Awshit

            had to bitch about rites of passage theyre supposed to be had as a kid

Nope it freakin rears up and bites him in the ass

he got a robocall from the pharmacy

                                      his prescription Thats a hoot doc my prescription is ready to be pickup

he walked over pulled a paperback from the shelves Candy to read as he walked for shits and giggles he went back to it every fourfive years it reminded him of high school study hall freshman year his buddy Mark he was failed in grade school so a year older freshman a real pervert should have seen the storage he kept at the back of his closet  Mark got a copy into his hands he read it holding it inside a textbook  fooled the monitor

at the pharmacy it occurred to him

                                     there were many things in his life that escaped his notice contemporaneously just didnt pay them no mind

                          when he was a kid all the pharmacists save his favourite were myopic older men wearing white jackets their names embroidered on their breasts reminded him of his Dads bowling shirt  Botch  Can I help you, young man?

       standing in line he eyeballed the four pharmacists behind the counter he was healthydidnt take medications as a matter of fact at his annual checkups he wrote down the vitamins and supplements he took in lieu of medication which inevitably precipitated the nurse to return to him soft empathy oozing out of her or his eyes Joe, I think you misunderstood, on this portion of the form we need you to list the medications you’re taking.

                                                                                Oh yare so sweet like chocolatecovered candy a nougat center I don take medications

                                         it was a bit shock and awe the pharmacists were young very attractive women one of his internal morons spoke  Go ahead now, which is your favourite treat, I’ll bet she ends up helping you.   I cant decide   Kinda like being in a pastry shop or as a kid in a candy store with your nose pressed up against the glass.   Very kinda

                                                                                                                     frankly to himself an aside his moron couldnt pickup on it reminded him of the time he picked up a Playboy at the newsstand for shits and giggles an it wasnt funny at all he was threefour years older than the centerfold 

                                                                                               although  ancorrectly the difference was a matter of being a virgin not having sex then having all the sex he could handle

                                                                                                     anthen some

he selected his favourite pharmacist tall equine longneck  highbreasts

moron seconded it

                    I knew it! Mine too!

the attendant motioned to him to step up You’re next.

he gave her his name 

she excused herself then returned with his prescription rang him up Do you need a consultation with one of the pharmacists?

I do

If you step to your right, to the next window, I’ll have one speak to you shortly.

Thank you very much

You’re welcome. Next.

She coming?

Shaddup moron

She coming now?

                   I think we ought to make a bet.

A bet

Doncha think?

Whadaya got to bet

I . . got . .

. . Bupkis

Lotsa bupkis. DAMN.

                      A gentleman’s wager?

We arent gentlemen

No. We’re not.

               How do scoundrels bet?

Bet Nah  They cheat

                       Lets see if we get luck  Ya feelin lucky punk

Dirty Harry!

Thas my boy

they crushed it

                 Our girl!

Woman

Ohshityah, our woman!

Good afternoon, I understand you’re unfamiliar with your she turned the prescription in her hand Tadalafil

Aint that a pip TADAlafil  Cialis he laughed deeplynot of embarrassment just for the joy of its generic name 

                                                                                                                          he glanced at her name embroidered on her hygienicwhite jacket breast

                                                              Ciara she looked up from the package and into his eyes Good The things we do for love

1621,  ReggaeFriday,  22  10. 21

1149,  Sunday – HAPPY HALLOWEEN,  31  10. 21

from behind someone bumped his shoulder

                                              A penny for your thoughts.

he hafturned laughed

                        Bruce ya sneakinup on me

A herd of elephants could sneak up on you. I walked past the window, you were looking out, I thought you saw me, I waved. You kept looking, you didn’t. I haven’t nowhere to be so I thought I’d take a chance and come in, have a cup of coffee with you. You weren’t writing, I looked at your table and didn’t see any paper or pen.

he cleared his throat he hadnt talked with anyone today save the attendant to order black coffee in a mug

                                                                                                                No  No  Got em here but Im thinking just now

Again, a penny for your thoughts.

Ante up

Bruce laughed

                Who carries money let alone change these days? I got plastic, you accept VISA or MasterCard?

Gimme a moment

                   he pushed back away from the table  rose   walked aimlessly around the shop his head down  stopped  squattedpicked up something  walked back to the table

                                                                      he held out his hand  nickel dime two pennies  handing a penny to Bruce he sat againpulled the chair closer to the cafe table

                                                                                 Now ante up

Bruce laughed again pushed the penny under his fingertip across the table to Joe

                                                                                       A penny for your thoughts.

his turn to laugh

                  I should have thought to negotiate  Idiot  This pennyll buy you more than you care to hear

I’ll be the judge of that.

