31.12.24


. . . thas irritating  so fuckin irritating

What’s that?

Bullshit reply
                  I am not ready to receive

    Ohyeah.


Ohyah
        Got something elsesomething moresomething other  than    Oohyah
Sez shit

But you know what they mean.

If I knew wha they meant I woudnt be irritated suppressed an lacerating eyeroll

    They’re . . they’re not ready to hear what you have to say.

Not their choice
                  They don get to posit an opinion then dictate my reply to question it or remark or make an insight
Growup

But you can appreciat . .
. . No  I cant   I cant
                       They cant take the heat stay the fuck out of the kitchen
A time-honoured classic oldfashion  fuckinlegacy idiom

Know idiom

I do.

Im all ears


    Maybe I don’t.

Why are you engaging me on their behalf  in their defence

They’re friends.

Shoud have taken them home earlier or better yet not have brought them in the first place

We met here.

Then  youve no reason to standup forem

                                                    Idiom

Phrase or expression tha largely or exclusivelyknow exclusive they nodded  exclusively carries a figurative or non-literal meaning cant take the heat stay the fuck out of the kitchen rather than makin literal sense

Can you convey tha toem reduce their barriertheir inability  to receive

Unlikely.
             You understand they’ve said as much.
No
     Cunts
  
757preferred,  Tuesday,  31  12. 24
2302,  Tuesday,  31  12. 24

he exhausted the notes he made on his salvaged BEAR-OF-A-CLIPboard

paper one side naked

opposite sides scribbled on or THIS PAGE INTENTIONALLY LEFT BLANK
                                                                                if printed on
IT AINT BLANK

though maybe someone had patented INTENTIONALLY and any-an-all business transactions bills what-have-you contract language  demanded a page that was blank had to be branded such
                                                                                    off the top of his head  probably had near a dozen clipped

WASTE NOT WANT NOT was a fan of President Carter  fan of his malaise speech
                                                                                         though even before Carter made it he had made sure the apartments thermostat during the winter was set at 60degrees made his wife furiousbut she was from southern California

they lived in Minneapolis

Put a sweater on

I should be able to enjoy warmth in my home.

You do Thaswhy we took an apartment with a fireplace an why I  we  stock cordwood on the patio Throw on a sweatshirt sweater make a fire
Play Jack London with me

Hell I let you put your cold feet on my belly at night

    To Build a Fire?

Correct

Man died.

Correct
            I wont let you die

Then let me up the thermostat.

Whats up he refrained from saying Doc

    Say . . . seventyfive.

she was negotiating the Jew in her coming out despite no Jew in her
                                                                            No
Seventytwo.

Jew

Ill build the fire Put on laye . .
. . You’re not being fair. You grew up out here made it sound like the fuckin wilderness me in Californ . .
. . Where do you live

 
    Put on layers
                      Ill stoke a good fireso good  I bet you fall asleep in front of it


a client of the construction company he worked for had apple trees they wanted cut down
                                                                                                You cut ‘em down I’ll pay ya your time.

he liked his sentence ran-on  a bull rushHA  bum rush
No thanks
            I cutem down  hewem   woods mine

look at him being a Jew

    Could I have some of the wood?
Whas some If I can stackkeep the wood here    Some
                                                           guy was urban  notoriety of burning wood would recede building a fire took effort

very unJewish he tossed the dice

OHCHRIST did he slay him
                               urban took a deep sliver  let all the wind out of his sailsank his coloured balloon
imagined it wasnt gayly coloured  black balloons   like when a clown turns forty or fifty


I got ya babe



there were notes that didnt appeal to him at the time
                                                         for shitsangiggles flipped the page

(Plan you will revert to after the service agreement period expires)

like any cellular phone user would remember on the anniversary of their one-year two-year plan that their signing benefits disappeared and their rates per phone would increase substantially  A LOT

remembered keenly
                      by his own discretionbehind managements back he let them suffer a months expense at the reverted rate then altered computer code to restore their signing benefits because the company hadnt a plan to reach out to them and negotiate new contracts
                                         their business model
Fuck their business model

