. . . megrims and tonnes

                        Whadafuck

hows it hes been reading since he was littlehis mother taught him  she was compelled needed to free herself from reading to him   babies needed tending

the Irish writer Ken Bruen dropped Word

if tonnes a metric ton had preceded megrims a flounder hed have conceded fishing  a trawler

                                                                                                   but megrims was written first depression low spirits migraines dizziness vertigo  tonnes following  wished he could remember the context but rather he had been utterly fascinated by the words

                                                       ansince their context had dissipated dissolved   he played

megrims grim

megrin

meguffaw

megiggle

   methinks

hethinks the one time he didnt listen methinks  he didnt listen to himself it lead to his greatest pleasures his greatest heartbreaks

this didntwasnt going as he hoped

                                  might have to feign cute

he wasnt  or nice

though accused

by women

            guys don call other guys cute  nice  or at least he hadnt or ever overheard

thatd be queer not gay queer

                                  queer  odd strange peculiar bizarre outre aberrant  ahyah freakish

arrived

freak

   also accused

what were they

                    his pleasures  heartbreaks    ?

No

      Wasnt going there

hed park the words freshscrubbed sparkling pretty as a picture at the curb an walkedoff  let he or she who may come by recall their own

                 and sigh

he sighed deeply remembering

   pluperfect   “used to describe finished actions that have been completed at a definite point in time in the past”  plusquamperfekt  GERMAN for pluperfect

more freshscrubbed parked words to be in awe of   

1245,  2sday,  19  3. 24

1140,  Sunday,  21  4. 24

Dylan  I’ll Be Your Baby Tonight  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c0FnoNC7KMQ

good thing he was rocking 420 when she remarked

                                                     turned him a bit  said he was off the market

replied pointedly  The MARKET

                                  then humouredtickled Who says market

I think yaoughta chose your words more carefully

You know what I’m saying.

shaking his head No I don

                               Im in a relationship

So you sa . .

. . I do

What kind of relationship is it if you havent seen each other in years?

A relationship

groaned gutturally

                   Well then, what you have to do is help me understand your relationship.

I have to

           Awfully presumptuous

I don’t think so.

No you woudnt

   Whaya have to understand is tha I don have to help you understand at all

punctuated it with a smile

afternoon,  Saturday,  420 ’24

1009,  Sunday,  21  4. 24

Savoy Brown  Made Up My Mind  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sxrMgfsiaSM

I’m Tired  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cxzzmBoNMMA

Careful

        Careful

walking to the grocerystore 

made him chuckle

an orange pedestrian diamondshaped warning sign mounted on a metal sawhorse

                                                                                           STEEL

                                                                                           PLATES

                                                                                           AHEAD

a head

          Please pleaseplease  Lemme round the corner an find someone standin there

    No  

       not a soul

GODDAMMIT

then looking aheadacross the street

                                           another orange warning sign  BUMP

Yah

      a steel plate in ones head would leave a bumphowever  had to say bump like Peter Sellers Inspector Clouseau would  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ebkY0u1-NKk

high Noon,  Reggaefriday,  19  4. 24

1216,  Saturday,  420 ‘24

Im no renegade Ive just never been afraid to speak my mind

   tryin to be menacing Saywha

Wha

       Whaya want me to say

Say  No   You go ahead

                            Speak your piece

laughed

          Wanna get your foot off the back of my neck

No Called leverage cunt  Thas Leverage

Thas not leverage  torture   Ill only tellya whaya wanna hear  pain can be a potent driver  

Yathink yaknow whaI  wannahear

Got a good idea

                     Yaint tha bright

he stepped firmer

hed been stepped on before

                              hed blackout before hed say whispered to himself Let go

      went black

cold

Fuck

       was he to revive him or supposed to let him recover on his own

he wasnt tha bright

1652,  Reggaefriday,  19  4. 24

1039,  Saturday,  420 ‘24

Rihanna & Eminem  Run This Town  (Renegade)  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NscJweAwGBM

 

   420 baby

              hail ’71 San Rafael Waldos

hail Lagunitas

in the day he was a head

                              Were you a hippie, Papa?

