Rose Never 

               theres a challenge   didnt know many Roseslotsa peaches no Nevers he tried hardearnestly to leave never out of his vocabulary

                             seemed no sooner than uttered it happens  an usually anticlimaxtic he made it a word 

the name occurred to him for an actor who appeared in a French film Raw written and directed by Julia Ducournau an extra it appealed to him so much he didnt view the credits to learn the womans real or stage name 

                                                                                                        he anticipated shed return in another filmhed recognise her  as he recognised George Chakiris anyone Bernardo  West Side Story only the original is worthwhile who was a one of four male dancers who accompanied Rosemary Clooneys solely performance at The Carousal on purpose  arousal is why people go The Carousal Club 

                                                                       yah  Rose Never etched in his brainhe anticipated seeing her again while her role wasnt prominent role scenes she appeared in attracted his eye 

                                                                                                     Rose Never

it wasunfortunately a name hed be unable to share 

                                                      didnt want to get into conversations of how he enthusiastically named a character but lacked the same to learn the womans real name

   he thoughtNO   believed  too many peopleassumed it their rightwere entitled because they hadnt been told NO in no uncertain terms in the past  too many got away with it because they pressed hard  and the other relented spilled their guts 

     they could go to Hell  an hed save them that by not opening the door he  thought he was going to say never wouldnt do that

brother he was excited for the next time he saw her 

2134,  Day-between-Two-Ts,  14  12. 22

1203,  Sunday,  18  12. 22

Raw trailer  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wKYFH0hRpD0

an review  https://www.rogerebert.com/reviews/raw-2017 

Rosemary Clooney  Love, You Didn’t Do Right By Me  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SpKRQWXYw5Q

jarred wokeinasudden to the noise of iron bolts thrown

                                                              not moving eyes wide he lookedround

no bars pale concreteblock walls 

his bedroom

               There there he mumbled quieting himselfyet  in the nextmoment wondered Prison 

                                                                                                       Is this a prison

0816,  Sunday,  18  12. 22

Nadja   Amnotic   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PaTnOpvpHsc 

seems all he has to do is fall asleep dreams jump his bonessnap em an cracking his nut insert their will 

                                                                                                             not a bad idea 

had to doff his cap

Whadasay hypnotic gin tonic

WOWyah right on 

                    Whartha come from

Your badgerin 

   Ya listen

quizzically they lookedround at each other This guy serious 

                                                                         Arya an idiot 

Its only a thing I do on the side . .

. . Side  No it aint 

                   Yaoughta listen to yourself cuz we aint got no choice 

he nodded  questioned pitifully Thabad

Not bad  Bit obsessiveyah

                            But arent obsessions meant to be exercised chasedbout around

   Suppose healthy ones

Playing with wordsseeking phonaesthetics  There are worse obsessionsyah 

                                                                                   It popped into our collective anwe were terribly anxious to share it with you so we dumped it into your dreams knowing no way a cold day in Hell it was going to escape you  All yours babe

   they almost made him cry  Thawas very kind 

Not at all Its kind of you to host us

Host Doesnt feel like hosting

Not in a parasitic sense

   Parasitic sense 

                    Thas edgy 

Aint hypnotic

   No  Edgy

We good

Hypnotic gin tonic

                   Take a bow

there were enough on hand that when they did the ambercoloured beeswax candle burning on the library table across from his desk sighed

early hours Saturday,  17 12. 22

2359,  Saturday

muttering inside his skull  dully echoing asif he walked down an abused alleyway batteredrusting 50gallondrums maudlincoloured graffiti on scaly brickwalls 

                                               Thawas takin a chance might have shit in his pants

wasnt a coin toss

had skin in the game

   he pushed anywaysFARTed  annothing more

                                                    whichfrankly he wasnt sure   

hence  chanced    reprieve

keen recognition

CHANCE includes neither 

                              grateful

Yah

    he stood in there  he wanted to take a victory lapbut  thadbe rubbing it in 

a buddy admitted as much not two weeks ago

he chanced it

it didnt work out

                  All the fuck I had to do was drop my draws turn aroundsquat.  No harm no foul.

living alone he couldnt walk away from it

Man  you didnt have to admit . .

. . Confession cleansesfrees the soul. 