It was being a Jew

 

almost lost his job over that horseshit
                                       however  he argued persuasively
his clients would leave
because they were cheated not really
                                           and his company would suffer dramatic CHURN which upper management received monthly monetary bonuses keeping low

he had the whole wide CHURN in his hands

anif he went
              hed blow the whistle on them

which would require them to repay months and months and months (re: year/s) of generous bonuses (with interest) and explain how an underling had access to proprietary computer coding that they hadnt created safeguards against him from accessing them

    did Jews use blackmail  strongarm tactics

he believed they were among their arsenal      

Monday,  29  3. 04
1501,  Tuesday,  31  12. 24

Sonny & Cher  I Got You Babe  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HKGjCPBSG38

he urinated outofdoors whenever he could wherever it was appropriatepossible   sometimes not

figured ifever caught hed tell the cop
                                          have to be a cop commonfolk aint interested in a man goinbout his business Nature calls  who was he to mess with Maw Nature  
clearing his throat
                    One Im tryin not to waste water flushin  Two Im watering plants like rain Three I make damn certain Im not publically exposed  Don own a trench coat sprinklemix it with a little humour

hes not been caught
not that he would

decades of practise


was visiting a friend who lived rural remote
                                                 Need to take a leak

tossed a thumb over his shoulder There’s a can off thewhere you going?

Outside

What do you mean outside?

Might ask wha you mean as he went to the back door

Outside?

assumed rhetorical


    hoppedup on roughly a foothigh wall fashioned of broken stone separating a paver patio from earth and plants naked ladies belladonna lilies deepgreen leaf sheaths prolific impressiveobviously enjoyed the few winter rain squalls
something to ponder while takin a leak

leaking pondering flipped
                              earth at the mouth of a downspout was heavilylittered with pebbles gravel  and between the boil of his stream and its shifting like squat on a toilet staring at textured linoleum  faces
                                                                                                   beneath the billowing shag of an afro a Negroid face peeredup at him apathetically  which evolved shapechanged  eyes agape blinked averted closed brow furrowed smoothed unconcerned head leaned left profile yawned jaw snapped shut grimaced turned back  shapechanged  crown of thorns  Jesus
                                                        JESUS said it
then the whole collapseddisassembled into a fast play of assimilatingmugs  broke  cast about like marbles rimshots parcels took a breath
                         submerged


  shook his cock

walked back inside


I can’t believe you pissed in my backyard.

I saw Jesus

after 5PM,  Saturday,  29  12. 24
1132,  Tuesday,  31  12. 24

Jesus Christ Superstar  Trial Before Pilate – 39 lashes  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_FnL7mKhFg

30.12.24


their paths crossed

should have assumed it would happen one day


she was working

she looked beautiful

seemed happy  healthy

they were startled

he was passing through a store

taking one of his notorious shortcuts


they nodded

he kept walking

she caught him outside the rear exitWait.

he turned

Can we walk?

he held out his hand

she took it

they walked for a while without speaking

looking at each other


You still eat figs off the trees

Yes.

Thas wonderful




What happened?

she asked honestly

she had been part of it
                           their separation
it wasnt angry

then it was terribly necessary

health concerns needed devout attention


they still loved each other
                             it seemed at that moment Time had stood still it hadnt

he smiled at her

she smiled at him

there were tears in their eyes

he answered

    Inevitable      Unexpectedly

early AM,  Monday,  30  12. 24
1405,  Monday

    Blessed
                 You run with it
Yahavent said    Yawont say unless I lean on you
                                                                      Wha

You brought it up.
Occur to you I usually bring most things up
                                                  You come along like a beat dog a dog on leash

That’s rude.

