dreaming  Quit composing  woudya

                                                 mete out clearly  sharply

words woke him

                   could suppose they gave him permission to use the head

urinating he thought  he was composing   Chainsaw  Hacksaw  Buzzsaw

                                                                                 Chain  Hack  Buzz

coud hearem bitch in the bedroom Don’t call us that.

they could read his mind But yawere ya absolutely were  Pulled my ass out of a going-one-way sling

Don’t call us that.  Please.

                             they werent really worried they knew he wasnt partial to nicknames

hed only use them in the future teaching lessons  or to recall his deep affection for them his respect that they saved his ass

You were truly magnificent

                              Say thank you

they chuckled conspiratorially

                                  No biggie Daddy-O, no biggie.

 

    fast asleep  awakened

                                               noise   in the livingroom

he sat up two cats were poised at the foot of the bed their attention riveted on the hall livingroom beyond

                                                                                                               queen sat on the steamer trunk under the window she too was fixated on the doorway hallway

he slipped out of bed

was naked

    didnt do the cinema HELLO  WHOS THERE

cats primedremained steadfast  eyes big their vision working the dark

silently he went up the hall into the livingroom

                                                no sooner stepped inwas rocked by a fist on the temple staggeredthrew a hand outcaught the sofa table eyes went to his coach coachs eyes convinced him he gathered himselfdidnt dropped though some element wanted him down  he was yanked off the tablespun right into a telegraphed haymaker meant for his face tucked his chin took the brunt on the forehead widows peak that couldnt have been comfortable was rocked backwards into flurry of kidney punches glanced again coachs eyes convinced him  he spunthrew an elbow caught bone skull  was banged forward a knee meant for his balls turned his hip took it on the thighbehind him a hiss from Hell shriek queen shreddingclimbed an assailants back bit his neck slashed his face with both paws claws took an eye assailant to his right  tom a heavyweight  slammed into the outside of his knee it turned inwardcrumpled he fell tom lacerated his shins thighs bit his hands as he tried to fend him off coach nodded but his leg collapsedhe hit the wall with his shouldertook heavy claws upcross his back then he was light and the guy before him with the bad hand wrist was slow to get his arms up avoid the buzzsaw of claws that raked his chest throat lips face a bloody slicedslashedfuckin mess rendered in seconds

                                                  cats leapt away growling deep in their throats  hissing  backs arched

fuckedup three hit the doordoorjambs stumbled out cryingmoaning they escaped down the hill

looked at coach 

                  put a stool down in his corner

    Chain  Hack  Buzz

                            Don’t call us that.

    

0534,  reggaefriday,  20  12. 24

1052,  reggaefriday

FRAGILE

                     printed clearly on a cardboard box mailed for Christmas containing cookies

is the same kind of thing as a woman telling a man NO

0833,  reggaefriday,  20  12. 24

he knew wha shaped his question

hed bet friend forgot weekanahaf thought leftie was one of the outdoor ferals

    Death   Or oblivion

Jesus. I get up, topoff my drink, and walk into this?

Yacoud simplify itknow ya don like to work tha hard

                                                         Toss a coin    Dead head  cleverhuh

Yeah. No.   No. I think I’d like to give it some thought.

                                                                Why the question?

Obviously was playin with oblivion

                                         Oblique occurred to meliked its look   Gave it a little twist

Oblique live on  obliqueliveon

Deads dead

               Maybe not oblivion obliqueliveon

    Why do you do that?to irritate me?

No  How can ya not

                       Words Building blocks toy building blocks  Thoughts sentences paragraphs parcels for poems essays short stories songs books   literature

State of being unaware  Unconscious of what is happening

                                                                   Your ceaseless annoying semantics

Resistance  Opposition

Death  Oblivion

I got a coin

    You know.  

                   Maybe I will.

Quarter comes back to me  Tails is a buffalo

I think I’ll go with your clever dead head.

                                              he flipped it high

Absolutely heads

Fiftyfifty.

Absolutely heads

pissed him off

                heads                                        

That’s not proof of absolute.

For thacall it was

That’s not proof.

Ive got a theorem confirms absolute   Proven by a chain of reasonin . .

. . I know what it is.

