29.3.21

$552K -- American deaths by Trump virus

 
Liars liars  pants on fire  your nose is longer than a telephone wire 
got to have some levity 
                        otherwise ones intention towards Birx CDCs Redfield might be murderous they kept the former FAKE PRESIDENTs lies

https://www.msnbc.com/deadline-white-house/watch/-because-it-was-lies-olivia-troye-says-there-should-be-a-full-investigation-into-the-trump-admin-covid-response-109338693863

he had to excuse himself 
                         he was going to vomit

1704,  Monday,  29  3. 21

 

 


  

she got a bug up her ass and he wasnt going to help her out with it

it was her bug

at most her sighing and ogling bugged him

Look how fit they are.

sixseven guys preening across the room from them

granted  she was worth preening about

Aren’t they fit?

Yah thats wha youth gives ya

What do you mean by that? she asked an edge in her voice

he wasnt buying into her game  her bug 
                                          Wha I said
But what do you mean?

Wha I said

What are you, implying?

No implication Im acknowledging their youth

You’re implying, aren't you . . I’m not young?

Yaint old Besides  theyre gathering like straysnotice theres no other women in the room theyre on the scent  Which ought to speak volumes
You’re judgin . .
. . Im observing them 
                      Ya got eyes yasee another woman in here Yare flattered by their attentiontheir undivided salivating  

No.  You’re judging them. 


Listen you asked me to take you out for a cocktail I have Yahave my attention but they seem to have yours So lets cut to the chase if yare so enamoured with the young fit men across the room I can leave you to your druthersyer attentions intentions

Yawanna pull a train Choo Choo Wanna be part of a gangbang Bang Bang Wanna risk rape Yasay No they say Didnt hear ya  No means Yes 
Knock yerself out

When ya finish your drink Im not hangin out Im headin home Anif ya stay yacan stop by an pickup your things later

Pick up my things. You’re being mean, you're being coercive.

Im not Im not buyin into drauma  Ive told ya that 
                                                       Ya got a bug up yer ass an thats on you
We got a good thing until it isnt

Not strongarmin ya

Do whayawanna do

 

You’re jealous.

Weak Yaknow Im not  Not in my makeup

Maybe sometimes a girl wants her man to be jealous. 

Wouldnt be much of a man 
                               Im not tellin ya not to enjoy the attention If they werent theyd be blind  Im sayin donlet it go to yer head


We got a good thing
                      until it isnt 

AM-ish first – now 1241,  Sunday,  28  3. 21

Grachan Moncur III  New Africa  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Xo0mzj-lg4

28.3.21

 

Because you scared the shit out of me 
                                        when you blubber through tears and sobsclutch at your heart because it feels like it is going to explode  because you scared the shit out of me legitimises the scene youve created you neednt apologise the fearthe discombobulation your frenzy is excused because if your witnesswitnesses have humanity compassion have empathy they will give you room because they fear that time when their card is turned and it will be turned and the irretrievablenessthe abyssthe blackness thats enveloped you will be theirs


Because you scared the shit out of me 
                                       he was breathless  he woke crying  
he awakened crying before 


he was grateful he didnt share his bed with anyone 
                                                     because sharing it they were intimate and they would naturally want to try and comfort him  but there was no comfortno wordsno embrace that could

a fools errand to console him 

nor did he want to be consoled  he wanted the timethis time as before as will be he wanted these discrete times involute inviolate to suffer to learn to manage to accept what is unacceptable

 

Because you scared the shit out of me 
                                         he cried it now out loud  he cried it often because he could never tell hershe would never hear him

Death cauterises one from the other

she felt otherwise

he did not

 

he suffered her death as an amputation 
                                          the irretrievableness is as real as feelingsuffering pain in his ghost limb

0744,  Thursday,  25  3. 21
1414,  Reggae Friday,  26  3. 21

 

she placed the stick in her urine stream

she wasnt notoriousshe didnt sleep around
                                            but when her itch – as her father called it – kicked in it led her around by her pussy  assheassumed a guy would be led by his cock

