22.3.18



sometimes dreams come in off the street rudely  

theyre pungent unkempttheyll take up anything youve left vacant or unaccounted for  never mind that you had plans for them or didnt expect anyone or anything to challenge you

thats your mistake  

dreams move in righteously and they demand your concession  obviously you have plenty of space  its no matter to them that you carved it out for yourself

why would they or should they heed you

theyve gotten this far


they gloat



you have to realise that only violence will move them
                                                              their violence is extraterrestrial
it is from a realm a province you have no experience with and you will lose a myriad of painful battles before you can take back ground

whoever is most formidable will prevail


the battles are psychic horrific  gruesome

your dreams attempt to overwhelm you  they seek devises that make you squeamish then too embittered raw and consumedtoo embattled to recognise what hangs in the balance


his dreams devastated the people and places of his youth those fierce memories and touchstones  they were flayed horribly tortured murdered they were dismembered a piece at a time all the while begging the ruthless things to stop they were quilled with blasted glass slivers and shards they were set on fire and like burning paper ash or leaves they screamed as they waft into the air their fat smoking black they were penetratedpunched full of holes  sighed like bone flutes

then it was stopped

he was awakened

he fell back to sleep

and it began again in a different place the people tortured again slivered bludgeoned joints pulled apart hooked hung boiled drowned in shallow puddles thickened with coagulated blood feces and humours

then it was stopped

he was awakened

but before he fell back to sleep he found weapons and took them in with him

he couldnt save them all

but the ones he did save he armedthen

stopped

awakened

falling back to sleep

he returned with bulging sacks of brutal armament  

the tide was turning

they didnt stop until the dreams concededuntil they fled


these dreams didnt return didnt seek revenge



dreams have memories to corrupt too


recurring dream all last night,  Thursday,  22  3. 18

21.3.18




its funnyits funny he writes its funny when the subject hes consideringmulling over  isnt

he doesnt know what that is

he assumes a defense mechanism 


in defense of what



he forgot now what initiated his its funny  sidetracked by cunt feeling empowered by McCabes firing to go after the special counsel Muellerhe didnt know what to liken that to  then feeling empowered cunt goes it aloneagainst his advisors recommendations(he knows better – he can identify his asshole from a hole in the ground) to congratulate Putin on his electoral victory in Russias sham presidential election – to a fourth term – Putin aint no Franklin Delano Roosevelt unlessof course  Roosevelt framed or murdered political social adversaries and journalists

he was beginning to wonder what color cunts panties were


he was placing his trust in an unmolested Mueller prosecution(which cunt evidently relishes)



Vegas had given him real long odds on his one thousand dollar bet that cunt an Pence would be impeached (he apologised to the fruit for its defamation) the House was going Democratic with their victories in the 2018 elections
then the Speaker of the House in 2019 would be elevated to serve as president until the 2020 election


Day-between-Two-Ts,  21  3. 18
1036 days or fewer remaining

postscript  once cunts in prison stripes(not flattering to his bulbous figure) wrioter will be free to be creative: riot          

16.3.18




cunt  our sshhsecret wannabe President for Life spoke haltinglyincoherently to fundraisers in Missouri on Wednesday (theyd like to unseat Senator Claire McCaskill)

So last year with China, we lost 500 billion dollars, would you say that? Not million, 500 million, that's a lot. 500 billion dollars. And it's been that way for years, from 200 to 504 billion dollars, every year.

We rebuilt China, we actually did. You take that money away from China.

I mean we rebuilt it, and it all started with the World Trade Organization (WTO). If you look at China, it's like this for many, many centuries.

