its hard to watch friends hurt themselves or deny the common sense they usually display

what messes with that

the heart

physical pain psychic   mind over matter

                                              ifya don mind it don matter

hed managed pain a better part of his life accidental selfinflicted sports it had become inconsequential the anaesthetic he consumedsummonsed came from within  not pills injections his mulish nature proved advantageous

the downsideYes ofcourse there is a downside holistically he turned things over and over like a child discovering the first ball he was given his mulish nature isolated him however his Tarzan swingin in on a vine to his rescue was also his innate introversion  he didnt mind being alone 

                                                     the affront of wellmeaning friends who believed they were welcome their thoughts that being alone meant being lonely didnt bother him evidently it was the suit of clothing they were comfortable in

                he didnt own a suit

he quit trying to explain

it fell on deaf ears

his selfimposed isolation was beneficial

                                           it provided him room to manageassuage his pain when it reared its ugly head

but that was him 

 

one can lead a horse to water but they cant make it drink

he was confident many thought that of him

he did appreciate their concern thanked them

                                                 so he did have a sense of disappointment when he saw friends hurt themselveswhen he watched them blow smoke up their own ass

                                                                    he wasnt that limber not even as a kid

I don’t know that.

She told you she said you were buddies

I don’t know that yet.

                         he was so practised could blow smoke rings out his ass too

1749,  ReggaeFriday,  29  7. 22

1040,  Saturday,  30  7. 22