he didnt know himhe wanted to know him but circumstances didnt allow them to meet

and unmet now hell never know him

                                        because Alchemy died yesterday

he knew alchy was cherished

he knew alchy was anticipatedthat he made his girlfriends life happy every moment she spent at home with him after long arduous days of workworking with screwballs for screwballs contending with the fragile psyches of PhDs and doctors who believed their degrees entitled them to quasi-goddom

when she referred to those anonymous personalities devoid of any physical descriptions other than male or female he imagined old ruined spiderwebs that ought to be taken down out of ceilingcorners with a broom no respectable spider would fasten silk from their spinneret to one any more than a destitute person would seek wet cardboard to help fashion a refuge

alchy helped replenish her refill her heart and soul reopen her senses that she shuttered to withstand the awkward buffeting and direct assaults of mental health

They’re stealing my compassion.

They’re stealing my compassion. 

                                   when she told him that his blood iced in his veins her beauty had depth to the marrow of her bones she was kind she was considerate and to preserve herself recognising their assaults she entered a survival mode an armor which deflected the dull whips and slings and pointy arrows but despite it she still bruised still whirled images she was unfortunately privy to through her head 

she could not unsee what she saw 

unhear what she heard

she spared him

she laughed Poor alchy takes the brunt of my complaints he nibbles timothy hay fresh vegetables from my hand his muzzles tickles my palm and I feel my emotions and affections restored

What, what am I going to do now?

Any ideas?

Perhaps Survive  Thats what we dowho we are  

If I can help you need only ask

I have your back

she emailed him pictures of alchy the day she brought him home he looked like a miniature buffalo he automatically had his heart she wrote He’s my little buffalo. You’re my big buffalo. You’re not jealous, are you?

No

Were of the same herd same tribe

We both want your happiness

she was terribly unhappy 

he hadnt seen her yet but he knew her unhappiness would be evident in her facein her voice if someone cared to look and see

Time for a new pet! was the chorus at work

                                                  Assholes

happiness flows up in us through deep artesian wells

were responsible for our happiness

Time

A time will come her colours will return 

Time 

       desperately Time heals all wounds

1212 or 0012 & 1454,  Thursday,  7  2. 19

Free Wishing Well https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AdWz2fbiSno

Frankenstein America

EUREKA!

           he discovered what Frankenstein America has                                                               

Abby Normals brain Drumpf was put in it https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p9MKDWvtk6Q

1350,  Thursday,  7  2. 19

if you dont have a sense of history or a desire to know it or you werent alive when certain political drama unfolded  he could help

           he could help particularly in light of Drumpfs State of the Union Yah we should return to a written submission 

Deny Drumpf the attention he craves like a narcotic 

what he would remind you of was that the last president who said Read my lips  lost their re-election bid  and this president who implies read my lips and says Simply put, walls work and walls save lives  will lose his re-election bid

if he gets that far

Drumpf words and actions cannot be normalised he is not normal

he is abnormal

he is abhorrent

he is a stain

1116,  Thursday,  7  2. 19

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AdVSqSNHhVo

We’re going to build the wall, we have no choice, we have no choice https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cBW8mTHDgvk

https://www.businessinsider.com/state-of-the-union-trump-says-democrats-have-moral-duty-to-help-build-border-wall-2019-2

when you sell your soul to do what you did you dont get it back at the end of the stint

you dontyou cant walk away from it

youre tattooed for life

tattooed for what you did for moneywhat you did lacking the will to resist  or refuse

Now dontDONT  look around to blame someone 

You did it to yourself

U S M C  Once a Marine always a Marine 

                                            Once a pawn always a pawn he took no pleasure saying as much because his father and later his brother complied

he could rationalise it he could suppose they were needed for other men to tell them what to do that they wouldnt have done by themselves

That’s an order, soldier.

