it was funny

            his buddy didnt find it funny but he wasnt clever half as hequarter as he why was he splitting hairs he wasnt clever but once in a blue moon then he needed acknowledgement because he wasnt sure

Come on  thas funnyself-deprecating

friend didnt like self-deprecationwas touchy

                                               when he knocked all men as pigs friend was butthurt  I’m not.

You are 

         Were piggish one way or another . . 

. . I’m not.

Ya also aint a gift to women

                              Because youve pulled the wool down over a couplefews eyes don fool yourself Not a gift

And you are?

   No 

whenever they got into this ruckusthis Gordians Not friend failed to recall he always thas an absolute another thing tha offended him alwaysalways said No to And you are? 

                                                       learning curve be damned friend was obliviouslacked memory except for his Bruce Springsteen Glory Days tales 

                                                     he was no Ulysses

   No 

       Oink oink oink anhed laugh enjoying the dark scowl on friends face 

Christ ya hold yourself in mighty high esteem  Whas tha like   Whas it like to be peerless

You certainly aint.

No 

   Given my faults if I were a diamond ya coudnt give me away probably why Im easy anyes ya can quote mescrawl my name in black magicmarker on Womens room stalls 

                                                          that flustered him toohe couldnt imagine going into a Womens bathroom because it wasnt a Mens room 

                                            Theyre no cleaner than a guys room man

his expression was choice 

                           women on pedestals in white horse drawn chariots kill dragons for

he enjoyed women who killed their own dragons wondered tha friends dragons looked like 

back to funnywha made friend flinch 

                                        Ya understand our births are zip according to game theory

theyd been talking about the game Go the black an white stones appealed aesthetically he thought he might like to dabble with it but the more he thought the more he recognised it was a zero-sum game a game like chess strategy if he knew one thing about himself anhe knew manymany things he despised strategy planning liked going off halfcocked explained his broken bones and scarsexplained his willingness to die on every hill   

Speak for yourself.

No Im speaking for both of us 

                                Yawerent an immaculate conception rather fumbling in bed an a fuck

riled NO.

Your parents didnt fuck

How dare you?

Mine fucked I like fucking   Wha did your parent do an wha do you do

You’re rudeyou understand how rude you are?

Rude versus prude

                      Take rude every time

1507,  Thursday,  6  10. 22

1159,  Sunday,  9  10. 22

Bruce Springsteen  Glory Days  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nvUOgIgLqOQ 

Cream  Tales of Brave Ulysses  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J2CCfxiQ5QY

it was ironic

he read that Annie Ernaux won the Nobel Peace Prize for Literature

every year with the news he sought to read a book by the winning author he had the majority of Bob Dylans vinyl 

he thought hed start with her Happening

                                           anwha happened  his online library search informed him Happening was available only as an ebook

an ebook

utterly worthless to him

                         whawas the experience of reading words emotions in light and not printed on paper these words were ironic 

             reminiscent of on-screen porn

   succinctly

               hed rather be having sex than watching itrather a book in hand than his cock

                                                                                                 made perfect sense

 

“There is no such thing as a lesser truth.” Ernaux

1008,  Sunday,  9  10. 22

she reminded him

had she not he wouldnt have remembered

and it is memorable 

8 years ago todayOctober 8 under the Blood Moon eclipse  2014  they murdered a god

he said they because they were in the car together

she said they because he refused to sacrifice them

the god left him no options 

                        

they were traveling on the highway at better than 70 miles per hour there was a right bend to the road a deep culvert left a stand of trees right  He stood on the shoulder of the road had come up out of the cleft

Ohno no no he cried 

                     crying loud enough to rouse her as he went to slap her thigh  to prepare

Aw no manplease  please stay right where you areStay Im not swervingIm keeping my line

the deer ran out in front of them 

                                just before impact in the headlights the deer shone brilliantblue he thought maybe theyd pass harmlessly through it 

                           IMPACThood sprung covered the windshield the deer went over the car airbags deployed he took his foot from the gasslipped down into the seatpeered through the space between the dash and the hood  eventually he coaxed the car to the side of the road and began braking to a stop 