World trade, it's like a rocket ship, and much of it came right out of this country, got to stop it. And I'm very friendly with the (Chinese) president (Xi Jinping), he's a great guy (who seeks to make himself President for Life; Putin negates his opposition one way or another in an attempt to do the same). We have a great chemistry, a great relationship. But he's for China and I'm for the good old USA. [Applause.]”


the (Applause.) at the end of that portion of cunts talented remarks bothered him

where in there was there anything to applaud . . it all started with the WTO. If you look at China, it’s like this for many, many centuries. 

what is  like this for many, many centuries

painfully he read the entirety of his remarksstill marveling the man is president

the only solace he mustered for the day was from an article he read in South China Morning Post  political commentator Cary Huang  who said that Xis attempt to become Chinas “de facto monarch” could have pitfalls: “History has shown that many political leaders who sought lifelong service have not managed to realize their vision . . Some have been deposed . . others have been assassinated by political enemies”.


its curious that the sunshine to his day came up only after he read of politicians deposed or assassinated


Friday,  16  3. 18
1041 days remaining or less


15.3.18

Psalve 23


Psalm 23 crowded him right on a rainy highway also beset by groundfog an gale  

he was in the righthand lanehis foot off the gasbearing down on semitrailer rig a scarcelyrevealed phantom throwing and shedding sheets of rainwater like a fastFORWARDED snake sheds skin

CHRIST he said under his breath glancing down at his speedometer  53  

Psalm 23 were the words on the sticker on the righthand formedbumper of a babyblue Nissan Rogue which didnt strike him particularly religious that had him boxed in for nearly a mile apparently the driver having passed him briskly suddenlyeased up braked to entertain their animated frontseat passenger who was wowed by stacks of creosote ties on the blackened shoulder immediately above the railroad tracks immediately overlooking the chopped bowl of the rocking Pacific

if 23 was so desperate to be a sightseer they should have begged out of the lefthand lane slipped in behind him and thrown On their hazards
                          highways posted 70

their rudeness inconsideration provoked him to absently consider various things regarding the babyblue riders minor irritations why would someone paste a sticker on the extreme righthand of a bumper EXTREMELY RIGHT? why is it when he sees psalm he thinks psalve why should the driver and their occupant Shall not want are Righteous theyre oblivious however that theyre treading near the Valley of Death if he were to met them off road  at least the stony Valley of Hurt where THY immaterial Rod and Staff would be little or sufficient protection in the presence of their enemy Ohbrother he really really wanted to help them dwell in the House of the Lord today  then perhaps Forever
he could fashion it if they truly wanted to join Him

he had access to plenty of wood  




or maybe he was just being facetious


1427,  Friday,  9  3. 18
1514,  Twosday,  13  3. 18

14.3.18



the animals that walk up beside him and park their asses at a urinal is mindboggling

yah  men    animals
                      hed yet to have a woman saddle up beside himwhip out her lavendercoloured FUD her GoGirl as a matter of fact hed likely admit Yah you go girl  Go for it  chances are shed direct her stream at the heart of the urinal shake off her FUD and not daub his shoetops or pantlegs shed be polite  he wouldnt mind if askew she eyed his cock and commented on his junk  when it comes out of a guys mouth its a little harder to take the compliment and say thank you  he was courtesy to a fault even if it was a come-on at the urinal  at least the guys paying attention to the business at hand

hes stood beside guys who may have been so strenuously homophobic  not to glance at your cock  that they stared above eyelevel at the wall before them or craned their necks to stare up at the ceiling  trouble with that kind was they didnt take care of businessthey often slopped off mark and spattered them both Christ      

no  he wouldnt have a problemwouldnt mind a woman rubbernecking  taking a gander at his cock 



hed seen all kindshed seen guys urinate and back away from the urinal to see if they could arch two feet three feet fourfive and make it back before running lowtapping out

hed seen guys open their pants then drop them to their ankles their underwear following and urinate bare ass

hed seen guys in animated conversationheated arguments suddenly turn to their nemesis and piss on them try to apologise  and sometimes their foes retaliating and pissing on them   
pissing matches are a real thing

aint golden showers variety
                            which aint as tawdry as theyre made out to be  not between consenting adults  let their freak flags fly  aint a soul injured

