12.11.24

thoughtfulnessmindfulness put spurs to him  always have
                                                                 thats how he arrived fresh from the womb
though he couldnt begin to say how cautiously he moved in life
                                                                   deliberately small taste by small taste
his younger brother and sister rode twowheelers before he did
learned to swim before he did

    he had reason
                     was badgeredharassed for being lefthanded made him hesitant   made him stutter 
righties have no clue
theyre status quo
he didnt have scissors not school desks not baseball gloves  not shit
                                                                           he had to learn to be ambidextrous
had 66 cousins

was the only lefthander

not one of his fourteen aunts and uncles  not one of this huge extended family
                                                                                       easily was one of a hunred
 

his grandmother tied his hand closed when his Mom left him with her

she returned earlier than expected one day and hailed Hell on her mother

teachers
           were disgusted  unforgiving
did their damnedest to flip him
                                   forgetting
they couldnt flip a brain


but when he finally caughtup  became unbound
                                                      his stuttering ceased he became confident
and encouraged he learned how to ride learned how to swim 

in a new school they moved  WENT   CRAZY
                                                   yet
his thoughtfulness mindfulness remained intact



he learned there were a thousand or more phoneapps computer sites promoting it
                                                                                       his daughter told him
she admitted she had several
needed them to remind her

    his heart ached

wondered if he hadnt let her down

how something so ingrained in him didnt present to her
                                                           he taught by actions  not words
    he apologised

Don’t. I saw. I did.  Was so effortless for you.
                                                 Always work for me. You’re lucky, Dad.
Run with it.

1627,  Monday – Armistice Day,  11  11. 24
1229,  2sday,  12  11. 24

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