a man with a red sunburnt face crossed in front of himhis car jaywalked as he drove   

the man gave his a cursory glance then assumed his California right as a pedestrian  cars yield to human bodies  pedestrians are inviolate 

that defiant right always tickled the hell out of him he was from Chicago there yawanna cross midstream in front of a car ya take yer life in yer own hands I swear I didnt see him officer Why wouldnt someone cross at the crosswalk not a hunred yards back likely the officer might hem an haw showing inestimable consideration  then would agree with him particularly if the crushed dead wrapper of a person was demonstrably homeless might be seen or construed as a civic improvement

it wouldnt have been so bad irked him less if Suntan hadnt glowered at him as he stepped off the curb  as if he was inconveniencing him affecting his meandering sauntering his apparent aimlessness  now Suntan had to pass out of the lanehad to assume a kind of purpose to his life  attaching itself like a parasite

he tempered his anxiousnesshis honed Chicagoan brute overtly reminding himself he wasnt in a hurrythere werent cars behind him  he could take in relish smell the rosesbut-not-deeply observe this performance this dramatis persona  he couldnt imagine that one casually became homeless there were the inner unseen ticks and workings the unconsciousness--consciousness the outward ticked-offness  they  and those who help or may have tried to help and those who may have tried to help then threw in the towel Goddammit! Goddammit! You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make the fucking thing drink.

Suntan weaved subtly  maybe this horse preferred something other than water

negotiating the curb he finally got his foot on top of it and left the street apparently a laborious effort as he continued down the sidewalk he took tentative thendeliberate heavy steps  seemingly steadying himself  as if he didnt and stumbled hed fall off the face of the planet   the mans gravity different from his

he took his foot off the brakerolled back a bit as the car was on an incline and nudged the accelerator the speed limit just ahead was twentyfive no sense accelerating just to brake

having passed Suntan he watched him in his sideview then his rearview mirror

he had long jetblack greasy hair rays of sunlight through the trees struck it and flashedreflected 

he wouldnt say Suntan wore his hair long

he would say he wore a long limecoloured tshirt he wore long black pants that caught at the tops of his running shoes despite it was unlikely hed ever run anywhere however  watching him  what struck him was about the longness of the tshirt the pants the way they hung off him the way his arms hung straight at his sides his head tipped forward  what struck him was the longness of the clothing was more than just being too big for him as if the longness was physical was weight was another kind of gravity that dispossessed the man made him beyond homeless   made him alien

it was an odd sense

when he stopped up the road moments later at a stop sign he checked Suntan one last time through the rearview mirror

where did he gohe was walking beside a whitepainted concrete block retaining wall stemming a hillside

where did he go

                                                     maybe he stumbled  fell into the sky

1837,  Sunday,  3  6. 18

1152,  Monday,  4  6. 18