Lucky fuckin guys  she mused as she held the stickkept her fingers up so not to wet them 

she wasnt offended by urine 
                             shed been initiated  golden showers  a humourous lover whose humour fled him when she straddled his shoulders and urinated on his throat and chin 
                                                                Lay still she said Im being careful  she was managing her stream and bladder so not to urine on his lips in his mouth  which by his resulting distemperhis haranguing whining  she wished she had
                     Ya got yer nerve  its all fun and games when yare pissing then flipped around you the reci-pee-nt  she could be clever  though wasnt the clever bitch he accused her of being
Yasay bitch

he didnt say I did he didnt dare say I did  but the look in his eyes spoke volumes  she cracked himsplit his lip with a beautiful right cross her father also taught her                                                                                                                             Fuck you

now fucked she wasnt playing any games with her health or sanity

she Kegeledstopped her flow

brought the stick up from between her legs

remaining thoughtful of drips she finished her pee 


Well there you have it  she said out loud  Thats confirmed two things for me  There is a God  and he hates me

she was knocked up  HCG revealed the + on the stick  Human Chorionic Gonadotropin  she hated that she knew that 
but her father did 

but not for long

shed make a doctor appointment

heads Mifepristone  tails Misoprostol

if she talked to her fatherknowing him hed lean Misoprostol

she didnt have to ask

hed lean to Misoprostol only because they liked miso soup when they had sushi and because he was a comedian  in the sense that if possible it was better to laugh than cry

he was right  she was fortunate to have options


miso had clinched it for him let him off a flight of stairs at a restaurant in Capitola  she told him he couldnt come down unless he could pronounce in Japanese a dinner item for each step

at the top of the stairs he was on a roll though he was keener for sushi and sashimi he related what they shared for dinner  hamachi kama  step  separate hiyashi wakames  step  maguro otoro me honmaguro you  two steps  samon  ikura  uni me  stepstep step  hotate you  step  he threw in ika and tako although they had decided long ago they wouldnt eat tako octopus  likely it was smarter than they  step and step
                                                                                         Ahoh

Last step old man whadaya got she was impressed  Im impressed  

Donbe  Its only because yare putting the screws to me

You do well under pressure

Only because I saw a menu anIve got a full belly 
                                                       Ah miso  Anjust for the fuck of it although it wasnt on the menu . . 
. . Sometimes ya gotta ask

I agree  Natto

OhJesus

Arent ya happy I didnt ask

YES

 

he leaned Misoprostol but suggest rather the Mifepristone because Planned Parenthood which he supported encouraged it    

1857,  Thursday,  11  3. 21
2309,  Saturday,  27  3. 21

27.3.21


pompously he pronounced cellar door  phonaesthetics yaknow  euphony  fingered as such by JRR Tolkien CS Lewis  also Edgar Allan Poe not EA Poe  perhaps because he was an American writer 
                                                                                    a supposition HA a suppository an insertion  Keep movinkeep movin stand around an theyll get you  anal-ysts  if he couldnt clarify who they were he wouldnt use the pronoun 
                            unlike others 


pompousness evaporated  hed use wha he scribbled first  basement door  

actually there were two basement doors at the top of the steps  one opened into the hallway upstairs  the other swung into the basement

they were hinged on the same side

there was a couplethree inches of dead spacedead air between them 

usually the door at the top of the basement steps remained open  that threshold was probably a metre deep he didnt know this so he thought to share it  a metre is defined currently as the length of the path traveled by light in a vacuum in a second  the dictionary told him so   will wonders never cease

that the threshold was deep stop the young and the elderly from falling headlong down the harsh wood steps

when he was a boy his father went down a flight of steps that were like 
                                                                          a broken collarbone concussion split scalp

he got down the steps to him first

he thought he was dead 
 
                                     Hey, boy. 
Hiya Dad  
I ain’t dead?
Dead men tell no tales
Stop, I’m the comedian in the family. 
Yes  though apparently pratfalls are your expertise  You can have them 
Fuck. Ouch.
              phonaesthetics  it was probably the only time he ever heard his father say Fuck 
I heard ya
Don’t repeat it. 
I wont
I mean it.
I know you do 
                Though aint a lot you can do about it now if I did  Eh
OUCH. I think the adrenaline is wearing thin.
Can you move
I think if I wanted to I could shit in my pants  hed heard his father use shit before  And you can also keep that in your hat, boy; best get your brother to help me up and your mother. If I have to suffer her tonguelashing Id rather do it while the adrenaline spigot is still spouting. 
I dig
You and your beatnik expressions, I should have taken away every book you brought into the house; that’s your mother’s fault.