Yah he snarled   Then shoudve had Confession clean you up 

   something maybeclever ran across his face   then was gone 

                                                                     Yeah.  I got nothing. 

he wondered secretly when hed quit tossin the dice  wasnt getting any younger

0916,  Saturday,  17  12. 22

1901,  Saturday

Jesus Christ Superstar  Everything’s Awright  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J30tQxAkvPY

he stumbled on his words 

                            . . . fat foods

meant fast foods 

                   then he realised he was dead onutterly accurate

fast food is fat food 

stuffs the gut 

not nutritious 

   fatty  tasty    placeboes 

                              versus actual nutrition  health 

a corporate bottom line is money not its consumer not humane consideration  unless one considers its shareholders humanhumane 

                 though greed affirmsconfirms humanity

Fat Foods not Fast Foods

he didnt stumble in the leastbit stepping off his wonky soapbox

1032,  Saturday,  17  12. 22

Stones  Paint It Black  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EBUFtoC2oj4

it was a curious pry bar hackingbreaking intocrumbling the fascade of his dreams 

                                                                                       they threw their hands upwere usually formidablerefused incursionsinterlopers  however watching from afar his dreaming-self scratched his noggin they were conceding  allowing accessbeing pliable he rarely saw them afford that they gave something consideration

               he tuned in  listened

wasnt one to eavesdrop

he heard a recurringechoing line

                                     stale pale pink stick of gum 

suddenlywoke

               wasnt dreaming no mo

a kid again

             TOPPS gum 

baseball trading cards

likely they knew they werent enticing or inducing him with the gum

                                                                        hed openunfold the wrapper break the gum into bits stuff them in his mouth pretend it was plugwhat was plug  pretend a spitting pitcher on the mound concentrating shaking his head no or nodding at handsignals from his catcher 

                                                  the gum dispatched hed suck in a breath as he turned to the thrill of discovering what five cards he purchased blind  he couldnt remember a time after collecting for a bit he again got five new cards  often one rare two he hadnt collected 

                                                       his baseball cards

he wondered when his mom threw them away

maybe it was around the same time she caught him with Playboys 

                                                                       loosely  1 Corinthians 13 verse 11 

I put away childish things when I became an ejaculating boy 

she ditched them 

he didnt know when but he didnt miss them 

                                                 at least not until now didnt know then that his mother didnt have his back 

   stale pale pink stick of gum  phonaesthetic 

                                                 Tolkien Watch your skinnyass Im comin for you

his dreaming-self humouring him

his dreamed-self blinkedfretted 

                                 Where did my flooded front yard go the sod green grown long swaying like seaweed under the glass of the surface white black-polkadotted pufferfish swelled like balloonswinked at him How long can you hold your breath, boy? fuckin puffers  hold his breath  they werent holding their breaths how stupid did they think he was  his mother only found an occasional Playboy  misdirection his treasure-trove remained safe out of harms way

stale pale pink stick of gum

   he  his twilight crew concurred

dreams were cool too

each and all on the same page

prior to 0700,  Reggaefriday,  16  12. 22

0636preferred to 1836,  Reggaefriday

Don touch me with those cold hands 

                                        his cock making demands

he reachedNO  I said don touch me

irritated  Whos running the show

I am don touch me  

                    Run some hot water over your handswash them  you know you don like cold hands anymore than I do

        there was that

it wasnt like he was going to masturbate

had to take a leak

might suppose he wasnt taking anothers feelings into account 

                                                                   was his cock another 

it winked at him 

                   Evidently he muttered

he ran the cold out of the hot water spigot into the turquoise tin pail beside the commode that he used for trash which hardly existed   it was only he 

hed take it outside later and water AWe a wisteria he raised from seeds his daughter shared with him from her plant he hoped in ten years itd flourishrun up the cedarplanked fence to a metal strut that helped standup the carport and spread a canopy on the roofs panels

   

2229,  Day-between-Two-Ts, 14  12. 22

1306,  Thursday,  15  12. 22

shivering is a form of exercise

                               why woudnt he emulate his ancestors who hadnt modern utilities  electricity gas plumbing heat   whose constitution was superior

his thermostats job was simple register the house temperature he was usually able to guess a game he played  entertainment  guessed temp within three degrees 

                                                    his fortune  he lived in temperate California  it didnt get too hot or too cold  call him Goldilocks 

a buddy didnt like to shiver 

                              You’ll turn the heat on for me, yeah?

I don turn it on for me  No 

                           Wear or bring layers not tha cold many things to him were matters of the mind Ifya don mind it don matter  he wouldve been an excellent Catholic if he stuck with it

It’s cold, man.

Quit whining  Let it penetrate youll find its not as cold as you think

he could see the look he was giving him on the other end of the line telegraphed what was coming thought he wasnt transparent  hed let him whine rather than say for him undercut him 

                                                                  You do you, I’ll do me.

