11.10.23


got him riled  again
                    Do you get it  When Im talking to you Im talking to you not some fucking spokeman for the World
YOU

I don’t know that. When you ask me something I’m taking into accou . .
. . Theres nothingno one other than you Im talking to
                                                       I am talking to youHere 
Imagine   Ive asked YOU a yes or no question  Imagine YES over a box beside it another box with NO over it   Check one of the boxes

It’s not that easythere’s a myriad things to take . .
. . It was a yes or no question  I purposefully deliberately posed it thaway
                                                                              Yare not a spokesman  Im asking you to answer for yourself  alone

How am I supposed to know that?

Whadafuck  Take it within the context I asked it
                                                    I didnt ask your opinion regarding a variety multiple possible repliesrejoinders  thadbe another thing I had not   Answer the fucking question

I don’t know . .
. . Your own mind
                    Jesus Christ


the argument had grown out of a discussion in which he posed it was possible doctors and knuckledraggers could share the same opinion

spokeman said  No. Not at all.
                                  And I resent you calling people knuckledraggers.

I didnt want to offend Neanderthals

What?

They were a product of their time doctors didnt practise onehunredthirtythousand to fortythousand years ago
                                                                                                                   Im saying today  intelligent people an ignorant people don know it all  One is honed the other is not and those honed focus excise   Whadahell  Common sense  Ive met an talked with intelligent people who blow me away me  they lack common sense an I can understand that  Their efforts to become doctors or what have you necessarily eliminates aspects which do not furthur or are untoward their profession  particular aspects   which they have deemed unnecessary

I disagree.

Awright
         Undergoin a surgery  Woud you rather you were cut with a sharp honed blade or a dull one


spokesman wouldnt say

1400ish,  2sday,  3  10. 23
1621,  day-between-2-Ts,  11  10. 23


againagain  early this morning   another of “his” dreamswandering a maze  a labyrinth                                                                                                                               unafraid  unperturbed
going from one construct to the next by hallway or staircase or room abutting room gardens again on an on many timesoddly  filled with milling strangers who he or they chose not to interact mostly solitary  anbecause he hadnt Ariadnes thread he found himself in places he recognised so moving forward he took a different tack

occasionally he felt lost  though only occasionally
                                                     it was familiar

he woke before either concluding it or emerging

sittingup he gently pulled his legs up an away from the cat who curled at his groin telling her to stayhed be back  used the bathroom returning to bed she stayed he slipped under the covershis legs again to either side of her he did not displace her warmth  

then closing his eyes he watched slippingpatchy inkiness move protozoalike lavalampish slavish to designs or loops he did not conceive
                  he watchedrefused to open his eyes for more than an hour before falling back to sleep the while thinkinghumouring himself his dream was a cocoon
one day hed emerge
                            humouring himself  perhaps his emergence would be his death

AMish,  day-between-2-Ts,  11  10. 23
1130,  day-between-2-Ts


compound  compound   compoundscompounded 
                                                    lighted gated dogged
hilltops not the starlit open quiet place it was
WHY
        politics
theyre still fond of the former
                               and former remains as repugnant to him as he was in ‘89 when he took out fullpage ads in the New York Times Daily News New York Post New York Newsday demanding BRING BACK THE DEATH PENALTY. BRING BACK OUR POLICE! in regards to the Central Park Five who later were exonerated

   actually earlier when his baleful face appeared in rags television newsclips that boasted him an entrepreneur  a playboy 
             somehow missing the daddys boy
he didnt cotton daddy boys


it has evolved now he has to contend with barking and a gleaming compound flooding his livingroom with light every eveningcasting his small houses shadow onto his sideyard and into the trees bordering it

ever driveby a highsecurity prison at night

bright as day

1751,  2sday,  10  10. 23
1000,  day-between-s-Ts,  11  10. 23

https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2019/06/19/what-trump-has-said-central-park-five/1501321001/

lampoons former  https://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-65197862

fraud  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OM9f2YAKIJg

10.10.23


some unfortunate thoughts that occurred when he heard of the attack on Israel

   ---  apartheid Israel

   ---  State sponsors of terror  Iran Russia the United States China India North Korea in no particularly order

   ---  “We recommend Hezbollah not come into this,” said Israeli military spokesman Richard Hecht to reporters. “I don’t think they will. If they do we are ready.”  

