on occasion his worse demon slovenly
summons him to breakfast at a national franchise
he preferredargued No lets go to a Mom an Pop a local place a small
greasy spoon where the oatmeal sticks to your ribs grits go with that sunnyside
up eggs opaque whites their yolks jiggle when the waitress walks up to the table
freshsqueeezed orange juice twisted amber
spools of flypaper hanging like garland near a poorlyrepaired torn screen door
it groaned National franchise a national franchise or Ill make the eggs
upset your guts and youll spend lotsa time in the head shitting
right about now his mother
would pale talk of food and shitting shouldnt
be had at the same table despite the real
processes that turn one into the other No
matter shed say that kind of talk is uncouth, and I’d assume a child from my
womb would prefer to be thought couth, be couth, than otherwise; correct?
when she put it that way
hed think about it
what she meant of course was that
heeven at this late date a fullblown adult a many-times-blown adult remained a reflection
of her and upon her and if he was uncouth then she was responsible
for his poor manners KaRIST!
admittedly he never cared for the sound of the word couth which was hard to believe because he loved the sound of cuntthey werent dissimilar
his
belief however wasnt randomwasnt some wild imagining psychological angst on his last birthday he received a quick note
from her through the mail and unlike heras his father was notorious for sending
newspaper clippings cartoon strips she sent him an birthday Astrology clipping a bit larger than a postage stamp he almost missed it it tucked itself in the
corner of the envelope
Aries (March 21 – April 19) You’ll
recognize your impact and become aware of what you were too modest to see
before – specifically, that there are those who cannot act normal around you
because your attractiveness is too distracting.
flattering he
was averse to flattery
when they spoke afterwards he
called her out she was coy You do recognise he said – he had to read the
clip to her because she said she didnt remember its content – that in a fashion
you compliment yourself
Of course I am. If it wasn’t me, and
your father, you wouldn’t be here with your physical attractiveness.
My fortunatelyformed face
he didnt
go into the possibility that the assessed attractiveness wasnt necessarily physical that might be lost on her she certainly had her vanity but
who didn’t
their conversation ran its
typical course
she wanted to talk about the
weather
she wanted to talk about the family
talking often descended into
complaining
he lived half the country away Rather than talking to me you ought to be
talking with themHEAR with them not to
them I know somewhere in that gray
matter thats been simmered beneath uncounted chemical colouring hairdryers
hairdresser appointments that you know your children are adults and you ought
to treat them in kind or unkind All I can do is listen If youre seeking constructive results thatll have to be between you and them
I know you know when
were the tables turned he missed the
memo
then it was his turn So you got a demon
Excuse me?
A demon an occasional bad habit it prodding you with its hotred tridentpoking
you with its pointy tail
What are you talking about?
Breakfast
A breakfast demon?
Sure A bastard breakfast demon that has to feed at
a franchise a corporate franchise where youre greeted by pastywhite extruded
sugar cookie characters bland I-do-what-Im-tolders
I don’t know what you’re talking
about?
You can hear me cant you
I can hear you. Although hearing
you, particularly you, doesn’t mean I always understand a word you're saying.
What was I saying
Something about going to breakfast
with a demon . . . at a Denny’s? . .
.
. Bingo
At a Denny’s?
At a Denny’s
Why not an I-Hop? . .
. . Bingo!
Ha! What do I win?
Clever I like that youre playing the game with me
I’m trying.
Yah The cretin prefers corporate to Mom an Pop
places local eats cant convince the clown Although I ought to be grateful he doesnt ooze
up into my consciousness perch on my shoulder with any frequency
Perches oozing on your shoulder?
Youre getting good at this
I try.
Thank you
Frankly I just try to go along
with the pictures you paint; you might not have realised all those years ago
when your brothers and sisters, when we were riding home in the car at night
from visiting relatives, and they wanted you to tell them a story, stories that
they often fell asleep to, that your father and I were also listening.
No I didnt know that When I was telling the stories I just thought
you and Dad were up front talking about the visit
No. We listened too. You were,
are, such a good storyteller. I suppose that’s what you’re doing now, talking about
this demon and Denny’s.
Perhaps But the crux of this tale is corporate
disinterest even at the entry levelthe boots on the groundthe lackluster
obedience to the sociopaths who run it American-style capitalism at its best
Ya dig
I dig.
I ended up blowing off the
demonleft to him to his own devises stranded maybe Ive shook him at
long last No I didnt Hes destine to emerge again Probably wearing new spurs and wielding a stiff
riding cropnot that a good riding crop is a bad thing every now and again But I
digress
What made me turnaround and leave
were the banners hanging all over the restauranthanging in every plateglass
window facing out fitted in the illuminated placards beside food items colour palates
consciouslycontrived to please the eye
even the blind to see
I’m listening.
Im catching my breath
I have a hard time accepting this
in America Businesses operating on
Sundaysemployees being squeezed part-time trying to make ends
meet while dancing between three four five part-time jobsno benefits minimum
wage I think maybe a few bombs ought to
go off in boardroomsCEOs and boards smeared on wall like Jackson Pollock
paintings Maybe
Preaching to the choir, son.
Yes
I bugged out of Denny’s because
the banners were braying KIDS EAT FREE 4PM
to 10PM
Why would a child be eating at 10
oclock at night when they ought to be home in bed 8 8:30 latest
After asking the wait time to be
seated I asked the extruded pasty cookieperson about the inanity of children eating
at 10did that mean as long as they were seated by10 they could eat FREE or did they
have to be finished by 10
She shrugged
She shrugged and apparently reading my eyessome intellect
presenting itself asked me if Id like to
talk to the manager
I said yes
The manager arrivednot much older
than the greeting cookieperson but a
cookieperson themselves
I reiterated myself
Brusquelyagain some intellect
presenting must have picked up on my
sarcasm As long as they’re seated by 10.
I asked if he didnt think that
was a little late for a childif the child was limited to a strict menu or could
order for FREE anything off the menu
I could see he desperately wanted
to ask What do you think, smartass? Had
he I would have respected him more
He said We have a FREE child’s
menu.
And I asked Isnt 10 oclock a little latewhy not 2PM to 8
He said because those hours were
the hours corporate had determined. Kids are eating FREE, sir.
Kids put me off I prefer calling them children . .
.
. They’re not goats.
As you have always said You can understand youve tainted me
Then I did my job.
You did You prejudiced the hell out of me
I thanked him Thank you sir I said
I said he could seat him pointed with my thumb over my shoulder at the
demon he couldnt see and said I wasnt staying to eat
He looked over my shoulder
There wasnt anyone behind me
He looked a little disturbed
Before I left I told him he might
want to question his superiors why 10 oclockwhy not the hours I recommended OR
at least open the menu up for the children to eat what they wanted rather than what corporate allowed them to eat
I suggest you push my
recommendations up the food chain
Show some initiative
Im sure he thought I was THAT
customer that day
It’s a different time, isn’t it,
son.
Yes Different
Certainly not better
