the churchs symmetry was offputting as a child it frightened him  his parents as he walked between them hand-in-hand were confused when they recognised as they passed the church that he closed his eyes 

it wasnt his church their church but then there wasnt a church that was his

as soon as he could refuse his parents entreaty he quit attending

it was not an attractive time in his memory of family     

The First Reformed Church  

                             a meter-tall manicured hedge ran around its property a scrubbedclean white concrete public sidewalk ran before it   

a dark-red brick coagulated blood walk lead all the way up from the street  crossed the hellstrip the Church preferred parkway he didnt  then it ran between the hedges entering the manicured green property  unerringly straight it ran up to a two-step flagstone rise to the portico and the doubledoored entry artfully centered between columns 

in his teens on two consecutive Halloweens he had himself lashed between them  first as Sampson the next year as Odysseus listening to the Sirens sweetly singing 

he was not appreciated

then maybe the founders shouldnt have had erected such cool fucking pillars

he didnt appreciate the strict white clapboard structure tall and narrow a spire topped offcrowned by a tall belltower  pointing to heaven

                     or as he told the priest a bird flipping off nonbelievers

it had an elegant symmetry  mirror-imagined two halves unfolded

                                                                       Informing unity. Balance. 

No padre strictness The churchs structure forces enforces hierarchy authority  dogma 

All which are a waste of time  to me 

Ordnance Weaponry   Love Gawd or else

I like wild things

I like natural things

Church is unnatural

I’m sorry you feel that way, my son. I will pray fo . .

. . Dontdont  dont waste your time Save your prayers for those who buy into what youre selling

he disliked symmetry since he was a boy

toss him chaos

he had good hands

1746,  Sunday,  21  7. 17

1333,  Thursday,  25  7. 19

Buddy Guy/Jimi Hendrix  Jam Session  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pq3rWLySRf8