B U T


his most outrageousmost humourous experience happened just yesterday

he was in an Irish pub Sullivans  warming up for the coming Saint Paddys Day

the Mens Room  one basin three urinals three stalls

always looking to provoke discomfort he took the middle urinal(too many years of athletic lockerrooms behind him to make him uncomfortable with nudity or cocks) admittedly  cocks are funnylooking  if there is a Godwhich he had no doubt didnt exist  those who believed had to concede that He had a hilarious sense of humoursense of the ridickulous


in walks this guyhes undoing his pants even before he reaches the wallmounted urinal

he made eyecontact with him  Hows it goin

Hate that I rent beer

I hear ya

a moment of silence

the splash of his stream commingles with the sound of his

then the fella begins to humming as hes finishing Shake your love  Oh shake your love  I just cant shake your love

he looked him in the side of his headhe hadnt turned to him yet  Debbie Gibson

he didnt turn to him  If I could drag any woman into a Mens Room  I want her to be Debbie Gibson  You

Never thought about it

Maybe you ought to


Twosday evening,  13  3. 18
1406,  Day-between-Two-Ts,  14  3. 18
FUD: female urination devise
Debbie Gibson  Shake Your Love  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZHkJSSvI74o



13.3.18



things are skewed when you catch them out of the corner of your eye

you look

what you thought you saw isnt what you see saw  something other is in its steadyou recognise hints of what might have directed your imagining  what you did see  part of a dream snagged on a tree branch in a reflection in a mirrorface a store window in the waves of heat radiating out of the ground


things are a little different when they surprise youout of the corner of your eye and you stop and look at them directly and they acknowledge you a raised eyebrow a subtle head nod a hand gesture and you acknowledge them  and then they transform into something else very concreteyou can walk up to and touch talk to it if you wantedhe talked

he wonderedquestioned 

Why?


it wasnt like it disappearedit transformed

he witnessed its transformation




he walked into the hall out of the studio where he wrote

across from the studio door was the bathroom door a slight offset

the front door to the house was open

in the halllooking to his leftover his shoulder through the screen door looking over the gravel drive to his neighbours lot  on its raised earthwork  an Indian stood in a loincloth he held a crude bow and a clutch of arrows in his left hand

seeing him through the screen the Indian raised his right his palm facing him

he stopped completely in the hall

he turned and faced the Indian 

he raised his left his palm flat to the Indian

then the Indianstill erectstill looking at him slowly began to shrink and as he shrank he transformed into the tree stump that had grown in the earthwork


he crossed the livingroom to the screen door

it wasnt until he was at the door that he realised his hand was still uppalm faced out

opening the door with his right he walked out onto the front porch

it was an overcast day

it threatened rain

it rained yesterday

but it didnt smell like rainit smelled cooled refreshed  moist


the tree stump was as it was



he wondered if the Indian hadnt been transformed into a tree for some transgression

later forced to bear his amputations

rendered

belittled


he saw a strong young manit was curious to him that anyone would take a tree down into a five foot stump and leave it to weather 

it didnt throw greenshoots during the Spring

it was simply a stoic stump  a remnant

of what once was



he turned away  

he walked back into the houseshut the screen door behind himwalked through the livingroom to the hall

he felt he was being watched

he turned once more and looked a tree stump




he doesnt look at the tree stump the same way any more

he doesnt have any idea how to help

he thinks that somehow he is supposed to help that is his nature

whenever he walks past the stump descending the driveway to the street below he acknowledges him  then quietly asks how he can help 

Stoic


no matter

that wouldnt stop him from asking




he knew what he saw

that was unshakable



1312,  Monday,  12  3. 18


If Pompeo(who he has likened to Pompeii) a Drumpf collaborator an misfit is confirmed as Secretary of State  Americas chief diplomat  hell succeed as miserably as Kelly has as White House Chief of Staff

