the car hurtled on the 280 approaching Palo Alto

he didnt want to be in it 

somehow his keys were misplaced You must have set them down elsewhere.

I never set them anywhere else  Always in the bamboo bowl in the entrance

We’ll have to use mine. We need to get going.

Ill drive

No.

I’ll drive.

They’re my keys.

I dont think its wise you drive

I don’t care what you think. We need to go, now. they were meeting their daughter at Stanford for an appointment that she really wanted them to be there for I said now.

it was for their daughter hed risk anything for his daughter

the appointment went well the doctor commenced it saying it was wise they ran the battery of preliminary tests they did the findings she noted would be a blueprintwere keen to what the odds were of how things may or may not be realised

at its conclusion she said that since there was nothing conspicuoustheir daughter hadnt complained of any symptoms she would see her in another six months however if appearing symptomatic to please contact her office she would be available

their daughter was an Animal Science major at Davis science was her undergirding she would be vigilant it was also theirs they were Biology majors although neither had found their way to a degree 

they wanted to take her to lunch after the appointment but she apologised she had to leave promptly to make an afternoon class

they walked her to her car  they embraced her she was so thankful they made the three hour drive to be there with her she brushed tears out of her eyes You’ll never know how important it was you were here. Thank you so very much.

they stepped aside wiping tears from the corner of their eyes as she backed out of the parking space

I LOVE YOU! she cried through her open window her arm immediately up and waving to them

they cried I LOVE YOU!! and then stood in the aisle waving to hershe waving back until she disappeared around a massive pylon that supported a circular ramp that wound down to the street

She could have had lunch with us his wife said disgruntled

She has class

We came all this way for nothing.

We came all this way because she asked if we would For the appointment  You said we would For the appointment Please dont make more out of it 

Now I have to drive home.

I could drive if you rather so you can rest an . .

. . They aren’t your keys, are they?

No

You misplaced your keys.

I didnt

You should admit when you’re wrong.

When Im wrong I admit it I didnt misplace my keys

So I took them?

Its only you and I at home Maybe a ghost lifted them

You’re a prick.

he wasnt going to have this fight

he shut up

There you go; nothing to say?

. . .

I’m driving. And that’s it.

an advantage of not driving and particularly along the 280 south was to be able to appreciate the wide openness of the highway beyond it to either side the redwoods the verdant stretches he hoped the appointment would be in San Francisco he really enjoyed the long silver shimmer of the Crystal Springs Reservoir however heading south there was a massive ornate temple on the west side of the highway that stoked his architectural imagination and harped at his construction expertise 

exiting onto the 85 East his wife said still an edge in her voice Are you going to ride mute all the way home?

No I wasnt going to have an argument in a public parking structure

You misplaced your keys. Why would I move them?

Why You might so you could drivebe in the drivers seat Be in control

That’s not true.

If youre not in control you become upset I prefer you not drive because of the prescriptions youre taking . .

. . Always my prescriptions. You think my doctor doesn't know what he’s doing . .

. . What hes been doing for three years A regime that by all accounts in books Ive read insist drugs be introduced for a brief time then the patient is taken off them to facilitate the determined psychiatric work

He knows . .

. . He doesnt  He's shaking the insurance company down All he does is change up your drugsMygawd change them outHow many different drugs are you taking every day I dont know any longer Youre secretive

He's trying to save my life.

Your life In construction when a subcontractoryoure the contractor when the subcontractor isnt doing the work you pay him to do you replace him A psychiatrist is no different He hasnt interviewed either me or the kids . .

. . I can speak for you, the three of you . .

. . NO  You cant  How dare you

How dare I?

YOU can only speak for youyou ought to know that Your bright psychiatrist should know that Three years!

they were moving fast through San Jose proper well ahead of the three oclock rush passing under cross street bridges between concrete abutments

I can speak for you and the girls.

You cannot

I can.

Youre being dishonest if you think you know our minds

Dishonest?

Yes I wouldnt dare speak for you or the girlstheyre young adults

Because you don’t know . .

. . You dont either If you think you do youre fooling yourselfyoure being a fabulist                    

A liar?

You have no idea whats turning in my head

You want to know what’s turning in mind?

Not necessailynot right now  Id rather you pay attention to the road

I’m thinking . . do you want to die?  

You wanna die right now?

she wasnt bluffing

she wanted to die

he didnt dare challenge her hand

he bit his lip

his lip bled

I can make that happen. I could take us into any of these walls. 

I might even survive.

You wouldn’t. Everyone knows you don’t wear a seatbelt.

So.

Do you want to die?

I dont

Do you want to kill me

he rolled his window down and set his arm on its edge he could hear the air rushhear the tires spinning feel the air whip past the car tug at his arm

                                   he relaxed

when something is out of your control theres not a damn thing you can do about it

the ball was in her court

2348,  Sunday,  2 12. 18

1407,  Monday,  17  12. 18