Like a song you do

    What’s your theorem?

You absolutely   woudnt have sex with a guy

1500,  Wednesday,  18  12. 24

432preferred to 1632,  Thursday,  19  12. 24

1937  Meyer Shapiro  Nature of the Abstract

Abstraction: The pure form once masked by extraneous content was liberated.

semantics

             extraneous content

pure form

             essence essense  revealed   released

unbound

purity

         which desires as he must is not absolute though he still pushed it it is also why he does not gamble

    absolute  oxygen in his veins

he liked figurative art

he liked photography

                       neither which he could dowanted to do because he was attracted to things unseen which incorporate the necessity of imagining whaelse could behad hid cloaked itself   in the shadows shade

    reminds him of Rorschachs

 

Wha do you see

What do you see?

Im not going to say because you might renegemight Awyah.  I can see that.

I wouldn’ . .

. . Yawoud

              Yado

I relate a story whether its nonsensical or actual or actualembellished fiction rises from nonfiction non from fiction I ask you to tell me a story

You don

Yacant

    You have better stories.

Its not a competition

                       But you seeI believe it is fair to say  most things in that light

Zero Sum

    Im opposite

 

Look again

 

What do you see

    Yeah.  I’m not playing.

2214,  Sunday,  3  11. 24

1140,  Thursday,  19  12. 24

It’s semantics.

To you

            One mans semantics anothers bane  In my case annoyance

I annoy you?

Yado

       I like words to describe detail  concrete accretions    Committed

You skate

    You enjoy being a contrarian.

Correction

             Thadbe cuntrarian   Accurate

Soitenly more playful  Stooges

I know.

Wasnt sure you did

Howbout we change up?

Im listening

The coming inauguratio . .

. . Coronation

it looked like he glowered it looked like he glowered

                                                   Did you glower

    Glower?  Made a face.

Angry Sullen   Scowl he chuckled

                                       Semantics 

    So   I interrupted

You frequently do.

I do  Otherwise we find ourselves waitinround for you

                                                            The coming whasoever

You think there’ll be buyers’ remorse over the next year?

B S

    B S?  Bullshit?

No

Explain.

    Buyers sorrow  an Im not helpinem out one bit

Too whahaveyou think theyve won something beat someone a game  it aint

                                                                                 Wish they only fucked themselves over

But they fucked us too

the remnantglower evaporated

overnight,  Thursday,  19  12. 24

0951,  Thursday

 lefties home

1340 hrs yesterday

li’l screwball  somehow she was assigned Lifty and Liftie     Really

 

being infatuated

     not facilitating

 

2043,  Wednesday,  18  12. 24

Iron Butterfly  Most Anything You Want  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5QZdITJX6I0

    they   he loved they  they gave them cover

                                                          they gave him too much lead time

if they wanted to hang him out to dry they should have come for him hardfirst 

they thought theyd torture him

Question

               What’s the most desirable thing in the world?

clowns ahead of him stumbled dupes

                                        but   looking over them  at back of the room   those  beyond  leering like wolves setting a kill

    And you?

Me

Quit stalling.

Id say the most desirable thing in the world  is

                                                      Years of accumulatedunmolested    dust

1958,  Wednesday,  18  12. 24

she walked out of the shadows thrown by trees into the wash of the sun

                                                                                a midday  summerJuly sun

that irradiated the fat sand sparkling in the concrete ciliate motes whirling at her ankles her calves churned by her daughters to each side  holding hands

                                           the children were mongoloids

they were lost in the midst of fast conversation

                                                   their smileslaughter rapidly coursingcrossing their faces  FUN made him smile as they chattered

he enjoyed their ease  natural  genuine

                                               Wha word to colourem he thought Not coloured between the linesNo  tha woud not do

    WatercolouredYes  diffuse   moving where the moistwash drew them

they were oblivious to the people who stepped wideround them

                                                                   passersby who were unnatural uncomfortable  averted their eyes impulse to stare  acting asif theyd contract the girls condition

passersby

             failing to recognise their fortune

                                                                     

 accuse    

Wednesday,  13  7. 05

1403,  Wednesday,  18  12. 24

Loudmouth Loudermilk complicit asshole releases a horseshit report

                                                                          excuse me HORSESHIT REPORT

https://www.pbs.org/newshour/politics/watch-jan-6-panel-releases-video-of-rep-loudermilk-leading-a-capitol-tour-day-before-attack