 

he didnt know why there were two basement doors at the head of the stairs 

it wasnt his house

it was always nice to inhabit the places he found himself dreamed into  like a spook or ghost or godName of the Father the Son the Holy Ghost 
                       he could be a trio a trinity if he wished  he could be morehe was more 

sometimes he was troublingly more

this could be considered breaking and entering

hed done that in real life 

not in its criminal sense

in its justice sense 
                  in its Fuck with me an Ill fuck with you  notice the anal-ystsense  fuck with me an Ill 


he didnt apologise to his father for using fuck  although hearing it his fathers eyes tended to flutter or roll 
Its in the dictionary Dad

I should have taken away every book you brought into the house; that’s your mother’s fault.

0744,  Thursday,  25  3. 21
1456,  Saturday,  27  3. 21
Airto’s  Sedonia’s Circle  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dBk6qdsB_NY                    


      again       again
                             he was becoming ambivalent  it didnt matter whether the sentence was a cry in the dark or letters on the darkness asif expressed by a label marker on embossing tape  etched sharply distinctly

IF SOMEONE IS GUILTY OF SOMETHING THEY EASILY ACCUSE OTHERS OF IT


someone 
           who

guilty of something 
                      what  


the cry repeated 
                   echoed

the text went round and around asif on a stock market ticker tape display 


since the dream was his  invariably  the clues laid with him   asif he were some mystical detective 


the screen on the back of his eyeballs ran black black black black black anthennearlysimultaneously he heard and read the sentence

the voice wasnt his not hearing himself as he spoke or hearing himself recorded by a machine

it seemed feminine to him 
                            it wasnt spoken by his feminine side

the script was in capitalised block letters print  not cursive   asif a fortune from a Chinese cookie turned into a clam buried in muck and mud at the bottom of the sea 
                                                     alien
flat  unreflective  black

 

maybe who or what wasnt important 
                                      what was important was the criminals nature and their criminal intent  and maybe as blatant as the sentence sounded and appeared or appeared and sounded it seemed the former  that if his head was on a swivelhis eyes peeled he could recognise the personality preceding the crime and avoidgo wide around them
hints and traces are always present

if he was watching

so he didnt have to later mutter  Hindsight is 20/20 


he  everyone   had been through 2020 
                                           he was willing to let it go and watch it slowly disappear in his rearview mirror
  
early AM-ish,  Saturday,  27  3. 21 
1022,  Saturday,  27  3. 21 

26.3.21

 

It was slim pickins

The actor? Doctor Strangelove?

mumbles absentlydoesnt lift his head Pickins with an i at the end not an e WAIT  Why the hell am I talkin with you whya eavesdroppin interlop . . 
. . Awstop, you know why, that’s what we do, all of us; you know we’re here.

Yahyah yah  Though Id prefer if yawanna interject wanna enjoin me then make yourself know prior not skate in surreptitiously yahave no no-knock privileges

No-knock? Warrant? Like cops?

The Fourth Amendment baby 


Baby? Are you being kind to me now?

Sarcasm baby

You make things difficult.

Difficult 
          No me no you Thats the lens through which I view our relationship our relationship and my relationships with all my known and unknown chuckleheads crowdinground peeking through keyholes 

I am usually amicable to our interactions am I not

I hate it when you phrase it in that manner.

Am I not that disturbs you

It does.

Oh I wouldnt want to disturb you Unlike you Correct I am usually amicable to our interactions correct 
                                                                                                              Better

Yes. Thank you.

Mebbe you can remember that for future purposes

Maybe.

Work on it 


If I may, slim pickins?

