Service Model  Adrian Tchaikovsky

                                          credit where credits duehowever

he was certain the sentence wasnt meant a sentence for comedians

                                                                          maybe bad ones

wheres the old Vaudevillian hook dragem kickin an screamin offstage

wasnt going to hold his breath

 

Tchaikovsky

               It had a plain humanoid chassis, grey plastic and a blank face, not even the suggestion of features. Whatever adornments it had once worn, whatever distinctive look it had carried into children’s parties or comedy routines, only the bare name was left.

grey  plastic  comedians

                             wouldnt wish that on his worst enemyhadnt any  beauty of hermitic ascetic living

neither communicable

he liked dark comedians

                            jokes told heard  groaned firstlaughed maybe the laugh drowns out the groan

Carlin  Hicks   Marc Maron

 

    religion would do well to suffer some comedy

great venues

acousticallyfashioned

broad pulpits

occasional runways

                      made mingling with the masses easier

some had moats

                   runways actually drawbridges

the congregants faithful  trusting

                                     fail to eyeball their confineswhy he didnt like church

every one he had a legitimate reason to attend had him sit his back  to the door

                                                                                       hed stand on the aisle

one or another Station of the Cross glaring down over his shoulder

he wouldnt sit in any establishment with his back to the door

long longago he determined since he has no choice but to go he wanted to see death coming

                                                                                                   no sneaky World War II Jap shit

                        hed no sooner fall for someone looking past him over his shoulder What the hell is that? an turn to look than if someone approached him with a subpoena called him by his name

   glances  a stranger

acts like he didnt hear

they blew their cover

he waltzes on by

                   hes John Doe

he has to face the door

    stupid doesnt

2234,  Thursday,  21  8. 25

1534,  reggaefriday,  22  8. 25

I cant keep track of time

hed written 2202 on the prior pagehad a thought

thought seemed lingering

went to write I cant keep track of time and time-noting as he did it was 2206

                                                                                  felt a mightylong four minutes

mariachi flushed like bats at dusk 

                                    Ya know why

I don

We witnessed it up close

                             Your brain informed your body you havent long to live so it gathered your senses an not only did they conspire to slow time

people observing   Would you look at him. He looks like he’s moving in slow motion.

                                                        They actually won  Prevailed

They slowed time for you

    Im the beneficiary of Lucretius De Rerum Natura First Century BCE   Nature is chaos

                                                                                                 A chaos of inexplicable and contradictory phaenomena

Riot restored  Tranquillised   Composed

Adam Smith wrote

                      . . . while we have been endeavouring to represent all philosophical systems as mere inventions of the imagination, to connect together the otherwise disjointed and discordant phaenomena of nature, have insensibly been drawn in, to make use of language expressing the connecting principles of this one, as if they were the real chains which Nature makes use of to bind together her several operations.

    an assault on the objectivity of science

 

was Smith sincere in his provocation

he thoughtchuckled louder than usual

point of contention

worked for him

he was dying

    hes been dying since birth

no sweat

Thursday,  21  8. 25

1137,  reggaefriday,  22  8. 25

eyes slipping  doing what they want

                                       Hey man   See  anew

Donbe a pill

A pill  Annoying

                     Youre really mine

Yah

       Come now  seal the deal

Fetishist looked funnyhuh Silent Catastrophes   Catastrophes looked funny too   Wha did you see

they were lookin mighty superior

    Awright  Ill admit it

                             Fetishlust  Castrate trophies

Fetish   Again

I blinked to clear  youse

                           Fetishflushed occurred

Castrate trophies really threw ya

Ja

     I thought Idve seen tha on my own without youse going rogue off the reservation

   Reservation   Insensitive

OhferChristssake

                       Bored

Nah nah

             Our condolences

We thought with the deaths of two people dear to you you might  lose sight   of whaya usually command rule lord over

    A wellness check

Wellness

Yah

Thank you

              I appreciate your concern  consideration

Eventually I woud have

Weve no doubt absolutely no doubt

                                         Might say we missed you

2136,  Thursday,  21  8. 25

1033,  reggaefriday,  22  8. 25

Heart  Crazy On You  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EZ7inhwScSQ

have to like Freud quite the Jew though he was partial to Jung  . . . it is natural “a certain degree of fetishism is

[. . .] habitually present in normal life, especially in those stages of it in which the normal sexual aim seems unattainable, or its fulfilment prevented.”

accordingly W G Sebald the fetishistic tendency only becomes pathological when the fulfilment of the sexual goal proves, by comparison with the previously imagined bliss, to be a bitter disappointment.

slipped into fetishism before he had coffee  it was still percolating

                                                                         Freud & Sebald reiterating what he believed common sense

Are you kiddin’? Common sense?  What you believe common sense isn’t held by the majority of people.