heady shit for sure

but he didnt take orders

he questioned authority 

                         he felt if more people hadhadnt kowtowed fearfully  en masse had mobilised against those big fucking mouths who love telling people what to do we might have escaped this lingering morass sprawled mess  the ravages of inequality

whitey should have had his ass handed to him long ago

instead well have to strap-inride-out the spasm and throes of his surly demise      

0807,  Twosday,  15  1. 19

1405,  Day-between-Two-Ts,  6  2. 19

he hadnt picked up a penhadnt written anything in three days

                                                                    three  long  days

and while to some may think thats not unusual chided What’s three days? they may also consider the lack normal

but he was a long way from normal   

writing was like rubbing sticks together to make fire

                                                       a pity if you couldnt

but a firemaker would think that

fire was in his genes he swung a fucking lightning rod a torch a boner of fantastic desire instinctually

precisely

a pity

          those who couldnt come to bat   

1812,  Monday,  4  2. 19

2324,  Twosday,  5  2. 19

Joy Division  New Dawn Fades  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IsT_PvMR4j4

even before Faker opens his mouth  his SOTU  will foment a national lingchi 

                                                                                 a death by a thousand cuts

1722,  Twosday,  5  2. 19

Fakers WALL  he wants to accuse Democrats of open borders  

a simple fact remains

                       what he wants is an erection that he can say is his  and put his name on it

1303, Twosday,  5  2. 19

The Who  You Better You Bet  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mj58IHA3urc shaddup Faker

to be an American oligarch you need to be shameless . . Senator Graham has fast become shameless  unhinged

usually reserved for Drumpf as when he defended a sniveling Kavanaugh

yesterdays audition 

                      If you don’t stand behind this president we’re not going to stand behind you . . . when it comes to the wall. This is the defining moment of his presidency (a sham). It’s not just about the wall, it’s about him . . . (this is where if I were fake I would stop take his quote out of context . . . but lets continue) 

                                                                                         . . . it’s about him (there was a significant pause) being treated different than any other president.

evidently Senator Graham believes the lying FAKE PRESIDENT isnt different from any other American president

blubbering like that he might rise like cream among the top-tiered wannabe American oligarchs

1155,  Twosday, 5  2. 19

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RTBxPPx62s4

https://www.foxcarolina.com/news/sen-lindsey-graham-speaks-in-greenville-ahead-of-sotu/video_6cb2d1f8-77d4-5745-bef1-1f618e2b9a3d.html

he didnt have any expectation when he might see her again

while he thought it in his headdidnt say it out loud he was surprised when he told her of course on the telephone he was mildly surprised it didnt catch in his throatcome out as a distressed chirp  a squeaky cricket

                                                                                                 as a matter of fact
her voice caught a choke a sob What did you say?what do you mean?

I said I have no expectation of seeing you

Why would you say that?

Please Are youno no  youre stretching credulity

Credulity?

Yes  Ill tell you what what word would you use to define how often we see each otherkeeping in mind that the last time we saw each other was last year early September

I wouldnt use credulity

You dont have to  Youre welcome to any word to describe that we havent seen each othershared a beer except twice since Sunday May Twentyseventh that was the first Sunday I had off from work after telling them I wasnt working Sundays anymore  Youll recall I took Sundays off so we could see each otherthat Id worked every weekend for better than a year and a half with them

I wasn't expecting this conversation.

See  As I havent any expectation of seeing you soon

1526,  Sunday,  27  1. 19

she smiled she waved

                        he had turned to herto the sound of her shoes racingbeating up the polyurethane track behind him he ran on cinder when he was young

Hi! she calledsmiling again waving again from behind the chainlinked fence obviously she picked up on his expressionhis surprise! his suddenadmiration youd have to be blind the track outfit she wore left little to the imagination and he couldnt help but appreciate her youthful fitness and how ridiculously it fit her long physique and fortunatelyformed face

he smiled noddedacknowledging her Hiya he said  he kept walkingturned his eyes back into his book

he didnt read it

                 he thought she was slender in all the right places accented in all the right places a high school girl  probably becoming awarerecognising her look her sexuality he recognised her expression hed seen it when he was in high school like paper burningsending off heat   whew 

she was Hispanic

he thought Hispanic girls Indian Latinas had a leg up biologicallyspeaking on their Caucasian contemporaries 

