bed-ridden

             defiant

that was his grrl

difficult

dire

     defiant

bed-ridden unable to lie flatprone she couldnt breathe her lungs wouldnt work shed suffocate

fuckin ALS

she couldnt talk swallow  ate through a tube  she conceded a bargain with a whitesmocked grinning devilhe cashed her check 

           her breathing was assisted by a ventilator 24/7

he had no concept of 24/7 until then  and he hoped no one ever had to contend with it outside trained nurses their remarkablegymnastic MacGyvering their knowledgeable tagteaming

her facemaskher eyes fomenting above it didnt snuff her voice her voice had been gone for months

they met at Topa Topa in Santa Barbara had a beer together a bite to eat

her last broken words to him were  I love you, Dad.

I love you baby

he didnt know then or did she those would be the last words she ever said to him

he looked in her eyes

                        My defiant little girl I love you so very much

her eyes and eyebrows responded

                                     I love you

Love didnt seem sufficient 

0002,  Saturday,  4  1. 20

1214,  Day-between-Two-Ts,  20  5. 20

Stooges  LA Blues  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ixTgJvP_Q9U 

We Will Fall  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c8ExEu0Z7Aw