he woke stubbornlyout of an erotic dream to the bingbing sound of an incoming texthe sighed deeply leaving behind what he was leaving behind

october was nestled between his legsup against his groin

his girlfriend texted to say she was up

she was notorious for sleeping through her alarmshe was notorious for waking just before his alarms went off  then he was up on his two feet

she didnt know how he did it

he told her he attributed it to working as a paperboy for eleven yearsseven days a weekpenny a papertwo cents on Sunday  that stretch broken up only by broken legs  broken arms an broke fingers an noses didnt cut any slack

he worked around those

he set his alarm for her for eightthirty

she texted at eightseventeen

if she hadnt he would probably have awaken at eighttwenty eighttwentyfive

he turned to his right and grabbed his cell off the nightstand an endonend woodannibbledgnawed feeding trough

he texted  :  Good morning, baby! You’re out of bed?

:  im up in adam

she teased

hed said up in adam for years rotely  the words leaving his mouth without him thinking of them

then he stopped himself one day  an repeated outloud what came out of his mouth Up In Adam Whaddafuck  Im not Im I mean  Up  And  At  It    WhyamI saying up in adam

overhearing him laying beside him she laughed Thats what Ive always wanted to knowsince the first time I heard you say it

CHRIST Why didntya ask

I suspected you said so only to intimates  a quirkan affectation

Jesus Throw me a bone   When I make an ass out of myself tell me

I didnt find it assworthy  It was cute  an youre rarely cute

Fuuuck I hate cute

And thats probably all the more why I didnt say so

he was cutehe needed cute like he needed a hole in his head

he reached down to pet octobers head

she tried to avoid his handshe was feral  only a month in the house

he retried and grabbed an ear  See  Still stuck to your head girl thats a good thing

she batted at his hand withholding her nails 

she was learning

he texted  :  I love that you’re up in adam, baby.  Feet on the ground?

:  grounded

he relaxed  she was on her own  but she was still notorious  it was only one battle in a long war

turning again he laid the cell beside the alarm clock and depressed the lever that killed the alarm

laying back october remained between his legs so he kept on pulling her earpetting her 

maybe  just maybe  she purred 

then he placed his hand on the covers at his waist and looked over it at her calico facecalicoes fascinated him  she was the first he ever cared for  his daughter had one Elmo  Elmo lived sixteen years died a month before she gave birth to her first daughtershe always said that she took Elmo in a barn kitty to prove to herself that she could care for another living thing  she didnt dare want a child being the first living thing she ever cared for  with Elmos help she also cared for Aeros a German Shepherd who died very young of gastric torsion and Takota another fine German Shepherd who capably filled the wound and gap that Aeros’ death made      

musing of his daughter he became aware that octobers eyes were fixedskewed to the space to his right

he watched her

she definitely watched something

definitely

Awshit he thought  I hope she not watching a ghost 

animals cats dogs can see ghosts

theyre easily within their realm

its human beings with their big brains that either can or cant an more often dont  dont want to acknowledgeor fear  that they share the world with the immaterial  who for their own reasons throw off their cloaks an appear  they walk move fly hover  with the sublime agility as only they can

the house had three ghostthree roommates thats what they called them  an they were grateful they shared the space without enmity with patience  times with humour

itd be like one of them now in bed to be seen by october  her feralness making her closer to them than he could ever be

Times up he muttered softly  he had to look an see what she was looking at  he hoped it wasnt one of their heads disembodied laying beside his  weightless  looking at him

he turned his head

his heart in his throat

he saw

october intently watched the secondhand of the alarm clock move through time in its staccato fashion

0817,  Day-between-Two-Ts,  7  3.18

1157,  Saturday,  10 3. 18

cunts fastgrowing culpability is verging on shooting fish in a barrelan yet  despite the presidents ties to the NRA

it seems hes choosing to hang him 

mebbe he ought to reconsiderhe wont

mebbe he ought to overdosesucceed in his vanity

which ultimately if delusions like dreams can come true would allow him to lie in state  in an open coffin  beheld by a grieving Nation  dewyeyed  breastclutching   attract somber leaders from across the World