May have been thought to be but I identified with Groucho Marx refused to associate with any group thawoud have me as a member

I asked Mama.

Yah

She said you were a freak.

                             A freak, Papa?

Your mothers accurate

                        But then she married me Bit of a freak herself

   Jeez.

1000,  Saturday,  420 ‘24

Damian Jr. Gong Marley  Trouble  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jNNBJFaLEYA

the back was still acting up

                             he took umbragedenied body parts that tried to hamper him as not his

his would not fuck with him

   needed a hot early morning bath

                                      the back remained unbending

eventually itd bend

turnedup the tempthe hotwater  endured

                                           closed his eyes as the tub filled

when the water reached his throat he terminated the tap

                                                             it was HOT

then opening his eyes seeing he croakedlaughed gloriously

                                                                      he needed that humour

on the textured ceiling above him seeing by the dawns early light a shimmying black spot

by candlelight the night before

                                    it wasnt there

dusty bunny on speed

                        he didnt think so

   he thought Lets see where this goes

                                          it asif aware it was being watched probably was moved deliberately

it was twoinches in diameter

a healthy spider

                        HELLlo he whispered

it walked upsidedown on the ceiling eighteyeballing him on invisible spunskeins

                                                                                                                 

it bobbed directly above him

he muttered This had better not be a suicide

                                                 he remembered appleseed

three times she tried each time he plucked her up just before she would have gonedown the drain he left her to dry on facial tissues

she tookup spun a web in the corner above the sink diagonally from where his head was when he took a bath

bobbingbouncing along the ceiling it DROPPEDsuddenly  

                                                          fell inches

bungeed rather had a sense of humour

he didnt flinch

              imaginedconceded  this was the perfect time for a spider to fuck with him

cunts back was out on strike without reason

                                               at least without a specific reason one he was able to identify

although  he had been asleep

violated he snapped to

                        MOTHERFUCKER

the back dared Goahead punk Move  I dareya

                                                  Ill fuck you up three ways from Sunday

it had the upper hand

he submitted

   as he said bungeed

                          it reeled back up to the invisible strings bobbled its way towards the center of the ceiling

as he watched he saw a smaller black mark spider   angling towards it

however

             cautiously

he grewup in a white suburb

there were no black children

when he was a high school freshman a white family moved in that adopted a black boy

his name was George Washington he did not take his adoptive parents name

George was the only black kid he knew until he went to city college

it seemed to him then that if another black kid moved to the neighbourhood they and George would naturally gravitate to each other  become friends

senior year albeit briefly another black fella came to high school

there was no attraction no coming together

STUPID

          how many white kids didnt he gravitate towards

Georges picture is beside his in the yearbook

curiously

           he and George Washington were friends

they genuinely liked each other

as genuinely as these two spiders did not

                                            although  he sensed the smaller was male and perhaps feared being eaten by the larger female

he couldnt relate

they went their separate ways on the ceiling

they remained

                spun webs in opposite corners

his back paid them no mind

                              reserved its ire for him

0606,  Thursday,  18  4. 24

0842,  Reggaefriday,  19  4. 24

Scarlett Johannson

                            she gets under his skin

saw liked The Girl with the Pearl Earring  Johannes Vermeer

saw the painting at San Franciscos Legion of Honor

                                                       blew his mind the fortyfive minutes he spent with the canvas

mebbe obsessed  painted circa 1665

                                       made her twohunredeightynine years older than him

was pretty damn sure Ms Johannson got the role because she looked the Girl though it wasnt until he saw her character in Don Jon snapping gums talkin Bronx that he paid any REAL attention to her

   then she crushed him in Under the Skin 

                                                  fuck

been a fan sincenot a fanatic  her CGshit is tough to take

                                                            but a girls gotta pay her bills

Under the Skin was her ripe red cherry atop the sundae

                                                             but he had to eat it replace it with a freshnew cherry when he saw her Saturday Night Live performance as Alabama freshman senator Katie Britt giving the Republican rebuttal to President Bidens State of the Union address