    Its honest

Like tha bullshit art your friend tried to pawn off on me

You knew better

Said shit


    I thought it was nice that she wante . .
. . To troll me
Youve been in my house

Seen anything comparable to that drivel


She meant it to be whimsical.

Asshole
           You shoud have corrected herput your foot down   You knew better

It was a Christmas presen . .
. . Thaya put your name onwrapped
                                         You wrapped it      Wrapped it shittily
As the shit it is Im not keepinit

Return it to her She can use it next year as a white elephant gift

                                                                            Besides the point   Blessed

Blessed?
Run with it

What do you mean?

Whadaya mean

Mean?

Blessed

    What’s it mean to me?

Ah  apparently your brain showed
                                           Yes

What do you want me to say?

Whaever ya have to say


    I don’t know.

Gimme something
                       Ive told you
Told me.
FUCK
          Leftie
Oh.
      Yeah.



    Bliss?

Arya askin


Bliss.

 

Go a step furthur

Further?

Like yanking teeth
                       Yah

 

I got nothing.


Flawless

after 3PM,  Saturday,  29  12. 24
2024,  Monday,  30  12. 24
Moody Blues  Procession & The Story In Your Eyes  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A6EFytM1sxM

blessed is a poignant word


    he wouldnt use it in a religious context
                                                         thinking about it
he couldnt remember a time he had



Whadaya think about the word blessed

Blessed? You mean religiously?

No
        Think youve ever used it

I’m sure I have . . casually . . . Thanksgiving . . it’s certainly a blessing to have and enjoy family gathered together . Christmas.
                Yeah.
Why?

I um  I  cant think of a time I have I  tread  lightly where connotations might be assumed religious   Like yourself

The reason why I asked you

Can you think of a tim . .
. . I cant

                     Lemme think    I got take a leak
Be back

You can do two things at once?
I can
       Im an extraordinary man  chuckled
walked away from the patio the picnic table they were sitting at over to trimmedback dormant roses at the planked fenceline
             relieving himself he thought



  then

he knew


he returnedhad tears in his eyes

his voice was remarkably stable  committed
                                                     I know
You know?

Blessed

That was quick.

When I put my considerable mind to something invariably something in the neighbourhood shakes out

    Considerable?

Youre listeninconsiderable  yes

Alright.  What?

I was blessed to have leftie in my life
                                           Without me being aware she  she was  consoling  loving    an attentive companion


She was a cat.

She was unlike any cat Ive ever hadever had the joy   to care for
                                                                         Annow tha shes homeher ashes  over this quiet Christmas I realised the perfect place to keep her when I am not holding her

You hol . .
. . Yes I do
               You underestimate how deep a cut her death was

I hold her while I write read  watch a program

    She comforts me  even now

That’s disturbing.

    For someone who doesnt visit his parents gravesnot fifteen minutes away on any array of special days birthdays anniversaries holidays  you might appreciateunderstand your disturbed is very  slight

I am blessed leftie was in my life

after 3PM,  Saturday,  29  12. 24
1525,  Monday,  30  12. 24
Warren Zevon  Knockin' on Heaven's Doors  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=euBuVh_BUe4

day late dollar short


his mother said of him

too many to count teachers said of him
                                          he had done something too late without enough effort
missed opportunities because he was late lacked resourcesBULLSHIT

his Maw teachers didnt take kindly to it
he didnt apologise
                    his resources were abundanttoo abundant yes he was late better late than never
because he refused to do something hafass refused to turn in a lesser product for some adulation or better LETTER grade
         cost him one grade every day late

he usually received Cs with the caustic printed note at the end of the paper Had you turned this in on time you have earned an A.FUCK YOU he earned an A according to him and that was all that was important

his mother
             Wait till your father gets home.