Ye  the Galaxy  

cunt knowing deep in his nut  he would be provided the pomp and circumstance befitting a National American hero

There will never to be another like him

Thank Gawd  one was plenty

1146,  Twosday,  6  3. 18

1154,  Thursday,  8  3.18

1049 days remaining or fewer

https://www.msnbc.com/rachel-maddow/watch/adviser-to-uae-cooperating-with-robert-mueller-investigation-nyt-1178668099835?playlist=associated

https://www.msnbc.com/the-last-word/watch/trump-ally-calls-president-s-behavior-pure-madness-1177593411778

cunt  a.k.a. David Dennison  a.k.a. Mike Flanagan  http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/liar/n9461?snl=1

Todays International Women’s Day and in reverence to women the President said . . .

sounds like a beginning to a jokedoesnt it

John Kelly his White House Chief of Staff called women sacred

                                                               THAT sounds like a beginning of a joke too

1306,  Thursday,  8  3. 18

poaching

https://www.vox.com/2018/3/7/17091000/ban-lifted-elephant-trophy-hunting

awright  cunt reverses himself on elephant-hunting  a case-by-case basis   when there is no basis for slaughtering elephants

            it begs one to ask . . . if the elephant in the room  is the president . . .

1256,  Thursday,  8  3. 18

It took their wives to die for them to get together again.

That’s a horrible thing to say.

Sometimes the truth is horrible.

they were trying to keep up in one anothers life

one had remarried

the other was maintaining a long distance relationship that no one could get their heads aroundnot that it was theirs to understand approve or remark on

when theyd get tantalisingly close he told them they were on thin ice he didnt question their relationships he assumed knowing them as he did that they werent abject idiotsmiserable in their relationships No one has to be unhappy Im not

for their trying often at weeks removed they did finally assemble at local breweries and enjoy what oneFourth Quarter called a putsch

What the fuck is thatputsch  sounds like something I wouldnt want to step inhave to scrap off my shoes with a stick

A putsch

Saying it again isnt saying what it is  Ill be deliberate What is a putsch

It is a violent attempt to overthrow a government  The Beer Hall Putschappropriate huh was the failed coup attempt by Hitler why he went to jail . .

. . Where he wrote Mein Kampf

Exactly

Putsch  Didnt know that  But then we usually tell each other something we didnt know prior to getting together

Its nice  And considering our current state of affairsthe prick in officethe other pricks hes putting in charge of departments theyve publicly intimated they want to see destroyed  having a putschI thought was perfect to call our time together We always share a beer

Yes always have a beer  Oils the jaws an tongue an foments the mind

Exactly

You use exactly a lotdont apologise  I prefer exactly to riiight  I have no idea when that entered our American vernacular  Makes everyone who uses it sound like a dizzy blondenot to stereotype

Quick with not to stereotype

Yabetcha  I know everyone is themselves an therell never be another like them  but you do have to have a filing systema thresher to separate the chaff from the kernels

A thresher  I dont know if many people know what a thresher is today

Awh  grew up not far from McCormicks Cantigny  theres a fantastic agriculture machinery museum  I loved looking at their Paleolithic steel skeletons an bones  An in that bent I talked with a teenager yesterday who didnt know who Jimi Hendrix was or even if he knew Jiimis musicfuckin unAmerican  I told his old man he wasnt holding up his end as the boys father

How did you get to Jimi

Creedence Clearwater Born on the Bayou it was playing above us an I mentioned to them it was nice to hear Creedence playing  Father nodded  Kid went blank  I said You know CCR Creedence double e Creedence  Creedence Clearwater Revival  the band whose song is playing over our heads

Man fuckin unAmerican

You didnt say that

I didnt say that

You wanted to say that

I wanted to say that

Usually you would

Usually  but not while Im working

Yeah There is that

Yeah I was temptedI dont like my history not recognised Worse  not known  This aint ancient shit I knew the music preceding me  Whats life without music  Ignorance

