. . . Yagetit yagetit cracking himself up the three syllables split apart under his torrent of laughter

bro sighedrolled his eyes

                           he was always a few steps behindcouldnt keep up

which was alright

often he couldnt keepup with himself

like trying to walkup a landslide an avalanche

                                                  yet

despite the backwards descentthe swift disarray

he could still see the apex endgame

itd just take him a little longer to get there

I didn’t hear you.

wiping tears from his eyes

                             Do you understand  You don hear me a lot

A curious excuse

sighing and rolling  It’s not an excuse.

Context

          I framed wha I said in the context of our conversation so  unless you didnt hear the last five minutes of it its an excuse

Nobody likes explaining jokes

There was a joke?

My first inclination is to say yes youre the joke  but thawoud be unkind

                                                                           Second I refuse to believe youre so dense it didnt penetrate he chuckled

defensively harsh That’s not funny.

Ah he noddedhumoured more so  You did hear me

                                                    But as always  uncomfortable with the subject which you must understand is why I return to it as often as I do Like picking a scab But yaknow no matter how picked a scab is it eventually heals it scars becomes callused  desensitises

                                                              Somehow you capably defy that Id say its deepseated an Id say thas not good

bro looked like he was going to blow

                                      he growled Ever think you might be a faggot?

No

      You think you might be

Fuckyou.

Brother if I coud I woud I think Im a tasty piece of ass  No complaint has ever been lodged against me

                                                                                                            Too exhausted  Too breathless

But this is about you

Your terrible aversion

Despite insisting faggots homos gays   They don bother you

he clasped his arms tightly across his chest the fetal position when one cant lay down

                                                                                       You don’t shaddup up I’m gone.

Im gone its your place

                        I aint shaddingup

   measured Then you need to leave.

Lemme know when you return to earth  Appreciate the cup of Joe

 

he had walked 

it was a lovely sunlit blue sky day

it still was

      he chuckled said to himself

                                     That was funny

he had said Gays get more ass than heterosexuals  Yagetit . . .

1430ish,  2sday,  5  12. 23

1020,  Saturday,  9  12. 23

. . . A horse woud be insulted

You can’t insult a hors . .

. . Yacan I did

                  I did by only being set atop it  Bucked me kicked me in the back when I hit the ground  I am not fond

Although

           Ill stand up for one if they were being insulted or beat  In a heartbeat

That makes no sense.

All the sense in the world

                             However no sense to they who are ignorantYOU he didnt wait from him to ask

So you’ll insult me?

Youd insult a horse yes

I think I know. By your own admission you do not hang around with horses.

No.

     My ex-wif . .

. . Nothing to brag abou . .

. . Excuse me . .

. . All to hell  Do I have to hear an ex-wife tale

I helped her with her horses.

Wha a guy

              Up until you she was doin awrighthadnt needed any help

No. But why wouldn’t I?

Why woudya

                She help you out with gobs an gobs of sex

This has nothing to do wit . .

. . It does

fucking guys face went flush

                                It.  Doesn’t.

Does

      Youd insult a horse

Confirmation is the correct vernacular.

No

     Configuration

No. Here. I’ll find it.

before he could tell him not to he had his trusty phone out and was Googling

   Here. No. That’s not it.   Confirmation. Isn't that usually have something to do with church?

After First Holy Communion Ya get to choose a sainted middle name  Ojoy

Were you confirmed?

No  First Communion nearly killed me

   Confirmation.

Not confirmation

Oh. No.   It’s conformatio . .

. . Which is different  

                       An frankly no better still insulting

                       

But it’s not configuration.

Youre killin me Bleat your conformation

Conformation. The shape or structure of something, especially an animal I was right.

An configuration

It’s not . .

. . Wastin my time look it up  Yaforced me to humour you an your trusty companion

Unlike your ex-wife

Quit with her . .

. . Sooner you look it up I will  Shes leverage

   Configuration.

                     Hmmm.

Whas it say

It says . . . an arrangement of elements in a particular form, figure, or combination.

BAM

No bam.

Youre an idiot tellya wha

What?

Are you going to say?

Rather than insult a horse Tellya wha

                                          Walk up to any woman an say  I coudnt help myself  I had to come over an compliment you on your conformation  Might get popped in the chops   Same woman  Compliment her on her configuration  Shell take tha as a compliment

                                                 Figures in it

Formation sounds dumpy

Id be forced to bet on it

  

   Fuck you.

