he was so cocksurelaying down in
bed to go to sleep that hed remember in the morning what he was visualising
right then it was so rarified
how could he possibly forget
he laid there he let the image roamNah roam wasnt correct there was
no room to roamnot in that showerstall in that tiny bathroom in that Kalispell
motel
Fuck me just imagining the confinesthe cheap laminatepaneled partitionwalls the slick
steamsweat on them pukegreen coloured turdtan patches functionalnot aesthetic made
him claustrophobic and claustrophobic warned himbecause he wasnt he had better get the image down before he went to
sleep because his sleep may decide Fuck
you, buddy, ain’t holding your hand through that again, you’re on your own,
cowboy.
Anfuck you I aint nobodys cowboy
he and cowboys didnt mixed
oil and water
hed walk into a bar theyd walk
in they seemed to smell each other
cowboys liked their
boots prided themselves on the skins
they wore on their feet they really liked
them because knocking him off his feet they could kick and stomp
him like prissy lil girls hard soles
hard heels
they rode horseshorses? whores? they liked to rideliked
to be on top they rode because nobody could walk very far in those highheel leathertooled boots
they may have figured they could
take him down quicklike
but his melon was all bone
too bad his skin split as easily as
it did
thoughto be sure it certainly encouraged them all that blood Man they thought hes goindown gonnabe an easy fight
he rope-a-doped without ropes Ali informed
they became brazen
came in too closetoo fast
a right from up off the floor to
the jaw a wicked left hook if it wasnt starslights
out they were suddenly a spider on its back legs arms goin no floorno web then crabbingup coveringup
he wouldnt kick or stomp a man
while he was down
if they were comfortable on their
back they didnt have to get up hed let
them lay
he was mighty grateful cowboys didnt
gang up not usually anif so thats why he wore softsole shoes he could scamper away like a pronghorn
anwhile he often felt like taking on the world
he wasnt
stupid
a bar full of Indians once upon a
time cured him of that notion as a teenager in a Wisconsin reservation tavern
he digressed
a small part of him thought he wouldnt
parlay the image through the night and remember it in the morning
a small part
then he concededhe preferred concurring but none of his apes from their corners or outside
peering in through keyholes dare say it first
useless beasts they shaddup othertimes he couldnt shaddemup
he conceded
he reached onto the wood
feedtrough standing on end beside the bed and took his cellphone in hand
he texted himself
he felt like he was cheating
an ape at the back of his skull bouncing lackluster bored up and down on his neocortex cautioned him to suck it up without
saying a word
mental
telepathy frisson he had that going on with
those mooks but again when they wanted currently
just rooming inside his headstanding around staring like watching a outrageous stripper who
took their breath away or an inept novice wouldnt be cool to laugh at her unchoreographed uninspiring performance stripping is an artform
he texted himself :
: 2 fat naked cowgirls – now the apes speak:
They ain’t fat, they’re big girls, they grow ‘em big in Montana. They’re from hardy
stock. apes ought to
know he considered it for a damaged
heartbeat -- Hardly boys Theyre fat gals
2 fat naked cowgirls in a cheap motel
showerstall . . hadnt a fucking clue how they fit . . he looked on the floor for a shoehorn or an
empty plastic bottle of lubricant . .smelled vaguely of cocoanut oil momentarily
he was tempted pina colada
. . but so much naked
flesh he couldnt distinguish between themwhere one began
and the other ended . . reminded him of oldtime pranks at different colleges where they tried to set state or national records for packing co-eds in a telephone booth
the gals werent appealing
when he woke later in the morning
he didnt remember
he did remember sending himself a
text
OhShit yes Now I remember
crazy that he thought he would
unaided
though he could admit it in
the light of day
0209, Monday,
19 4. 21
345 or
1545, Monday, 19 4.
21
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