Fourth Quarter nodded

You were a teacher  What are they teaching kids nowmy girls are both almost twenty years out of high schoolyou retired three years ago

Four years

Aint twenty your fingers closer to the pulse

I taughtwhich you know was an extension high school  Troubled kids

Pregnant girls arent troubled  They just trouble the community

Yes  There is that too

Howbout faith  What do you have faith in

Faith  Why do you want to go there 

Well politics sex religion  Whats the point of a putsch if we cant touch all the hot spots there are to touch that are typically dissuaded declined for polite company  we aint polite

No  A putsch isnt polite

BINGO

Faith

Yes faith

I have faith in myself my sons  I like to believe I have faith in my familysisters an brother  though Id be dishonest if I didnt say I temper that faithdont put too much on itinvest too much in them

he hmmd in agreement

And you  What do you have faith in

I have faith theres no god

Monday evening,  5  3. 18

1357,  Twosday,  6  3. 18

CCR  Born on the Bayou  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wIjUY3pjN8E

ferChristssake

              whats with bellybutton lint

ya go for days an days an aint nothing there yer innie or yer outie did outies have enough pucker to attract lint innies definitely  he could speak of what he had
he could speak with authority

getting ready to shower for workbrushing his teeth first his free hand went to his bellybutton index fingerWHA  hes not alone  the lint is darkwhat did he wear that was dark  past couple of days he wore white tshirts against his body 

he did wear a brown sweater last night  wore layers against the chillmoist air under a green polyester jacket  but how the fuck would fibers gravitate off his sweater under his tshirt wend their snaky way down the hair on his chest and belly to the motherlode  an nestle  

he wished they were affixed with GPS so they could be imagedtracked then spedup the recording it would have to be fascinating

            he checked just nowBAM

wearing a bluegray polyester jacket over a white tshirt  bluegray lint  that was only since 8:13 this morning its 12:32  fourhour migration  a sizable babble  it had to be something with the hair on his chest an bellyhe wasnt hirsute he didnt have hair growing up his throatsteely at his collar or hair growing on his back an shoulders or where a barber had to decide where a haircut ended

he wasnt hirsute

the reason why he was going on an on about it this morningafternoon was remembering getting ready for work last night brushing his teeth fingering his navelBAM lint  he shoved the toothbrushheld it in his teethstepped sideways to drop the lint into the small bathtrash at the corner of the wall an basin cabinet  it dropped heavy no terminal velocity a few inches over the trash it stopped in midairWHOA  he didnt need shit like this in his lifeantigravity lint   his mind was jerry-rigged for flights of fantasy  inanimate objects had voices and character  the lint was YeahBaby Mike Myers alterego Austin Powers YeahBaby Dig me  Im floating in Outer Space in your bathroom   how did that sliver of alternate realitythat physics dimension Time and Space descend or penetrate the houseits walls at this fucking moment

ofcourse theres a reasonable explanation

a spider threw up an unseen webunseen from his angle but he was diggin the gravitydefying lintdiggin its fantastic machinations he dug it so much he was late to work an he was he couldnt say that now but he was never late to work

Yeah he was kid enough but he wished he had a kid around just so he could show emblow their mind an neverNEVER tell em the truth

bellybutton lint is an extraterrestrial

he was so impressed last night that he left the lint hanging in midair he had no idea when it would fallhe didnt mind it tarrying

from last night,  Sunday,  4  3. 18

1259,  Monday,  5  3. 18

hubris

         Corporate America Style

                                     within is an echo of Love America Style  an for that he hoped whoever was connected with it would indulge an forgive him his vulgar intransigeant  mirroring the two

he could only speak of American hubris which galled him  although he was very sure that no matter what language Corporate spoke their hubris an manner would be alike  fucking an American woman wasnt unlike fucking a Greek Irish Italian or Scandinavian woman