Nah yare fidgetyyouve always been Couldnt sit still when we were kids Make a side betfive bucks Ohwait  never mind  I wouldnt be able to collect for a while Nevermind

I said I’ll be the judge of that.

Ive prejudged you Minority Report Philip K. Dick Precrime

I didn’t know you had such low expectations of me.

Its your penny

                Remember Im just thinking  but were getting off track

I was thinking about the outbreak of STDs in old age homes Gawd Bless Em

What are you talking about?

You hadnt heard

                  Imagine  Eighty years oldpossibly with the same man or woman your whole life children family  get your ass parked in a homeNOW  you contract an STDyour first  Wasnt a risk your whole life prior  Then infected in a facility

        I don know if thats ironic black humour or just fucking hilarious

Jesus, Joe, I . ah . . no, hadn’t heard . . though it ain’t funny.

You don think thats funnyI think its a scream

                                                Like a man being born into a womans body or a woman in a mans think more often the latter  It would take that kind of woman to emasculate themselves

                                                                                      I appreciate their dilemmaI do  But also got to appreciate that Gawds got a fucked up sense of humour  an some people get on their knees to Him  at least you knew where you stood if you crossed a Greek god or goddess  Theyd turn you into a worm or stone at a glance  make you have sex with animals  and an Like it

Jesus, man.

Your penny  But I have a solution

                                     When my daughter was an RA resident advisor in college on her livingroom coffee table she had this huge glass globe fishbowl  I walked up to it  inside were all these colourful wrappers  I thought they were individually wrapped chocolates  a place card before it  Help Yourself

Chocolates, huh, bet she saw lots of residents with that as bait.

She did see lots of residents

                              They were condomsfuckin Glow-in-the-Dark Flavoured Studded Ribbed Warming Pleasure-Shaped Coloured Kiss-of-Chocolate Kiss-of-Mint French Ticklers Tingling Pleasure condoms for both partners fuckinfucking Edible condoms

                               I helped myself  At the very least had to replace the one in my wallet

You what?

I helped myself Why not  Kids today lack rites of passagestolen out from under them

Rites of Passage?

Yah

What rites?

Having to go to a pharmacy buy rubberstheyre kept behind the counter ask a pharmacists help

                                                                                                    But Ill go one betterId bet no fuckin American male would do this to become a man

To become a man.

Rite of Passageits a fuckin rite of passage  Do not pass Go Do not collect twohunred dollars

                                                                                                 Yes to become a man

Alright, listening, I’m listening.

                                Not one American male.

No  Not one

             Maasai tribe  Kenya  Of old  A boy had to kill a lion with a spear

Spartan agoge  thirteen year training starts at seven  It means raising

                                                                            Not one American male 

Boys and girls gypped

What’s a girl’s rite of passage?

Ask a girl

           Anso  not to get off the beaten pathconclude my tirade ailing STD-dosed elders  the leg up 

                                                                                                            A big glass globe fishbowl of colourful individually wrapped Viagra Cialis Levitra Stendra  anfor the wholesome nonchem souls in another globe they can chew on Tribulus T-levels baby  Maca Red ginseng Fenugreekthats a fun onehuh Saffron Ginkgo biloba L-citrulline  also abundant in watermelon  watermelon   watermelon

What are you doing?

Riffin just riffin

                 This is exhaustingfucking penny for your thoughts

Although you didnt bug

                          Mustve been the sex

Sex sells.

It do at dat

  

1621,  ReggaeFriday,  22  10. 21

1231,  Saturday,  30  10. 21

10cc  The Things We Do for Love  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0qycxTpMb5U      

 

he liked to play games

                       he liked to play with himself

  he liked to play in the Dark

                                         it took him a while to befriend It

Dark was a terrifyinghulking monster

                                       that was his impression of It before he forced himself to meet It on Its term

It may have feared him

                        Yahright he was a small nine year old boy  like he could inspire fear

it took him months of deliberate effort to conquer his fear

                                                            It waited patiently

It groanedmaybe if It hadnt groaned hed have come along quicker as he ran into things in the basement stumblingbanging himselfbeating himself up

then one evening in the cold concretebrick bowels of the familys onehunred year old house  pantingpanting 

                                                                                                                he didnt run

he didnt run  he remained still like a small woodland animal  refused to boltbetray himself give up to a lurking predator

Dark sighed About time, little thing, you’ve finally, at long last, come to your senses; what you fear about me is what you fear in yourself.

they became fast friends

It brought him through the warbrought him back home

he liked to walk at night

                           Where you going?   Out for a walk   Where? a tinge of jealousy   Where  Around  Wherever

several relationships failed

                            oblivously they werent worth having jealous of the Dark

some fools broke into his house

three to be exact

flashlights

           only get a flash

it was gruesome

police got sick

he had a handaxethey hadnt a chancenot a chance with Dark on his side

he saw worse during the war

they played the wrong game in the wrong house against the wrong adversaries

Are you alright?

