rosebud

                                        not the name uttered by a dyin old man hint  not capitalised

rosebud

       unfurling under his face before his eyes under his fingers a young womans nether unfurling under his tongue and teeth his gentle mouthings

he inhales her amorous scent its white phosphorous heat spice pheromone high pollen dribbling clear sweet nectar

its edges deepening to redsuffused with trembling hot bloodsoftly bruised  pleasantly irritated

she writhed  and sighed  her unfurling didnt stop 

it began to envelope her

he had a hand under her fannythe other at her thigh he could feel her muscles quiver shiver  he felt them relax  painlessly her femur went slack  flexible   cartilaginous  gasping she whippedtwisted her legs like tentacles around himover his shoulders clutching him tightly

she had had him by the hairsubtly directing himguiding him to her pleasure under his mouth and tongue her hands kneading his head her fingers twined and wound in his hair  she made soft guttural sighs sounding like soft bubbles percolating through a viscous organic mud bathsuddenly as he felt her legs transform she jerked and spasmed she pulled his hair but only for a moment then he could feel her fingers turn into petals anemone feelers  beckoners

feeders      

her unfurling didnt stop

it consumed herturning her inside out

an oysterlike rosebud           

glistening

iridescent

pink marbled with gentleshades of purple softviolet  trembling mauve skeins

turning under his face

slipping out of his arms his grasp 

growing smaller

then utterly transformed

he cupped her roiling coloured body in his hands and staggered over to his 220 saltwater aquarium  immersed her 

she sank fluttering  similar to a jelly  

she remained iridophoric glistening   reflective 

then sunk to the sandy bottom she whiled her way along it to a conchshell and inhabited it

he did not see her for a long time 

he assumed he missed her forays into the tank

then one evening  in the honeycoloured lighting of sunset bathing his room he saw a diminutive foot appear at the mouth of the conchshell her slick roiling pinkness followed and began to unfurl  

                                                                  unfurl

unfurl  unfurling

                      unfurlingunfurling  a Venus growing

emerging

           he clasped her like a babe in his arms lifted her from the tank and laid her on the bed where last she was whole 

where she became whole again

wily again

when she spoke she asked You remember

he did

      she asked him after they met and had known each other for a bit                                    

could he keep a secret

         

         

very early Friday morning, still dark,  9  3. 18

1154,  Monday,  2  4. 18

Genesis The Serpent https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oNnube-npX0

some people Joe Doakes inherently honest  can slip an submit to a streak of larceny

that wasnt his problem

he submitted to irreverence  painted jetblack   a humour

it synched withlined up well with his often enunciated take on life Its like a comedy club  anif you dont want to be offended  dont come in

Really  Please   Stay out

That’s ludicrous.

Whats ludicrous about it

You’re born you don’t have a choice.

I had a choice

You had a choice?

I did

Care to enlighten me of this choice you aloneof all people have enjoyed?

Certainly though you must have been inattentive in womb if you cant remember yours  There was a being in line directly ahead of mewe were being issued  I looked past the expectant parents who were readying to take the next being  behind them I saw that the next expectant couple was Southern and blacknot that theres anything wrong with that  but having had my ear long to the ground I was extremely aware of the Souths raw prejudiceits Jim Crow  I knew at the very heart of my being that my chances as an angry young black man would have me either murdered or imprisoned so I push down the being ahead of mestepped over them an leapt into the awaiting arms of my Chicago near North Side young white Polish parents I was their firstborn

I have no regrets 

On occasionhowever I find myself hoping the being I jumped over was sharp enough to hold up their hand to the next in line  an when they clasped hands one helping the other up the sharp one using their weight as leverage threw themselves down again an launched the hapless helpful next being into the young black couples arms  occasionally as well I see the hapless being not being so hapless  not letting go of the hand they helped  an both of them now  siblings twins  to the black couple

You’re right. That’s not ludicrous. NO.  That’s nuts.

Yawant your teeth scattered on the floor like Chiclets

No.

Then I suggest you recant  An apologise

Alright, I’m sorry. I have no memories associated with my birth. I’m probably wrong . .

. . Probably

No. Not probably. I shouldn’t have impugned you.

No you shouldntve

I shouldn’t have, I am sorry. I apologise.

Do you see why I wouldntve made a good life as a black man

Yes. I can see that.  There’s truth to your words.

