they were having coffee on the front porch yakkin

You’ll excuse me, I gotta hit the head.

Rock on

          Refill reheat your coffee

A refill would be nice.

they stood simultaneouslyhe took both mugs

                                                Meetcha back out here

he bounced whole milk off the bottom of his buddys cup took his black went back outside set buddys cup on the metal whiteenameled café table held his as he stood at the railingadmiring a hawk working the sky overhead

What’s going on in the hall outside the bathroom?

Goin on

A shrine, an altar?

Lefties ashes

It’s got the glimmerings of religiousness.

Her place

Strikes me, a memorial for a cat. rolled his eyes like a loon

Yahappen to look above her ashes

   I did not.

The painting there Ive shared with you before

                                                  Painting of a tree

I didn’t notice.

Ought to be more observant tout yourself as being so

                                                         But ya noticed enough  to assume religion

   It looks staged.

Not staged

            Happened   Organically

Paintings been in the hall on the bookcase since midTwentythree Leftie died Tuesday December Tenth

The tree in the painting I saw in Sedona on the grounds of the Amitabha Stupa in Peace Park It is Buddhist

See? Religion.

   Philosophy

                Then I was consumed by the Tibetan prayer flags tha abound on the grounds around the stupa I felt a foreign fullnessmaybe not foreign inside me 

Something like when Im in the mountains

                                             I felt something akin to tha

Akin to the favour an fullness leftie gave me

                                               Which I unfortunately  took for granted  because she was so young

So it is a shrine.

Had you observed in the upper righthand corner of the painting is a hawk tha was not in the photo I asked Collin to take

Anielas spirit animal is a hawkyou havent one  do you

                                                            Mines the buffalo

If a second choice were possibleit is not my second woud be the hawk

Still . . . you insist it is not religious.

Spiritual

            Ought to shaddup  your coffees gettin cold     

1147,  Thursday,  16  1. 25

https://www.piprahwa.com/relics-relic-offerings-sarira#:~:text=These%20bead%2Dlike%20relics%20have,of%20rice%2C%20and%20as%20split

Bitches Brew

he walked up beside her excused himself  selected a bottle of beer from a surprisingly wide variety

she was sipping wine

                        There are glasses in the overhead cabinet.

Thank you the bottles perfect

her nose wrinkled whether she was aware or not

Im Joe  he extended his hand slow on the uptake  she took it

                                                                  I’m Katherine.

K  Katherine

Yes.

Thank you

Why do you ask?

I call people by the name they share first time I ask

                                                        I am not Joseph  Call me tha Ill not acknowledge you                                        

A bit of a stickler?

Downright anal she almost choked on her sip

                                               Now  for threefingers of whiskey Id use a glass

Drinking straight from the bottle at a gathering would be gauche

   Who are you?

Friend of Aisling our host

                           Oh see her Youll excuse me Katherine Shes been involved I havent had the opportunity to say hello thank her for the invite

                                    Pardon me

he came up behind herhugged her hard

she giggled  Joe.

You know it

No one else hugs me from behind.

Turn so I can hug you face to face

she turned they hugged they kissed smiledlaughed

                                                          You’re a handful.

Donya know it

she blushed How you do that.

To get a rise out of ya beautiful the colours so appealing on you 

she blushed harder Would you stop? It isn’t polite to . .

. . To wha

             Assault apepper my host

To . . . somethingmy mind goes blank around you.

Im your temporary amnesia

You’re my something.

   Happily I am

                  Got tellya  An amazing beer selectio . .

. . All in bottles too, I’ve conceded to you.

Conceded nah  Coud we concur

she laughed gayly dimples went deep We can concur.  Screwball.

                                                                     I saw you met Kate.

Katherine  Youre allowed Kate

We go way back. She recently returned. These are her old stomping grounds.

She ever stomp

Stomp?

I imagine you stompinnot her

Stomp. Fair.

                 We met through dance.

