thats fun
a misogynistic FAKE PRESIDENT has
his Supreme Court justice nominee vehemently deny his accuser Christine Blasey Ford
from the White House today
Oh to be a fly on the wall
1549, Monday,
17 9. 18
17.9.18
she said she was happy he was
dreaming again
mebbe not if she knew
what he was dreaming
some people are affected by their
dreamsthey flinch if theyre going to die awakesuddenly beating it out of
their dream as if it were an axemans blade they were pushed off a tall building
a gun held to their temple the hammer cocked all the sorted ways one could die or
feared dying drowning alone at sea asphyxiating crushed by a car a stampede
poisoned
by a loved one
he dreamed he died all the ways
he could die
he didnt wake up
he wanted to see
then
he dreamed all the dreams of all the ways and places he could fuck all the unknown women rarely ever seeing their
faces and if he did he rarely recognised them he
fucked strangers he dreamed homosexual dreams that disturbed
himthough he didnt wake and came as copiously as he came on womens faces
in their mouths between their tits stuffed inside their cunts carefully gently thrusting in their asses
his homosexual encounters however
were curiously parlayed by
his consciousness? he gavehe didnt take and the dreamed men like the dreamed women remained
faceless
while he lived in Miami he had an
affair with a woman Kristin who he stole from Thor one evening after an athletic fuck throughout
her apartment relaxing spent naked
sharing a bottle of wine she asked him if
he wouldnt mind drawing a picture a detailed picture of a naked woman for her
his ideally-proportioned woman her
ideal attributes
having drawn the picture it took him some time as he rarely sketched or
doodled sharing it with her she asked if
she might studied it
Of course he opened another
bottle of wine
setting the drawing aside she
took a deep sip of the cold Pouilly-Fuisse pushed him on his back swallowed the
wine and took his flaccid cock in her chilled mouthexquisite
aroused him again then she suddenly came off
himheld him in her hand Have a moment? he
gasped she said as she gently stroked his cock then without waiting for his answer she said that while he artfully configured the
womans bodyher posture hair he didnt defined
her face he didnt provided her an identity which suggested to her that he
was more interested in women for their bodies their physicalness than for their person who they were
laughingsuddenly out loud in her
face he didnt mean to
snub her obviously hurt her feelings she quit stroking his cock he grabbed her by
the wrist and brought her hand back to his cock A momentplease a moment for me to explain maybe she was trying to hurt his feeling
though shed have to go far deeper Please
she took his cock in her hand again her eyes shining she blinked back her tears
Thank you thank you for hearing
me out particularly considering my outburstI am sorryI apologise and thank you for keeping our
intimacy I couldnt possibly draw her face More resides in a womans face than just her
features Youll excuse the tepid though
terribly true assessment that a persons eyes are the portals of their soul the
coals of their intelligence the fire of their identity While her bodyher physical attributes attractiveness
is primary to meyoud be lying if my bodymy fortunately-formed face didnt
attract you at first sex would be
one-dimensional eventually boring and dissatisfying
if her mind wasnt the salt and pepperthe spice that could truly entice mehold my
fascination incite my fantasy
Kristen You are fascinating
she smiled she released his hard on she took a long sip at her wine and as she
set her glass down on the stone hearth at the fireplace he caught her by her
shoulder Swallow your wine he said My turn and taking a sip of wine he pushed her onto her
back and parted her legs
Kristen was fascinating and
imaginative
she served herself as dessert one
evening
her diningroom overlooked Key
Biscayne from ten stories up
when dinner was finished she took
up the dishes and entering the kitchen she asked him to sit tight she had something for dessert
they
rarely had dessert
returning to the diningroom briefly
she dimmed the lights
Did you need any help he asked
she laughed in reply No thank you, sit still.
she reentered the room naked save for a silk scarf at her throat its ends like
petals or languid tongues at her breasts
in her hands she carried had a large
oval sterlingsliver serving platter melon
and fruit were artfully arranged at its edges in its center was a silver bowl of whipped cream
she kissed him hungrily
as she leaned forward to set the
platter on the table before him her thigh at his thigh he stroked the
undersides of her breasts with his hands
she set the bowl of whipped cream
to a side and turned facing him she straddled
himkissed him again then she tossed
her headher ginger hair freeing itself from the loose knot she wore it in she set her hands at the tables edge one foot
on his thigh she lifted herself and sat Oooh
that’s cold on the platter her hips were garnished by the fruit spreading her legs she set the shallow lathered
bowl just under her quim smiled
wickedly If you prefer whipped
cream.