1523,  Wednesday,  18  12. 24

https://www.axios.com/2024/12/18/cheney-criminal-investigation-house-republicans-jan-6-report

he liked Oblivion

                        some spelled it  O B L I V I O N

he spelled it

                 H A S H I S H  &  B U F F A L O T R A C E  &  B O U R B O N  B A R R E L- A G E D  S T O U T

D R A G O N ‘ S  M I L K

                            he liked gettin where he was going  slowly incrementally   with all internal baggage banginround reminding him wheres hes beenwhere he iswhere hes going

                                                                               which   didnt impress him in the least

oblivion has texture

                      curvature

like fuckin a Playmate from the Fifties when he wasnt fuckable

                                                                    do not try to curb his enthusiasmimagination

hedcutya

             not a threat
a promise

L O A D E D

                 I spell it right

How else would you spell it?

    Me

          G O A D E D

got to dig aidesadvisors  chemicals  who fly in out of leftfield   brighten my day

                                                                                       a day without sunshine is shit

    it took him to leave the Midwest to appreciate SUN shine

winter  cold   dour

                       Midwest had chose for him

he hadnt chose for himself

    then he did

                  anthought he was a fuckin genius

THIS

       reminded him of when he was a teenagerAGER

                                                            like years meant shit

he was headstails beyond shit

                                  had been informed by hard men who likely crossed some fuckinlines to inform him  defend   him

BE YOU

         Be You  ought to be a commandment

                                                   to his thinkin

but he was high

2007,  Tuesday,  17  12. 24

2235,  Tuesday

    shit keeps creepin in

Whasthis

Keep your voice down

    Whasthis

I . . weve no idea

                    You know how things percolate in his mind

Out of leftfield

Definitely

            I hazard ya havent been round long enough to to appreciate his cognations

Anbest appreciate when I say cognations Im saying nations

                                                                When Pangaea separatedbusted up into landmasses those lands tha became nations have nothing on him

languages  customs

                        fuckanything fuckeverything seem to occur to him

Out of leftfield

    Out of the fuckinblue

what dribbledwhat  disturbed them was

                                             DISTURBED

                                               TURBID

                                              

                                             DISTURBID

                                              WATERS

Wha are disturbid waters

Wha do you understand

                           Cuz your guess is as good as the rest of uss guesses

Seems pat

             I think wha hes seeingremembering is the turquoisecoloured frigid I D  water of the Kenai River

Disturbid  Frigid

    I remember

                  But you werent here yet

No

    But Ive discovered his memories are ours if we apply ourselves

Yes

     Though some of usfor whaever reason fail to have tha ability anare dependent of others  like yourself   to share

    Sharin

1605,  Monday,  16  12. 24

1500,  Tuesday,  17  12. 24

ifnot a Record  a personal recordblew his mind

                                                      to be fair  that didnt take much

he was all-in on the impossible Im-possible unlikely  unexpected

so when it salliedup

he embraced it

                 tied it up with knots he learned in shibari

OVERREACH

               cant tieup hardboiled eggs  but

he peeled four JUMBO eggs inside one minute

                                                 slapped them with flat of a butterknife rolled them in his palmsthen  literally

          unsheathed themliterally

he couldnt remember something happening that quick since he stripped when a Nordic blonde in Miami told him to undress because she wanted to fuck him in the worst way

                                                               on a livingroom floor

in someones apartment she knew that they partied with

took a week for their rugburns to heal

                                         not that that stopped their torrid weeks-long fucking until her boyfriend Thor – NO SHIT – returned from Maryland – none the wiser

