its been one helluva April Fools Day 

                                       but he had a sense of humour someone else might have been miserable 

it tickled him

seemed either telemarketers or robocalling had a hard-on for him

his telephone rang and woke him early this morning right in that sweet spot of where it may or may not have been someone calling him with bad news 

                                     Yaknow how those calls come in and make you suck your breath fearfully smack ya in the pit of yer gut

it did make him get out of bed fiftysome degrees windows open cold when yare naked

he didnt rashly take the bait

hed let the machine do its job

it wasnt his machine 

                      when his machine died he was content to not have one his daughters were not they bought him the machine his youngest on her return north from southern California where her sister lived actually stopped at his apartment installed it and recorded the greeting It’s your dime; leave your name, your number, the time and day you called, and we may get back to you.

                                      took the words right out of his mouth 

every machine and being had a job to do

when his daughters voice began there was no hangup just dead air a robocall clever computers those hangups when he could hear the clickthe disconnect a human those were becoming rarer by the day 

                                                                                          or otherwise a blithe message would begin  a blissful recorded human voice or a Ray Bradburyish telephone intelligence learning to speak by mimicry

hed let it mimic his silence 

point being 

            his telephone rang seven times and no one there most recently it rang hangup then rang again no one there

hed been a collector

that was an old trick 

let it ring twice hang up call again BINGO GOTCHA CRUMB 

                                                                  repossessions usually followed those were the days

B & E 

       to B & E or not B & E   if he did the repo there was no question he couldnt count how many he did but his customers failed to understand he had skin in the game because he was the one who rented the furniture to them and upfront he said you begin to have problems you lemme know because if you dont Im repossessing the furniture

it wasnt a line

unfortunately hed seen more shameful expressions than he would have cared to

Just  Be  Honest

if someone was honest hed take the heat from his boss regarding collections

 

then his cellphone began ringing 

four times

people he wanted to talk to were in his phonebook

if an unknown same areacoded number or Private number 

                                                           how did he teach his daughters Suck my cock 

itd been a fun April Fools Day

he couldnt wait to get outside out among people he liked to victimise men  Excuse me man your flys open

 

APRIL FOOLS        

 1213,  Thursday,  1  4. 21

Frank Zappa  Cheepnis  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=etQm3gzjyNw

 

an erratic a boulder erratics boulders were carried by glaciers during successive ice ages and deposited hundreds of miles from their original locations

errare Latin  to wander 

to errare is human

Hanoi Vietnam  a mammogram revealed a spot on Ms. Thien right breast she was asked if she believed rhino horn might help her if it was cancer 

                                I don’t know, but when you think you might die, it can’t hurt to try it.

to errare is human

 

word play he loved it 

                        he came upon it while reading National Geographic  erratics  which were surmised in 1871 by Louis Agassiz a Swiss scientist at Harvard who then popularised the ice age theory of how such boulders came to their odd contexts

he usually walked to his odd contexts and because he walked and read he typically was as surprised as those who were surprised he was in their midst 

                                      they didnt know him he didnt know them  Hello hed say 

that wasnt always true he still said Hello 

                                           he wandered over to Republican Party Headquarters to learn where large parties were being held to view MAGA rallies for Drumpf Drumpf Dumps he affectionately called them he took pleasure in being asked to leave as he made vocal exceptions in real time to the presidents inaccuracies misconceptions and lies that he was perpetrating against themagainst the American people and the world

as he was ousted he inveighed Hes serving the Kool-Aid anyer lappin it up like dogs

directing him out they told him he was being erratic ErraticHA told him he ought to thank his lucky stars that he was only put out and not beaten

Erratic  Sometimes but not this evening

at least he appreciated his word play 

1630,  Friday,  6  3. 20

1101,  Thursday,  1  4. 21

https://www.gdanmitchell.com/2012/10/11/glacial-erratics-near-olmsted-point 

Olmstead Point  92-million-year-old bedrock  Elevation 8418 feet

 

Whacha don know ya don know

 

he ought to take his own advise

 