they had the fruit and whipped
cream later before the fireplace with crystal flutes of champagne they shared a couple bowls of hashish
he hadnt had a dessert to rival hers since
1628, Saturday,
15 9. 18
1120, Sunday,
16 9. 18
16.9.18
he was held inside a plexiglass
chamber prism a studioheld as a partsomehow of a contrived televised game show
that he watched played out on external monitors a characteramong others glowing
like phosphorescent spectres through the acrylic panels he recognised that some of the players were
mesmerised by the pulsating carnivallike lighting without the canned crazed Funhouse
audience laughter although nothing funny was
going on inside the structure
he was informed that he was one of two
finalists
wasnt he excited
No
he made for bad television
he later conceded to the remaining contestant when the prizes were revealed -- nothing he needed or wanted -- which was always a death knell maybe the producers thought they could tempt him
the other contestant a woman thought
he conceded to her of coarse because of a tryst under the dimmed lighting from
without that they had no control over it warmed the ascetic enclave with an amberhoney
seductive glowhe conceded to her sexual prowess she had fucked him out of contention
No
then she was troubled he deferred to her perhaps she didnt understanding there are two sides to every story
No
then she was troubled he deferred to her perhaps she didnt understanding there are two sides to every story
at the end of the days competition they could shower
the sensual lighting coloured him tan coloured her nearly black she began cocoa brown and smooth
he obliged Ladies first with a quick smile a lascivious wink a genuine wholesome leer
she was flattered
it was the first he was able to
flatter her
she asked if he wouldnt mind helping
her undo the buttons down the back of her dress
he almost smartalecked How did
you get them buttoned up perhaps
a now-dispatched competitor they were culled to two from six
that day but he thought better of it
because she was attractive tempting voluptuous itd really be nice to finally see some skin
he threw in a gimme unsnapped her bra she didnt flinch
she slipped the dress off her shoulders
let it fell he stepped back to admire the
clefts above her hipsher Venus dimples he
enjoyed the delicious flair of her hips off her narrow waisther darkly luminous
skin disappearing flawlessly into the waist of her delicatelyflowered panties
stepping out of her dress she
laughed a perfectly enticing laugh turned sideways a lazy arm across her breasts her skin softlyswelled
between her relaxed fingers It seems you
don’t lack initiative.
Shouldnt seem baby weve been
competing four days
I wasn’t counting, though I am
pleased how its willowed out.
I am too
Don’t hold your breath.
Excuse me
Don’t hold your breath. I think I
may luxuriate in the shower.
Thats fine just dont leave me cold
water You do therell be hell to pay
Hell to pay? A threat?
Yeah an Ill take it out of your
hide
walking away from himher head high
and forward she said something he
couldnt make out her words if they were words they sounded more like a growl a purr mixed in equal portions shaken not stirred
beyond
was the memory of round firm buttocks his teeth at her flesh long slick darkbrown
loins converging on a generous sliver that twitched and happily received his
devotions above her curly pubic hair a
round bellynot fat generous orbs large aureoles taut nipples that could take his eyes out ample
cleavage she clutched for him to fuck she wouldnt kiss him he didnt want
to kiss her he whispered in her ear she hmmhmmd he held her by the throat thrust his cock desisted thrust teased played
with her until she insisted and when she
came she flowed on his hips her cunt gripped himheld him like a bitch in heat locked up on him like a
dog
beast at a beast
a fond memory
beast at a beast
a fond memory
woke me this
morning, I finally recorded it at 1247 & texted @ 1355, Thursday,
13 9. 18
1551, Saturday, 15
9. 18
15.9.18
Come Away With Me
his brotherinlaw niece and nephew
slept on the wooden bedroom floor
a blanket under them a blanket over
them a pillow
SiriusXM played music through
Bluetooth on a Bose soundbar
they had selected and nonstop were playing
The Coffee House
his sister really liked the station
Hospice told them that hearing was the last sense to go
he had read or heard that himselfnot that he could remember
he had no idea what Hospice based it on
he had no idea what Hospice based it on
maybe they just read or heard what he did
common knowledge
unimpugned
he couldnt sleep any more than he could hang up with her when shed say I better go. I’m wasting your time.