                                               Christ

Wha the hell was the senator and her handlers thinkin  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cCfLpuLdF8Q

last night in the tub,  day-between-2-Ts,  17  4. 24

1229,  Thursday,  18  4. 24

Under the Skin  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J7bAZCOk0Sc

Don Jon  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2A63Ly0Pvpk 

dessert

Thursday night Farmers Market

walking past a barbecue joint he saw two coworkers seated at a window counter having a bite

he rapped on the glass waved

they motioned him in

   walkingup behind them two coeds who were sitting beside them stood to leave  they offered him a stool

Hey thanks kiddos

they giggled

              Buhbye. continued giggling heads together as they walked off

Kiddos? Charlie asked  Yakiddin’ me?

Comparatively  They aryah

Yes. They are.

Howbout dinner?  Have dinner, I’ll pick it up.

I appreciate it Tim though no thanks

                                       Catching my bus turning he checked the illuminated Dixie Beer clock in twenty minutes I got leftover Kapusta eyeballs queried pork ribs  sauerkraut  in the icebox

Icebox?

Yah

People still say icebox?

He just did, Tim.

I heard him, I’m just saying.

                                 Howbout a beer?

No thanks I woudnt want to rush it

                                       I saw yahs in the window thought to stop

outside someone rapped the glass it rattled in its wood casement

                                                                     Mary

hilarious Mary curly blonde Mary six feet tall   a build that took ones breath away

they laughedrapped back she had startled them  

Mary waved expansively

                           in tow were five galpals wordround the office was they were taking Mary out to celebrate her divorce decree from a really shitty guy

                                         he cheated on her

Mary was on fire ecstatic  glowed honeyvanilla  buttermilk

                                                               HEY boys!feast your eyes.

grasping her pullover blouse at her belly she yanked it up over the top of her unfettered breasts pressed them against the glass

Jeez they gasped

stepping back  the cool glass prickling her nipples  she cupped her left breast hefted it  circlelicked her nipple  talented tongue

JEEZ

dropping it she laughed crazily pulled her blouse down roughly

                                                                  Later boys!

she walked off the covey behind her stumbled after her laughing uproariously

   Charlie   Tim   said nothing

Donsee tha everyday Mighty pleased I stopped

                                                       Well gents not a damnthings gonna outdo tha Think Ill stroll over catch my bus  Tomorrow

next morning he walked passed Marys cubicle

                                                 she was obviously nursing a hangover

Hey kiddo Good night

A fine night, the girls treated me real well.

It  definitely was

I didn’t know you hungout with Tim and Charlie.

I don just happened by

I knew they were having a bite, wanted to give the old timers a thrill.

We were thrilled

You’re not an old timer.

Oh but I am

Not by my book.

Youre sweet

                 Can you look again in your book

My book?

Yah

      Got a free weekend night coming up

   This weekend.

Dinner If you like

                     Anif you havent a dropdead favourite when I eat out I enjoy Italian because I havent the skill to make it at home  Figure why dine out on something you can make at home

she sat up eyesclearing I make sensational Italian.

he looked quizzical If you say 

No.

     I crush Italian come over to my place.

   Your place

                   Ill tellya wha  ifyare cookin lets go shopping after work  Ill cover the groceries  wine

You don’t have to.

I invited you to dinner

I like cooking.

Awright awright  I appreciate tha thank you    Sounds like weve got a date

emphatically A date.

Excellent

Oh. And dessert.

                   You like dessert.

Maybe mebbe I can have what you had last night

her blush was savage

                        though outdone my her grin and dimples

midnight,  Thursday,  18  4. 24

0956,  Thursday

Damien Marley  Move!  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eiAIo0l1F9I

Stephen Marley  Let Her Dance  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SAjudNmHNwk

return to grim reality

                      hes AMAZED that Republican politicians continue to ask  Are you better off today than you were four years ago? https://www.cbsnews.com/live-updates/coronavirus-pandemic-covid-19-latest-news-2020-04-17/  

blows him away

                   whats the disconnect

how are they even holding office

as of 18March 2024  1,217,703 Americans have died from Trumpvirus hed suggest thats an underestimate  

as of this evening  1,219,487 deaths

59 deaths everyday for the past 30 days  

“ . . . Out in the street they call it murder”  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7-SCf7OAAYU