   ---  when we do not do the work for peace (1993s Two State Solution) we get war

   ---  Netanyahus illiberal undemocratic provocations 

   ---  dysfunctional U. S. House Republicans believe that Iranians will attempt to cross into the United States from the South Border (he didnt think Iranians looked like Mexicans or South Americans)

1228,  Sunday,  8  10. 23
1230,  2sday,  10  10. 23

ilira Inuit word which means the fear that accompanies awe
                                                                 he hasnt experienced it
kappia  also an Inuit word  means to fear or arouse the fear of physical injury
                                                                                    hasnt experienced that either
maybe he hasnt lived right


both he learned through Robert MacFarlane  his book Underland
                                                                      perhaps vicariously he could summons them
underground doesnt appeal to him
                                     hence
cremation
barbecue
Get it while its hot
                    hes eaten strange things
if he knew he probably wouldnt be put off

helps to think of human beings as animals
                                                would he want to be eaten

   if he didnt know he wouldnt be troubledKNOW
                                                      maybe ilira sets in stiffens his cock churns his bowels sets his heart pounding
CLANG CLANG CLANG goes the trolley
DING DING DING goes the dinner bell


fear hasnt held much sway in his life
                                       because he has realisedreadily acknowledged his entitlement
born white  male  in First World America

it hasnt wormed its way into his brain unlike others whove enjoyed it  their sex placated for millennia 
                                                                                                             why get a bug up your ass if it slips away

aint a damn thing forever

0900ish,  Sunday,  17  9. 23
1813,  2sday,  10  10. 23
Judy Garland  The Trolley Song  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p6O7g4XnTN8


   I chortled last night    he whispered on purpose

Chortled?  Don’t tell medon’t hear that too often . . . I do know it.



he humoured him so he waitedwatched his conflicted hardworking face
                                                                            an he didnt like to work that hard

I know I know it.

I know you do

   I just don’t now.
Awcomon
No I’m serious. 
                   I think I’m thinking too hardyou don’t hear people say chortled too often.

But you read

I haven’t read it either.
                             Chortled.      Hint?  Sexual?
Wha  Hell no

Don’t Hell no me, you’re not often far removed from sexual innuendo.
                                                                          that was true
Lewis Carroll  Through the Looking Glass

I’ve haven’t read it, you?

It an Alice Some parts of his poems  Youre getting off track

So it’s not sexual.

I didn’t mind one bit bein chortled last night

It is sexual.

Ill admit in lusty moments Ive chortled
                                               Laughters good for sex and the soul
Laughter.

Correct

What does Carroll have to do with anything?

He coined it Likely a blend of chuckle and snort
                                                   An Ive done them too during sex an making love

What made you chortle?

Dreamt of my daughters
                          Yellow summer day they came in from swimmingsunbathing I was snoozin on the couch We got high together  After a little whileafter disjointed speeches an tales the two ran off into the kitchen munchies ruckus ensuedsound comin out was pitched their voiceslaughter refrigerator door opened closed opened jars clanged muted Tupperware  closed againan oopstoohard push cabinets doors silverware drawer 
Utterly fantastic
                  The grrlsmy grrls were huungry
    
1121,  2sday,  10  10. 23
High Noonhurr,  2sday


at the airportdidnt matter where he looked backpacks galore not utilitarian militarykhaki but colourfuldesigner packs statements which unfortunately reminded him of big vanity pickup trucksGawdforbid anything approaching work neared it might scratch its pretty paint
                                         for another matter babies hanging off their parents in front in back he thought Wow some real connections real bonding  baggage babyYES their hands are free with his he had an arm and hand free baby against himbonded and when they got old enough they rode on his shouldersdrooled in his hair his hair grew thicker for babyspit

reminded him of when he was a kid

some kids had schoolbags
                            pussies  but maybe daddy had a briefcase
                                                                            pussy
he carried his books in one arm often switched alleviating the weightthe burn
however
         he also walked out of his wayin the opposite direction of where he lived to carry a girls books home for her
LET THE GAMES BEGIN
he gamed early
                 and when the little girls grewup teenagers  they remembered his kindness often returning it in soft sweet goodsmelling ways
they necked and petted

   then freed drivers license they caught fire in the backseat of the family stationwagon parked remotely under trees in a field near the airports chainlink security fence

