the Time-honoured family gathering around the kitchen table for dinner and conversation

                                                                                             he missed dining with familywith others itd been years

So girls wanted to share that yare grandfathers doing well his hernia operation was a big an enormous success He called it enormous Told me he wanted a local anesthesia so he could keep his eye on the surgeon in case they got jealousdidnt want any slipups

the girls eyes buggedthey giggled

Oh for crying out loud, Joe his wife said do you have to talk like that at the dinner table?

Comon babe the girls followthey know their grandfather I aint spilling beans or saying anything out of the ordinary for my Dad

Still. It’s dinner. Can’t we have a civil, pleasant conversation?

Civil Whas civil about family

Joe, please?

Awright somebody else got something

I do! said Anie their eldest she was in Fourth Grade What’s a shaking private?

A shaking private? his wife asked

Yes. A friend told me her mother has a shaking private. She knocked on her mother’s door after school and walked in, her mother was sitting on . .

. . Anie Grace their youngest interrupted you said it was a quivering dick.

his wifes eyes nearly bugged 

                              but she caught herselfshe was even able to stuff a rising chuckle  through a beautiful smile she asked Grace, where did you hear that? she couldnt bring herself to say quivering dick

Anie told me.

Anie said quickly That’s what the girl called it; the whole school knows about it.

he interjected  How civil is thathuh

Puh-lease. his wife sputtered

 

they didnt think they were going to have to have their sex talk with Anie until summer at earliest let alone Grace

the gloves were off 

                    they insisted a glove better be on if the girls had an itch that needed to be scratched and they werent provided for

Itch?

he ran with the ballhed been itchier than his wife and he certainly wasnt one who would deny his daughters pleasures he enjoyed 

            First and foremost yadonwanna get knocked up cuz that wont be your mothers or my problem So first don be stupid we know yare not stupid girls

his wife spoke up And second, don’t be stupid.

Yah he said theres that too 

that set the tone for dinner table conversation for weeks to come

                                                                  Anie would you please pass the bowl of quivering dicks

cant make this shit up 

               

0122,  Thursday,  4  1. 90

1400,  Monday,  3  5. 21