CAUTION

               was printed in white over a censors black barGawddamn he loved the jetblack bars affixed over naked womens eyescurled like snakes standing haughty in stiletto heels fingers at their hips  totally hiding their identity from him 

a friend could walk up to him wrapped in a pair sunglasses and hed have no idea who the fuck they were

thats how pervasive his adoration was

GAS PIPELINE followed CAUTION  writ immediately under it on the signs white field 

then INANEMERGENCYCALL followed of course the words ran together emergencies incite panicgo ahead try an take a breath GAS!  INANEMERGENCYCALL (800) 548-6841

SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA GAS COMPANY

then followed the formal stamp of legitimacy

DESTRUCTION OF THIS SIGN VIOLATES FEDERAL LAW   ooh shiver me timbers

all of thats well and good

                           however not one hundred feet south of the sign the coolblue powderedblue cube on El Camino went KABOOM

it upheavedleapt in masswent up its insides roiling out guts on its face in a BELCH  in an angelic brilliant white flash and fell back down cremated by a gasblue flame 

its smoke never was black  

it billowed white up through the trees into the sky a geyser erupted
                                                                         an appealing immolation

he didnt mind picking himself up from dirt and gravel and brittle bitter weeds at the shoulder of the El Camino where he was thrown down on his back by the concussion

nobody saw it or had seen it as marvelously as he did

he wiped blood off his face away from his eyes with the backs of his hands 

it was nothing much

it tickled him

1258,  Twosday,  24  7. 18

1022,  Sunday,  29  7. 18

*   *   *

posted 25 July 2018

the coolblue powderedblue cube on El Camino was losing its icy demeanor  to sized and sawn pieces of reused plywoodvertical patchwork screwed into its stubborn sides

an icecube wounded and scabbing

the blue cube was melting despite built of wood and slathered with stucco that was applied as-smooth-as-a-babys-butt

above the front door now secreted behind plywood were wounds where an awning hung a high rectangle of brighter blue paint  a dismissive shadow

the face of the housethe front door was a foot back from the edge of a public sidewalk and a singlestep stoop just large enough for two kitchen chairs laid on top the sidewalk 

he recalled the small fight between the city and the old woman who lived there the local newspaper carried the story  the city violated her property line and she wasnt going to have it  and when the wind of jurisprudence blew away the feeble smoke clearing her the stoop remained 

                                                if the front door wasnt hidden behind a decrepit sheet of plywood and a posted UNSAFE City Ordinance notice one could read the clipped yellowed article of her victory inside a brittle plastic sheath thumbtacked to it

other metal awnings hung over other windows at the sides of the house and over another doorway that let out onto another stoop to an illkept scant gravel and stone driveway

he never went behind the house  the property was curtailed by a ramshackle stacked threefoot stone retaining wall

an easement paralleling the drive on the opposite side of the house led to its rear 

he neglected remarkably his curiosity out of respect for the privacy of who lived behind the old woman

the awnings at the sides of the house were collapsing which he thought oddthey were stout

                                                                                                 but it seemed since the house was clapped with rancid plywood the old lady removed?dead? that either the weight of the vacant birdnests or the small birds perching on them singing their gay songs had finally defeated them  or that they were sorrowful eyelids that no longer had any reason to remain open and gaze  the support scrolls on either side of the awningslike musical clef notes were squeezed into whole notes or mournful mouths

Ah dismayed he wondered if the old woman had lived alone

                                                                 the coolblue powderedblue cube for her made as much sense to him as a shoe made sense for the old woman who lived in a shoe – she had so many children she didnt know what to do – and they abandoned her as soon as they could

                                                    and her children never looked back

for they were certain their memories for the most part were fabulous fiction and really  really who would have fealty to fiction

woefully he missed the cubes vitality

1310,  Monday,  27  7. 18

1024,  Twosday,  24  7. 18

$26.66

I’m not buying that.

Okayyou can take something off . .

. . I’ll buy something more.