Are you okay he asked

                         she said her abdomen and chest hurt she had reclined the seat to sleep  the shoulderharness was worthlessthe belt around her hips didnt help she slipped nearly into the leg space under the glovebox 

                                                                                                                he unclasped them called 911 called insurance got out of the car crossed in front of it was dumbfounded it wasnt painted electricblue he opened her door and helped her out How are you feeling he didnt see any woundsnothing apparent he helped her up onto the knoll at the foot of the trees and laid his jacket down for her to lay on  Okay baby try an relax relax  see if you can feel anything  assess any other pains 

                                              The deer?

Im afraid its dead

You saw the blue light it emanated?

I did  Yes

We killed a god.

1548,  Saturday,  8  10. 22

1648,  Saturday

laughing to himselfhe turned away from looking out the train window the giggle was for two storefronts side by side bays he saw CHA CHA CHA dance studio Highstreet cannabis dispensary

                                                                                 he enjoyed their randomness symbiosis arrangement his daughter went by Chacha to her nieces spun off Polish Ciocia aunt and that she was also terribly well-versedknew the best labels for varieties of cannabis their strains indica sativa hybrids CBD THC CBG an anti-inflammatoryran circles around his grass nomenclature he wasnt cool he liked to fire up a joint hit a bong  nibbles gummies lacked ritual

                        but that was himhe did him others could do themselves 

What?

Yaheard me it went without saying and he wouldnt

as he turned in SETTING train interior he was just in time to catch a burly chick stomp all she had was stomp past his seat the aisle just large enough to accommodate her ass

shaggy rustred hair hung out of a knitted banded stocking cap that wasnt colour-coordinated with the jersey she wore got her moneys worth on its back was

                                         TONIGHT 

                                                              WE FLY 

ohferChristssake please someone clip her wings  she dropped out of the sky somebody might get hurt

she took a seat that was opposite a seat facing her

the train stopped in Camarillo

an announcement came over the PA explaining that seats facing one another were meant for parties of three or four

If you’re seated there, please move to allow parties to sit together.

the train lurched into motion

a conductor came through taking tickets from newly-boarded passengers 

                                                                             he saw her couldnt miss her  and walked by without a word

   Hmm he thought maybe she could fly  though couldnt imagine with who antha was saying something

0855,  Monday,  12  9. 22

1151,  Saturday,  8  10. 22

Blahblah blah blah . . . ending his heated screed with . . in your parlance.

Oui Parlez-vous me 

                     I think not  so much mud in your eye

There’s scant difference between where we stand.

Then come to my side

Ohno, Hell no.

But I should submit 

Frankly yes.

Yare a riot Alice as Ralph Kramden woud say Thad be a cold day in Hell 

Something is good or evil . . two sides of a coin.

Positive or negative

You’d equate evil with negativeyakiddin me? Iran, Iraq, North Korean, The Axis of Negative? Kind of falls on its face.

Axis of Evil shoud have fallen on its face hard Not five months after September11 Bush the Younger the Idiot the I follow--You lead dancer Texan neocon snake oil salesman shoud have shut his piehole 

                                                                                            Axis of Evil played well to its audience however they were dupedI wasnt  Shoud have been a matter of global intelligence not the boots on the ground debacle it was doomed to become  Abject stupidity  Wasted worldwide good will  Threw it in the trash  Yare either with us or against us  Asshole 

                                 You didnt see it coming

I dont think you did.

If we coud have bet I woud have absolutelyABSOLUTELY bet the farm The Press the Fourth Estate let us downgot the wool pulled over its eyes 

                           All one had to do was read the statement of principlemission statement of The Project for the New American Century  I had  They served us one steamy pile of shit and majority country gobbled it down with serving spoonsfuck teaspoons tablespoons politely chewing between bites

                                                                              Nixing evil  all Im doin is neutering emasculating its religious connotation

Thas old history, raking through cold ash and coals.