HAhe thought  cinnamon girls his panic

he shook his headHA laughing again to himself he didnt look back his book was Thin Air but riveting

1434,  Monday,  28  1. 19

1314,  Friday,  1  2. 19

clear and present danger redux

Caravans are coming! Caravans are coming! Caravans are coming!

somebody sit his ass down and share the story of Chicken Little with him because from where I sit the two look and act remarkably alike

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0wDNf7xMijA  Awright  whos being funny

 

1207,  Friday,  February First  egads  2019

https://www.msnbc.com/morning-joe/watch/joe-national-emergency-would-be-losing-end-game-1435795011911

Drumpf is a clear and present danger

Our FAKE PRESIDENT tweets  Are we living in Nazi Germany?

Well  Hitler didnt listen to his generals https://www.quora.com/Why-would-Hitler-not-listen-to-his-generals-even-though-that-was-what-they-were-best-at  an Faker doesnt listen to his nor to his hand-picked Intelligence chiefs

So we may be

Fakers a clear and present danger

2238,  Thursday,  31  1. 19

https://www.cnbc.com/2017/01/11/trump-melts-down-on-twitter-are-we-living-in-nazi-germany.html

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/trump-intelligence-testimony-totally-misquoted_us_5c53769ae4b0bdf0e7d97d98

They knocked him to the ground  before it used to be one guyone on one nowadays minimising risk several went after the onemobbed him afterwards they pounded their chests how toughhow bad they werethey are  Fucking cowards   

So they knocked this guy off his feet en masse and set on him with their shoes heels kicking stomping 

Youd have to be blind not to see that outmanned outgunned he desperately hoped someonehumanity might step upstep into the fray intercede on his behalf come to his aid  but he wasnt a damsel in distresswas he an hoping to minimise the beatingthe damage he assumed the fecal position

What? Fecal position? Fetal. Fetal. It’s the fetal position.

Fecal You ever been on the ground beat and stomped knuckled up cramped up protecting your guts and groinyour vitals your face  You try to make like a big turd and offensive so they stop
That said I havent 

When I lived in Miami I met a slender effeminate kid Richard his old man was military a pilot based at Homestead Richard was gayhe didnt bother me  he was sweet and thoughtful like a girl is sweet and thoughtful His old man hated that his son was queer an the muthafucker would get loaded anif Richard wasnt warycrossed his old man in the slightest a perceived affront his old man would knock him around

His old man knocked him around since he was a kid

Richard said It’s alright. I’m a disappointment, I get it.  I get it.

I said  Dont make excuses for your old man he should know better

He only hits me a couple of times, usually slaps me around then leaves the room, walks out disgusted.

Richards old man put him in the hospital with a terrible beating Broke a cheek broke his jaw

Richard tried to play it off Stupid He was stupid. He’s paying the bills, y’know?

You know how that sounds slurred through wire Aint much enunciation  

No I didnt know  He gets beat senseless and hes trying to play off his beatingevery beating his old man put him through Because his son not only wouldnt standup to himbut couldntnot physically His sons homosexuality belittled him

His sons homosexuality didnt have a fucking thing to do with him

I remember Richard looking me in the face thensuddenly he was horrified No. Please. Leave him alone, if he knows you’re defending me, you’ll only make it worse.

Richard  He aint ever gonna to know  

You think Im stupidI dont realise the blowback if he connects me with you

Richard started to cry  I didnt know who he was crying forI didnt ask

He aint gonna know

He’ll know he mewed

No You only think hell know Hes got you so mindfucked you think hes some kind of allknowing allseeing  God 

He aint an he aint gonna see this coming  He wont off it on you  

Ill be impersonal

You’re so cocksure you’ll beat him. What if he beats you senseless?

