theyd been drinking plentywere inebriated words were coming out funny which always entertained him and he laughed harder than anyone at others slurs and mispronunciations helter skelter juxtapositions and dropped thoughts What was I saying?

This is time for telling stories boys Man up

the other six at the circular knifecarvedup wood table went quiet

he wasnt terribly drunk he was happyappeased which to him meant slightly pissed  as his New Zealand and Australian friends said

he didnt care for the term hisself

                                  however when it slipped out of their mouths anthey knew he didnt care for it it didnt seem so offensive not as offensive as when he heard it in the States

 

since no stories were apparently forthcoming he offered the first hoping to loosen some tongues around the table

concluding it he sat back grabbed the barmaid gently by the wrist as she was passing she didnt mind and ordered himself another whisky and beer

Can’t drink house whisky, man? You always gotta have something separate?

the guy was a prickwasnt a friend an acquaintance

Yadrink whaya like Ill drink wha I like friend friend sounded asif he spat Whos got the next story

prick said nothing

the other five sucked their beers

Awright a second One morelast one outa my mout

concluding the second it was a peach they all laughedwhich was his intent  Awright Whos steppin up an in Whos got the next tale

prick opened his mouth

                         You know, man, your stories make you sound like a peeker; a pervert.

Lemme fill in the blanks yacant fill without insult despite yer intent I prefer voyeur I place keen details in my stories as I try to recreateas best I can so what Im saying others might see see better 

                                                                                I wouldnt be here if I wasnt a keen observer My life depended on it

Frankly prick if I were you Id be dead 

You got a mouth on you! he angrily tried to push away in his chair from the table but his heels slipped on the peanut shells on the sawdusted floor 

                              Motherfuck passed out of his mouth but looking up he saw that he stood over him

Yawere saying

                Where Ive been youd be a dead man

he was smart to not say anything probably the smartest hed ever been in his life

he rapped him on the forehead with his index finger 

                                                       I got one more story Innarested  prick

meekishly Okay.

Awright In defense of my ass as yasay being a perv a peeker Again I prefer voyeur or just fuckin observant I served a tour in Nam as a tunnel rat

When I went down for induction Select Service the draft When the group I was in was supposed to step forward acknowledge that they were submitting I didnt

I enraged the military and pseudo-militarythe community members who sat on the Draft Board

I signed my name declaring my refusal to enter the Army with a period at its end

I was in the first groupthe morning group

They kept me assuring me they had the right to hold me over for the next group later that morning  

They encouraged me to reconsider

                                     If not whadaya gonna do kill my family

When the second group assembled standing in three lines thirty guys I was at the front

Time came to step forward They did  I did not

Again I signed my name but with a bigger period at its end

Military and the civilian comandante really got their panties in a knot

Enthusiastically they explained to me that never since the Draft begansince it was commenced had they not sent every available A-1 draftee in the community into service

Cocksure I said Sorry boys hate to bust yer perfect bubble but I aint going to fight someone I have no grudge against or existential reason to fight Terrible thing bombin a country back into the Stone Age

I felt a pinch on my arm

When I came to I was on a rear seat of a sedan My hands were shackled together feet shackled a bind strung between them Hogtied Well I aint never sees a hog get out of one so I didnt resist I closed my eyes and went back to dreamland I can always muster a good dream

I woke up in a cell

Crazy to see sunlight passing through bars

Later that morning I was visit by three military officers who presented me with paperwork irrefutable paperwork they said that bore my signature agreeing to my induction 

Damn if my signature didnt have a period at its end 

Only times I ever placed it to exemplify and exacerbate my abject derision to the draft     

he nodded his head  It was a forgery

Three weeks into boot camp I injured enough draftees that at night in my rack I suffered another pinch on the arm When I came to I was drooling down the front of my khakis I was on a military aircraft flying to Nam

I was small then

I was designated tunnel rat

Before the end of my first tour Id grown into my mature body put on four inches and sixty pounds couldnt be a rat nomo

And Id kill someone before Id reup

 

The point of my story is I am fucking observant 

                                                  Naif yawanna take our differences outside an discuss them Im happy to oblige

Otherwise Prick  Shut yer piehole      

2304,  Monday,  18  1. 21

1254am,  Twosday,  19  1. 21