I am Thank you

Stop thanking me.

                   Our relationship is because of your initiative, willfulness, as a boy.

he sighed But you got my back

Yes. I’ll always have your back.        

2306, ReggaeFriday,  29  10. 21

0947,  Saturday,  30  10. 21

 

No no, I said de rigueur.

I heard you

it was a sunny day

                     he enjoyed it warming his backmaking butter inside his artificial shoulders which ached like the real deal they replaced

                         his belief  once his body was opened to the atmosphere by his surgeries the new rules governing him that he wasnt allowed to participate in writing were written

  

You know what I’m talking about when I say de rigueur?

I do  do you

             You picked it up off your smartphoneyour Word he relished Wordhe was enthused pronouncing it  for the Day

he could see in his face he irritated him 

                                      Yes, yes I did.

Yes you did  Id have been more impressed if you learned it while reading

I wasnt trying to impres . .

. . You wereYawere  you were   You were trying to own it

                                                             If I hadnt said you might not have admitted it Wish I knew wha that was about

                     Whas that about

he could see he was really irritating him

                                          Nothing.

Ah  The sun feels good

                          Wouldya like another beer

I don’t know.

Im up for another

Then yes, another, please.

Ya gotta it

           When I return well talk about rigor mortis   Out of strictness de rigueur  anaint a damn thing stricter than death Ive got a seque in mind

                                I think funny Be back 

he might have said Don’t hurry at his back

There ya go

            Where were we he knew damn well its a game he played with him a bit cat an mouse  he couldnt help himself

Where were we?

hed be strict never was much of a game player it irritated him as much as it humoured him

                                                                                                  Rigor mortis  As to de rigueur Definitely the same ball park 

How do you see that?

he stifled a sigh  Rigueur  Rigor

                                 Im sure Word for the Day explainedif you read deeper  rigueur is French for rigor

he could see he was really irritating him  again 

                                                  Perhaps.

perhaps horseshit he was tempted to have him go into his smartphone and bring it up

                                                                                           but only tempted he was a recovering Catholic Cathlaholic anif it taught him anything it did teach him to disregard temptation he was a need not a want cat

Perhaps

          Thats bogus

Excuse me . .

. . Aint speaking French  rigueur    Bogus

                                              Nevertheless lets playhave some fun I think I can tell you something I think youd know but may not Well hung  Know where that comes from

I know what it is.

Yes

Duh . . well-endowed.

he played stupid to make him say it 

                                      Well-endowed Moneyed

No.

    irritation rising again

Play the game

To have a big cock.

Was that so hard

                   Im not well-endowedprobably a good thing If I were Id be in constant trouble with the police If I had a huge cock I wouldnt wear pants

                                    not even a snicker Nuthin

You’re ridiculous.

Ofcourse I am

               Well hung From hanging a man Often they got an erectionsome ejaculated ya can see how autoerotic asphyxiation has come into play

                                  But on top that if we die in our beds likely leaving well have erection

I’m sorry your father’s gone.

                              Anthere we are  Lying there with boners 

                                                                          Like waking up most mornings stared at by Ol One-eye Bout time you’re up, I’ve been up an hour.

he cracked a smile

                     or maybe its because hes had three beers

                                                                  Ya know that

I did not.

Ah rigueur   

1621,  ReggaeFriday,  22  10. 21

1614,  ReggaeFriday,  29  10. 21

Soft Machine  Kings and Queens  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wC7wApIxEu0

 

from sextrifecta  28  7. 21

                              Woudja rather get head from a woman who waxes eloquently studiously or a woman who mumbles unassured in broken English

who it was asked of was perplexed

                                     asif he asked him in a foreign languagein words he hadnt heard before

Ya kiddin me man aint even a coin toss

                                          Don get me wrong I wouldnt kick either out of bed for eating crackers HMM additional grit would be tantalising Got head from a chick who really liked Pop Rocks I remember her grinning up at me   You ready? This’ll blow your mind. getting blownhis mind getting blown a twofer  hed be nuts not to have a go  Im ready Im in your han . . ha mouth   she laughedher gaiety tickled him  It’s cherry.   Cherry like me   That’s why I chose it, way ahead of you, baby. 

