terrifying beauty

The glass he drank from was too big for his hand his face
                                                              but he didnt see it that way

hell he didnt even see himself staring at him from the mirror behind the bar

maybe the goldvein curling and marbling in its silver obscured him saved him from his obvious ridiculousness

he needed a helping hand

maybe a third hand

so it wouldnt slip shake free or get bumped out of his grasp from his highchair

I certainly wasnt going to say

Id hung around with him too long

I knew you wouldnt see what youd get

he carried an equalizer

he was partial to straight razors

it seemed he liked the colour and the flare of hot blood

youd be a fool to think otherwise of him and youd be surprised how many fools were carrying stitches he divvied them

divvied

shivvied

sliced

he was quick like a greased runt pig

I liked to keep him in front of me

I liked seeing exactly where he stood

because Id hate like hell to lose our friendship over something stupid

he was wound mighty tight and it didnt take much to churn in his nut

then  he was like talking a jumper off a ledge

   

ya never get near enough to em to let em take you with em

the only time I saw him get emotional about anything was when I shared a photograph from the Mütter Museum of Mary Ashberry rather her skeleton  taken in 1856

standing beside a common dining chair  barely taller than it  holding the skull of her stillborn child in her open hand

they did not survive the attempted childbirth

Mary suffered from Achondroplasia a common dwarfism

wiping a brief tear from his eye he said While the bodies may be ugly there is a terrifying beauty in the spirits of those forced to endure these afflictions

Gretchen Worden its curator  she said that

You might understand now why I bait and inflict the damage I do

I cant remember what I said

not a week later someone picked him up bodily and threw him against the mirror   

smashing it and used a broken shard to gut him

a man who earlier lost an ear to him

I do remember the “terrifying beauty in the spirit”

2148,  Saturday,  22  11. 14