No Youre not wasting my time I love talking with you If youre tired or if you need quiet okay You never waste my time I adore talking with you
then his brotherinlaw called and said she
was declining he
didnt believe it he hadnt slept well in weeks he quit
dreaming
now he was in Chicago Illinois in the bedroom where his niece and nephew had slept when they were babies
his sister was unconscious had been unconscious for seven hours when he
arrived
he held her handher fingershis thumb
inside of hers
she didnt hold his hand
he whispered to her
everything he said she had heard before they talked nearly once a week for yearsfive years he knew that because he moved into his new place five years ago after a fire turned him out of his apartment
it was after three in the morninga
digital clock on the nightstand informed him
he hated digital clocks
if a clock had arms kids didnt
know how to read the fuckin time
he was from California after one oclock there
a hushed voice came over Sirius
he wasnt interested in what
anonymous had to say
Aww
baby I love you so much
he whispered
Come away with me in the night played over the Bose
he caught his breath
silently he wept
I
cant baby I cant
0340, Thursday,
30 8. 18
1317, Thursday,
13 9. 18
Chicago Does Anybody Really Know What Time It
Is? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7uy0ldI_1HA
Norah Jones Come Away with Me https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DdrmaJtJj_8
Boards of Canada Dawn Chorus
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O63vBvgQfUU
14.9.18
he quietly recognised as he set
his book down on the flight table that the words he was reading he wasnt
comprehending
he flipped back page after page of
Walkaway until he recalled what he last remembered reading of the plot a zotta father using mercs to kidnap his
daughter and keeping her locked away in a safe room beneath their residence for
her protection
slipping a bookmarker between the
pages he closed the book and turned off the overhead reading lamp the cabin was dark people were sleeping or
trying to sleep his had been the only seat illuminated
he turned his head and look
passively out the small window where his coppery reflection tried to read over
his shoulder while the lamp was lit
he sat ahead of the wing so his view
of the darknessthe softly lighted beaded networks like critical neurons or planetary
galaxies twinkled 35,000 feet below was unimpeded sliding past like a slomo
film as he slid forward by the minute to Chicago Illinois
he always said Chicago Illinois and
almost always was asked why he just didnt say ChicagoEveryone knows where
Chicago is. I dont like abbreviations or
acronyms I like things to be recognised by their full names That’s a waste of time. I differ Thats respecting time an individual a place
their names Someone or many took the time
to consider what to name them I respect
that process usually an unintelligent Huh followed he hadnt been refuted or maybe they just didnt want to waste their
time
then the window faded to black
something flickered ghostly faintly reappeared soft unfocused motion
soundless
it had his rapt attention
he watched as the moving image sharpened blackandwhite and sharpening even more hues and colors presented still soundless then seeing he smiled then the images
blurredwere blurred by his tears his hand to his mouth muffling his grief
I didn’t want to buy your ticket,
Dad. I kept putting it off and putting it off. Because I knew, I’m telling you
I knew, I knew as soon as I bought your train ticket for Labor Day you weren’t
going to be able to use it. So I held
off.
Then I did.
Knowing you weren’t going to use
it.
I suppose in a way I got the ball
rolling.
maybe his daughter did
or maybe his
granddaughter did when she drew and coloured a birthday card for her Great Aunt in Chicago Illinois his daughter held it up for
him above a photograph of where his sister said she wanted her ashes scattered their similarities the whitewater at the left
the waterfall just offcenter right the stony mountain path leading to them at
the extreme right the birthday card
emulated the photograph his granddaughter had not seen physically had not seen
maybe
he didnt believe that No love the ballas you say Babes mine
yours have been rolling on the face and contours of the
intersecting planes we exist on You happen
to be extremely sensitive Im sure you
felt it But you didnt get the ball rolling
she didnt get the ball rolling
any more than the flatblack screen of the aircrafts window ran bits and pieces
of his memory of his sister
when he closed his eyes they played on the back of his eyelids
when he closed his eyes they played on the back of his eyelids
2123 and 2234, Day-between-Two-Ts, 29 8.
18
1143, Thursday,
13 9. 18
After all of it he said thickly he gulped he sighed I have one regret.
Awno regrets they aint worth the paper theyre written them on Let it go
I can’t.
I can’t.
Okay Okay Then Id tell ya to get it out an let it go Theyre worthless Hold onto them too
long an theyll turn to guilt Theres
nothing in any of this over all these years after all the things youve
doneafter all the care youve given selflessly thats worthwhile beating yourself up
Do you know what Im gonna say?
No I havent a clue
Really?
I havent a clue
I regret not telling you to come
sooner.
AwChrist You a seer a soothsayer No You had no idea No one had any idea Not even the professionals who GawdBlessEm
contend with death every day It went the
way it was meant to go Truly I bear you no ill will Please please
dont spin your wheelswaste your time dont
beat yourself up
It never occurred to me Shouldnt have occurred to
you
This is very painful Regret will inhibit what you ought to be feeling
an you should be feeling this to your very core Feel it Grieve Let nothinglet no one get in your way
You know I speak from experience
Its been a long hard painful week Week one To be followed by week two week three week four week five On an on
I hate to say it however the cliché is apt Time
heals all wounds
he didnt say anything
But understand healed nothing will stop those moments that come out of the blue an stricken
us Nothing should
Youll be married to Lorelle probably
longer than the years you have ahead of you
I wish if
I believed in wishes I wish I was married to Cece as
long
Be grateful for what you have what you have had than what you think you want Want is as perilous as regret
he didnt say anything
Did you hear me
Yes.