Unless RiverdanceI think not not much stomping in those legs as attractive as they are

She’s beautiful.

dully She is

   No interest?

No  I think because she knows you shell be sharp but beyond conversation friendshi . .

. . She’s safe from your marauding ways.

 

Marauding

                Appears your mind has returnedfog amnesia  lifted

   Could I ask?you’ve just met her.

You know her know you I know you

                                           A different calibre

Different caliber. I’m a different calibe . .

. . More so than manymany women  Yaset a high bar

                                                            Katherine doesnt strike me a high jumper

Not tha she cant jump

Well . . . thank you for that.

he smiled

What was the trigger?I know things set you off.

Whine

Wine?

Spelled differently

only girlfriend he had that drank wine he married

                                                     every one before and every woman after his wife diedlong after she died had not nor whined 

Aisling sighed

                  Appears I have my work cut out for me.

You’re a high bar too.

1751,  Wednesday,  15  1. 25

1055,  Thursday,  16  1. 25

Miles Davis  Bitches Brew  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cwcmT_85Gbs

The Fireballs  Bottle of Wine  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I0UVZePwlg0

original  Joe Brown  Bottle of Wine  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4FkbkisG3Po

. . . sonofagun

                     just occurred to him

inside of a week America will become one of the worlds shithole countries

1615,  Wednesday,  15  1. 25

incredulous Again.

                     What did he text?

Something huh?

Would you read it to me again . . . I couldn’t have possibly heard you right.

Ohno, you heard me right.

                             He wrote  Aside from a fuck and murder dream, not to say that babies don’t have them, they’re not tabulae rasae, empty slates, I slept like a baby.

A fuck and murder dream? Sounds nightmarish.

A dream.

What do you mean dream?

He only dreams.

                   Can’t say I’ve ever heard him apply nightmare to any dreams he’s ever had. And he’s had doozies when I’ve pressed him to say what.

He’s given me nightmares.

                                  Only dreams.

Ask him.

About the fuck and murder dream?

Yeah.

         Ask him.

He’ll not text it.

Why?

Because he prefers to share details . exquisitely . during conversation or on a phone call and I really don’t feel like listening to them. You miss me saying he’s given me nightmares?

Have him call me. I wanna know.

                                     Or would that be too much an imposition?

You know, according to him, it never hurts to ask.

Ask. Text him my number.

Awright.

    There you go.

 

Oh shit!

What?

He’d be happy to share just not right now, he’s busy.  A little later.

 

 

his phone rang

                  Clara. Hello. What’s up?

Jesus. Just off the phone with Joe.

He called?

He said he would OhmyGod OhmyGod Ohmy God.

You going to say?

Yeah.  I’ll give you the CliffNotes, ya sittin’ down?

Sitting down? Really?

Ohshit really yeah.

Lemme sit down.

                   There.

Sex. Murder.

             Allison.  He learned her name from the dream while admitting she was a complete stranger to him, you remember names of strangers in your dreams?

No.

Me neither, her name’s Allison. He said she was an abundant honeyblonde and he isn’t usually attracted to blondes.

No he’s not.

Allison has a pistol, revolver, a long barreled one.

                                                     When they go to bed she insists he usesfucks her with the loaded gun his finger on the trigger.

What?

Fuckedup, yeah?

                  While she fingers herself he makes her fellated it and when she’s all wet he fucks her with it fucks her ass then tosses it beside her head when he digs in on her since she’s cum numerous times an crazyfucking sensitive.

Jesu . .

. . Wait! Wait.

                They’re in a motel. The door gets kicked open head of the bed on the wall beside it her exboyfriend comes raging in while theyre fucking . . . Allison’s on her back snatches up the revolver and as her ex leans down to grab her she jams it in his gullet fires blows his head off bone shards brain shower of blood drops the gun body topples away from the bed.  They keep fucking.

                                        Nightmare right?

Eventually police catch her.

She confesses.

Forensic confirms her story.

They have conjugal visits raucous fucking she grips prison bars as he takes her from behind.