Corporations were stringently alike  they attracted the same cut of person no matter what language they spoke

for most of his adult life he eluded playing in their sandbox  his memory informing him wrinkling its nose screwingup its face  reminding him how feral cats loved to piss an shit in neighbourhood sandboxes 

then with the best clothespin he could find pinching his nose shut he took a job with a small one  big or small  didnt matter  same kind of big brains feeding off of one another

originally he likened corporateits upper echelon to a circle jerk

                                                                however when his youngest called an laughingly told him she saw a flick the night before The Human Centipede ohsoripe for retread he immediately dropped circle jerk an adopted centipede gooblegooblegooble didnt have to worry about chewing its food or choking on it

even then  twenty years ago  corporate didnt think or believe they had to watch their Ps and Qs

his small corporation got bought out

management was surprised didnt see it coming

                                                 myopic centipede

 

now Corporates really developed a culture its gatekeepers online ask questions relating to it rather than ones abilities 

centipedes

years later he finally snuck in through a back door an was offered a parttime gig 

he acceptedhe felt they could survive one another parttime

he went into work last Thursday an read a post that there was to be an all-employee sales meeting Sunday morning Seven AM March 11

he didnt have access to a manager then or since 

he wasnt aware if the decision was local management or down from centipede

if it was local he thought the infection had run deeper than he knew

it was obvious Two AM March 11 was Daylight Savings Time  Spring forward  Two AM becomes Three AM  an a Seven o’clock meeting for all intents and purposes though centipede might prefer for all intensive purposes is a Six o’clock meeting

then the cherry atop the sundae was that he had to take 2:46 minutes to watch a sales video where GM Kyle enunciated corporates new scheme of Have Three  suggesting to a customer one you really love  but having two backups two options  

GM Kyle grinned over the one he loved of Have Three  he grinned for awhile  though never offered a second or third choice 

it was a video!

either GM Kyle and the videomaker thought it was so goodgetting it done in one take an they made no mistakes which makes sense  or  cleverly   GM Kyle leering over his first choice  was insisting his first choice was also his second and third choices

ah Corporate centipede   if you listen real hard you can almost hear its nails skitter on the walls an pause as it rubberybends itself over to hide its head up its butt completing the circle               

its what one hubris looks like

0044 and 1144,  Monday,  5  3. 18

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w3DpTs-iV7U

she watched him as he slept

                             he didnt allow anything to interrupt his sleepnot family deathsnot arguments between themhe shutdown their argument told her I dont argue late at nightnot gonna to do it  you can scream at me tomorrow but Im not fuckin with my restoration  Cocksucker  Restoration he told her his dreaming was some kind of marvelous uninhibited uncensored television stationits broadcast impatiently waiting on his sleep  he dreamt in colour blackanwhite cartoon characters text he read while he dreamed  he dreamt about the fantastic the mundane murder slaughter sexviolent sex  when he woke he disgorged them in her lap Thats horrible shed say touching him to console him Such a terrible nightmare hed place his hand over hers Nah baby Its just a dream  he seemed fearless to her  maybe thats why he accepted them simply as dreams

she watched him as he slept

                             they hadnt slept together in a long time

he took ill suddenlyand as suddenly he told her it was best for him if he managed it alone

without her

I gotta be selfish All youd be able to do is witness it an Im not up to that

that hurthe hurt her he was brutally honest

                   but then her mother took a bad turn and needed her

she moved in with her mother to help her mother always needed help

threefour months later she took a new job a halfhours commute south of her mothers who lived a halfhour south of their rental

it took him nearly nine months to get ahead of his unidentified illness Christ I could have had a baby for my trouble  always his curious odd take on things

they hadnt slept together in a long time

                                        she woke in bed first she never cared for that

found him on his backhis hands crossed peacefully on his chest a gruesome funereal pose 

she didnt like seeing him laying there like that like a corpse cradled in a coffin

Aw baby stop Youll never see that I aint dying in bed  An Ill be cremated

cold comfort  still  she didnt care for waking an finding him laying there like that 

no matter how many times he told her his words were never solace

sternly hed rebuke her Listen to me Im a man of my word

You are he was

Then you need to take me at my word an quit the bullshit

You dont have control over that

Quit The Bullshit   

she woke in bed first

                     she saw that he didnt sleep with his head on a pillow as before

he put pillows to either side of his head like blocks  he told her since whatever the shit was that incapacitated him he found he felt better laying flatout

he also didnt snore nowwhich in the past had disturbed her light sleep  had irritated her

somehow  he was different

Im different Curious

Curious How

That your assumption is that Im different

You are

So its not possiblenot at all that youre different  Did you consider that   Or is it always someone elses fault