1038,  day-between-2-Ts,  20  9. 23
1041,  2sday,  10  10. 23
Sam the Sham & the Pharaohs  Lil’ Red Riding Hood  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xNEYfIUDkh8
Bruce Springsteen  I’m on Fire  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iLtGTwIxZZs

9.10.23


she says  Shhh


my little Oriental girl says Shhh placespresses her fingers to my lips
                                                                                Whaelse did I expect
Coudave flipped that scene on its headhad My Way

You can do tha

I can
      But thawoud mean having to make a commitment     I wasnt in the mood

You were dreaming

Dreaming Think flippin a script is easyturnin camera obscura isnt breakin a sweat
                                                                                         Its work
Didnt work out for the three jamokes preceding heryoud think they coud smell the water was cold see it was turbid with matter mud sluggish mean
                             It wasnt inviting
Yet in sequence they hustled down the inclinenot pausing to strip and went in first footfall terrafirma just under the surface then  cutbank   fellaway chestdeep
                                                 I sucked in my breath with em breaths robbed of their voicewhose only exhibitHOWL showed on their faces

One after the other after the other
                                     Maroons

Disregarded me when I tried to STOPem heelem

Pawns in my dream

Didnt flip the scriptdidnt feel bad
                                     I helped them out of the water  Bank kept crumbling  I didnt say shoudave listened
They earned their misery

No one else to blame
                        Still  I felt bad

Whaof China girl

Oriental I coudnt affix Chinese

She crossed over the bridge to the same place where the three met you

She did

She wasnt inclined to go to the water

She was notwasnt the least bit interested
                                             She had texts in her hand she wanted to study
We went back over the bridge into town I asked her if she wanted to go to a café according to script she wanted to go to my place according to script she woud have studied not according to my script but I reconsidered
                                                                                                   I didnt want the commitment

She was beautiful

She was Is
              Still off somewhere in my psyche Maybe shell present in a different circumstance where commanding my commitment isnt her intention

  You coud make her

I coud

early AMish,  Monday – Indigenous People’s Day,  9  10. 23
1312,  Monday – Indigenous People’s Day

Every picture tells a story

Awright  Youre the storyteller   Tell

What are you talking about?

Text bout the knockout in a red dress you GAZED capital G capital A capital Z capital E capital D Yadidnt  You were at the restaurant celebrating Maggies birthday antha woud have been rude to her an the woman ya gazed

I GAZED. 
You did not
             You did your damnedest took itsybitsy peeks when you coud  Obsequiously  You have no idea  When Van Goghs exhibit hit LACMA Los Angeles County Museum of Art early 2000s thirtyforty canvases  I gazed on them tenfifteen minutes apiecealmost missed my return bus 
Thas gazing

Whered she sit

Where? What do you mean?

Obviously she captured your attention You aint one who has the capacity to admire briefly then stop Ill assume glances forth when you realeyesed R E A L E Y E S E D she was in the room proverbial kid in a candy shop  Though ya lack opacitythink  youre slickthink youre inobvious
                                                   Yah aint
Ive watched ya Its torturecant help yourself

   I GAZED.   All in capital letters.

he tipped his head doubtful  Fine Tell me the story

irritated What do you want me to say? 
You gazed
           A more fulsome abundant descriptionshe much be etched in your brain having gazed as hard as you did no detail missed or lost on you

She was a goddess in scarlet. . .  legs forever.

Legs forever when she walked in

Yes. Hot body too.

Doesnt sound gazed
                        Zip details 
What do you want from me?
The story youre giving me Cliff Notes which I woudnt read Im a detractor Assigned readings were skipped by ohsoclever students
                      You strike me as having been ohsoclever
You don’t know that.
Wha I know
               You cant tell a story
Where did she sit with her datefacing you back to you

Facing me, at the next table, behind Maggie.

No picture

What are you talking about?