Drumpfs Best People over and over and over again
0949,  Twosday,  13  3. 18


Oh  Gina Haspel   as CIA Head       theres torture

good to have a collaborator who doesnt mind getting her hands dirty

0959,  Twosday,  13  3. 18

12.3.18




he texted his daughters from the street where he was witnessing what he wrote  :  They’re tearing down Coco’s, across from Adobe Plaza . . . the erasing continues until the eraser catches up with you . . .   strange thought.


he didnt receive a responding text from either

he wasnt the one who had a smartphone

he happened to have his cell with him

his girls didnt go anywhere without theirs

he had a landline telephone

they didnt

he did not doubt that they received his text


it was a strange text he recognised that as he reread it  before sending

that they didnt respond made it stranger

he didnt know if they communicated about it between themselvesthey often communicated about himleaving him out of the loop 

he was never comfortable with that it reminded him of talking behind someones backwhich he didnt do he didnt assumehe didnt surmise if he had a question a bitch a bone to pick he was front an center however he did understand confrontation wasnt everyones cup of tea

confrontation was his lifeblood  

a necessity like air water sustenance



the erasing continues until the eraser catches up with you


what did he mean by that


his daughters knew that all the houses he lived in his life except one were razed or burned down

they knew the story of his mother one day distracted on Western Avenuesuddenly tell him Look left  That parking lot is where the house that we lived in stood when you were a babywhen you first came home from the hospital

that was strange  looking out the car window at a parking lot for a strip mall a smattering of cars

We got a plaque or something of remembrance erected there Maw

No  I . .I just thought you should know so youd remember

This is your an dads old neighbourhood  Chances are Ill never be this way on my own again or even if I did I wouldnt remember a parking lot

Anyway  I just thought youd like to know is all

Thank you for the thought  I hope you remember to share with dad when were home that you were in the old neighbourhood an went past where you lived when I was a baby  I think hed like that




the erasing continues until the eraser catches up with you

the girls knew that the family home he grew up in third grade an on was torn downthe seventh storey apartment he lived in for two years during college in Miami was devastated by a small commuter airplane crash a propjobthe last place in the town he still lived in burned to the ground

he went headlong through a police line to save his three cats  

the police advised him they could have arrested him for violating the line 

That cheap plastic yellow ribbonfuck you he was still holding his cats in the wicker laundry basket he tossed them in under a bath towel





the erasing continues until the eraser catches up with you

apparently the trick is to stay one step ahead
   

0958,  Day-between-Two-Ts,  7  3. 18
1234,  Monday,  12  3. 18
Joni Mitchell  Big Yellow Taxi  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=94bdMSCdw20

11.3.18


We could be friends
                      icewater ran in his veins

he mimicked We could be friends

Yes  Ill dance you sing
                         the B52s Love Shack had began as she and a friend entered the liquorstore where he worked  the friend heavilytatted was man  or boy a male  howbout the opposite sex  what tribe he was of wasnt distinct or were his tattoos thematic  he had come to accept body art as eclectic  she had none  she recognised the happy storm of Love Shack and broke out into dance

from the rear of the store he saw her dancing  he called up to her Atta grrl let er rip  

she didnt break strideshe smiled she was too involved   

her friend neglected her prancing  he continued up into the store without either notice pleasure or bemusement  a real cold fishtoo cool for words  playing to an audience in his head

he didnt put the two together they were from separate jigsaw puzzles if they were together eventhough he wasnt a betting man hed bet if they tried to make it work itd fail  not today tomorrow this yearnext in the long run one or the other would wakeup and realise their partner and disconnect  he had been right about Christie Brinkley and Billy Joel who the fuck was kidding who  as hed been right about her meteoric riseabout Dorothy Strattens risewho should have been Playboys 25th Anniversary centerfold rather than Candy Loving as hed been right about Anna Nicole Smiths rise then a print model for Guess Jeans to the froth of Playboy  nobody listened to him  probably becauseby his own admission he was adverse to blondes  he couldnt rally a soul to buy into his prognostications for the very reason that blondes didnt make his cut  usually finding them glass baubles as compared to earthy women who wowed himsnapped his neck it was hard to beat 60s 70s natural and bush  he missed both desperately


