21.6.21


 
      touchstone  a touch stone 
                                   when a touchstone is wood  a gravemarker not a gravestone
how it feels different under his fingers than stone its quiet catches at his whorls and loops gently tugging them reminding him of her brushing his hair not because he was lazythat couldnt do it himself but because he wanted her to do it for him  humoured she chastised him You’re a big boy now, you can brush your own hair. 

she wasnt well hadnt been well for what seemed to him a long time

brushing his hair was one of the few things she could do that didnt exhaust her 

it gave them time alone she talked as she brushed his hair he loved the music of her voice they didnt talk about important things they talked about how they felt about things he listened intently to her because he was very sure when she died he would forget her voice and he wanted to fill his head to bursting with her breath her words to pushback against forgetting how she said them her cadence her particular words phrases

he tried hard to memorise them so when he would say them he might see her face and hearing them maybe catching an echo of her voice  desperately knowing he wouldnt have them if she hadnt said

1722,  Twosday,  15  6. 21
1243,  Monday,  21  6. 21
Jordan Rakei - Wind Parade  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c8xZB5bWTbI 
Steam Down feat. Afronaut Zu – Etcetera  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WL6mMhkkyL4

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