Because of three sixes

Are you an idiotYes.

he bit his tonguehe curbed the avalanche of Ya superstitiousya stupid led by your noseya led by yer pussy(occasionally their cock) Ya buy into that crap buy into the dictates of advertising

                                                                   Huh

felt like his head was going to blowup

but when he wasnt around work he came on gangbusters  perhaps a bit too strongperhaps guided by latent insults he was required to endure

                         sometimes he caught his tongue stepped back looked them in the face and say Give me a moment woudja  I just wanna knock off the clock so Im not workingnot an employee just an everyday common Joe

Then youre welcome to repeat what you just said

Yagoodwiddat

nothing inebriated him quicker than stupidity
not even a water glass filled with gin
up side
        he didnt suffer a hangover afterwards maybe a split lip  but he gave as good as he got

though usually his irritation not to suffer yahoos kept pushing him until it shoved him out the door before punches were thrown

he tried hard to exit

                     anybody who was that stupid stood a good chance their whole head was made of bone and hed hurt his hands  

he apologised elliptically I didnt mean to hurt your feelings  I didnt realise you had any

once upon a time he placed such lugs on a plane with planarianflatworms then he read that even theysimple animals had nociceptive receptor systems to steer them away from damaging situations
if they didnt veer he certainly wasnt backing down

nursing a black eye someone asked  Howd that happen?

hed say

theyd say  Boy, that’s stupid!

his point exactly

1538, Thursday,  26  7. 18

1632,  Friday,  27  7. 18

https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2017/10/171017163703.htm

redux 26 October 2016

growing up in Chicago how couldnt a disaffected teenage paperboy not find hero-worship for SDSs Tom Hayden Freedom Rider Port Huron statementer  howl and cheer his part in the Chicago 8 standing against the Machines Boss Mayor Daley sitting(bound gagged and chained) shameful Judge Julius(Caesar) Hoffman and defended by the reeling razorsharp attorney William Kunstler(he wanted a Cunstler)

                                               how couldnt a disaffected teenager recognise Bobby Seales courtroom plight recognise then the validity of the Black Panther Party for Self Defence created after Malcolm Xs assassination and then understand all the more keenly appreciate that these black Oakland California men celebrated Womanism and associated with Whoa! Whos that? Angela Y. Davis her afro jacked him her intellect jacked him and years and years later she remained the only black woman he ever formed a crush on (what pinned his crush was his unmitigated relish that she was apprehended by (suspect J Edgars) FBI in a New York City Howard Johnsons Motor Lodge -- Friday Nights All-You-Can-Eat fried clams baby -- manna)  

in 2015 at a conference on Vietnam Haydens keynote remarks cited that there must be a persistent struggle for memory and for history they were living things on-going and did not end

his words caused him pause 

curiously the day before Hayden died he wriote a piece where he declared that he didnt spell America A-M-E-R-I-C-A but A-M-N-E-S-I-A

so despite his agonising his bitching his teen-angst of having to live in Chicago itching to begone

he did keep his eyes open

he was vigilant

            OH the things he saw the things he remembered keenly 

things that some people to-day are trying to rewrite

it made him wonder who the anonymous person was hed hand off to

1834,  Monday,  24  10. 16

2254,  Twosday,  25  10. 16

http://www.democracynow.org/2016/10/25/tom_hayden_1939_2016_on_vietnam

CSNY  Chicago  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fEFsBF1X1ow

Womanist  http://noteasybeingred.tumblr.com/post/206038114/alice-walkers-definition-of-a-womanist-from-in

anytime someone approached his register carrying a bottle of Irish whiskey he queried them why they drank Irish to Canadian or Kentucky Tennessee whiskey  or perhaps scotch

he knew why he did
                      members of the The Peaky Blinders gang put a gun to his head for five seasons  and they were always good to their word 

an elderly gentleman who had stood behind a breathtaking young redhead(redheads were rarely breathtaking in his experience) stepped in her tangible space which remained after she left

My it feels like shes still her.

You can say that again man Godness

Godness?

My shorthand for true honest-to-God goodness

My. I believe I like that.

Youre welcome to it but I daresay you wont use it often I cant remember the last time I said so

She was godness.

She was And I also cant remember the last timeif ever I said that of a redhead I am not partial to redheads Or partial to blondes Imagine California blondes dont turn my head

Then boy, you’re like me, you like dusky women.

Dusky Yes I like that  I like dusky women

the old man nodded appreciating their mutual appreciation

And apparently we also seem to appreciate Irish spirits

My. Who are you? Me, when I was a young man?

No Then we couldnt be here together now  Or could we

the old man grabbed ahold of the counters lip before he let loose an awesome belly laugh 

after several moments he was able to sayMy! My my! That was a fine retort.

Thank you It is few an far between that can recognise a retort

Goodness, rather godness lad, how is it you’re working here?

I enjoy myself They pay me to enjoy myself Im rippin them off dont you think

I do. This is the most fun I’ve had buying liquor ever.

Then thats saying something

That’s truly saying something, yes. 