2302,  Monday,  16  12. 24

1419,  Tuesday,  17  12. 24

https://goop.com/wellness/sexual-health/what-is-shibari/?srsltid=AfmBOooebMpRJ-3wamlDSfKPoDjgpX07uQVJAJPN9iEJXpxU4uKKBonk

https://www.shibariacademy.com/pages/basic-knots

grim

    DANGER

                 the danger is the anger incorporated in the word  d-anger

a derangement of anger

                         in it  in that   Der-ANGERment

anger incorporated

                     embodied

and asadze  anger is emotional

                                    the person tends to be irrational

thereby

          battlefield danger comes out of everywhere

enemy fire

friendly fire

unfriendly fire

                 endgame

if fortunate

             Death

if unfortunate

                Maimed  Disabled  Disfigured    for Life

    warriors dont fear death

                              he she fears disfigurement he fears emasculation

a healthy young body

disabled

disfigured

dis-spised

dis-spied

             Who wants to look at that?

suffer the ramifications of being tolerated  THE LOOK

                                                          I can tolerate you rate you grade you

because you  dis-whahaveya  lack the capacity to tolerate me . . .

                                                                          GET IT

                                                                     DO YOU GET IT

by your disability unability inability

                                       you are less

thereby  I can TOLERATE YOUbecause

                                             frankly  honestly

I cant lose you in a crowd you stick out like a sore thumb

                                                             I may try to lose you

if I fought a war

                  I wouldnt want to fire killing shotsNO  Id want to shatter your spine  rob you of a lifetime standing upright  getting around unaidedcripple you  disable maim disfigure

                                                                          so in the light of day flinch at your wound  then

Ive killed you day-in day-out

marked

marred

         youll always remember that Day

           indelibly etched in your mind

therein lies the terror-work

dependent on the “kindness” of others

no matter how independent you think you are  

Tuesday,  25  7. 06

1236,  Tuesday,  17  12. 24

when somethings Good too Good to passup   he didnt

Francis Perkins said “The people are what matter to government, and a government should aim to give all the people under its jurisdiction the best possible life.”

https://heathercoxrichardson.substack.com/p/december-16-2024

not terrorise them

not be cruel

              however many American politicians wannabe Cabinet members billionaires are intentionally cruel because they couldnt become who they are if they werent sociopaths-psychopaths or

                                                                                                     redundant cruel motherfuckers

1326,  Tuesday,  17  12. 24

she came upleaned on the top of his cubicle

                                                Alright you, you’re attending, get up.

Get up Christ whayawant from me briskly eyed her breasts plumped against the cubicle edge

    Wha does get up mean  We literal or figurative

Leave it to you.  Literally would be trouble for us under her breath not that I’d mind so let’s opt for the flipside of the coin, shall we?

If we shall I don see how Im needed Not my department or my responsibilities

You’re not aware but most everyone attends.  You’re the glaring exception.   And since you work for me now and since you’re a reflection of me . . . you’ll neverever have to guess what these meetings entail . . because you’ll be there.

Screw brisk he thought  eyeballed her breasts  sighed   I suppose bossDD

she blushed

colour looked good on her

                            not tha hed say

 

seated at an enormous conference pleasantries exchanged down to business  brass tacks an all

his clipboard paper red BIC pen was out

upper left corner he wrote Thursday and the date and the time

                                                                  the room quieted

without lookingup he said Im listenin  I don need to look at anyone to hear them

Agree

the speaker cleared his throat

                                  I . . I just want to be clear . I want your attention.

Got it  though I might hear more than I need to know

                                                        Careful where you tread  Might possibly  inadvertently  open a can of worms

Which is my expertise

                          Plumbing whamight not want to be plumbed

Certainly thas in my personnel file

    You were sayin

he lookedup

              his bossDD sat across from him arms crossed over her chest  he thought BOO  smiled amicably

she didnt

he expected words afterwards

 

as the gentleman from a different department than his spoke he wrote haltingly asif making detailed notes

I sit in on meetings    that have nothing to do with me                                                                                                                                     I sit  because      Im part of a hole

misspelled it on purpose    that somehow Im believed an intrinsic part                   but apart    from

it comes under my sense of not wanting          to belong          to a group that would have me as part of it

Groucho

 

    AFTERWARDS   AFTERWORDS

                                           I want to see you in my office.

Im getting a cup of coffee Can I get you one

I don’t know it’ll be that long.

Oh

     Its gonnabe tha long

Two creams two sugarcubes

                                  I pay attention bossDD 

the harassment begins

one side of the coin or the other

27  7. 06

1129,  Tuesday,  17  12. 24