Lemme guess

                   Semantics

1414,  2sday,  5  12. 23

1506,  Reggaefriday – John Lennon,  8  12. 23

Lennon  Woman  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y0jTA0DtZvY

he was talking with his Dad

chewing the fat

getting caughtup

sharing what books they were reading or intended to read

what was new with the family

conversation slipped to his youngest brotherKids a character

                                                              That kid’s a character. his father echoing his thought

which made him laugh

all his siblings were

                       Ah  But yaknow where tha came from

Came from? What?

What characters your children are

Careful, son.

               I want you to rememberyou were there, remember that your little brother fell off the slide at the family picnic, landed on his head. You may also recall that the doctor said children are bouncy, your brother had that going for him, but he warned there may have been a brain injury that wasn’t apparent then, though may exhibit when he was older.

I remember

               But hes always been a bit touched

Are you really saying that about your brother?

I am

         Hes number eight Dad

Lemme say this   Im number one I know full well that the attributes genetics ifya woud  tha entering this life I helped myself to the top shelf  Im assuming that each an every of my siblings took from whawas left   As number eight

Id guess slim pickings

his father nodded as he spoke

                                  There is that, son, there’s that.

But if I also may say

                       he waited maybe his father didnt want to hear  hed spare him

Yes.

Me and my brothers and sisters weel   we didnt fall far from the apple tree

his nodding stopped

                      What are you implying?

Nothing  I said it

                   Were characters because you an Maw are characters

his nodding began again

                            although he didnt say

that which prompted the vignette was his father telling him that his brother had spent an afternoon the past weekend

   So he’s going to leave. I gave him a big hug and a kiss. As he stepped back from me I said to him, you know, either I’m shrinking or you’re getting bigger.

It’s you, Dad. It’s you.

                         The kid’s a character. 

they laughed

1303,  Reggaefriday – John Lennon,  8  12. 23

GOT CATS

                 it begged asking

he was returning some fouled DVDs to the library desk

Michael who he knew from working with before Michael became a librarian helped him

he asked him if he was getting excited to see his kids for the Holidayswhen was he expecting them home from college

They’re not coming home.

Wha

      he remembered his excitement when his girls came home to spend Christmas and sometimes New Years he woudnt hold tha against them  New Years was a time to be with friends  he hadnt spent a New Years with his parents since last century

No. Not this year. My wife and I will go up during the interim, while they have time off, we haven’t firmed up the time yet.

Weelshit Thas a bummer

Yeah. They have cats.

he tilted his head like a dog to a whistle

                                            Furred commitments  I get it   I got em too

Yeah.

        We didn’t give them the option of leaving their cats home with us. Their pets, not ours.

that stung a bit 

he covered his girls

he covered his wife

although when she died she couldnt take them with her 

1330,  Thursday – Pearl Harbor,  7  12. 23

1126,  Reggaefriday – John Lennon,  8  12. 23

he wasnt going to say

                         but then he was provoked again  by an inane feckless believer who could take their Faith and shove it up their ass

last Tuesday House Speaker Mike Johnson addressed the National Association of Christian Lawmakers (NACL) he was “grateful” the Press wasnt allowed inside

the NACL founded by a former Arkansas state senator Jason Rapert thas unfortunate coud be spelled Rape-rt or Raper-t  expressed hope that in 2024 Americans “will re-elect Jesus to be on the throne here again in our country.”

     he had been willing to let things go since his girlfriend laughedmocked him of his inadvertent acronym for the former

       I can’t believe I’m beating you to the punch.

Whastha

Fat orange eunuch.

Thaswha I said

Yes.    Awrightee.  Your acronym he flincheddidnt like em is FOE.

   Obrother

You said it.

snorted

          Though apropos

Yes. Very.

hed been willing to let it go not fixate on former  malignancies untreated usually kill their host

                                                                                                    but re-elect Jesus to be on the throne again chapped his hide

he thought it was Orange Jesus

then no sooner had he read re-elect Jesus he read Red Caesar

                                                                   all he could think was

if given a shot a chance

                          formerd be called black an blue cunt hur  BBC

which he thought might not chap the British Broadcasting Corporations hide

1642,  Thursday – Pearl Harbor,  7  12. 23

0955,  Reggaefriday – John Lennon,  8  12. 23

https://www.msnbc.com/opinion/msnbc-opinion/house-speaker-mike-johnson-moses-speech-rcna128126?cid=eml_mda_20231208&user_email=e4c91d00eead6d858374885584701152a02c6d873bb23bf387b4583a289e5951

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2023/oct/01/red-caesar-authoritarianism-republicans-extreme-right

“I can stand in the middle of Fifth Avenue and shoot somebody, and I wouldn’t lose any voters, OK?”

