It does not seem to me, Austerlitz added, that we understand the laws governing the return of the past, but I feel more and more as if time did not exist at all, only various spaces interlocking according to rules of a higher form of stereometry(the measure of solid bodies), between which the living and the dead can move back and forth as they like, and the longer I think about it the more it seems to me that we who are alive are unreal in the eyes of the dead, that only occasionally, in certain lights and atmospheric conditions, do we appear in their field of vision (pg 185  W G Sebalds Austerlitz).

that was one helluva sentence sentience

it rocked himstopped him on the streetmade him slip his thumb between the pages and close the book  it thumped him in the chest like a rifle butt momentarily arresting his heart stroking his brain blackening his cognitive powers
he would say he reeled    

“appear in their field of vision”
                         that kinda turned him on his head how the deadghosts appeared in his field of vision  they didnt walk through each othernot that you wouldnt think you couldnt walk through a spirits immaterialityan incorporeal ghost like walking through fog or vapours  or that they couldnt walk through youpass through you as if you were a sieve atoms sidestepping atom whispers delicately flowing through whispers  then reengaged whole  intact  on the other sidenever once thinking of yourself an other side

Austerlitz was referring to his parents

World War II was imminent  they sent him away to England but a 4 year old boy to save his life  his mother a Jewess an actress his father a political adversarya necessary refugee who otherwise would be killed  

it is difficult to fathom the audacitybrazenness of the Nazi Party Third Reich its regime its desired Lebensraum(open space) its attendant curative Untermenschen(racially or socially inferior non-Aryans) policy reminiscent of these freaks we havehave had across the country decrying their nativism and inthesamebreath their European heritage – its one or the other – he urged their European ancestry because nativism should be left to the First People tribes who flourished throughout North and Central and South America some who suffered bounties placed on their heads seeking their extermination   unless of course their nativist cry is meant to insist incite or invite their particular extermination
he was confident thats not what they meant  seemed counterproductive to creating a White Aryan homeland
which America never was

he had to get his hands on some of their hallucinogens

no delusion could be that pervasivethat powerful

his ghosts saw him

otherwise he didnt think they wouldnt back away when he acknowledged their presencewhen he addressed them directly got to his feet and walked towards them

they didnt seem distressed  fearful   perhaps put-out as any of us might be if we felt things werent going the way we wanted

a child could understand that

they reversed field waft away  defusing as they went

he found himself alone in an empty hallway saying Hello   Hello       Hello

he had no names to call them

there was an older man 

he appeared in the hall and neared the threshold of their bedroom

he never entered

there was an old woman

she never materialised to him

his girlfriend however saw her repeatedly  usually in the kitchen

there was a young woman  a bit of a sprite

his girlfriend had never seen her though often felt her mischievous presence

she materialised to him  floating above him as he laid in bed

she knew his namecalled him his name

he was sure she shared his name with the man and woman

often they drew his attention  woke him in the dead of night making noise in the livingroom

they woke his girlfriend  their cat

his girlfriend was nervous someone was breaking and entering

Baby  Weve nothing of value except what we personally value

he went into the hall

indie and his girlfriend stayed in bed held down the fort

he checked the studio kitchen livingroom diningroom  No one  he was careful not to say Not a soul

then returning to the bedroomstill in the hall he barked over his shoulder Yawanna keep it down People are trying to sleepget some rest We got work in the morning

the end until the next time

his experiences didnt support Austerlitzs

but he rationalised that it wasnt necessary they did

those were his

   

1202,  Moanday,  11  9. 17
1601,  Twosday,  12  9. 17