   The description of her ex’s head blowing up was over the top graphic pulled no punches.

                                                                                                    Jesus.

You okay?

You didn’t sa . .

. . I said he said he slept like a baby . . . aside from a fuck murder dream.

7AMish,  Wednesday,  15  1. 25

1217,  Wednesday

she said What do you mean he can’t meet us for breakfast?

he said I told you I didn’t want to extend the invitation, he’d turn me down, us down.

Breakfast is on us.

It doesn’t matter.

Since when does free eats not matter?

He’s busy. He’s busy every day until sometime in the afternoon, sometimes until, though not very often, early evening. Busy.

He has to eat.

He has dinner. He likes to prepare his own food.

Makes no sense.

That it makes sense to him is all that matters, how does he say it? It’s not agenda, no. Hell. Can’t think right now.

He’s selfish.

I don’t like defending him but let me say this because I can hear him in my head; he’d say we’re all selfish. And that would be true.

                You’re upset he's refusing to meet us but that’s because you'd like him to eat with us and he’s rejecting us, you don't like to be rejected, denied.

                                            Selfish.

But not selfish of you?

No.

     You asked me to ask him despite me telling you he’d say no.

   What is he doing?

He’s writing.

Every day?

Every day.

Some type of vanity project?

he laughed

             He’s the least vain person I know, no, he draws no attention to himself. He does it for himself.

He’s ridiculous.

I agree.

         But we’ll not influence him one iota.

He only does what he wants to do.

And I mean only.

                  So yeah.   Selfish.                                 

1052,  Monday,  13  1. 25

1052,  Wednesday,  15  1. 25

our children they the worlds collective children raised at a deficit

                                                                   or

deficient kids  not by their doing

                                    but

by doing of their world parents if they dont push back hard

of schooling

of society

           which appears intent on raising gaggles of uninspired uninterested dullards

now that said

               it could simply be the ruling classes want to be servedserviced by peasants peons serfs like Once upon a historical time explicitly before Gutenbergs printing press 1455 he printed the Gutenberg Bible explicitly before the masses learned to read and write

his generation valued valued by their parents was educated by the Three R’s reading ‘riting ‘rithmetic

                                                                                                           now

audiobooks  Why learn to read if youre read to?

keyboarding Why pickup a pencil pen? when a struggle to print or write cursive longhand  suffer inferior vocabularies suffer the ability to sound out words lack phonetics overall reinforced by social media shorthand

                                                                                                        Ye for yes

LOL

      acrimonious acronyms  emojis  simpleminded hints simple pictorial attempts to express their emotions because they havent the words to express themselves

Why sweat arithmetic? have calculators abstraction is confusing  who wants to be confused

                                                                                                  growingup he did

Why this harangue?

talking with a friend he learned that her grandchild was attending an afterschool  extracurricular curriculum again 

Cursive Club

                learning to write cursive

not calligraphy

simple cursive

not in school

   blew his mind

1550,  Monday,  13  1. 25

1000,  Wednesday,  15  1. 25

he had pushed herpushed her hard

   lost her coolblew  her cool

                                  You’re so rude.

I am

flummoxed  You . . you’re . you’re ruthless.

I am

   You’re unapologeti . .

. . If an apology is warranted Id give it

                                            My ethics are stringent

You’r . .

. . An equal opportunity offender

   Hello

What am I supposed to sayexpected to say to that?

Nothing Not a damn thing

                               Not a damn thing

she made a puss

he suppressed the temptation to say Whas with the puss puss

                                                                    but withheld it

also tampeddown a ridiculousdesire to take a phone snapshot

if she saw what he saw shed turn insideout

                                                it was not flattering                                             

and she was a very attractive woman

                                           unless  obviously   crossed

1752,  Monday,  13  1. 25

she was her mothers executor

                                walked into her mothers bedroom and found her niece and her aunts on her mothers side going through her mothers jewelry

What are you doing?

her niece  I was showing my aunts Gram's jewelry.