You were there Whawas your take 
                                      I mean since you invited yourself inopened your mouth 
Really? 
Im talkin to ya aint I

Yes. Yes you are.


he set himself to thinking
                           when he did he was a little distractinghe had a bad habit  habits not accurate  he didnt do it on purpose he began thinking hard in his head and his eyes would cross 
                                                                             made him cover his mouth so he wouldnt see him grinning like a hyena aint another animal fashioned on the planet that didnt look more humoured than a hyena  even while pulled entrails out from a hopefullydead animal then a grim grin though grinnin nonetheless

his thinkin made his eyes hurt 
                                Whadaya think 
It was thin.

Yes

The before an after of the remark were dislocated not linear

Linear? You're talking about linear? Ain’t nothing linear about your thought process. Maybe if you thought more linear the remark wouldn’t be a puzzle now.

Puzzle  excellent analogy   Yare pretty smart for a chucklehead

Thank you, I think.

Quit thinking yare killin my eyesgivin me a headache

Huh?

Nevermind Never mind

Alright. What do you recall the voiceover saying?

Yaremember

I do, but I asked you first. I think that because I ask you first you should say, besides, you did say you wanted me to quit thinking.

Yare a funny guy

Pomegranate don’t fall far from the tree.

An I like that analogy too The abundance of seeds  Yare pretty sharp this morning

I had a good night’s sleep; unlike you.

Yes Thats true  Fitful

You ran the gamut last night, you woke up crying, you woke again laughing, I was happy for you that your sleep closed out, an hour and a half dreamlessness; we all put in, chipped in for you, just so you know, or as you say, you wouldn’t know unless I said, so I’m saying. We bought you oblivion. It was a little pricey, but we felt for you. 


Thats kind of you . . 
. . Everyone, it was everyone. As you say, all your known and unknown chuckleheads.

THANK YOU 
                        Ya think they heard me

You’re a nut, you know we’re around you all the time.

I do I was concerned for those in the back

Jesus. 
        You’re stalling. What did you hear? 


I heard “Christ! You’d think a thousand pound guy would excuse himself.” but the dislocation walking on the edge of a lonely dirt and sand road I could smell the ocean I didnt see it then the diner a booth at the back the small exhausted Asiatic woman sitting down in my lap takin five “You don’t mind, Joe?” No I dont mind Yaoughta hire some help 


That’s what I hear and saw; what we heard and saw.

 

Slim pickins

Slim pickins.

0744,  Thursday,  25  3. 21
1152,  Reggae Friday,  26  3. 21

25.3.21

 

Another dreimka? 

Dreimka

Yes.

AhYes
      They find me  I am apparently susceptible

Willing?

Yes Im willing too
                  Willing to partake in take on the fantasticimpossible You DO know what is said about impossiblewha I say about impossible

No, I don’t think I do.

Impossible
            Im possible

Clever.

No not really 
              Its right there Just need only look


dreimka
          it began with gay laughterher laughter laughing harder than in the prior evenings dreimka

he can hear her

he can hear herher laughter like the sun sparkling in early morning dew
                                                                           clingingshimmering to blades of grass striping tree leaves bushes  flower stalks and petals
                                               coming down on himbrightening his head like the top of the rise ahead

going uphill he saw crumbled patches where underlying rock spied on the sky many anthills he followed a line of intrepid foragers that led him to a small dead bird they were rendering it appeared to have crashed its wings extended its eyes hollowed out there was tall grass dirt deer paths colourful wildflowers

at the top of the hill he saw he was able to take in a 360degree panorama  open fields pastures shy furrows where rain ran downhill other hillocks crags bold spines of stone darkgreen shivering oaks distant blue mountains shaded purple faces graywhite sunstreaked cliffs somber cloud shadows mountains furthur away ridges like blades keen silveredwhite a lightblue sky at the horizon whose colour deepened between purewhite billowing clouds which appeared as soft as the folds of a woman

then he was startledjarred his visionat once veeredjumped  he found he lost his peripheral vision  he saw impossibly at once 360degrees
                 saw everythingat once  he was full  his skull a broken melon its seeds like compoundeyes  ogling  seedeyes seeing the grass at his feetthe sky aboveall around him like a turret of sense and sensations
he was enormous
                 he was buoyant brilliant dazzling a ceaselesslyconsuming fire
                                                                                     and washing over him her laughter
he could smell happy tears dappling her cheeks her fecundity he could smell her mixed with earth warmed rock freedom feathers breaths of beasts birds hummingbirds bees the respiration hiss of insects
                                                                                        washing over him her laughter 
his seedeyes swam to focus on her
                                   his wildwide vision eversprawling suddenly ceased and fell on hermagnified her on a gentle bed of young green grass small shoals white sand flowers fleshy leaves
                                                                                     she sprawled naked   his seedeyes scattered over her body they were furiouswere enticedwere incensed then in a spasm they rocketed off her body like flying fish tearing through the surf everything flung wide again 

he felt himself grin obscenely large
                                    felt himself treated  to this wonderment this impossible vision 
happilypossessing kaleidoscopic seedeyes