Youre not from here or live here

My. You are perceptive. Is it that I’m lacking my California tan?

he laughed Yes The tan More so the mannerthe way you carry yourself sir

Still? Mum would be proud. She was a bear about carriage and manners. Us children each had our own switches. She’d have us fetch them and stand waiting our turn. She told us, not a one of us, were ever going to reflect poorly on her. Not a one.

I appreciated her sternness later.  

And now.

A big family

There were ten children.

Im the eldest of eight

Then you know. I thought I recognised your mother in you.

Thank you Ill be sure to let her know You realise of course her head will swell

Have her remove her bonnet before you tell her so.

She lives back East with the whole mob They never got the Go West, young man, go West. John Babsone fantastic middle namehuh Babsone Lane Souleactually the whole of his name is quite melodious Then it was rephrasedmade famous by Horace Greeley but the country was already grown up when I was born

You know your history.

No I know trivia particularly trivia that incites me I also read a lot so I have a lot of useless information at my fingertipsplaying at the tip of my tongue I could probably happily commune with a chimp if I had to Tell himNO Drop the feces Therell be no flinging feces today

the old man burst into another bout of his belly laughter 

which proved infectious

he joined in and laughed till he had tears in his eyes

My, my. That was elating. I cannot say the last time I roared like that. I believe you cleared my sinuses, belched old smoke up out of my lungs.

My, my.

recovered he said I suppose we can tip our caps to our vivacious redhead and the space she left us eh

Yes. She certainly rarified our atmosphere. Truly rarified.

As I was saying my mother lives back East Ill call and have her take a seat so I dont floor her Imagining her in a bonnet is a cherry atop a sundae Thank you

You’re welcome.

they vied awhile longer but a line began to assemble

I should regret leaving our conversation, though I do appreciate you’re working.

My regret as well

One last thing. Don’t play Doonbeg if you golf if you visit Ireland. Illegal Russian money aided your president. And he was elated to have it.

Be a good boy, as your mother raised you.

they never got around to the old mans take on Irish whiskey

1046,  Saturday,  28  7. 18

https://www.irishtimes.com/news/ireland/irish-news/trump-inquiry-hears-claim-of-russian-mafia-money-link-to-doonbeg-1.3361639

hed been to Colorado Seattlewas in California where blowin a joint in public was no big deal  its legal

marijuanas legal  its overly-long-delayed legitimacy however grates him

he was for ithad been for it 

it was better than booze

if he had the choice hed opt for it

he just preferred it when it was illegal  loosely enforced

in Chicago the cops just confiscated it

sometimes they dumped it out on the dirt or gravel in front of you  and grounded it beneath the soles of their shoes then told you to beat it

sometimes they pocketed it  and it irked you to know they were going to get high on your dope

if they caught you with a big score  and arrested you  when you were arraigned you found that you were being charged with possessing half or less of what you had when you were arrested

whos gonna bitchinform the Court NO I had five kilosnot two

cops sold off the excess beyond what they wanted for themselves or their friends and family

hell when push came to shove he reached out to a couple of cops that were buddies of his cousin

it helped to be connected to be liked by particular cops

he had to side with the Blue they ran risks civvies didnt they had skin in the game

Mary the dentists daughterthen dentists gave you suckers or other sweets after they drilled your teeth  no Novocain  that cost a pretty penny  more than his old man was willing to shell out although to be fair he had seven siblings  pretty pennies added up and into that mix they all preferred to eat  what was a little pain to having food no brainer   

Mary he could never remember her last name

after smoking hashMary could afford hashshe was a dentists daughter they tried to roll a No. 2 Ticonderoga pencil with their minds

they gobbled psilocybintried to roll pencils they split pods of jimsonweed from trips she made to California and tried to roll pencils Man, the plants grow alongside the road. Free shit. Amazing. I love California. I’m gonna live there someday.

she didntshe died of an overdose just before he moved to Montana to become a dental floss tycoon she just couldnt dial back her enthusiasm or rather the way he saw it  she could afford her enthusiasm

Mary got fingered by several Jamaican prison guardspart of her patdown when she went to visit a friend of theirs Tommy  who pulled an armed robbery at a night clubhe fired a shot into the air to get everyones serious attention and the bullet ricocheted off something and killed someone really fucked upreally bad luck

she crawled into a low concrete bunker with a dirt floor at the back Tommy slept in one corner and in the corner diagonal from it near the rebarred steel door he relieved himself