There is  Thank you

apocalysp

thats what you get when you got a retard a child of downdownDown syndromeparalyzed from the waist up  and then worse also afflicted with a speech impediment that no therapy is going to help

their impediment is hardwired

it cant be hotwired

some questions dont have answers

it seems with everyones panties in a knot over the sensational forthcoming Apocalypse Robotapocalyse MachineHeadMight  programmers have doomed us  doomed by AIs spendthrift Singularity  Stephen Hawking skipped the planet either lacking the will or unwilling to wait around for Mans Descent Machines Rightful Ascension and all this as if it were some kind of guaranteedaccepted Royal Succession  a Monarchy  not an Anarchy

once he saw it written ANARHY  spraypainted in black on an tan brick alleywall  but anarchy aint getting to anarchy if its anarhy 

they werent clever 

he tracked down the fella

the guy wore a stiff yellowcoloured mohawkDont Eat Yellow Snow whose naked skull was inked with sides of a Bald Eagle and a fantastic Phoenixtheir wingtips interlocked he said under the thick strip of hair

You dont look stupid to me

I’m not.

Spell anarchy

he licked his lips as he smiled  You see my work off Harmon Place?

I did  Very revealing I believe

Yeah. Nice work. I’m really proud of it.

An artist should take pride in their workHow do you spell anarchy

A – N -- A – R – H – Y.  Anarchy.

Thats what I thought

Yeah, man.  You gonna turn me in for defacing an alley?

No  I was curious

You a private dick?

Youd think Id ought to be  No   Just needed to satisfy my curiosity Kent  Youre secret identity is safe with me

                

1622,  Monday,  12  3. 18

1156,  Easter Fool’s Sunday,  1  4. 18

Peter Gabriel  Games Without Frontiers  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3xZmlUV8muY

Easter Fool's Day

Have fun this Easter Fool's Day he wrote his nephew in an emale I can see Christ, laughing, heartily slapping his knee, "No. I didn't rise. That wasn't me. No.  April Fool's."

his nephew wouldnt take offensefew people he associated with would an those who didif interlopers eavesdroppers or mere collateral damage it wouldnt bother him if they did long ago he quit taking offense at people who believed in fiction they werent in his sphereran in his circle  they were flatlanders

no matter

         he couldnt remember a time in his existence that April Fool's and Easter intersected an he intended to have far too much fun at religions expense

frankly at his granddaughters expenses too 

he got his daughter to act as intermediaryshe had the coloured plastic eggs

he handwrote notes to them  Ah.  April Fool's.  love, grampa  his daughter placed them inside the eggs an hid them for the girls to find

if they took the tease wellan he teased them as ruthlessly as he teased his own daughters then their mother was going to give them the money he sent to her with the notes

if they didnt take the tease she was to keep the money for herself  it wasnt sufficient to be dishonest about or mebbe it wasHA   

never can tell about money 

hed seen people swipe tips off restaurant tabletops  the times he caught up with those people he could hardly believe they refuted himwerent embarrassed to two men he said If we end up out in the street Im going to beat you an take whatever cash you have in your pockets take it back inside an leave it on the table Take me at my word he walked them back to the table one he told to leave more I swear that’s all that I took off it! An Im supposed to take a thiefs word Put more down several times people he grabbed in the middle of the diningroom screamed Somebody please call the police! an he screamed over them YES! PLEASE! SOMEBODY CALL THE POLICE! You really wanna fuck with me they became docilewalked back over to the table an put down what they took he saw the pocket they put the money in Arent you embarrassed? a couple thieves asked him Wha fucking planet you come off of

some people are just cunts

cunt was a sacred word to him

he only used it for people who earned it

when they were Cuntian

a small elite clutch

HAPPY EASTER FOOL’S DAY!

1513,  Friday, Good Friday as he was reminded by the fiction believers,  30  3. 18

Aww   he couldnt resistnot that he tried real hard or at all 

it was Easter Fools Day tomorrow 

a good Good Friday happened yesterday under the last Super Moon until 2020

so this was Easter Evenot as hot as Christmas Eve  Christmas Eve had better legs and elegantly sculptured feet  toes like perfectly formed canapes

EVE! he refuted

                somewhere in the back of his skull like from the back of a closet where things are shovedlost on purpose something  something  perhaps a welldeveloped dust bunny a Cuniculus OHNO thatll teach him for dabblingreading in his dictionary distracking himself dropping his Wandering Jew imaginationhow appropriate a mythical immortal Jew who taunted Christ on his way to the Crucifiction and was cursed to walk the earth until the Second Coming  who Gustave Dore etched so exquisitely  Cuniculus AH so very close to cunnilingus – hed have to try that with Sue at the back of his closet under his barrage of hung fall and winter clothing – under their thrashin theyd come crashin crumblin down https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PErUiAyVoGc Sued be down for that  the dust bunny cried at the top of its lungs HOLY SATURDAY!