                                                                                                           Right                        

he was happy at least he didnt concluded his offensive remark with right OK is more aligned with the formers intellect

ZIP NADA   NONE

also at least he appreciated that former admitted he would kill someone who wouldnt vote for him

                                                                                                        however

what he would have most appreciated would have been it not be a boast  rather that he would have said the time and date he intended to stand in the middle of Fifth Avenue

hed take a plane

rent a car

              Right

1550  5s!  Thursday – Pearl Harbor,  7  12. 23

1213,  Reggaefriday – John Lennon,  8  12. 23

a bright Red throughline

                            one didnt truly have to be thoughtful to see it

its blatant 

            assuming a significant portion of the American voting population knew and understood the word blatant

   began with Conways defence two days into the formers administration her “alternative facts” regarding the paltry attendance of the appalling classic American Carnage inaugural speech

these prefaced the blizzard tsunami of lies

the accusations of Fake News

all the “Acting Heads” who served an “Acting president”

the roadshows rallies

                         the terrible disappointment inconvenience that they had to be curtailed because of CoVid-19

“It’ll disappear . . . go away.”

the alternate slates of state electors PLOT

a

livid

vivid

bright

RED

line

 

1111,  Thursday,  7  12. 23

https://time.com/4642689/kellyanne-conway-sean-spicer-donald-trump-alternative-facts/

American Carnage  https://www.theguardian.com/world/2017/jan/20/donald-trump-transition-of-power-president-first-speech

https://trumpwhitehouse.archives.gov/briefings-statements/the-inaugural-address/

https://fortune.com/2019/11/27/trump-acting-heads-cabinet-presidency/

https://www.americanoversight.org/investigation/the-alternate-electors-plot-to-overturn-the-2020-election

Three Dog Night  Liar  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7XRz39R8GsM

Whas not to like

someone offers you a bite of freshly slaughtered bright bloodred raw liver

                                                                                     he was biting

she offered

was a girl after his own heart

                                    not that she was after his heart thatd be offal

he knew too many peopletoo many families who which he found awful threw away turkey giblets IM RIGHT HERE If you werent going to eat them why didnt you give them to me you know I eat organs

                                                                                         he understood it was cultural

he also understood it was economic

                                       however

when your one of eleven you eat whats served

didnt have to

could go hungry a night

wasnt gonna kill you

not eating helped him appreciate having something to eat 

                                                               something

something taught him that food was nothing more than fuel

he fueled once a day

     he preferred bitter or salty to sweet which wiped outexcept on occasion  desserts  baked goods icecream candies sodas

But that’s you. complained many he knew who felt they had to defend their tastes or eating

defend

         didnt get that

he admitted what HE preferred

                                  preference is defined “a greater liking for one alternative over another or others.” according to his New Oxford American Dictionary – Second Edition                                               

the text he keeps at hand

                              a lot of people dont prefer texts either

not technically savvy

neither was he

she was thrilled

he was thrilled by her

he preferred thrilled

                      thrill is “a sudden feeling of excitement and pleasure.”

Whas not to like

AMish,  Thursday – Pearl Harbor,  7  12. 23

Trumpvirus

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PWsPwNlclg0

arithmetic

todays Pearl Harbor Day  1,184,345 Americans dead

from Black Friday, Nov24  1,183,390

                                   955 deaths and sorrow in the past 13 days

he has to acknowledge the approximately 74 people who have died each day

1209,  Thursday – Pearl Harbor, 1941,  7  12. 23

https://www.worldometers.info/coronavirus/country/us/

he almost couldnt bear to look at the illuminated hands of the small travel clock perched beside the telephone atop the bookcase

              Youre a big boy  Look   It aint gonna killya

this was an interior dialogue

mariachi didnt come around until after a cup of coffee

You sure

   Im as sure as you

                          Look

sixsixteen  6:16

                    Yasee  Had I looked a minute earlier Id have been dicked by a five

But yadidnt

I did not

Now whacha gonna do with sixsixteen

Im goin . .