Yes  asya say 

                Ifya come prepare to shiver

Think I’ll stay put.

Suit yourself 

   later he shivered a while  but it passed   

2329,  Thursday,  15  12. 22

1139,  Reggaefriday,  16  12. 22

        https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2022/12/14/abortion-pills-bans-dobbs-roe/

Jesus

        particlefetuses pill-aborted careeningswirling from private johns to wastewater plants  thereby creating toxic wastewater 

             he cleared his throatdeeply  Ohblow me

2253,  Thursday,  15  12. 22

threezeroonethreeonethree a number he saw 

                                                    sounded like something hed order at a Japanese restaurant

   Wha sushi woud that be he wondered to his date 

                                                         she didnt say

when he looked up she wasnt there

where did she go

their server approached him tentatively obviously not wanting to intruderush his order

Yes yes Good evening   Did you happen see my date

Date?

Yes the woman I came in with Tall auburn  statuesque

Sir. she said with extreme deference  Sir, you were seated by yourself. 

   By myself

Yes sir.

By myself

Yes.

   Yes it hadnt dawned on him Yes thank you May I have your split of your house Nigori please

Yes sir. 

         leaving she left without exhibiting her consternation distress

she left him with that 

entered alone had he entered alone

   had he 

             being alone didnt daunt him  if he had 

but he could still feel the warmth on his arm where she held himher scent in his nose  grapefruit 

he drank he dined 

                       he left 

he wondered when she had actually left him and why he didnt know

Yare being who you are  No one can change tha an youll not let anyone do so 

                                                                            cold comfort

walking to his car he looked over his shoulderaround for her 

                                                                 he still felt her

2206, Day-between-Two-Ts,  14  12. 22

1228,  Thursday,  15  12. 22

Autechre  Doctrine  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BgALMycz5Yc

                             https://variety.com/2022/digital/news/donald-trump-nft-trading-cards-1235462376/

grifter

digital

     not even a stale palepink stick reminiscent of a dog erections chewing gum included but ofcourse digital gum can be something in the future 3Dprinted  flavoured

Wha a delicious time to be alive  an not have to explain it to your children

2155,  Thursday,  15  12. 22

Who  The Real Me  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6y1c3xllo8c

he said  Mohs

heard himcoudnt help himself  Moanhs 

No no, that ain’t you aren't saying it right.  he enunciated  Mohs

   Moanhs

What the hellwhat’s with the long o . . Mohs, not what you say . moanhs.

Yagotit

   No, that’s not correct.  Mohs.

Moanhs

he glared  if it occurred to him he could take him he might have tried though hed be mistaken besides those days were long behind him  just adolescenthigh school memories  had no scars

on the other hand he had themhad fights 

                                           they grew up in wideapartseparate places nearly at the same time  he was four years younger  brashreckless years more than even he could say 

                                                                          Moanhs

Whatever.  saying so knew full well hed irritate him rather try irritate him than try to punch him in the mouth

sitting across the table from him he knewunderstood the game provocation would have to amount to more than that to get his goat all he did was jiggle tugpitifully at the hemp rope round his billygoat neck

                                                                                           Moanhs he was beginning to irritate himself which humouredmade him smile  Balls in your court

You have to make an issue out of this?

The enunciation 

   There’s more to it than that . . it’s because I don’t know your private little joke, you’re always riding on something I can’t see.

seemed simple to him 

                      asif under a printed sentence he wrote it cursively have to be blind not to see how the individual letters were spunadjoined  it was English

Mohs.

 

The scale for hardness in minerals.

   I know

          You know the Bristol Chart

he repeated it to himself 

                            No.  I can’t say I do.

Its on a scale of seven begins with hardest unlike Moanhs ten the diamond  Wanna guess

No.  I'd be walking into something.

Ohya know me so well Yave walked with it yare familiar 

                                                              Thas a hint 

I don’t want to play. I refuse to be the butt of your joke.

Yare so hot yare on fire  

I’m not playing.

One is hardest to seven virtually liquid  Where do you think you come down on average

   I’m not playing.

Do you want me to say or youll look it up on your phone if your remember

If I remember.

Ill say yare a six  On average   According to you

Are we done?