as a boy the bareass spankings hurt
                                        but
her threats his punishments fell away by the time he was a high school sophomore  physicallybuilt by the hard labor he did to earn money
                    he wanted something he asked no one  bought it himself



day late dollar short
                      meant yesterday   sixthousandninehunred sixtynines

there was an excellent chance he would have knocked the tar out of eighteenyearstwenty days had he accumulated tabulated into it the four scathing months with Chris

he overlooked her skinny chicken legs for her stunninglyhuge breasts delectable aureoles nipples

not two weeks into their torrid affair he knew he made the right decisionend of the first week her mother returned to Maryland for three weeks leaving Chris alone in their apartmentAMEN
                                                                           and
her thinthighs not hamthighs granted him amazing access to her sweet pussy clit  ass
muffled Tryin to break my nosesuffocate me
                                                  laughinggayly holding his cock like a saddle horn
No baby, aintnever felt a mouthtongueteeth like yourscant  get enough of a good thing yaknow?
never answered
                  was too busy gulpin compoundedbreaths to avert unconsciousness while she lappedsuckeddevoured his cock


    Shoudakept tally

1700,  Sunday,  29  12. 24
1314,  Monday,  30  12. 24

sometimes he had a hard time getting off certain subject matters
                                                                     949 this morning
bent at the waistmade a deft snatch
                                       pickedup a beer bottle cap that had fallen from a bookshelf when two cats bangedup against it during a kerfuffle between them  brother sister spat

got siblings

understand that

the cap Coors Banquet from a commemorative 1936 Stubby bottle

inside the cap a message is inscribed
                                         LUCK IS HARD WORK RESIDUE
he has a second at his desk
                               WHAT YOU’RE MADE OF MATTERS
obviously they spoke to him
 

 

certain subject matters


A deft snatch
                he commented after picking it up
bypassing his usual manner thumb index finger opting instead for index middle finger

setting the cap back on the bookcase  he chuckled
                                                         his comment reminded him of Chris
a certain old girlfriend Miami teenager whose chicken legs he overlooked because mama had awesome mammarieshow she didnt topple was beyond him
                                     You know physics
No.

Excellent

Why?

Because baby youre defying it
                                 Comere he said as he scooped one out from her scoopedneck looseknit tshirt


    double entendre

Monday,  30  12. 24
1143,  Monday
Neil Young  Cinnamon Girl  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ck_MfAdmTeg

29.12.24


You got to go dark?

My best side  Profile

Really? rolling his eyes

Really  Its not a dark question
                                     Woudnt ask if it wasnt evident    A simple ask
    You’d ask someone that?

Id rather they admit it on their own
                                          Lotsa of unhappy people who are just biddin time playin out string not seekin happinesswhich  to me  is a crimelifes too short

So they should take your opinion? A monk.

Ascetic My choice
                      You don think Im happy with my lifecomin an goin as I please go to bed when I want wake when I want nobody lordintryin to lord over me answer to no one but myself
                                                                          Im peachy keen an then some
Id ask in a heartbeat
                          Because  if me  Id say    Lemmesay this about my marriage my spouse I tolerate themWoo
We get along to get along  Why woud I pursue happiness


You think it’s like that out there?

You tell me you have experience
                                     You tolerated a bad marriage for better than four years until you didnt
To your credit

Which is why people ought to date for a long while

If month after month the relationship is ticking down  apparent trend   Why marry early
Keep track  Each person 

I found someone.

Ya can loseem as easy
                            This just aint workin out
THEN  But I love you.

Love

       Harbor   Drydock For wha oncewere seagoing vessels
Tide lappin their hulls

Not blue whitetopped waves

No wind in their sails

    Settling


You’re not a romantic.
Oh
     But I am  I am

But I refuse to be landlocked cocklocked or women cuntlocked

                                                                             Ever sail

approaching 3PM,  Saturday,  29  12. 24
1502,  Sunday,  29  12. 24

Christopher Cross  Sailing  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MEO6gYCFbr0 

Big Head Todd and the Monsters  Bittersweet  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RuUNfC3tTI8