You don go anywhere without your phone A birthday picture
                                                                 A clever boy coudave taken threefour five pics Maggie woudnt have been the wiser Share the best picture with her obviously trashing the otherstheyre inferior theyre the bombshell
Neverever a private dick

   Ever hear a pictures worth a thousand word

I have.

A thousand words can tell a story
                                      Which yare incapable of        Ya kill me

2200ish,  Sunday,  8  10.  23
1136,  Monday – Indigenous People’s Day,  9  10. 23
Rod Stewart  Every Picture Tells a Story  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GmyGa29zIqk


it occurred to him as he dreamed    
                                       that
numbers are that
                   numb-ers

anwhen theyre written as he wrote yesterday 1,178,171
                                                            that cipher does not communicate
onemillion onehundredseventyeightthousand onehundredseventyone
                                                                         the numb-er is shorthand
shorthand should not be used to communicate death

not when in all probability the loss of life from Trumpvirus could have been significantly reduced if it werent for the imbecilic former president
                           “. . . So, supposing we hit the body with a tremendous – whether it’s ultraviolet or just very powerful light – and I think you said that that hasn’t been checked, but you’re going to test it. And then I said, supposing you brought the light inside the body, which you can do either through the skin or in some other way, and I think you said you’re going to test that, too. It sounds interesting. And then I see the disinfectant, where it knocks it out in a minute. One minute. And is there a way we can do something like that, by injection inside or almost a cleaning. Because you see it gets in the lungs, and it does a tremendous number on the lungs. So it would be interesting to check that.”

   he checked this morning

one million onehundredseventyeightthousand fourhundredandfour Americans have died    

twohundredthirtythree deaths (233) since yesterday

early AM,  Monday,  9  10. 23
0942,  Monday

https://www.politico.com/news/2021/04/23/trump-bleach-one-year-484399  

the idiot  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PAauiLx3AvQ

8.10.23


   petite
          just a spit
blonde
        wouldnt usually attract his attention  not either
what did
           she lead with her chin

a slimpointy prow
                    a ship of selfperceived worthiness  haughty   selfcontained
he liked what he saw

hed bet no nonsense naughty

yah
     haughty rhymes with naughty
Excuse me

Yes.

   I coudnt help but notice . . .



she appreciated his notice

   he did too

1012,  day-between-2-Ts,  20  9. 23
1438,  Sunday,  8  10. 23

nine years ago  lighted from within marvelouslyoceanblue in the dark under a full Blood Moon  he killed a god fleshed as a deer

   He brought him here today
HERE
         Americans dead by Trumpvirus
he wasnt going to forget
                           he wouldnt
1,178,171  today
1,174,580  September11

     3,591 lives lost – families smashed  in 27 days 133 Americans each day

NO  he had no intentions of giving former a pass

1523,  Sunday,  8  10. 23

In Praise of Rump


he called his Dadhed appreciate it  
                                      Heya

Hiya! What are you up to this morning?

Callin you Had something to share

Something to share with your old man?

Dad youll never be old it aint in ya youre a perpetual boy

I don’t see a boy when I look in the mirror.

No  Hes inside
                 Look inside there he is

That’s kind of you.

Not really I like to think your boys informed my boy Im as old as I feel inside   Nine

his father laughed
                     Funny you should say. I'd say I feel like a teenager, able to get away with a lot more than if I were nine.

Ah Sounds like youve given it some thought

Not really, only since you’ve said.  I like the way you think.

Mirrored minds

I . . I . . . I’m not sure I know what that means.

Whaever yad like it to mean But thasnot why I called

Yes, no, you have something to share with me.

I do
     Rump roast

   Rump roast.
                 What’s that supposed to mean?

Im redefining it

And what’s that supposed to mean?

I was at the airport flying home from our visitIm a people-watcher Not so much these days as when we were younger when everyone dressed nice a banquet then now more like a bus depot in a notsogood part of town
I hear you, a far cry from the day.
Yes
      So Im in the airport fingerscrossed  AnmyOHmy  My prayers are answeredthought of you almost immediately My first thoughts naturally were reserved for her
Dad

Ya should have seen her caboose youdave fainted Im tellinya  A meaty round ass fittight inside a greenskirt wavy thick ivoryblonde hair a braid to the small of her back  like an arrow pointing to Valhalla   Heaven  Im in Heaven

Then I thought of youMyGawd  Wha a caboose 

Then just before I lost hercrowd got in the way  a last glimpse  right flank  meaty   MyGawd the meat

Hence rump roast

Follow

   I do.  I like it a lot.