Holy Saturday Batman

                                                                                     no   he wouldnt resist himself

Easter Fools Day was a Dead Mans Party  immortalised by Oingo Boingo

     

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_No6VNIP1kY

1022,  Saturday,  31  3. 18

he stopped walking and leaned against a public trash built like incinerators once were decorated concrete immovable a round metal bin and cap fitted within

it was Old Town a historic district to game tourists   

he was another kind of tourist

he didnt belong anywhere

he didnt have roots

                   and maybe that was whyafter all these years he realised why his many siblings didnt come West but remained steadfast burrowed in their Midwest domiciles places they called home homes in neighbourhoods among friends and acquaintances

he didnt pursue friendships or community

fact was friends required cultivation  and time

he had plants and ferals

his cultivation card was filled up

bingbing  he brought his cell up to his face as he leaned against the stout stone-aggregate trash receptacle

his brotherinlaw texted him

absently over the top of his fone he nodded to a woman who stood inside a shop facing him through its open door

she nodded back

Fourth Quarter texted  :  Want a ride down or rather walk about?

:  Had errands.  I’m within five minutes of Molly’s.

:  K

they were meeting for a beer

texts came in from his daughters

he wrote them he was meeting their uncle

in between the sudden flurry on his cell he glanced up and saw that the young woman was still watching him

he acknowledged her again a simple nodhe didnt know her from Adam from the disarray inside the shoponce a cafe he assumed a change of venue a new business venture

he wasnt curious

rapping out succinct replies he noted the time Fourth Quarter expected hed be there at 1615 hours

it was 1610

he texted his girls :  Got go! I love you.

placing the cell in a pocket of the rucksack hanging from his shoulderstill leaning on the rocksolid trash he glanced up again at the woman 

she was still looking at himin his direction  

he wondered if she knew him

he looked harder at her  no she wasnt familiar

Ohno NO

         she wasnt familiar to him

he rocked up off the receptacle nodded once more to her she nodded back then he walked up the street

in a harness slung before her her baby a toddler had her breast between their kneading hands suckling 

her blouse was wideopen in a V  her breasts exposed

she wasnt shy she was a mother breastfeeding

he wasnt shy either

hed breastfedhad a six-pak of wet nurseswas always on the lookout for an opportunity though didnt particularly want to share

         at least not with an infant

1545,  Monday,  26  3. 18

1509,  Day-between-Two-Ts,  28  3. 18

Crosby, Stills & Nash  Cathedral  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wI7phwtRjUA

he spent a decade working for a cellular telephone company whose singleminded unrelenting paranoia went by the namethe bark! CHURN 

CHURN was hardwired into every employees skullthe sole purpose of their working existence and more if they werent careful 

corporate resembled an anthill a bee hive a communal mind 

he tried to speak truth to that mind

                                    if he had lucky stars he would have thanked them 

he made no mistakehe was keenly aware of his unmitigated fortune he was hiredhis employment preceded the advent the cancer of corporate culture

                               he couldnt get hired now he hadnt an anglehe couldnt beat the culture gatekeepers

the loyalist the army ant warriors  

corporate culture has metastisised its been welded it is inflexible shit descends from on-high and flows very hard  underlings wont dare question authority  not if they want to ascend  

while working the daily CHURN  the numbers his department generated why generate? why not ameliorate? were the best among the various departments

their numbers werent half of those nationally published

one would have thought their efforts would have been rewarded  he did   loudly

corporate: You have a job. You should be thankful you have one.

he never learned out of whose mouth that came

he asked    

now on the other side of CHURN his assessment remains intact unperturbed unchanged  CHURN is peverse

cunthowever might take that as a compliment  

he wasnt entirely convinced cunt understood churn

his fledgling and flailing and failing young administration cranked out historic or ahistoric percentages

but

   maybe whats turned sidewise in the presidents thinskinned thin eggshell skull churn is an adjectivedescriptive  perhaps he believes it touts his churning  his spattering bubblingmagma his churning juices  his vitality after all didnt he reel inbed a porn star a Playboy bunny foreplayed with and fingered bevies of beauties “And when you’re a star, they let you do it. You can do anything.” his chorus(khoros)his echo(eche): Whatever you want. “Yes. Whatever I want.”