Comon Yaneed to quit speakin for everyone an speak only only   Im beating this drum all the time speak only for yourself

                    My concept defies yours  Whas true

I didn’t say that.

Then wha do you say

                         Ill quote Sebald again  . . . fulfilment of the sexual goal proves, by comparison with the previously imagined bliss, to be a bitter disappointment.

The epitome of common sense

                                  The actual sex act pales in comparison to imagined gymnastic sex

Yea or Nay

One or the other

    Are you trying to say that imagined sex is better than actual sex?

I didnt say tha

                  Comparatively   A bitter disappointment

Cant have the classic orgy  you – me – me an me – you – you

                                                                 I cant have sex with my girlfriend doubledup

Or she with mes

Probably kill us if we coud

Yasee  understand   the disappointment

 

I don’t know why I bother talking to you. You’re ridiculous.

If you didnt thered be no ridiculousness in your life

                                                        Youd be buried with your inside-the-box life

Or cremated  Distilled  Blendered  Mycelium bag hypae-denatured

Whaevers your bit

    Ya truly don believe if not bitter   a disappointment nonetheless

I can’t say. I haven’t thought about it.

Howbout this

               Next time youre masturbatingimagining some unattainable gal  Think

Tellya wha

  

Sydney Sweeney

2132,  Thursday,  21  8. 25

0948,  reggaefriday,  22  8. 25

Stones  Angry  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_mEC54eTuGw

Ja Ja  once upon a time yacoud call a woman a homosexual   Not no more

                                                                                 Shes a lesbian

Unless pronouns she prefers to be called something else

a scent of disdain Lesbian. She’s just trying to be more like a man.

point of contention

Karl Krause

                The bleakest prospect for a fetishist is having to do with the whole woman.

point of contention

W G Sebald

                . . . afford(s) an insight into the pathological reciprocity of love and coldness [Liebe und Lieblosigkeit – lovelessness] which appears to constitute the holy state of matrimony.

point of contention

            . . . laying bare the impossibility of a continual renewal of intimacy, presents, by contrast with  the earlier ideal, a truly appalling degree of estrangement.

point of contention

he thought about it

                     he had buddies whose girlfriends chewed gum

same girlfriends the twoanhaf years their relationships lasted  he left  yet during that time not one of his girlfriends chewed gum

if they needed to chew on something he gave it to them

point of contention

he thought

             the only thing uglier regarding human anatomy than a penis  is a scrotum

 

1900,  Thursday,  21  8. 25

0835,  reggaefriday,  22  8. 25

muttered Project to himself  shook his head like an old lion

                                                                was contending with the death of Ken Bruen  his favourite author

death of his barber Milo who he had seen not a month earlier  he was struggling  cancer   struggled four years

his little sister went ten

though she was much younger

                                       Project  The fuck I hope I wasnt

though he had his suspicions

 

he was invited to a gathering for an acquaintances birthday

the acquaintance invited him

                               Seven this Wednesday Black Sheep biergarten Havin’ brats, fixings, potato salad, simple.

I’d like to have you there.

Wha do you drink

No gifts.

            It’s a few guys, you’re familiar with more than a couple.

spot on

bakers dozen

intimate

          should that term fit apply to guys

 

inside a couple hours it willowed down to five

                                                      Gents

heads up eyes glancedround

I have a question

curiosities were piqued

    Has anyone tried to make a project of you or you of someone

                                                                       Askin  I warned my wife not to

I wasnt bendy

Think she tried anyways

I had to have been her biggest frustration

Kiddo  I told her when we started dating

                                              Whaya see is whaya get

he knew that two who remained there remarriedknew they had said  they were going to try and help their wives come along  trim up  get fit

asif in church in unison they said  Project?

No, no, I wouldn’t say so.

Me neither.

Not at all.

Project.  I doubt it, it wouldn’t have gone over well for either of us.

I’m sure I don’t know what you mean.