1913,  day-between-2-Ts,  17  4. 24

Damien Marley  Welcome to Jamrock

https://www.worldometers.info/coronavirus/country/us/

had to changingup rearrange his vernacular

when things stared him in the face he cant blink  can Not see

                                                                   onceseen cant unsee

maybe not changeup

                       an augmentation

bitchslap had to remain

couldnt toss it wholesale to the side  discarded

                                                    might need it again   someday

enter

       Brookeslapped

more pleasant than it sounds

it simmered a longwhile before brought to a suddendeserving Boil

                                                                       onceseen cant unsee

it struck him odd that pool parties he attended as he got older had nothing to do with the pool

he was invited

                 accepted

conversations alcohol  flowed

the majority of people wearing unwet swimsuit worked their way into the house

he swam

Brooke sunbathed

he had the pool to himselfwhich was dandy

he liked Brooke exactly where she was

                                          on a chaise lounge wearing a pink thong

her tannedfanny was built for a thong

                                         on the Seventh Day Gawd must have created it for her ass

Are you going to quit swimming, quit with the laps?

they only knew of each other through others met oncebriefly prior

Theres plenty of room if youd like to swim

   No. This isn’t a swimsuit.  I thought we’d get to know each other better, but how can we do that if you’re swimming.

Ill tellyawha Im not tired

                          Howbout this Ill proposeyou propose  a subject subjects an when I return havin given it some thought  well discuss

that was how then next halfhour fifty minutes progressed

she laughed

Im being serious

Go on. or That’s impossible. or You’re crazy!

                                              she had a delicious gay laugh deep dimples which he dug  the laps bought him time to conjure the ridiculous their chain was continuous  engaging

   Arya gonna come in

I’m . no . this isn’t a swimsuit . . we’re . . . we’re spending the night. he forgot she had a boyfriend I think I’ll go in.  I’d rather shower. 

Ill join you her head tipped birdlike

                                         Im spending the night too

Lemme take five fast laps

   absently Five.  she stood pickedup a diaphanous shell to cloak herself

                                                                  Five.  I’m counting.

coming out the shallow end she accurately tossed him a towel she took from the cabana

Thank you

Can’t have you dripping all over the house.

Straight shot inanup the stairs Brooke

You’ll drip.

I wont

        toweled off

Awright lead on right behind you There is a God

   she smiled coyly You won’t lead?

OhHellno

          he winked Id rather follow No matter yare a wonder from every angle

I’m a wonder?

I wonder

then silently likely each in their own headhe was in his they crossed the wide flagstone patio to eight steps up onto the deep porch

mesmerised he hot on her tail two steps shy of the deckshe stopped he banged into her almost knocked her over

Jesus kiddo taillights  Excuse me  Pullup short tap the brakes

she laughed playfully gloriously  Gotcha.

                                            he caught her dimplestheir reflection off the slidingglass doors  shed sipped mojitos to his beers poolside

inside they crossed the great room and went behind a vast sectional to the flight of carpeted steps leading upstairs crossing behind it she pulledup again

he walked into her again

                           she laughed before he got Taillights out

starting up she sped up the steps

                                    landing  the bathroom was directly across an eightfoot hallway that seconded as a gallery family photos interspersed with small objet d’art paintings

feeling like a kid he sped after her

threetwo steps shy of the hall she hit the brakes again

                                                          he cracked her on the ass

and because they were enclosed  ceiling and walls  the CRACK sounded louder than he had actually cracked her

she didnt OWspun to face him her smile remained laughter gurgled in her throat

You provoked me

backing into the bathroom she asked Shower?

                                                      You promised.

I said Id join you

                   Come in

   No.  You promised.

if he promised he promised

neverever went back on his word

   in the shower

                    An open relationship  No shit

2300ish,  Sunday,  14  4. 24

1247,  day-between-2-Ts,  17  4. 24