7                                                                                                                                          5                                                                                                                                             5                                                                                                                                                   2

it was dark 

the numbers were obscured

when some light passed behind himflickering he couldnt hear anything he assumed it was car headlights through trees and branches

he knew there were four 

                           one by one he was able to make them out

first he thought they were painted on a square post black paint

then he recognised as he watched carefully that they threw dull reflections

                      7                                                                                                                                          5                                                                                                                                             5                                                                                                                                                   2

cut out of black metal or tin

 

numbers on a post in a thicket with nothing to speak of around or near it 

                                                                              numbers on a post 

curious

Whacha don know ya don know

 

it left him to numerology

7  12  17  19  1 plus 9   10  or  1

 

the number 10 he read resonates with the vibrations and energy of optimism confidence independence creative powers originality adaptability determination individuality

the number 1 resonates with the vibrations and energy of new beginnings creation independence motivation – seemed very much like 10 – striving willpower positiveness  self-reliance tenacity initiative 

                                                                                     overall creating ones own realities 

he liked that it was realities  not just reality

he liked that it was realities emerging from dreams

his daughter would be very proud of him 

0747  concluded 1123,  Day-between-Two-Ts,  31  3. 21

http://numerology-thenumbersandtheirmeanings.blogspot.com/p/attributes-of-numbers-0-to-10.html

 

 

WellShit he thought thered be something on the page when he opened to it

paper usually couldnt avoid the indignity of his scribbling 

                                                             particularly if it preferred black ink to red nibs to ball point

him itd always be ball point 

                               it wasnt that he wasnt fond of nibs and fresh ink but he spent five years in mechanical and architectural drawing  prejudiced for righthanders and instructors who wouldnt abide him when he flipped his board and T-Square to the right the room had to be uniform hed have to conform 

                                                                                     Cocksuckers  he was lefthanded

naturally he was a nonconformist

Not in my classroom, boy.

Boy   Boy being lefthanded he was the classroom nigger 

                                                             however when push came to shove they figuratively had to suck his cock none of the righthanded clowns in his drafting classes were sharper than he 

                                                                                                 which may have been inspired by him having to be surgical with nibs and ink taking great care not to smear what he just printed 

Hell must have Pains like that

 

he had an inklingHA of something going off in his head neurons sensingtingling  he was going to give it a moment

see if he had to duck shards of skullbone

 

 

WellShit 

        

             he thought he was more agile

he took a sliver just above his eyeball and like an icepick in the skilled hand of a lobotomist his lobe was shivered

he was pithed

he had nothing 

I got nothing

Nothing

Who was he writing 

Whas writing                               

 

the page was empty 

 

1038,  Monday,  29  3. 21

1328,  Twosday,  30  3. 21

 

               IHURT 

                                          thats whahe saw   whahe wrote

he tried to write it correctly

                          tried to separate it into subject verb  but he couldntthey refused to be parted

he was puzzled 

 

slowly it began to make sense

IHURT descriptor   he was in pain

he had physical emotional pain 

                                 he thought he might be able to remedy ithe remedied other physical pains ailments when he was hurt without analgesics 

he iced it

          he thought if he iced it he could reduce the inflammationthe swelling diminish it to perhaps   Ihurt 

then with the swelling down they might fall apart  fall separate

if it refused  maybe he could disguise it 

                                           purely cosmetic     eyhert  

the icing didnt work

he had to look at it differently 

see it differently 

                see how it might otherwise present   

then he might have or concoct another remedy  another solution 

                                                                                  IHURT 

           Ah 

               subjectverb  that action where he threatened to hurt others which ofcourse no amount of ice or analgesic might cure 

            anif not he  then perhaps it references the national problem  seemingly a national calling

positively unAmerican if one couldnt hurt another for any variety of disobedience insult perceived-wronging perception assume-challenged  entitlement see how he didnt go immediately for the bonethe jugular  racism

he was thinking out loud

                           because IHURT occurred to him while he was asleep while he dreamed and while he dreamed he began problem-solving composing  he composed until it woke him Get yer sorry assyer sorry self out of bed and get this down before I shut it down and blank your fucking memory – howdya like that muthafucker 

that threat moved him

he opened his eyes and IHURT was leaning over the bed looking him in the face

                                                                                     Whacha gonna make of me

Nothing Whadaya goin to reveal to me

 

hed keep at it

those were only twofor time being  perceptions 

hed continue to turn it around and aroundupside downinside out looking for other applications  hed muse for a while longer before he accepting either interpretation

 

IHURT

                it meant something

0717 – then 1018,  Monday,  29  3. 21

 

I’ve been giving some thought as to why, when I email buddies, they, for the most part, don’t get back to me.