                         
his Big Being all tied up in his seminal vas deferens  which possibly in Cuntian means: “I am to be afforded seminal deference.”

couldnt you see him nodding like a drinking ostrich                                                                 

he could

2344,  Day-Between-Two-Ts,  28  3. 18

1451,  Thursday,  29  3. 18

1028 days remaining or fewer

https://imgur.com/gallery/pT8TNO9  lose the hat give it coiffured blonde hair

5:40 minute-mark isnt a bad place to start:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t0pBEeYFwR0

the sun came out after three days of rainno bitchin bout thatnot if you live in California

                                                                                             he did too

he had been waylaid by a cold

he made a rare exceptionfavoring himself indoors and listened to the rain at the windowpanes and pound overhead on the roof mesmerised he slipped into delicious colourful hypnagogic notions that moved like oil on the inside of his eyelids then darkened them and lent him to deep healing naps

keenly aware hed fall asleep he set an alarm to wake him for his evening shift to shower off his sweat dress for work and drive fortunately only eight miles

he had the world by the balls

he walked in the sun delighting in it mostly recovered

it occurred to himrather he realised  most of the towns overhead lamps and streetlights had been pinioned with thin metal spikes diverting birds from roosting atop them 

as if the birds were the nuisance

when light chokes night of its natural element it ought to amount to more than his pained issue

however community leaders sought and made the quiet investments defending them with citations the responsibility the necessity to provide secure lighted ways and protect of the citys economic storefronts

their whining always wearied him 

somebody was making a buck 

he wondered what ssh quiet portion of that buck worked it way backhe also wondered Benjamin Franklin  Those who would give up essential Liberty, to purchase a little temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty or Safety.

to be sure the quote is appropriated contextualised a pull-quote a thesis regarding money more than liberty however when money means more and has always meant more to select individualsindividuals who were publicly electedwho were granted power to act only in behalf of and for the betterment of their constituents  its overlaying sense  albeit unspoken implied they were to regard an equality for the Whole of any disbursement realised not holes secretly torn in the Wholes pocket

he holed up for three days
                           now sunlight was his best disinfectant

were birds the nuisance

the uncounted trees taken down

an exceptional few replanted

was the displaced wildlife considered  where were they to gowhere were the small smashed communities of fourlegged sixlegged eightlegged and winged earthlings to go

AH  who would humanly have a fealty to them  theyre lesser

no handholding they havent hands

no having their backs their spines arent upright

victimised no compassion was allotted them

when the mad rubber eventually hits the road this ugliness will have to be owned  owned first by the ignorant hapless pawns  then those who all the while had pushed the pawns forward from behind hoping whatever it is is appeased and glutted and thereby they can save themselves

it doesnt feel like hyperbole

1447,  Monday,  26  3. 18

1306,  Twosday,  27  3. 18

Starship  Sunrise  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d0Ds7QQf0q0

Jesuschrist  the town turned itself inside out this righteous nest these salt of the earth grandchildren of pioneers he supposed that might be one name for land thieves who slaughtered Inian encampments or piecemeal taking scalps for bounty

from where he stood the communitys contortions writhing an conniptions were absolutely delicious  their sainted city fathers hadnt made laws to safeguard them from a devil in the flesh an entrepreneur who discovered it didnt have effective provisions to keep pornography from its groomed sacred Wild West confines                                       

Oops

their outrage blinded them

they spent hundreds of thousands of dollars to deny the entrepreneur his rights

they lost

they paid out hundreds of thousands of dollars in restitution  essentially affording Diamond Adult Worlds property and building and renovations and probably more stock and paraphernalia than they might stomach

hubris can get you that

since the porn shop sat nearly square between the high school and junior high their alcohol-free drug-free smoke-free weapon-free campuses FREE? the city campaigned and ultimately provided another property and building for Diamond to relocate

hundreds of thousands of dollars more

ostentatiously removing the business from plain sight

out of sight out of mind

                        just as the School Board and District officials did to the communitys pregnant teenage girls

he recognised one of the things he liked best about Diamond Adult World was its steep inclined driveway off the towns thoroughfare El Camino Real  The Kings Highway that as you drove up it or walked up your gaze went into the loose crown of very old digger pines and the blue sky through it

                                                               or in other words  at Diamond the sky was the limitduh

1430,  Monday,  26  3. 18

1058,  Twosday,  27  3. 18

TomPetty  Into The Great Wide Open  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yF0cqNFVyEM