Oh he moanhs  Yare no fun

236 preferred,  Day-between-Two-Ts,  20  7. 22

1126,  Thursday,  15  12. 22

Mephistofeles  Master Doom  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xgu4ugBWq0Y 

Bristol   https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/bristol-stool-scale

hes not surprised were tethered to drugs 

                                          hed just watched two episodes of a movie on Hulu think of that commercial breaks  he thought on-line would be differenthadnt watched television since last century expressly for that reason  because his wife on an array of psychotropic drugs never turned the damn machine off these two minute interruptions he muted  in twothree of them four different drugs hed never seen or heard of before advertised for unidentified diseases they eased or treated

he might suppose other audience members knew the drugs because they suffered the diseases  but he wasnt sure

America has been runninghijacked on fear since September 11  Bushs neocon administration had its way with America churnedmainlined fear into its veins  seemed no one had memory  they jumpedHOW HIGH? because they were told

he heard but didnt listen 

drugs  prophylactics  placeboes  ameliorate fear 

                                                      overdose kills it

1945,  Day-between-Two-Ts,  14  12. 22

1036,  Thursday,  15  12. 22

Electric Wizard  Return Trip  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E3nsYke7o54 

Egg ooze blue lava 

                    I like where this was goin 

Wharsit goin

Wha tryin to be a naysayer 

   Nay

Smart ass 

Learnin from the best   

Ana smart ass who shines knobs too  oughtabe workin for some dandy Republican wastin your talents here

   Im bonded

Fiscally

No

    Bonded to you

Ah  I see holdin my feet to the fire

In a sense

Fair

      I was thinking I like where this is goin because theyd compete with cellar door

Man yareally got a hard on for tha

I do

     Tolkien was out of his mind Antha his phonaesthetic phanatics have allowed it to persistfester all these years frosts my fanny

Persists festers frosts your fanny

Like your alliteration

Thank you Actually yours Im learnin from the best

Not by a long shot

I woudnt knownow woud I  Yare all I got   Im a captive audience

Not necessarily captive You and yours found me like sifting powder sugar finds beignets chiacchiere bugie or strudel

Youah suggesting yare sweet

No Appealed to me visually an explanation

Funny guy

Ill remind you naysayer

Appleacorn whaever doesnt fall far from the tree

Ill take tha as a compliment

Now yatryin to shine my knob

Not on our lives

   Good Then neither of us will be working for the Republican party anytime soon

Nope Independent  Dog off leash urbanly speaking

Not urbanely

Thall be a cold day in Hell

Just makin sure Woud hate to have to flee to dust some other pastry  puff

   Puff Now yare gettin ridiculous

1234,  Day-between-Two-Ts,  14  12. 22

wakey wakey, fresh eggs and bakey

azure rolled him out of bed this moorning originally a misspellingbut he liked it  morning is a mooring a fresh tether on the day 

     the rollingroiling azure was pushed on by adz which informed his waking mind ad z add z azzure which was bitchslappedhard chick wouldve knocked his head off if he didnt cover up bring his elbows up keep his fists to either side of his jaw she could work his ribs  azzures zzs spun oneeighty sss azzure became assure

                                                                                                      his moorning assured 

dictates followed 

Make your bed

Clean the catboxes 

Wash your hands an face

Make coffee 

Feed the cats 

Feed the outside cats 

Decide dinner while washing their dishes 

   Wriote 

            whaever comes to mind 

cool blue

cerulean 

Herculean

         not necessarilynot when things run like out of him like he was a broken egg ooze

blue lava 

islandforming

I land formed

Id

Ego 

      Moored

1120,  Day-between-Two-Ts,  14  12. 22

Nadja  Thaumogensis  inadvertently create a being as a by product of casting a spell  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lt2PApYd5p8 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ig3GaDGPVj4

theres cunts  then theres pieces of shit 

                                        then   then theres shitspatter on the porcelain that he called shitKacsmaryked

forgivehim it is a mouthfulYET utterly appropriate describing the judge and his misfortunate mind 

                                                                                                       seeking to deny among other things birth control in the 21st Century verges on ifnot warped intellectual processes  but a mind and sober consideration bereft of humanity  say  Judge Aileen Cannons soulmate   let him guess shitKacsmaryk has lifetime tenure HE DOES  frankly it wasnt a guess

Kacsmaryk is party to The Federalist Society clown car complete with red polkadot unrolling party horns and hysterically braying Heehaw Heehaw Hehaw                              

1700,  Twosday,  13  12. 22

1101,  Day-between-Two-Ts,  14  12. 22

https://www.vox.com/policy-and-politics/2022/12/13/23505459/supreme-court-birth-control-contraception-constitution-matthew-kacsmaryk-deanda-becerra 

https://civilrights.org/resource/oppose-confirmation-matthew-kacsmaryk-u-s-district-court-northern-district-texas/ 

https://www.whitehouse.senate.gov/news/speeches/the-third-federalist-society