Buddies

Yes. I write or text, I might as well be standing on my head; rarely does anything comeback to me. Mitch. One guy. Occasionally he’ll sling me a line, but usually it's not about what I wrote.

Ya hurt some feelings along the way

I don’t think so, I ‘ve known these guys since high school.

Since high school

You sound incredulous.

Wellyah frankly I am

You got high school buddies.

Boy friends

Stop.

that was a joke between them  he had girl friends and girlfriends and boy friends  his brother-in-law got creeped out when homosexuality was invoked  though he said he was okay with it 

                                                                            he wasnt  not really

High school friends  two   Recently a third

Two? 

Donsound incredulous 

Two. 

      And how often do you talk with them?

Telephone or otherwise

However.

Infrequently  but youif I remember correct  your graduating class was twohundredfifty

Thereabouts, yes, a little more.

But only a little more  not twoseventyfive not threehundred

No.

Small community  Intimate

                              My graduating class was nearly twelvehundred  Buddies  I havent a concept for buddies  How many buddies

Seven, eight. There are others, but not tight.

Class Reunions

Every five years.

Youve gone to all of them  Like church

Like church, com’on, not like church.

Youve gone to all of them

Yeah, sure.

Your buddies are still local say within a twentythirty mile radius

Yes. This is a beautiful place to live.

It is  Have houses

My friends have houses? Yes.

Entertain

How do you mean?

Entertain barbecues birthdays family friends

Yes.

Then bro count yourself fortunate and donworry about them not responding to emails texts They answer their cells when you call or you go to message and they call you in a day or two

Yes.

People have busy lives or theyre busy entertained by something thats captured their attentiontheir imagination

Okay. I could concede that.

Then concede

I could; but I’ve always seen myself as something of . an . . an . accelerant, oxygen feeding the fire.

Every dog has his day although from the inflection in your voice Id say you dog  youve had years

                                                                                                         Callings easier Words out of mouths not typed less energy frankly less time 

                                                                 An accelerant

Yes, an accelerant.

Hmm

What’s your hmm?

I hear celebrant

Not celebrant, accelerant.

Grease the rails Stoke the fire  Fires donburn forever 

                                                        Mebbe some of your friendships have run their course their orbits have grown wider and wider over the years 

A natural course Water erodes rock

Maybe.

Thank your lucky stars Call Convenient or rather more convenient then typing away on social mediahaving an audience typing away on a new phone they don understanddidnt understand the last one

Accelerate one at a timewill take more time but youll communicate get answers to your questions share insights 

You don’t?

I don

I don’t get it.

My buddies are twothousand miles away my choice  knew wha I was doin when I did it.   

1500-ish, Sunday,  28  3. 21

2234,  Sunday,  28  3. 21

Traffic  Stranger to Himself  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tROipfKCh0E

 

Sonofabitch thats one tenacious pubic hair

it clung to bowl above the waterline for three days

he tried to knock it downpssing on it  like it grew a taproot into the porcelain but finally this afternoon it weathered its last storm it shivered as it had been doing every day  but it finallyfinally let go

had he worn a cap he would have doffed it in honour 

                                                         a worthy adversary if ever a pubic hair could be an adversary

it reminded him of Jimmy Stewart dangling out the windowhangin on for dear life in Rear Window

tenacious  in extremis

                       start using Latin to describe a pubic hair  youve been gracedtake grace where you can find it he thought

 

Seriously?

Wha

You’re seriously talking to me about a pubic hair?

I am

Why would you do that?

Im citing its tenacity

It wasn’t tenacity, a hair is inanimate, it hasn’t Will, it hasn’t intentions, it can’t be, can’t possibly be tenacious.

An interesting argument

                            Youve not known me to lie to you

I have not.

Awright then Ive told you it held on for three daysthree days of assaultthree days of the toilet being flushed three days   it earned my ire

Three days

Whawould you call that whawouldya assign it have to say about it   about its   tenacity 

Odd.

Odd

Yes. I’m not letting you coerce me into saying that a pubic was invested with Will, or Determination.

Odd  Thas all ya got 

                        Awright then  well ditch tenacious  Ill concede to ya lll concede  Well call it miraculous . .