Thats a risk Im willing to take

You come away from fights learning something otherwise youre stupid pointing to his face I didnt fall off my tricycle or bicycle to get these scars

one on one in the parking lot outside the Checkmate Lounge on US One 

Ya got a big fuckin mouthyawanna step outside cocksucker he knew cocksucker would light him up

good fight
           it hung in the balance for a while then the old man threw wildthought hed land a haymaker telegraphed it left himself exposed uppercutseach hand an overhand left down on his beak nose splitpeeled open like a exotic tropical flower  blind old man blind  he had a heyday with him as he triedgroped for a clinch  The blind cant see  

I may have gone a bit long
                            but at least I knew I had

All said and done the old man was probably going to have doctor bills of his own

When he droppedhe curled

I wasnt gonna hit imstomp im while he was down  though the old man thought I might

The old man would

An seein him lying there
                         thats what gave rise to the fecal  position

He looked like a turd                           

0714,  Twosday,  29  1. 19
1402,  Thursday,  31  1. 19

Tricky  Excess  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u3ivr41yxGs

it was a refreshing back and forth  two vulnerable characters  a man and a woman  scripted lines from The Punisher he often accused his girlfriend of walking on his linesstealing them but they were likeminded and passionate and what occurred to one invariably occurred to the other

she asked they were having whiskeys in her kitchenshe left the bottle out on the table  Do you have someone?

If I did I wouldn’t be here.

That could be a line, but I believe you.

twenty words three lines on a page they could be sterile actors emote these words were like striking a match in a dark room  illuminating

                        they illuminated her suspicions  he was a strangershe didnt know him from Adam Sorry Adam its a old dependable line could she trust a stranger to be honest with her when her previous relationship went ass over teakettle leaving her a child a son her son
her son

why would she trust him

it was terrible to be outside their drauma

                                         viewers had an entire season of learning and understanding his characterhis honesty  If I did I wouldn’t be here. they could take him at his word but why believe her  shed only been warmed in the television box for ten parsed minutes 

                                    though frankly he had been distracted by the band that played at the bar Shooter Jennings he was terribly happy to learn that it wasnt a staged band  it was legit  Jennings was a real person

he also dug that the bands name appeared in plastic red capital letters on a lighted marque in the parking lot outside
reminding him of bars he frequented while traipsing Wisconsin backroads no-mans land if you werent a man or didnt have at least two sidekicks who didnt mind the threat of eating knuckle sandwiches 

he wasnt one to be pushed

Yeah, man, so why do you push it? his best friend his best friend who wasnt so good in a fight but fell in when he needed him  Why push it, Joe?

why push it

he didnt

actually it was academic it wasnt resignation defeatism or pessimism it was exactly innately who he was where he might make a bit of difference he wanted to try

Why not try outside a bar?

Because inside a bar aint nobody gonna whine that they got beat up You win or you lose No matter the outcome you end up licking your wounds

Its honest unlessofcourse theyre laying in wait for you

                                                          but he made sure they were fluidthat they moved place to place

theres no favourite place in no-mans land

If I did I wouldn’t be here.

why wasnt that the epitome of any relationship

if you didnt want what you have

                                 why have it 

                                            why not admit you dont want itcut ties move along

sorry ladies usually men are the cunts he busted more than one cunts nose in Wisconsin bars on the farcethe premise that he was from Illinois Chicago that he was trying to make time with Wisconsin women 

po babies  they think they own women

genetic test them

look for Neandertal markers

thats not fair he shouldnt demean Neandertals

assholes

cunts

they need to know their place

learn that their place is backwards

learn that their place is quickly shrinking

either they adapt or get beat senseless in a fair fight

2323 or 1123,  Twosday,  29  1. 19

1159,  Day-between-Two-Ts,  30  1. 19

Shooter Jennings  The Outsider  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OGIbz1O5o14

things didnt creep him out often 

                                but that rabbit loping down the hill did  zigzagging through the tall browned grass and weeds seemingly towards him as he walked below it on a graveled road  a road somehow given a name

not a quartermile long a hiccup  a dash on local maps  

hearing a queer sound first he stoppedturning left to see if he could see what he heard