Old history determines new history the future 

1330,  Sunday,  24  4. 22

444preferred,  ReggaeFriday,  7  10. 22

https://www.rrojasdatabank.info/pfpc/PNAC---statement%20of%20principles.pdf 

https://www.e-ir.info/2020/02/01/new-american-century-1997-2006-and-the-post-cold-war-neoconservative-moment/ 

https://www.aljazeera.com/news/2021/9/10/decades-after-9-11-what-became-of-the-uss

it didnt begin that way  at least not to his mindhis thinking 

                                                                  but it has been ten years

Ten years tail end of Obamas administration shitheads administered lies Trumpvirus O’Biden phony stolen election  January 6 and on an on an on ad nauseam

he could understand the fatigue 

                                  but to erect a compound a massive black swinging gate spanning a doubledrive run on remote get a dog fix motion-sensory lighting hang strands of light around the house over the yard

wasnt fatigue

FEAR

they wore husband and wife matching tshirts that advertised gun ranges obstacle courses they attended braggadocio  side arm training                                                                                                                             Why he asked

Self defense.

Not the coming storm they were devout Republicans somehow he missed that his family and friends gleamed that not him

they clammed up looked deadly serious maybe that deadly seriousness came from aiming a handgun or rifle a squint  spying bullseyes 

he originally left the city urban centers for rural darkness hell the front street wasnt lit with street lamps 

                                                                                                               seems they were now afraid of the dark 

he had to contend with their light pollution set on a timer fuckin clockwork electric eye perhaps dusk falls lighting switchs on

             the entire compound glowing like the mushroom cap of an atomic bomb

he wondered when the moat the gators or some aquatic predatory denizen were going in 

he sighedfingering the keen honed edges of hand axes and kbars

       

2134,  Day-between-Two-Ts,  5  10. 22

1134,  ReggaeFriday,  7  10. 22

The Motels  Only the Lonely  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZaPTELylZ1s

startledhe wokewiped his hand down his face dry scrub  stimulate himselfget the sleep and nonsense out of his eyes  Wha the fuck . .

Grimhuh

Jesus ya can say tha againfreakin murder an mayhem  burying dead bodies

Might teachya not to nap during the day

Really how often do I nap

Dare say itll be some time again before you do

he nodded sharply 

                    Whawas terrible horrible

Tha was threeAM witching shit . .

. . In the middle of the day

Yah 

      Anaesthetising then drowning them bloodless  Thawas inspired 

Inspired

Donya think  Very discreet 

                                Whad they dotheir crime  I missed tha part

How the hell did ya miss tha

I went for a sandwichFuck if I know yare the one with the laser focus we wander around in an out there wasnt anyone else in the room

anyone else he was yakking with an inner a Mariachi he thought they moved en masse like a protozoan  amoebic  usually twothree bound binded

Yaoughta say I cant read your mind like you can read ours

I thought you hung around in clutches twothree at a time

No kinda ruffled his feathers  we like our alone timenot unlike you  despite being dependent on you for our existence

Come on youse come an go

Baby aint no in an out doorevolved in your ether since you were a kid

    Yes  I recall 

                      Anywho thawas grim Tellya wha pass it around  if I appear to want to lay down during the day puke on my pineal spit in my eye 

heshe shehe howled 

                         Awman thawas pretty good old thirdeye governs your circadian rhythm  actually quite astute

 I have my moments

Ya do ya certainly do

0903,  Sunday,  11  9. 22

1043,  ReggaeFriday,  7  10. 22

Who  Can You See the Real Me  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6y1c3xllo8c

HATE! 

           bandied about quite a bit these days 

frankly

        big in the mouths of the Right racists  white religious Nationalists 

he was accused of being hateful Excuse me

                                                 Isnt part of my vocabulary

  I dislike immensely but not hate Ive rolled it in together with the concept of Good and Evil  I believe Good and Bad

Evil is a religious noun which I refuse to waste my time considering if people need religion they can have it just steer clear of me  Im an atheist