We could be friends 

a buxom Rita Hayworth blackanwhite edition whispered that to him through her chattering teeth as they frolicked in the Pacific surf  he was teaching her to catch a wave with a boogie board because she needed the help and for whatever reason the young bucks left her to flounderIdiots 

never to leave a woman in distress or neglect an opportunity he offered his assistance  I can help if you like  because at your pace youll either turn blue or drown before you catch on or catch a wave

Ppappaleeaase 

Yes  Yah   You may go purple beyond blue if I dont help

a smile came up over her trembling teeth

I admire your tenacity girl


she was a capable student listened well  inside ten minutes with the help of sets of obliging rollers she hung right in beside him  either their exertion to catch the next wavetheir keen attention to each other or they grew too numb to care they were provided a respite or it insulated them from the cold salt sea
it never occurred to him she might have been playing a part

when her lips did go purple he motioned her to head in

running up onto the sunwarmed beach his blanket and towels closer to the water he took her board from hertucked them under up his arm then took her hand in his  

they stopped short of the blanket  he grabbed a beach towel for herwrapped her in it then grabbed another for himself 

her shaking seemed only to escalate Aw kid  here  lets opt for body heat  I have it on Holocaust authority two people can warm themselves together faster than separate 

opening his towel for her she opened hers and stepped into his armsher body against his  he wrapped them up and pivoted around so the sun struck her backside 

together  despite the chill of where their suits separated their skins he could feel an ascendant warmth gather  then beyond it a sensual heat simmer  

Better  he asked into the top of her head

Yes   Better


they held each other longer than they needed to to annihilate their chillsher shaking  they stood oblivious to their surroundings wrapped together talking aimlessly  her mouth at his chest and throat  his at her thick auburn hair the seashell curl of her ears

she was visiting the coast on her own  Two weeks she said  

she spent three with him  she reminded him of someone  someone beyond Rita


they wrote letters for several months  then she moved in with her mother on the East Coast to help consolidate her finances

her letters stopped abruptly


after several more months without receiving return lettershe wasnt going to stop until he had a reason he wrote family and friends letters and they never wrote back  letterwriting didnt play into their lifestyles because they were too lazy

then he received a letter from her mother Giselle curious name  he had only known or met a single Giselle in his life   Giselle  her name brought back fine memories  white sand Florida beaches at night  swimmingsnorkeling in the Keys  barbecued fish cold wine  sexual abandon

Giselle wrote that Sofia could not continue her relationship with him

he read more


then as he turned to the fourth pagethe foreplay at an end the meat revealed  Giselle admitted she was his Giselle from Miami  her pictures of him compared to Sofias were irrefutable he didnt remember either of them taking pictures of him like mother like daughter     
Oh     


like mother  like his daughter




We could be friends 

the startling young woman still bounding before him to Love Shack the heave of her breasts mesmerisingwarming him
he felt a flush

We could be friends he said but tell me your mothers name isnt Sofia 

Her name isnt Sofia


Youre not lying are you

Why would lie about that

I dont know  seems some women have a bloodhounds scent to them 

Does Sofia look like me

Did  I wouldnt know  I just prefer prefer  you arent  Im . . 
. . Youre attracted to me

I think our chemistry is obvious . .
. . Yes   Ill dance you sing 


And him  he motioned with his head to her friend still among the stacks

Him  Hes an acquaintance  I wanted to take some fresh air and he was running out for some wineWhy do people out here drink winestupid

You prefer spirits

Damnright  This time of year its cold at home and nurtured in the East wine hasnt much of a place or appeal in my world

East

Yes

Your mothers name isnt Sofiaseriously

She isnt Though I sense theres a story behind your trepidation


Yes

Id like to know it   Be my friend

Youre bosom buddy


Maybe



Thursday night,  8  3. 18 
2119,  Sunday, Daylight Savings Time: why?  11  3. 18