Who Rescued Me

 

he entertained anal

admitted to his daughter he was

                                   Yathink? she responded

Hold on a second

                    Arent you curious how I arrived at my assessment

No.

Really

I’m teasing, of course I am. How?

   I was giving it some thought It occurred to me all these years Ive been very thorough

Very thorough.

                 Though that’s who you are.

Thank you

You’re welcome.

Yes Granular  I enjoy research

Minutiae.

I do

History.

          You constantly drag me through years that precede your explanation, help define your argument.

I do because it is critical to understand tha something has had to come before  thathey create the chain of events which culminate in what I understandbelieve  is the present

Always. Laboriously.

Boringly

   Sometimes.

Perhaps

Not perhaps.

You slay me

              Anywho   I was thinking

Maybe my thoroughness is analness

I am anal

Papa. However you want to describe yourself I’m cool.

Thanks baby

You’re welcome.

 

anal didnt fit

he went back to being thorough

                                  however

while reading Carrs passage it occurred to him that he was that

                                                                     obstinate

stubborn  hardnosed  fight or fight no flight

adored confrontation

provocative

ASSertive

   factual

maddeningly so

circled his wagons

his chainlinks blacksmithed wrought by vigorous blows

 

   obstinate

                 not anal

he had to call his daughter to advise her

2230,  Thursday,  26  9. 24

1134,  Saturday,  28  9. 24

Friday all are reggaefridays

                               hes called it that for years his coinage  went over huge with his family and when they dropped it on others it stuck

how now reggaefriday

                         was an illuminating day once he brokeout of dreaming

which no small feat

leftie

      a female cat

roused himbumped his face with hers  hinted FOOD 

she was followed by the queen october shy firstborn bomb tomboy stood in the doorway FOOD

                                                                                  GET THE MESSAGE

he had for years

                   Awright gang Up an Adam colloquially up and at ‘em time but who likes colloquial  Time to get the show on the road

got his ass out of bed

had to make it first

Grrls bomber  Time to eat

they hustled into the kitchen

waiting outdoors were four ferals too

he was an ample provider

gotta to love pussy to be able to contend with eight

early afternoon 

work complete

he went on a walkread occasionally lifted his head when sensingkeening something may be afoot worthwhile presenting

            sometimes something was butifnot he wasnt one who ever lacked inspiration

shit fireworks went off in his head

never a dull moment

his blue eyes shined

 

in the evening he had a scheduled phone call with a friend

he had a habitwas  haBITCHualised

                                       while they yammered he liked to sip a Lizards Mouth beer

also habit was having a couple tidbits at the ready to share with her  curios

he ran into Dave Dyslexia Dave the Church Caretaker whose name he humourously recalled by the Cheech and Chongs bit  Dave’s Not Here  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dX8lZduI8ac

Dave however was not late to churchwas religious as a boy teenager he could stream psalms backwards

he was utterly unfamiliar with Cheech and Chong

    a tidbit

he picked up a Lizards Mouth nineteenounce can from a small local liquorestore whose attendant he was acquainted with she wore a tightfitting black tshirt emblazoned in elaborate white cursive font MULTITTASKER   across her tits

maybe because she wasnt young wasnt beautiful she could wear it to work

he was fifth in line

no one behind him

Heya

Hi. How are you?

I love your tshirt

her eyes startedshe blushed

No ones commented on it

                                  Youre blushing her rouge brightened

she cleared her throat

                          I’ve worn this on occasion onanoff for two years. You’re the first person whose noticed. Not even my boss has.

Maybe hes not a tit man

                           You might imagine I am her rouge became fiercer 

Threeeightyfine I have exact change

                                       he paid slowly with three  ones  two  three  a  quarter  six  dimes

counted them into her palm without looking up

by the time they completed the transaction her usual countenance was restored

he smiled

           I must say  blush looks good on you

it hustled back

he laughed

             Ill see next reggaefriday babe

A titbit  Whacha got for me

his phonefriend almost dropped hers

1524,  reggaefriday,  27  9. 24

1002,  Saturday,  28  9. 24