the cowhide-covered GATEWAY cube appears  then beneath it  To skip disk checking, press any key within 9 seconds  8 seconds  7 seconds  6 seconds  5 seconds  4 seconds  3 seconds  2 seconds  1 second

he didnt

he nearly couldnt

it reminded him too much of black and white televised Cape Canaveral countdowns John Glenn Alan Shepard Mercury it reminded him too much of the Kennedy Space Center NASAs countdowns Apollo launches

Gus Grissom Edward White Roger Chaffee 

it reminded him of the stars 

being offplanet

every time he started his computer he relished its monotonous countdown

he was eager for  what?

                   for more often than not he had an idea where he wanted to go but after his onset how he got to where he ended up he had no idea how he got there

he could cheat  read his history  but he liked to leave it untouched for his girlfriend to peruse 

she couldnt help herself

when she admitted itshe always did he reminded her of the proverb Curiosity killed the pussy(he loved the look in her eyes)

It killed the cat                                       

Maybe kills your cat  It kills pussy in my world

Forcryinoutloud

Reading my history gets you pussylike it or not   Easily remedied

he was all about remedies

curiously the countdowns reminded him of a conversation he had a long time ago with his maw

as a young boy he had a proclivity for getting lost

he got lost because he was sure he wouldnt

he knew his way

If you think about it Maw  you screwed up when you taught me our home telephone number NE1-5471
  
I cant believe you remember the number                   

I cant believe you dont remember the times I ended up using it when I was lost

You got lost often

I did  Hence why you screwed upI shouldnt say you I should say you and Dad and Gramma

How did we screw up

You should have taught me a wrong number  First time out the gate I would have been one less mouth to feedand we had plenty of mouths to feed  Economically viable and brilliantutterly brilliant

Youre terrible

No more terrible than Paw telling me to go out and play in trafficbut if I could wait one moment  he had to call Uncle Gene first and up my life insurance

He was teasing Joe

He was prescient  And you didnt see the gleam in his eye     I would define it cha-ching

You are terrible

So everyone says

he liked that he had a countdown every day and he was eager for  What?

Let it come                    

Hell  he cherished that he woke up alive   he unwrapped each day slowly delicately like an unexpected Christmas gift

  

1900,  Saturday,  1  7. 17

1124,  Monday,  3  7. 17

he was troubled by the headline of the Nation: Daring to Dream in the Age of Trump(he wished theyd get his name right: Drumpf)  and Age Age?  era  epoch  a Warholian glimmer of fame  or defamation    nonothing of the sort   journalistic hyperbole  it certainly grabbed his attention    

his take on Americas sorted presidential quagmire was simple arithmetic

he equated Drumpf with president and president with cunt

he laughed out loud Sunday morning when he read online the Guardian headline: “‘I’m president, they’re not’: Donald Trump(the Guardian gets his name wrong too) savages media at veteran’s rally”(the posted picture shows the president before a smiling phalanx of older white men(an evangelical event) who one could assume were veterans(of one thing or another although it was implied they were military veterans)  Drumpf was exercising his new pony fraud news over his old hat fake news whose traction to his mind was DOA since its inception

DOA  as the Drumpf presidency

applying his arithmetic to the headline made him laugh aloud: ‘I’m a cunt, they’re not’ 

it never never got old

0904,  Sunday,  2  7. 17

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2017/jul/02/im-president-theyre-not-donald-trump-savages-media-at-veterans-rally

What happened to you when you broke the law of your own words?

she tried hard not tobut she did she glared at him  it followed a flutter of eyelashesa brief askancebutterflies feeding from a flowering white sage  then the hard dark burn

he didnt look away

he wasnt breaking his law

Youre fixing me with this  this this awful situation

It was awful before you stepped in it  Wasnt it

Somebody had to

Nobody had to

Somebody had to help her . .

. . Somebodys always helped her  because thats what she wantsbecause  then she has no responsibility for anything  Shes not even responsible for herself

It gives me no pleasure saying this  I am not accusing you

                                                 Youve said as much

But I have no intention of disabusing you of the notion the lie  that youre where you are for any reason other than you put yourself there

Nobody put a gun to your head

Shes my mother. .

. . STOP 

       She birthed you  But shes never been a mother to you

If she were your mother

If she was Idve been gone long ago

                               But thats semantics because Im not you and you are

You can be very cruel

If me being honest with you is crueland thats how youd define it  Then Im cruel and Ill not apologise for it

You break it you bought it  Youd say

You believe otherwise

I dont

No you dont

But I cant walk away

Then you cant walk away

                      You also shouldnt complain  But then that would verge on sainthood

Ill listen  I will listen   Although I can only listen

Youll wear your white priests collar for me

Im cooler than that  Its a dickie

Groovy

Fuckin groovy

she smiled

I knew there was a smile in there somewhere

Youre always able to make me smile

This is not forever baby

I love when you call me baby

he smiled

Its not forever

It feels like forever

Because youre up to your eyeballs in it 

Yes   Yes  I  am    And youre right   Its my own doing

Identifying the disease is the greatest part of the battle  Then applying the cure  

The balls in my court

As it always has been

Yes

     It has been

he took her by the elbow  Lets walk   Too bad its not raining 

It would be lovely walking in the rain

Your nativecant you do something about it 

A rain dance

Took the words right out of my mouth 

If I could I wouldnt be in my predicament 

Maybe  Maybe not   Would be heap big medicine

Youre such an asshole

I dont even have to work at it 

No  No you dont youre fortunate you know exactly who you are and you cant be pushed off who you are

Thank you  A pig frying in his own fat

Jesus 

         Youre so visual

Gets the job done

It does

he yanked her aside Watch out for the dogshitshe was deep in her head

Fuckin people who dont clean up after their dogs

                                        WhyIoughta

she burst into laughterthen into tears  through her tears she said I love you

he smiled  he gently kissed her forehead

                                  then he whispered into her ear Yaoughta

1337,  Saturday,  1  7. 17