                                                                                         and startled by its appearance he backpedaledscattering stones with his heels and crossed to the far side of the road large quarried stones laid there forming an irregular broken curb beyond them the hillside fell away steeper to a motley chainlinked fence that was probably erected by the community only after several people tumbled and flipped off the chalk cliff below

the rabbit continued its deliberate descent

sticks stuck out of its fur asif a rude bush grew from inside it out on the ends of the crooked tines grew small darkred husked fruit  they reminded him of anglerfishs lures

this rabbit perhaps wasnt a herbivore 

                                      perhaps it wasnt loping downhill just to get to the graded road for the least strenuous descent

it still had a good third of the hillside to negotiate before making the gravel where he stoodnot that he stood there any longer 

he walked down the road warily listening glancing back as the rabbit ceased its switchbacks to descend now on a long angle to an emergent point where the hill was cut away and the foundation of a retaining wall began in steps constructed taller and taller

                            it was there that the gravel road ceased and a groomed concrete easement began which provided access to business buildings loading docks and parking on either side of the road which ended abruptly emptying onto an artery that provided access west to the highway that bisected the town and east to the railroad

he could hear the blarethe commotion of traffic cars and trucks resonate off its slick surface  he could almost hear the rapid tick tick tick of the rabbits toenails on the pavement behind him the shake of its sticks the occasional drop and dizzyroll of husked fruit 

                        but he was nearly across the throughroad at the sidewalk on its other side when to his left he heard a car gun its engine and accelerate from inside it young men were hollering  he looked  they had seen the rabbit on the street behind him 

he turned in time to watch as the rabbit tried to retreatas the car veered  it struck the rabbitwent over top of it but in following the rabbits tack and retreat the driver didnt brake in time and rammed into the rear of a parked commercial van

the old sedan collapsed its body-on-frame and it accepted the bulk of the damage  like a large plastic carbonfibre aluminum airbag

as the kid backed the sedan off the ruin of the van he could see over its broken nose that the rabbit had dragged itself onto the apron of the ascending road it followed him down bleeding out 

                                                                        a suddengeyser steamed out from under the sedans hood its radiator rupturing and over its howl he heard cries from inside the car GO GO  GET OUT OF HERE  

the sedan lurchedlurched  and lurched in a hobbled reverse it bleeding out  GO! GO!

then he saw why they screamed off the hill came a swarm of sticktined rabbits the sedans last lurch was simultaneous to the mangled rabbits last gasp and spasmand as the kids emptied outthree doors flung widethey were taken down by rabbits rendered by rabbits their pieces dragged up the hill

what he thought was droplets from the mist of the ruptured radiator  were not

the maelstrom ensued 

                     a car trying to avoid ramming into the sedans rear kids rabbits crossed into oncoming traffic a head on collision then a daisychain of rearends in either direction speeding distracted drivers T-bones in the near intersection because the traffic light went green  

                                 and all of it provided grim cover for the rabbits escaping with their morsels  the smooth easement scribbled with blood like chalk on a blackboard which lead to many many paths in the gravel whose turned stones threw up the smoke of dust that cloaked and covered evidence hiding the rabbits retreat

he could have stayedhe could have been an eyewitness he didnt

the authorities could figure it out they made up shit all the time

hed let the drivers tell them what they saw he figured their stories to exonerate themselves would pale what he had seen

besides  

         as he walked awaylighting up another joint he figured his story would have been considered impaired

early hours,  Saturday,  26  1. 19

1356,  Twosday,  29  1. 19