Tommy told her as a matter of fact he wasnt getting out aliveno matter how his trial ended  his basic necessitiesif he wanted access to them he had to blow guards for them  Ain’t happenin. I’ll swearI’ll promise to get outget into the yard, but some poor dumb bastard is gonna have his cock bit clean off.

they wrote letters to Tommy when she returned

their letters were returned UNKNOWN

then they heard he was killed trying to escape

Mary scored some opium from someone in the city probably not a copshe ran with horse people who uniquelyto his mind went effortlessly around the world

they fired it up in a dark corner of the Snuggery a bar in Edison Park

the barmaid quickly made it over to their table You can’t do that in here. she told them theyd have to leave if they didnt stop or shed call the police

they ordered a pitcher of Half-and-Half gave her cash for two and told her when she returned theyd give her a couple of tokes

the gal ticked up the fan that turned over their headslaid a smouldering Camel in a tin ashtray at the center of the table served them and got high

he was really into Mary

shed give him head but she wouldnt fuck him

Why

Because you’re seeing my best friend Maureen.

We broke up months ago

No matter. She’s still my best friend and she’s not over you. You broke up with her.

I broke up with her because she wouldnt stop doing angel dust I cant care for someone who doesnt care for themselves Thats a losing proposition

She’s my best friend.

Then get in her head and make her stop

No. She’s welcome to do what she wants to do.

She is  But maybe you dont procure it for herhuh

None of your business, is it?

None of my business  

maybe that was friendship

he fucked his best friends girlfriend and two others girls at an all-girl party in a basement bedroom

somehow he was called in because they were bored when they was picked him up from his place he was pulled into a car with seven women who were dressed in pj’s yanking him in to sit in the back between them their breasts played under their tops like happy puppies    

she ratted on him because she felt bad afterwards

You didn’t think she’d tell me? his best friend asked

I cant see why she would She was the last to have mesloppy thirds

Are you trying to piss me off?

Piss you offYou ought to be pissed off  But not at me   I didnt go looking for her

You don’t think you owe me an apology?

Awright  Im sorry you found out

things are better when theyre illict

she told him she couldnt hold her tongue

she told him there wouldnt be a next time

he told her that must be a tremendous relief to his best friend

there was a next time

she showed up at his place

since she couldnt hold her tongue she said he said hed hold her tongue under his dick  and when she was thoroughly breathless he took her from behind she had a fantastic appleshaped ass  in the behind  because she also said shed never done that before

turned out she never breathed a word of their adventure to his best friend  or rather he never said anything to him if she did

a couple of years later while he was living in Montana his best friend wrote him that he proposed to her

she denied him

She told me no. She said I wasn’t adventurous enough.

he wrote him back Maybe you should have fucked her in the ass.

he wrote him back No. I wouldn’t do that. That’s disgusting.

he wrote him Sounds like she was right.

things are better when theyre illict

1636,  Thursday,  26  7. 18
1410,  Friday,  27  7. 18

there was a timetheres always a time but she found it difficult to get away from cherrypicking times of those times 

she was writing her autobiography 

she wasnt twentyfive 

and thinking of them reminded her blatantly  Of Opportunity

of her powersher tantalizing hypersexuality 

her innocence

and naiveté   

she wasnt naïve  

she had assets 

she merely applied them for the best returnthe BIGGEST BANG for her fuck 

she was always surprised they seemed hurt afterwardssomehow misunderstanding the sum of the equation  

asif she somehow she took advantage of them 

that they werent worthy of her affections  and intentions

Christ look in the mirrorReally  Its simple  I played ya I played ya exactly like you play others Doesnt feel gooddoes it

she knew their hurt feelings were temporary a ploy 

Its a gamea fuckin game You have to strike your worth early an never let anyone take you down from the esteem you hold yourself in

If you were some kind of Gumby hangin out with a sidekick named Pokeyya fuckin kiddin me? you deserve exactly whacha got Pokey

even if she wasnt blessed with the fortune formulation of her genetics purely accidental she wouldnt let anyone prescribe or define her abilities 

she wasnt going to settle for anything less than what she determined was her due

so what if a couple of old men died under herGood riddance isnt that what they paid for besides their hardons were better dead than aliveIm just sayin  

she didnt suffer being too honest 

to her nothing was better in the world than honesty  cleansing

somehow it never came cheap or natural

it had to be tortured into existence

Oh, what a World! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uQJ8WrKnLUs

Little girl?

HA! Little girlmy ass

1410,  Thursday,  26  7. 18