Okay Good Ill leave my phone on Call me
anytime Anif I hear from the kids that
you didnt therell be hell to pay Dig
Yes.
Dont cross me Im as passionate as my sister
1513, Saturday,
8 9. 18
13.9.18
12.9.18
the plane was pushed back from
the gate at Sea-Tac
he flew in from O’Hare the night
before
he was returning to normal
rather returning to what had been normal though itd never be again
normal was before
afterwards wasnt
I’m not going to see my sixtieth
birthday. You will, I’m not.
Please stop you dont know that
Know? No. I
don’t know. However
I suspectI feel I won’t. I’d bet money
on it.
Come on sweetheart you havent
celebrated your fiftyninth birthday ye . .
. . It’s a week off.
Yes In a week Im sayingyaknow wha Im sayin Take it a day at a time
he heard her smile break in the
telephone receiver the smack of her lips
was they curled it wasnt a sarcastic smile wry yes wry A day at a timehuh? Take it. I’ve been taking it a day at a time, living one day at a time since I
was fifty years old. Then it was breast cancer, the diagnosis, what a wonderful
belated birthday present, the gift that just keeps on giving.
And
taking.
I
remember
Fine. You remember. I’ve had to live with it, if you can call chemo a lifestyle. I’m living day by day, waking up every morning crossing my fingers hoping it’s just
been a bad dream, a
real bad dream.
she cleared her throat phlegm of sorrow desperation
My life is a bad dream.
he wouldnt argue with her he called her once a weekoccasionally moved off their mark by her cancer to the next he called to talk with
her listen to spend all the time he could
he listened to every word she said
he left it to her to change channelsget off subject shed ask what was
new she knew she could always count on him he was a fount of useless
interesting information
How do you know that? shed ask
Its not so much knowing baby as
reading itseeing it it catches my eye
makes me curious
You’re not curious she said once
you’re promiscuous.
Wha
I tell everyone you’re
promiscuousmy big brother is promiscuous. I get sympathy for your promiscuity,
like a huge triple-dip ice cream conesugar cone, sympathy for it atop the
sympathy I get for having had breast cancer; and now ovarian cancer. I let them
think what they will. People love to think the worst of other people. It makes
them feel better about themselves, don’t you think.
I think your chemos dementing
you When did this evil bent of yours come
on
she laughed heartily I show the women your picture. It’s not evil;
it’s entertaining. I got to get as many laughs as I can.
Even if it comes at my expense
They’ll never meet you. And when
they look at your picture they say well that explains why he’s promiscuous.
Some say they’d have sex with you. Then they catch themselvesare embarrassed; and then they say Is that okay with you? she laughed very hard I could be your pimp.
Youre hilarious Youve never admitted my promiscuity
Nope. No. Some fun, huh?
Some fun
Oh, trust me, it is fun!
he trusted her
she was also the last person in
the whole world he would deny
their last three conversations were
very hard
they had the sudden pleasantry of
hearing each others voice then she tried to catch breathfailed and failing burst into mournful tears
he was helpless
he was useless
he listened to her heartbreaking
sobs wished he could be therematerialise
out of thin air hold her stroke her head sssh
sssh kiss her temples sssh help quiet her assure
her he was there he had her sssh
sssh Take your time my beautiful girltake your
time Take what you need Im
here Im not going anywhere Not nowhere
I’m
sorry, honey, I’m sorryso sorry. I keep telling myself I’ve convinced myself I accept this
I understand I do understand
I
understand I’m not going to survive this cancer
My
mind, I’m all about the fight. But my body, physically, physically my body is
spent, it can’t take it. I haven't any reserves.
I’m
so very sorry.
Please sweetheart no sorrys for me Im with you
You’ve
always been with me.
Ill always be with you
she cleared her throat I’ll she stopped I’ll always be with you.
Always
Yes.
Yes I have no doubt
Me either.
I love you
I love you.
virtually their last words
when he got to Illinois she was unconscious he was very upset he couldnt talk
to her but leaving California he told those who asked he needed to see his sister
he
thought the Fates were real shits to hold him to his word
0815, Day-between-Two-Ts, 5 9.
18
0911, Twosday,
11 9. 18
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