. . Of course we are

   Going back to bed close my eyes an play with the forgiving time

Sounds like a plan

                     Tell me about it when youre up in the morning Im going to sleep

the light went out immediately wasnt fucking around

slipping under the blankets he laid down

his cat jumped himshed held down the fort while he went to the bathroom checked the clock

stroking her neckher throat gently strumming the top of her head Im back  Thanks for keeping the bed warm leftie

she turnedretreated he parted his legs she curled round curled round nestled tight up against his crotch closed her eyes purred

           she was off

on the back of his closed eyes which comprised one viewing screen  he pinned up 6:16

it was coloured pale blue

no fucking idea why

he began manipulating it hypnagogic leaned in over his shoulder  Whacha got   Hmmm

his interior voice in his head sounded like he sounded when he spoke out loud

he hoped his voice sounded different to others who heard him talk

he listened

             Dropping the colon its symmetric   SIX  ONE  SIX

Pulldown on the ONE

Elongate it

Distort it so that it loses its signifier as the number one

SIX  SLASH  SIX

                       Aaah  yasee

Six parts to six parts is actually one to one which means the ones whole a whole One

   Awright

                   One .  .   .

that mélange yes mélange stepped aside as hypnagogic giggledappropriated his fading consciousness and flung him into a lather where he and a women he didnt knowbarely glanced at were stripping off their clothes to race to her bed  had to be the hallway wasnt his  she beat him naked and ran jumped into bed immediately diving under the blankets clasping them around her  it was like she could see him through them as he went to the sides the foot of the bed trying to yank them freetrying to expose her seeing only her outline her shape her rounds under the blankets  she thwarted his every effort he frankly  exhausted himself trying to unearth her

                                                                       HEY

muffled YAH.

You win  I cant believe I cant get my hands on you

YAH. I’M GOOD AT THIS.

he leaned his thighs against the side of the bed

YOU GIVE UP?

Not give up Can I concede for now

FOR NOW?

Yah  Lemme catch my breath

JUST FOR NOW?

Yah

AWRIGHT.

              then her hand her wrist her forearm snaked out  she grabbed his cock

YOU’RE MIGHTY HARD.

Your fault

LET ME HELP YOU WITH THAT. 

                                   vigorously  artfully  she masturbated him

                 

he erupted

OOOOH

           SUPPOSE WE’LL HAVE TO LAUNDER THE BLANKET.

then she began to emerge like a shivering butterfly from her softwoven pale blue chrysalis

2sday,  5  12. 23

1133,  day-between-2-Ts,  6  12. 23

bookends

not where he usually found them

                                   though thats where he found thesefinding himself distracted by the rotting road under his feet through his worn shoes a hole in the toe of one hole in the sole of the other

an old street

             its composite stones and pebbles were being revealedwere no longer denied the sunlightwarming in it again after mixed and buried in sand and concrete for the better part of a century                                

he tucked the book he was reading under his arm

                                                     instead

he tried to read the rocks

his feet were more successful

they could read its braille

it was when he stopped to take in the roads devolution that he recognised the first bookend  to his left

a daycare held at a church children playing insidecontained by a chainlinked fence

he couldnt identify the playground equipment 

                                                  there were no swings or slides or jungle gyms or a concrete sewer pipe to scramble over and within  made a great fort

he couldnt see if they played on woodchips

at the fencededge above him he saw two little boys a little girl she wore a dress a tiara woundup in her mussed blonde tresses one of the boys also wore a tiara

without reason he turned suddenlylooked oneeighty away to what had been his right as he walkedread up the street

   there another bookend

this he looked down into

a small greenspace

a small whitepainted concrete bench on the grass

it too was separated from him by a chainlinked fence

he knew the place a school that taught assisted adults with developmental disabilities

a woman stood on the grass at the edge of a blacktopped parking lot

she was very small not much taller than the little girl wearing the tiara her hair was also blonde  cut in a manageable Dutch Boy

she was aloneheld an opened hand to her chest as if restraining herself then  thumped her chest as she jerked forward from the waist again and again and again and again . . . he didnt count the times

   finally   uncomfortably

                                he looked away

he collected bookends

these were an odd pair

possibly 2PM,  Monday,  4  12. 23

1212AM,  day-between-2-Ts,  6  12. 23

0927,  day-between-2-Ts