                                   they had to shower afterwards sticky redtinged saliva about his cock belly slicking his scrotum all over her face chincheeks down her throat  drizzled breasts

showered off they went at each other again

                                              it became their thingmaking venues of different rooms in their apartmentsfriends apartments swimming pools on the beach backseats of unlocked carsthey couldnt get enough of each other  friends hafexpected theyd get arrested for indecent exposure

                                                                          all their missionaryfriends

 

sextrifecta had played with the words literally  probabilist wellpractised theyd be kind sexaids while going down on a woman literallytickling their pussies perineum anuses fancies

                                                                 he realised another Say linearly

I’m not.

         I know this shit tickles you more than it should.

It tickles me cuz yare such a monk like giving heads a crimeonly a criminal would go down on women

                                                                                                          As Ive told ya man its a twoway street you expect it but yawont return the pleasure

No. I’m not playing.

Linearly

Not playing.

Linearly

If you don’t shut up I’ll pullover and let you out, you can walk home.

Pullover  Linearly with the curb

1117,  ReggaeFriday,  29  10. 21

Soft Machine  Out-Bloody-Rageous  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X9O2lg1Jd6s

 

since he heard ithe was sitting in his parents livingroom a young teenager watching late night The Maltese Falcon on their blackanwhite television set  he wanted to use Spades line  When you’re slapped, you’ll take it and like it. 

the opportunity never presented itself fists were balledpunches thrown before he thought to slap someone  a slap a fist along the lines of bringing a knife to a gunfight

                                                         but it always nibbled at the back of his brain Yah someday  Someday Ill be utterly tickled

Whas today man

                 one of his manymany interior malcontents snickered

SOMEDAY he bellowed

she rolledroiledwrithed naked across his lap her panties at her thighs rolled down just above her knees

                                                                                                              Who you talking to, baby?

Later not now

No no, not now . . not now, no not now . . she was enthralledfilled with delicious anticipation Baby, give ‘em to me now.

A moment babe Im relishing your ass ya have such a beautiful ass firm heartshape ass

                                                                                             she was way ahead of him in their little game

it was her birthday

he asked her what shed like

it swept out of her like a northerly

                                   I want you to give me birthday spankings

he kneaded her cheeks So beautifulhe cracked her gently with his hand

                                                                          One

she laughed deepmelodiously in her throatwiggled her ass

                                                            he cracked her again  Two

Yes, bab . .

           it caught in her throathis hand sounded like a gunshot the skin reddened where he cracked her

                                                                                                               she growled

hoarsely he whispered When youre slapped youll take it and like it

                                                                         Yes she laughed  Yes, baby, yes.            

he looked at her face in a big round wall mirror he leaned against his highboy there were tears in her eyes  their eyes met she nodded Yes. That’s it, love.

he intermingled gentle and hard slaps

                                         Damn babe, I can’t tel . .

                                                                   he quieted her with another crack

they were good together

                          An one more for good luck baby  a gentle crack on the ass

her fanny was bright red she was wet

he grabbed her across the breastshis hand in her armpit arm under her thighs he stood up from the foot of the bed

he made it with a chenille cover

                                  he figured the raised fabric might be insanely nutsintriguing on her sensitive skin

he rolled hershe turned against his chest facing him

she threw her arms around his neck kissed him hungrily

                                                            when she broke off the kissher arms still around his neck he walked across the foot of the bed up one side and gently placed her on the bed

                                                                                    Oooh, that feels crazy.

Spread your legs for me doll

her eyes were big and bright

he got between them admired her slickness he kissed hertongued her an listening to herher breath quickening he slipped up her body kissed her deeply plunged himself into her  her breath caught

                                                                                       Don move a muscle love

she moved

he tried to still her

                   Donmove baby

she laughedeyes wide mouth open

                                     It’s my birthday.

they orgasmed ferociously

  later   giggling

                  she kissed him lightly  I took it and I liked it, love.

Yadid yah yadid love

they fell asleep in each others arms

2047,  Day-between-Two-Ts,  20  10. 21

1251,  Thursday,  28  10. 21

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NFvEMs7B-VA