Thought yawoud  Anyway  thas all I had to say well talk soon  I love ya Dad

I love you too son. Thanks for the call.

0921,  day-between-2-Ts,  20  9. 23
1106,  Sunday,  8  10. 23

7.10.23


STOPhe glaredhe said abruptly interrupting conversation   You stop

I’m not stopping for a squirrel, you straddle it let be what will be will be.

Speed limits 25 in residential areasThe Law
                                               This quasi-gated community you live in is no different
You can brake You can stop
It’s a squirre . .
. . Yare retired
               Where you have to be or else life will changeutterly as we know it
Ill answer FUCKINNOWHERE

I’m wasting tim . .
. . Whackin you woudnt be a waste of time

   You’re equating me with a squirrel?
Hmmhuh
          Earthling versus earthling  Yare no better

You truly believe that a squirrel and a human being are on par?

A slug an you 
                On par
Yare fuckin ridiculous

Yare okay killin an animal thaholds you up 30seconds in your ohsomeaningful uncompromising life
                                                                                                        Ooops  Entitled oops
Privileged

   When youre able to suck your cock Ill give you a second thought In the meantimeSTOP

3PM preferred, Reggaefriday, 6  10. 23
1837,  Saturday,  7  10. 23


to himself not a hafhour in Aaah shoudnt have come   Mistake

she came up behind himtouched his shoulder
                                               Having a good time?
he turned

seeing  Not having a good time.

I shoudntve let you talk me into comin My mistake

she smiled
           You surprised me when you agreed.

I wanted to see you again  Its been awhile

Aww, you miss me.  she teased

he hafsmiledshook his head I miss you on the dailyhowever you have things to do people to see  Have your approaches been successful

I’m networking.

Advertising

tippingtouching her brow to his Networking.

Sayin it softer doesnt change what it is I understand

You do?

Yes

I watched you go up to threefour groups around the pool.

I tried

May I?

Of course

What’s trying?

I introduced myself Learned their namesIll remember theirs  they wont remember mine . .
. . You don’t know tha . .
. . Care to bet
                Go up to the last group I spoke with on the other side of the hedge seated at the picnic table Say youve forgotten my name had seen me talkin with them coud they help you out save you a wee bit of embarrassment being unablejust now unable to bring it to mind

I’m not going to do that.

Yaoughta Id take you for some change

Really?

Definitely

Nevertheless.  she smileddisarmed him with her dimples she knew what she was doing  
                                                                                               What is trying?
After introducing myself one askedthey always do What do you do?
   Oh shit . .
              her smile broke in the slightiest dimples less deep too much went on in her face at once not to look like something other than it was four cars converging on an intersection at once  hesitating who has the right of way  wha was the right way  
Nice expression baby

she disregarded that 
                       So . . what did you say?
Did
     What are you reading
Yaknow 
         I don think anybody reads anymore
So I mentioned Jungs Red Book Ballards Crash Winslows Winter of Frankie Machine Katznelsons Fear Itself had to mention Graebers Wengrows The Dawn of Everything
I said A few Im currently reading

Still waters

I excused myself to freshen my drink
                                       Might think Im a souse as I downed my whiskey as I walked away Feel a bit naughty guzzling RedBreast

her smile broke out the life rafts Joe, Joe, Joe . .
. . Epizeuxis  tough act watching her smile return as her head had slowly began to shake
                                                                                               Don shake your head baby
Not important
I was humoured

Right. Doesn’t take you but just a little.

Yah I appreciate you bringing mesharing your network  Adore the hosts  RedBreast  Didnt see tha comin

I may have.

Seriously

Yes. They’re very generous.

I sought them immediately after the bartender said it was one of the whiskeys whiskys  poured me threefingers
I liked them
              They didnt ask wha I did
Gratefully

bout3 preferred,  Reggaefriday,  6  10. 23
1353,  Saturday,  7  10. 23