when he could finally lift his eyes off her beautiful face

                                                          her triumphant smile had slipped her colour draining and grey

over the top of her head he looked into her backyard her roses her wisteria breaking into bloom and fragrance her grapevines flourishing

                        anhe witnessed an abrupt winda sigh shake the plants  anfrom a dandelion a whitetopped woven seed shook free anrose into the air rose into the sky  climbing

he climbed on top of it

he wanted to be high

                       to look down on the world that was suddenly  empty    her lifeforce escaped 

                                                                                                           anhe rose high into the blue sky an found that he wasnt looking down into the neighbourhood where she died

                                                                                                he floated over the green pond that was a block over from the quadruplex they lived in in Minnesota when she was a little girl

                                                                                                         where he defied the posted sign No Swimming anhad her hold onto his trapeze as he breaststroked anchased dragonflies an tadpoles an the occasional big fish that rose near its center far from where people couldnt possibly cast

                                                                                            anhe saw her with a crooked stick in her hand he snapped off a fallen limb an tied a string to an fixed a hook on an baited with a split earthworm they dug up an watched as she cried proudly Daddy! I caught fish! anhe freed the small perch or bluegill an had her hold it an tell it Go get your bigger brother or sister to come for me to catch . . anhe made her kiss it goodbye which she did because he told her They were so kind to play with you, don’t you think they deserve a kiss goodbye? You might not ever see them again. They may swim down down down past the Frog Prince’s castle who on occasion has come to our front door to pursue you to the hole in the bottom of the pond that connects to a winding tunnel that lets them swim free to the other ponds and lakes around us.

up up up down down down  deep inside himself he sought comfort with memories

his baby girl had just died

1439,  Sunday,  23  2. 20

1449,  Thursday,  3  9. 20