2107,  Twosday,  4  2. 92
1250,  Thursday,  25  3. 21

$547K -- American dead -- remember

a year ago the former president said “I think Easter Sunday, and you’ll have packed churches all over our country, I think it would be a beautiful time; and it’s just about the timeline that I think is right.” 
                                                                                          Easter last year the Trump virus claimed 20,000 American deaths

https://www.msnbc.com/all-in/watch/study-trump-likely-cost-the-u-s-400k-excess-covid-deaths-109107269611

https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/health/2020/04/11/coronavirus-white-house-cases-deaths-easter-preparations/5132802002/

2111 or 911,  Thursday,  25  3. 21

 

he sat inside the DMV
                      took him better than a halfhour to get in after it opened anthat chucked on top of the twentythree minutes he stood outside in line 

he rolled past on two prior occasions but the line wrapped around the building it wasnt movingwasnt going anywhere like a constrictor crushing the life out of its prey  slowly suffocating it before eating it head first
he had no idea where the DMVs head was


he sat inside head down reading a book

he glanced upeyes came up to a scent
                                      Where the hell she come from             

when he walked in he eyeballed the place  

hadnt a clue how he missed her

obviously she preceded him in

to his right at the counter an employee accepted her paperwork and motioned for her to step back 
                                                                                                        then they said Lose the mask.

took the words right out of his mouth 
                                     Wellsheeit off comes the mask her arched black eyes are heightened by high Hispanic cheekbones straight nose full lips painted red her head was the cherry atop a sundaeWOW                   
                                                                                                          then she quickly undid her folded ponytail let her jet black hair fall across her back down to the base of her spine she used both hands to shake it free then shook her head shaking her mane utterly naturally free
 
                                                                                              What a beauty
he liked when happenstance treated him well

though his happenstances usually did when it came to women

in the right place at the right time

who knew the DMV would ever be the right place

he thanked his lucky stars

they graced him again

 

the employee took her license photograph

itll never do her justice

if the DMV was wise and took a moment longer and created flattering shots most people wouldnt bitch the excruciatingly long wait 
          yadon like your image  yacan pay for another toss of the dice which might be as poor as the one yahave


Okay. Put your mask back on. 
                              NO Whambamthankyamaam so anticlimactic  wannabe climax strangled in its crib

she did shutdown the fireworks quickly bundled her hair up and confined it again kinda like closing a exquisite dangerous stiletto

she did what she was told

he had to get himself a woman like that

the DMV is publicspace

NOT IN PUBLIC

NOT ALLOWED

TRESPASSERS WILL BE VIOLATED he loved that sign he saw hung badly on a barbedwire fence in Montana  

if he didnt do all the things he did that he wasnt supposed to hed have lead a miserable life

the quality of ones life isnt doing what youre toldisnt falling in lineis understanding the difference between you and othersthe difference between right and wrong is standing up for what is right decrying it deploring defying it not lipservice  but getting in its face because the very first thing to understand about wrong is that itll never correct itself 

it has to be corrected 
                     all that shit ran subterranean through his brain as he watched the employee and goddess conclude their interaction

then she was gone 
                   gone as suddenly as she appeared    

he hmmedstroked his masked chin  returned to his book

he decided she was never there

a figment of his imagination 


he liked figs 
            sometimes they presentedrolled out of his imagination when boredom picked at him like a cat bound indoors picked with a claw at a screened window trying to work its way out        
0819,  Twosday,  23  3. 21
1157,  Day-between-Two-Ts,  24  3. 21
Siegel- Schwall Band  Shake for Me  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zH97-Ckmqtc