1209,  Sunday,  4  3. 18

he didnt care for her officeits décor  its lightness  she was proud telling him she had a budget to make it up for herself  problem with that boast was that she was entirely on displaydown to her fucking knickknacks  we all do  where we livewhat we readour knickknacksour highbrowour tacky  women dislikesome recoil from tacky  apparently it was made for children and men

any superficial interests that may have reared in his heads waned  then dissipated

he didnt think he had a particularly high bar or threshold

he said as much

his daughters said otherwise  Seemingly a single facet can throw you off the scent Dad

For example

Alright  Vegetarian  You wouldnt see a woman if she was a vegetarian

A veggieNo I wouldnt

There you go  Your example  Checkmarked  Xed out  their hands acting it out   Buhbye  

No I have to disagree  Thats overall health   If someone cant open their mouthslook in a mirror an see their teeththeir canines incisors the mouth of an omnivore   well  if someone can delude themselves that they arent what they are then theres no telling what else they might think or do 

Besides  a woman who doesnt eat meat  why would they put a cock in their mouth

Oh for cryinoutloud Dad

Dont oh for cryinoutloud me Youre adults  Tell me youve put away childish things  Daddy  Yes Im your father an your mother an I raised you to be a competent intelligent reasoned adult therefore I treat you as adults  I dont pull punchesparticularly pull punches with people who I deem are my equals an better  An youre both better than either meno big hurtle or your mother a big hurtle  But thats the synthesis we wanted  practical  devoid of as much prejudice as we could muster because we came out of a lot it ourselves  We werent going to propagate it

You gonna come up for air

Ah  you know mesometimes I get on a tear an cant shaddup  Youve heard it all before

they nodded  Yes  Thats exactly what our Daddy told us

Stop

     theyd laugh joyfully

yeah  he tried to look past her polish dress an makeup hoping she might be natural under itplaying to some enforced dressup

           he was wrong

she sipped the KoolAid

he saw her mouth was movinghe missed what she said he was too busy listening to his girlstheir accusation  Im sorry  I was distracted  What was it you said

she repeated herself

I think youve broken the rules

Rules

Yes That when you first meet leave politics religion an sex for some other time

I thought this was some other time

This  Midday  Sunlight  This

We know each other . .

. . Superficially  Met through casual acquaintances

Friends

Perhaps friends of yours  Theyre only casually acquainted with me  Hello  How are you  Nice weather todayhuh

Theyre  usually   ah . .

. . Selective  Canaries in a coal mine 

Thats a little severe

Theyre a little severe  Hence only acquaintances

You dont approve of my politics

No

Why

I dont think hes allowed to try an coopt spirituals

I dont follow

he cleared his throat  then softly began singing  He thinks hes got the whole world  in his hands  He thinks hes got the whole world  in his hands  the itty bitty baby  in his hands  you an me brother  in his hands  you an me sister

in his hands  he thinks hes got the whole wide world in his hands

You began saying  but caught yourself   then obliquely you went on to say he has things in the palm of his hands   but I think you wanted to say  has things by the short hairs or by the balls  yaknow more vigorous more visual  which naturally I think one would be incited to say  invigorated saying

Instead  in your strongholdyour place you censored yourselfwhy would you do that  youre certainly sure of yourself  which is usually an attractive quality in a person  So why

There was something in your eyes as if you glinted an opening  I suppose I wanted to try and defuse it

No  You dont know me enough to know that that fuse is particularly short or Im hairtriggered regarding it

it wasnt an eerie silence 

there wasnt anything to talk about

turning towards the office door to leave he said  You have nice digs then began humming the spiritual

1434,  Saturday,  3  3. 18