 . . No we won’t.

he knew he was picking a scab miraculous would swing open the door to religion hed get him to concede religion  then all bets were off

No. Not miraculous.

Thenwha

Then . . tenacious.

 

Then tenacious  Thank you 

 

1312,  Sunday,  28  3. 21

1409,  Sunday,  28  3. 21 

$552K -- American deaths by Trump virus

 

Liars liars  pants on fire  your nose is longer than a telephone wire 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DDEdFxUZ01s Castaways

got to have some levity 

                        otherwise ones intention towards Birx CDCs Redfield might be murderous they kept the former FAKE PRESIDENTs lies

https://www.msnbc.com/deadline-white-house/watch/-because-it-was-lies-olivia-troye-says-there-should-be-a-full-investigation-into-the-trump-admin-covid-response-109338693863

he had to excuse himself 

                         he was going to vomit

1704,  Monday,  29  3. 21

https://thetriad.thebulwark.com/p/shame-on-deborah-birx

 

 

  

she got a bug up her ass and he wasnt going to help her out with it

it was her bug

at most her sighing and ogling bugged him

Look how fit they are.

sixseven guys preening across the room from them

granted  she was worth preening about

Aren’t they fit?

Yah thats wha youth gives ya

What do you mean by that? she asked an edge in her voice

he wasnt buying into her game  her bug 

                                          Wha I said

But what do you mean?

Wha I said

What are you, implying?

No implication Im acknowledging their youth

You’re implying, aren't you . . I’m not young?

Yaint old Besides  theyre gathering like straysnotice theres no other women in the room theyre on the scent  Which ought to speak volumes

You’re judgin . .

. . Im observing them 

                      Ya got eyes yasee another woman in here Yare flattered by their attentiontheir undivided salivating  

No.  You’re judging them. 

Listen you asked me to take you out for a cocktail I have Yahave my attention but they seem to have yours So lets cut to the chase if yare so enamoured with the young fit men across the room I can leave you to your druthersyer attentions intentions

Yawanna pull a train Choo Choo Wanna be part of a gangbang Bang Bang Wanna risk rape Yasay No they say Didnt hear ya  No means Yes 

Knock yerself out

When ya finish your drink Im not hangin out Im headin home Anif ya stay yacan stop by an pickup your things later

Pick up my things. You’re being mean, you're being coercive.

Im not Im not buyin into drauma  Ive told ya that 

                                                       Ya got a bug up yer ass an thats on you

We got a good thing until it isnt

Not strongarmin ya

Do whayawanna do

 

You’re jealous.

Weak Yaknow Im not  Not in my makeup

Maybe sometimes a girl wants her man to be jealous. 

Wouldnt be much of a man 

                               Im not tellin ya not to enjoy the attention If they werent theyd be blind  Im sayin donlet it go to yer head

We got a good thing

                      until it isnt 

AM-ish first – now 1241,  Sunday,  28  3. 21

Grachan Moncur III  New Africa  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Xo0mzj-lg4

 

Because you scared the shit out of me 

                                        when you blubber through tears and sobsclutch at your heart because it feels like it is going to explode  because you scared the shit out of me legitimises the scene youve created you neednt apologise the fearthe discombobulation your frenzy is excused because if your witnesswitnesses have humanity compassion have empathy they will give you room because they fear that time when their card is turned and it will be turned and the irretrievablenessthe abyssthe blackness thats enveloped you will be theirs

Because you scared the shit out of me 

                                       he was breathless  he woke crying  

he awakened crying before 

he was grateful he didnt share his bed with anyone 

                                                     because sharing it they were intimate and they would naturally want to try and comfort him  but there was no comfortno wordsno embrace that could

a fools errand to console him 

nor did he want to be consoled  he wanted the timethis time as before as will be he wanted these discrete times involute inviolate to suffer to learn to manage to accept what is unacceptable

 

Because you scared the shit out of me 

                                         he cried it now out loud  he cried it often because he could never tell hershe would never hear him

Death cauterises one from the other

she felt otherwise

he did not

 

he suffered her death as an amputation 

                                          the irretrievableness is as real as feelingsuffering pain in his ghost limb

0744,  Thursday,  25  3. 21

1414,  Reggae Friday,  26  3. 21