he should have paid more attention
to his body than to the old North Chicagoland neighbourhood he walked through through the oak and elm chestnut sassafras maple catalpa and beech
but it was
Fall the leaves were fantastic aflame coloured yellow red ochre shivering
and trembling in the windsome letting-go ahead of an oncoming rain
he turned up his coat collar
against the crispness jabbed his hands deep into his pockets
as he walked he became fascinated
too by slightlybroken the crackled tongues of concrete drives that ran down
to the side streets between the parkway lawn and trees
there were very few blacktopped
drives
when he came upon one it stuck
out blatantly marring the neighbourhoods picturesque overture had he been an immediate neighbour he would
have not only campaigned bitterlycomplaining about the lost beauty but also that their decision to blacktop denigrated
their property value and his
Ah
in
his pocket he fingered a stone his daughter gave him a blue lace agate it brings gentleness to the spirit
she felt he needed to be more gentle
to himself and others he was brusque often angry as she interpreted his remarks
he smiled at her very warmly when
she gave it to him You wanna tell me
that not every hill is a hill to die on
Yes. You take things personally.
You’re ardent. I don’t want your anger diminishing you.
It wont baby Its the furnace I keep my fire inkeep my
water hot Its passion
You wouldnt want me to diminish
my passion
Passion, Dad? I don’t know that
passion, and anger, are synonymous.
Baby theyre as synonymous as love and hatetwo sides
of the same coin or a keenlyhoned razors
edge separating its faces
bemused she smiled
her dimples dimpling
Thank you love Ill keep it with me always to remind me to try
to be calm
Thank you, Dad, you’re welcome. I just don’t want your er passion ha to express itself,
make you ill; it’s stress no matter how you want to paint it.
Ill keep that in mind too
You will. I know you’re mindful.
Yes I am
gentle
spirit
turning his eye from the
occasional eyesore he also recognised that trees which grew on peoples front
lawns were either encircled by low fieldstone or loose paver walls which enhanced
their stature appearance making them seem to be sitting tall on pedestals or they were runabout by bricks stood on their edges within them grew a variety of grasses or
stands of flowering plants some were
bedded with the lush deepgreen foliage of Lily of the Valley others were surrounded by naked black loam
churnedoverturned the simple care to aerate
their roots
Ah
he should have listened to his
body rather than getting caught up the yards and trees and homes
as the rain began to fall while he tapped his kidney -- if he were
blind hed know his grandchildren because the girls always told him before they went
on a walk with him that they tapped kidneys We pushed until we blew air, Grampa – he failed
to pay attention to the quietweight in his guts
and as the rain fell he cramped but the cramping wasnt sustained if only it sustained itself a halfblock more he wouldnt have shit himself
rubbing the blue lace agate in his pocket he sighed Vonneguts trademark Oh well, oh well, oh well.
now he had something to do that
afternoon when not too long prior he wondered what he would do when he returned
from his walkwhen he was back to the home he was housesitting for a friend
1114, Day-between-Two-Ts, 28 8.
19
1249,
Monday, 23 9. 19