                                                  though looked like he had his fingers crossed behind his back

Me neither Not at all lied

was a shitty game  Texas Holdem

                                        they knew his hand  he showed it

chuckled to himself

                    Listen man  thas why their acquaintances  Dinner  Beer  Tasty

Cost you zip part of an evening

You finished ahead

                   Thanks guys  I was curious is all

after 439preferred,  Sunday,  17  8. 25

1612,  Thursday,  21  8. 25

   sighed  This conversation is getting a little strange.

Arent they all

she shrugged

                    Stranger?

I don think so   stroked his moustache beard

                                                    Weve had stranger

Im think how I parlayed it is throwinya off

People usually presumecorrect me if Im wrong  presume opportunity to be a good thing

    Not to be suffered

Suffer the opportunities

Regrets

 

 

Have I regrets?

From opportunities youve suffered

                                     Entitlements you enjoyed growingup mine pale in comparison Im curious hence I asked

Are yo . .

. . Ducked bullets

                        Knowingly

Or regret

 

You usually say.

                   When you ask me questions you usually say first.

Ja

    No

No regrets?

Ive given it thought  Only one nears itbut didnt seal the deal

                                                                        Going to college

You thought you may have regretted going to college?

Thought

                Then decided nah

I cant say I regret anything

                                Once out the door up the road don check the rearview mirror

You

Opportunities suffered

 

she shrugged again

                         Such a queer way of putting it.

Yeah.

           But maybe because . . . . I’m . a woman?

 

 

 

What do you think?

Im not

            Thas why I asked

439preferred,  Sunday,  17  8. 25

1144,  Thursday,  21  8. 25

. . . so  we can agree

buddy shrugged

Whas tha mean

                   Open your mouth an say

I don’t know.

You disagree theyre spectral

    I said I don’t know.

From out your mouth  Sativa an upper Indica downer Hybrid in between

No.  I think not. I think along the lines of them being situational.

                                                                     Getting what you want for the moment.

Situational   For the moment

                                      Gimme a break

Theres a spectrum yes or no

                                  Thas wha Im getting at

I don’t know.

smiled slyly  But  you have an opinion

                                                 You have opinions even when you don know wha youre talking about

Careful.

Warning me

                 Arya nuts

Weve had tha discussion

Handed you your ass 

Whereof thereof

What’s your point?

Types are spectral

                     Id suggest full-spectrum the strongestwhaever end of the line you wanna place it

Left or right

Dancing Middling  Isolates

Other end are distillates  Focused effect though lacking the complexity the entourage effect of full-spectrum

 

    Can we agree

You’re throwing an awful lot of terms at me, I . .

. . You like how they taste rather than wha they do or are

I like what they do.

closed his eyes

                    You like  lemme count the ways

Clementine key lime kiwi black cherry white grapefruit melon peach watermelon green apple blue raspberry peach mango tangerine pomegranate

                                         Chocolate

opened his eyes

                   Me

    You?

Pineapple habanero

Yes. You. Little too warm for me.

Youve said  Bottomline

Bottomline?

Taste  Not inciting a particular mood

 

I could probably agree with that.

                                          Are you being critical of me?

Hellno I woudnt be getting high if it werent for you

                                                          Dondoubt for a single moment I don appreciate your generosity

 

421preferred,  Sunday,  17  8. 25

1050,  Thursday,  21  8. 25

https://www.exploresherpa.com/blogs/our-blog/full-spectrum-vs-isolate-edibles-which-one-is-better

https://food52.com/story/27111-best-cannabis-edibles

Don Rogall  Pulp Jazz – Doom Noir  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Z1MCZd3aLg

Yeah. You know.  EDP.

he didnt know

they were talking on the phone twothousand miles apart

                                                              EDP  Wha am I supposed to make of tha

You know.

I don

       Ill assume its an acronym used liberally in the Midwest

Ive no ideanot a clue

Obviously it occurred to you within the context of what we were talking about

Yeah. You said demented.

I said dementia

                  The illness  unfortunate disability

Whas EDP

Jeez man.  It's an emotionally disturbed person.

Ah  Hence your demented 

You meant it in the sense of someone acting demented not actually suffering dementia

Yeah.

Anyone come to mind

Yeah.

        Let’s not go there.

No

    But your EDP fits  If the shoe fits wear it

Yeah.

Learn something new every day

You think you’ll retain it?

No

Because it's an acronym?

Ja

    Theyre useless I don maintain useless things  Not in my skull

You say an emotionally disturbed person Ill be on it with you

Otherwise, no.

Ja

    Sorry. I thought everybody knew EDP is.  

1539,  Wednesday, 20  8. 25

0940,  Thursday,  21  8. 25