he was becoming musey  Seeing

                                     confirmed it when he read page 29  Cormac McCarthys Stella Maris 

“How many people if they could snap their fingers and vanish would do so? . . . All trace of both being and ever having been.” 

        “To wish oneself never to have been. Again, not the same as no longer to be.   Who was that? Anaximander? Anaximanders conclusion  when considering the underlying foundation of the universe this world has the capacity for infinite plurality  thereby things within our universe are unique   The same for whom?” 

 

he considered disappearing to suicide several times and thought it was his until he read McCarthy

he would concede

who was he

             he wasnt in McCarthys league few were  but he wrote  and in near-vein he wrote How very nice to disappear rather than die  atomise 

                                        he didnt think as McCarthy did  negating ones life their history erased too   he may have been influenced by Ambrose Bierces The Devils Dictionary  Carlos Fuentes  The Old Gringo  example

Bierce left his correspondents job for Hearst publications and riding a horse into Mexico disappeared off the face of the earth   

   lotsa people disappear in Mexico

he conceded

              but was pleased that he and McCarthy concurred

1419,  Martin Luther King, Jr Day – Monday,  16  1. 23

1044,  Twosday,  17  1. 23