I see that. Why?

   Well, her jewelry is going to be dispers . .

. . Not by you.

                No.

But I thought . .

. . You thought.   What?

she bit her lip

What?

   You don’t think. This is my mother’s jewelry and she has shared with me who gets what. Your aunts aren’t getting anything, they weren’t named, and I take distinct offense you brought them into her bedroom in her home with the intention that they were welcome to pick and choose what they want.

They get nothing.

she sat on the bed with her aunts  said nothing

Go.

her niece cleared her throat Gram . .

. . Gram nothing.

Go.

     Too Bad. So Sad.

his sister related this with him

Too bad so sad

Yes.

Who do you think you are

Who do I think I am?

Yah

      Ya think youre me

his sister burst out laughingsplit a gut

he joined her laughter

                            We might sppose were our mothers children

Ya think?

I know

1419,  Monday,  13  1. 25

1614,  2sday,  14  1. 25

she was telling him about her experiences in Montessori

they were discussing education

                                   he told her it wasnt until after college that he heard about it and maybe had he been informedhad learned of it while in college he would have stayed in the curriculum to become a teacher

though curriculum had been its deathknell

dropped that first course

the Registrar reimbursed him for it and all his textbooks a considerable amount of money

took that money and invested it in a buddys startup business

                                                                   Apogee handcrafted bongs

they made a killin

I didnt know you taught at a Montessori

Yes. It was held in a church basement.

Generous of the church

Not so.

How do you mean

Some of the children were disabled. Disabled by polio. Walked with the aid of leg braces, some on crutches. Down stairs.

Down  Stairs

Yeah.

There wasnt a freight elevator  elevator

No.

   Was there ever an accident

Not while I was there.

Sppose it makes sense

Sense?

          How do you mean?

If a kid went down a flight of stairs

Who woud sue God

1052,  2sday,  14  1. 25

Felons Executive Time

legacy media was reporting on Felons forthcoming  Day One  Shock and Awe                                                                                                                               https://apnews.com/article/trump-day-one-border-executive-actions-30f78c3c983ae74555f281446fe22710?cid=eml_howtowin_%7Bdate%28%E2%80%98yyyyMMdd%E2%80%99%29%7D

   best clowny can put together is an Awshucks

                                                              coud suck a haystraw while hes at it

Yah

      he intended to oppose him at every turn he was able to

even wrote Felon at Truth Social to ask him how long he intended his new Executive Times would be during his lame-duck term

            explained he was definitely expecting it  a cherished holdover from Felons last golf-riddled term

1253,  2sday,  14  1. 25

https://www.axios.com/2019/02/03/donald-trump-private-schedules-leak-executive-time

Christ. What are you doing?

leaning against a kitchen counter he looked left

                                                  she stood at its threshold bundledup in the bed looking like a Wookiee

he smiled

Don’t you laugh at medon’t you dare it’s freakin’ cold.

Not in bed as I said as youre proving

                                           Watchin the steam cominoff the coffeemaker

Fascinating

             Same kind of fascination one enjoys while watching logs burn in a fireplace

Well have coffee inside five

Go back to bed  Ill bring you your coffee

It’s cold.

Suns climbing the sky Itll warm

You’re not turning on the heat?

No

You won’t turn it on for me?

No

Not for me.

Not for anyone

                 I told ya wha youd have to brave

What if I said I was dressing and going home?

Want me to bring your coffee to your place

   You’re not kidding.

You know me better thantha

   Ill bring your coffee to bed we can cuddle  Ill warm ya

And if I put my cold feet on your belly?

Ill warmem

I’m not bluffing.

I know you better thantha

Goddammit. Goddammit. Goddammit.

Three letters

               Ill guess Y and   E  an S   Be right there

You’re such a fuck.

Yes

     Were good together

Head in right there

You ain’t all that mister.

Though apparently enoughGo

sighed  shuffled into and down the hall

   Kiddo he thought  shes an awfully good sport

0914,  2sday,  14  1. 25