They werent there

it didnt bother him that they werent there  what grieved him was that she wasnthis wife wasnt  for if it was anyones place to be there it was hers

she could have been there would have been there if her family had been honest with hernot suffused magically thinking enforced by hope

               if they werent selfish

but they knew what was best for her

                               they never relinquished their damaged thinking

and try as he may severely pathologically always bringing this memory to the fore  it dropped in his lap left to him to inform her  tell her her ally the greatest love of her life was dead    

WAS DEAD  

she should have been there

she would have been the first to know

                                 instead . . . . he waited five hours on the news caring for their three-month old daughter until she returned home thoroughly unsuspecting  waylaid   ambushed    skewered

as her family knew she would be

her eldest sister who he was devoid of trust or any confidence said as much

This is going to kill her     

kill her

         HER

in the abrupt minutes after their mothers death she couldnt call her sister by name

callous

he was a fool if he thought more of her

fortunately he never did

she was a perverse harpy squatted happily on carrionsmacking her lips  licking her fingertips  her bites of dead flesh seemingly delectable Belgium chocolates

he replied strictly

Who is this going to kill

(her singular fortune at that moment was he couldnt get his hands around her throat)

Well  Cece of course

he knew their mothers death wouldnt kill Krisshe preferred being called Kristy

  

he made a point of never calling her Kristyof never allowing any sweetness Kristy might imply

he didnt implyhe left nothing with this family(his by marriage) implied

he was explicit

hard-edged

he could cut diamonds

he gave his wifes family no brook

which curiously  his wife recognised and berated him  although somehow was unable to see it fester in them towards her

his rejoinder to her anger was unremarkable

                                                  I love you Cece

Im treating them as they treat you

it did kill her

it was a slow death                           

                     3 August 1979     2 January 2002 

the half-life subset to the dates on her headstone

1644,  Thursday,  3  8. 17

Molly Pitcher

The Kilimanjaro Darkjazz Ensemble  I Foresee the Dark Ahead, If I Stay  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pnVaaKT9tg4