An for tha unelectable

                         Hell  I have trouble with In God We Trust on our paper money

Awnuts I misspoke 

                     There is one thing that I hate  Hate solely reserved for it

I hate showering an when no sooner out of the shower dried I have to take a shit  Kinda defeats the purpose of having showered

1306,  Thursday,  6  10.  22

  Tipsy Fox Mart

                   in itself the signage from the train window made him hoophumoured him if he lived in Moorpark hed definitely give the store his business however what sealed the deal was the fox who emergedcame out through the swinging glassplate doorjiggled the OPEN sign onto the porch into the sun  she absolutely whiplashed his headneck as he passed  a vicious doubletake

                                   she was dazzling

passedby  he closed his eyes 

                               Aah she remainedstayed in his eyes his mind  she was young shapelyawesomely shapely dressed to kill wore an evening gown like he saw in upscale nightclubs maybe stopping off before heading home to get some sleep  partied all night long 

                                                 he wondered what she had in the brown paper bag she held in the crook of her armpressed against her breastenhancing her cleavage breakfast perhaps milk for over her cold cereal  fruit  maybe a pastry  a quick bite strip shower climb into bed slip away into sleep                                                                                                                                he had trouble letting her sleep

he caressedrubbed her back fanny legs listened to her breathlistened to her breathe                

Let her sleep

She earned it 

Camarillo next stop startled him  

                                       she didnt go anywherestuck right with him

he pretended he was asleep 

                             watched her sleep  stroked her softly

  Yeah

A voyageur 

 So what      

0827,  Monday,  12  9. 22

1024,  Thursday,  6  10. 22

Paul Revere and the Raiders  Hungry  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OuBGWUSJGp4

1.06M deaths in America from Trumpvirus 

                                           he hadnt visited it in a while 

shame on him

477 died yesterday

why isnt that scrolling in the corner of every PC laptop cellphone on social media 

                                                                                     aint nothing more social than death

1650, Day-between-Two-Ts,  5  10.  22 

https://www.google.com/search?q=u.s.+coronavirus+death+toll&rlz=1C1ILPI_enUS778US778&oq=U.S.+coron&aqs=chrome.4.69i57j0i512l8j0i390.16896j0j15&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8

ordinarily he wouldnt have touch it with a tenfoot polegiven it wide berth 

                                                                              however  her fault she caught his eye

infected affected him

he was pleasantly surprised 

                               itd been awhile since he was arrestedwhere he turned his headcaught a glimpse turnedaway then rubbernecked back looking again  harder

   despite himself he wandered closer 

slogans ran amokdid nimble cartwheels across his mind Clairol’s The closer he gets, the better you look.  Does she or doesn’t she? 

               he wanted to learn if she did or didnt

 

she was talking with a woman who stood askance 

                                                     messaged in her spine hipsarms crossed

he had trouble discerning if they engaged in a friendly conversation or argued

the redhead who caught his eyethat was a rarity faced him the other now danced around a bit like she had to use the bathroom 

           he saw then he caught the redheads eye  something beckoned in her face

he strode up 

              talked directly to her We know each other but from where

Danceypants turned a smirk on her facelike a torn page  was not inviting 

                                                                               but he wasnt asking

Red nodded  Yes.  Where?

Excuse me, we were talking. Dancey said

Yes I understand  

                      But Im visiting and refuse to miss this opportunity whether Im correct or mistaken  I assume yare familiar so can reconnect at will  Am I wrong

Ren, are we going to conclude our conversation or do you really want to . .

. . If you don’t mind Susanne, can I call you later?

Danceypants was miffed but she contained itflashed in her face only a moment 

                                                                                    Yes, of course, I understand. I’ll talk with you later.  Excuse me. she said sidestepping him and walked away 

You’re a godsend. he nodded Although I can't say we know you each other.

he laughed his laughter eased her 

                                      Woudnt think itd be hard in broad daylight to recognise a knight in shining armor

Oh, you’re funny . . knighthuh?

Split my time court jester too 

                                  Youll please forgive my forwardness  I saw you at a distance an wanted to confirm I saw wha I saw  I was obvious  An when you recognised I was watching you I had to go all in 

                                                                                                     Play poker

I do.

Then you follow I was committedcoudnt pull my investment back

  Investment.   Is that what you call it?

Believe it or not I havent been curious in a long while 

                                                        Youll have to forgive me satisfying my curiosity

It kills cats.

Luckily Im not a cat 

                     Leaving you to kill me   Joe he extended his hand  Nice to meet you Ren  No W I believe

she shook his hand  No . . no W.  Lucky?

I play poker 

              Anya do look familiar 

You’re visiting and I look familiar?

No  I told your friend I was visiting to throw her off Perhaps Ive seen you around but I havent seen you looking like you look this afternoon 

                      Fetching 

You fetch?

I coud

he interested her in a drink a place she knew   in walking distance

they ordered  talked 

                       the liquor was lubricating

they laughed easily 

Your friend in the park

Yes.

I didnt cause any harm or upset

No. We have a friendly . . a . friendly sparring relationship . she parries, but refuses to thrust.

Yare the thruster

I am.  I’m combative, confrontational . . I have a hard time bringing her along in any of our discussions . . 

. . Doesnt want to hurt anyones feeling or risk being brusque

Yees. it hissed out of her like a balloon going flat  It’s maddening.

Well when you call her this evening you can admit I was rightwe know each other 

I wouldn’t be lying.

Unlike me 

           But you bailed me out thank you

Ren laughed gloriously openmouthed  didnt cover it with her hand  it was infectious  he laughed with her

 

later 

      My friend Susanne is a polack or rather I call her a polack . she’s not really.

No

No. I tease her because she puts vegetables in her meat drawer. 

                                                                      What do you think about that?

 I think he winked maybe she ought to put meat in her vegetable container 

her breath caught Are you suggesting . . what I think . you’re suggesting? now her hand came up over her mouthher eyes startling brightgreen

  I am 

         Anyare not a prude

her hand fell away she laughed deeperlouder than he had heard her all afternoon 

                                                                                     No . I am not.

0946,  Sunday,  11  9. 22

123preferred,  Day-between-Two-Ts,  5  10. 22

  They’re baack. 

                  an inner Mariachi mimicking the classic plaintive Poltergeist pronouncement then they began to chucklereally enjoying their tease

Not funny man

Oh but it is  Thought ya left tha in your wake 

                                                  It was only two days  three strikes an yare outnot two

he didnt have a beef with herhis hisher reasoning 

                                                    but this particular Mariachi relished his errorsexpressed evident delight an amusementpossessed an I-told-ya-so quality an inevitable was at the front of bobbing heads Whas going on wha we looking at that congregated whenever heshe shehe confronted him 

                                                                              Enjoying yourself 

I am smiled any bigger their head might split

I was wrong

 You were 

            Ill give ya five of six is perturbingbetter than eighty percent then zipfive of seven zipfive of eight while occurring within the realm they werent exact but still more than sixty percent Idbet  Zerosixzerosix showed again this morning thas six of nine baby Devils number sixsixsix anon percent 

You woudve bet

I did

      Cleaned up on the clowns round here

I know where this is going

Yes  Careful

             Youve been wrong before shehe heshe giggled    

Don think so

So whaya thinking I cant read your mind like you can read mine

  Exactly

they blushed 

               So wha of it

Nothing 

         Maybe next iteration youll be the Exterior filled to bursting with Internals In the meantime yare one of my Mariachis each of ya bring something unexpected to the table  which I appreciate

Why yare present is beyond me but I enjoy your companydespite occasional provocations  An for tha yare aware I cant get my hands on you 

Around my throat 

Yes

      Yare immune exempted

Lucky me

Lucky youse 

he woke to zerodigitzerodigit 06:06 rearing its head againspreading a hood like a cobra

0606,  Day-between-Two-Ts,  5  10. 22 

0939, Day-between-Two-Ts 

They’re baack.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QOkSvLqkafU 

Iron Butterfly  In the Time of Our Lives  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3hfOwaG2glA